Disclaimer; I don't own anything in the DC universe.

Chapter 20

He had been staring at nothing for so long that Beast Boy finally left him alone. The only words he had said in the past hour or two were: "Lock the door behind you".

Hesitantly, he reached out to stroke her hair. "Come on Rae. Come on. It's a coma. It's in your mind. We all know you can pull yourself out of it. What's holding you back?" he whispered, more to himself than to the pale girl on the bed.

His fingers caught in her hair; it had dried blood in it. His first impulse was to pull away, but he forced himself not to. It was time to face what he had done and confess. He was sorry. He, Robin, the Boy Wonder, was sorry.

"Rae, I hope you can hear me. I'm pretty sure you can, or else I'm just going crazy. But I'm sorry. I know I never said it, but I am. I'm sorry for being obsessive, for leading you on while I was still undecided. The truth is, Rae, I wasn't sure. I did enjoy that kiss, back on the rooftop. I don't know what I am anymore, Rae, and it's because I'm confused. I think I love you. I think I still love you, that is. But Starfire's loss was the one that pushed me over the top, right? Well, do you want to know a secret, Rae? I didn't go over the top until you were lost. And, I don't know, it just seems like I've had a whole lot of time to think things over. So if you don't hate me when you get back, let's start over. No dating, no emotions, just going back to being friends until we can work back up into a romance," he paused, taking her hand in his own. "Don't leave me, Rae. Please."

His hands shook as he tried to compose himself. Talking was hard. Emotions were hard. But he'd learned that bottling them up was worse. As he tried to regain control of his breathing, he cupped her chin. She was so delicate, and he almost feared to touch her. But it was all in his head, right? Raven was the strong member of the team, the one that you went to when there was a problem, the one that could handle anything.

"Of course," he said quietly, "if you like Beast Boy much better, I understand that too. After all, he's the one that tried to help out, he's the one that you saw sacrifice himself for you, right? I guess I'm not much of a hero compared to him anymore. Running from my problems, I guess that's always what I've done. But, Rae, it's just so much easier to run from your past than it is the face it, you know?"

He laughed gently. "Of course you know. If anyone knows about running from who you are, it's you. I guess I should have learned from that experience, huh? That just goes to show how thick I am, right?" He chuckled. "But it's that stupid pride that holds me back. You've told me that so many times, and Starfire has many more times. Even Beast Boy and Cyborg tell me that."

The annoying beeping sound in the background seemed to distract from the mood, but he wouldn't turn it off. He couldn't. Those machines told him whether or not she was still holding on to life. And as much as he didn't want to hear it, that one, long, resounding beep that would signal her last breath needed to be heard. Because if he couldn't hear it, he'd be talking to nothing. And then he'd really be crazy.

He dropped his head in his hands, trying to think straight. He couldn't let his emotions get the better of him. He was trying to talk it all out. One emotion at a time. Focus, Boy Wonder. How could he let emotions get in the way of emotions? Nothing made sense anymore!

So he threw caution to the wind. Maybe if he could shock her systems back into working ..."If this doesn't wake you up, I don't know what will," he muttered as he leaned forward. His lips met hers and he could feel the warmth of her breath. She took a deep breath and seemed to relax. It was working!

Then, suddenly, he felt a soft tickle on his forehead as her eyes opened, and he pulled away to stare into those beautiful pools of light. His heart missed a few beats, though, as he saw the pain in her eyes. The part of her that was so close to death. But she was awake, there was no denying that.

A small smile spread over her lips and she took his hand. "So, the ultimate question has been answered. Why is Robin the way he is? Because he's a stubborn moron who's afraid of his own emotions."

He laughed softly. "Well, you retained your sarcasm. That's good. How do you feel?"

"Not sure," she said, experimentally lifting her arms and flexing her fingers. "And you? I thought Beast Boy said that you..."

"Died? I've 'died' before, remember? The important thing is that I'm here now. And I promise I won't be a moron anymore. I thought a lot about my emotions those weeks before I decided to go to Slade, and I figured out a lot as well."

"Robin..." she sighed, gently pushing his hand away from her cheek. "Robin, no."

"No? Rae, you...I..." Why was she turning him down? What had he done wrong? Hadn't it been Raven who was so mad at him going to someone else in the first place?

"Look, Robin, I know you're confused, but..." she sighed heavily. "Look, it's just that Starfire and I just healed the tear in our friendship over you, and I wouldn't want to reopen that wound." She closed her eyes and looked away, then smiled slightly. "No matter how much I'm excited to hear you say it."

He nodded. "Of course. I'm glad that you two are friends again, and I don't have the right to ask you to throw that away."

"Plus she'd be mad at you, and trust me, you don't want to know how that feels," she chuckled.

The floor. Stare at the floor. Think of something else. "Yeah, I guess."

There was silence for a moment before Raven suddenly gasped, "Robin, what happened to your leg?"

He flushed; apparently he hadn't hidden the crutch well enough. "I...well, when Beast Boy and I fought, I kind of lost."

She raised an eyebrow, then chuckled. "So you broke into the tower with a bad leg? I keep forgetting how much I underestimate you sometimes. Why the sudden need to get inside?"

He bit his lip, knowing that if he told her, she would needle him. "I saw a green flash..."

"..and thought that it was Starfire, so you rushed to see her. Don't hide it from me, lover boy, you still have feelings for her, so it's not a complete loss for you, now is it?" she finished for him, a wide smirk creeping over her face.

"I hate it when you do that, you know," he sighed, leaning against the opposite side of the bed.

She stretched her legs tentatively, then carefully got out of bed. "Yeah, well, at this point I can read you like an open book. Thanks for waking me up, by the way."

"I'm just glad you got back in one piece," he admitted. And he was. If something had happened to her, he would have never forgiven himself.

"Actually..."

"Oh no. Rae, I'm so sorry!" he blurted out before he could even think.

"No, Robin, it's okay. I can fix it; I'll just get Starfire to help out. See, when I was in my mind, I kind of...gave up. So right now my emotions are a bare minimum. That's why I'm not as upset as I would have been before that I have to give you up."

"But you can fix it?"

She chuckled, but she swayed a little as she did. "I think so," she said, but her voice said otherwise. It was going to be a long road, and even then she might not make it all the way.

He nodded, then rose to grab his crutch. "Well, what say we get out of this stupid hospital? I hate this place."

She managed a weak chuckle, though he could tell it was forced.

"It's okay, Rae, you don't have to laugh or anything. I'm just trying to lighten the-"

She held up a hand to stop him in mid-sentence. "I thought you said you wouldn't be a moron anymore?"

He smiled. "After you, madam."

TTTT

"He's been in there for a while now," Beast Boy said for about the third time as he paced the room.

"Perhaps he does not wish for us to see him when he is overwhelmed by emotion?" Starfire offered. Little did she know how right she was.

"Or maybe he's catching up with-" Red X was cut off when Jinx jabbed him in the ribs.

Starfire sighed. "It is okay. I know what he was going to say. And I cannot help but feel the same. Robin has been gone for so long that there is no telling where his heart lies, or his loyalties. I still cannot believe all that he has done while I was gone."

"Neither can we. He wasn't himself, Star," Cyborg sighed. "We'll just give him the benefit of the doubt for now, alright?"

The others nodded, all murmering in unison, "Alright."

Just then, the doors opened with a swish, and they all turned around.

"Hey, Robin, took you long..." Whatever Beast Boy was going to say died off as his mouth dropped open.

"Raven!" Starfire was the first to come out of her stupor as she rushed up to hug her friend, then stopped short. "May I give you the hug, or are you injured?"

"No, go ahead," Raven smiled.

"Glorious!" the Tamaranean beauty replied, lifting her friend off of the ground and spinning around.

The ice was broken, and the others laughed. As Jinx, Cyborg, Red X, and Beast Boy crowded Raven with excited shouts, Starfire managed to slip by to see Robin. "How did you manage to save our friend?" she asked.

"I didn't do it by myself, Star. I just knew that she needed a little push in the right direction," he sighed, and she knew from his expression that he didn't want to talk about it.

She took his hand and squeezed it gently. This time she didn't hurt him; she had learned after a lot of practice how to control her strength to meet the standards of humans. "Robin, I wish that you would tell me what is wrong. That would make it easier for me to give you advice. It would make it easier for me to understand you."

He nervously shifted his stance and looked away. "I'm not ready to talk right now, Star," he admitted, hobbling away.

"I wish that you would," she whispered before joining the others.

"Thanks again for everything that you did to help out," Robin said, shaking her hand.

Jinx and Kid Flash had packed their things and were ready to leave. They stood outside the Tower, saying their goodbyes. Jinx smiled as she let go of his hand, then said, "It was no problem. After all, where would you be without us? Just don't go breaking your leg anymore, okay?"

"And thank you too, Kid Flash. From what I've heard, you played the main role in getting Cyborg back together," Robin continued, adjusting his cape so that it wouldn't get in the way as he held out his hand.

Jinx grinned. Though he wouldn't let on, she could tell that Robin was relieved to be wearing his own uniform again. As they all were.

Robin stopped in front of Red X and took a deep breath as if he were forcing himself to talk. "X...I guess I owe you an apology. I should've listened to you..."

Red X shook his head. "Forget about it, kid. Just do me a favor and don't let on that I was helping you the whole time, okay? It would ruin my street cred."

Jinx chuckled as the dark-clad figure disappeared into the air. For a minute there, it had almost seemed like he was winking.

"Ready to go?" Kid Flash whispered in her ear.

"Just a minute," she whispered back, then walked up to Raven and gave her a warm hug.

"What was that for?" Raven asked, surprised.

"Because you looked like you needed it," Jinx said. "And because you're going to be going through a lot after we're gone, especially with Robin."

"Thanks," Raven whispered back.

Kid Flash raised his hand in a mock salute. "Well, off go the true heros of this story, never to be remembered for how much they really did, the unsung workers of miracles that-"

She playfully bopped him on the head. "Just get going already!" she laughed, taking his hand.

"Wasn't that what I wanted to do just two minutes ago?" he chuckled.

"I have the right to change my mind!"

"At least a couple hundred times!" he shot back jokingly, and before she could react, they were off. By the time they stopped, they were back home.

As she paused to catch her breath, Jinx asked, "Do you think they'll be able to pull through?"

He nodded quietly, "They always do, don't they?"

"What about Robin? Raven told me that they're revoking his membership for a while until he can get himself back together. Do you think he'll be okay?" she persisted.

Surprisingly, Kid Flash started laughing. As he tried fervently to control himself, he explained, "I'm sorry, it's just that...It's hard when you actually have to worry about the welfare of others, isn't it? When you were with the Hive, would you really have cared if this had happened to your team?"

"They were such idiots that it was only a matter of..."

"Exactly," he interrupted, pausing to catch his breath. "You're experiencing worry for the first real time. It's only natural. What happens will happen. Whatever punishment Robin gets, it's his own fault, and he's got to accept that. I think he already has. So you need to accept it too and move on."

"Do you think things will ever be the same again between them?"

His expression sombered as he sighed, "With something this big, there will be a definite change. But it doesn't have to be a bad thing."

"But what if it is?" she asked. This worry was starting to be a burden.

He sighed, putting his arms around her and pulling her close. "So what if it is? We all make mistakes and we learn from it. That's life."

"I wish life didn't have to hit you like a bulldozer," she lamented.

"Hey, when life give you lemons..."

She smiled up at him, her eyes sparkling with contained laughter. "...chuck 'em back at 'im."