I still don't own it, nor do I own "Hometown Glory" by Adele.
Great song!
Hey! Remember me? Sorry I've been MIA for like ever, but work was crazy and my connection is so slow that it puts a damper on my want to write. Plus, I've had some writers block. I can see it all in my mind, but getting it from there to Microsoft Word is a bigger feat than it seems.
I've been walking in the same way as I did
Missing out the cracks in the pavement
And tutting my heel and strutting my feet
"Is there anything I can do for you dear? Is there anyone I can call?"
"No and thank you, please Madam. I ain't lost, just wandering"
They walk into the house – well Jamie barges through the door and up to his room to see Chester – Nathan and Haley stroll in behind him with their fingers interlaced. She lets out a sigh at the sudden comfort this house gives her. She once dreaded coming here, but now the world looks a little brighter.
"I'm proud of you", Nathan whispers into her ear. His lips graze the shell of her ear and she shivers at the feeling. Haley turns to face him with an almost shy smile.
"I'm not really anything to be proud of", she argues. Nathan scoffs playfully and rolls his eyes. He pulls her into his arms knowing that this type of contact may not be the best move, but at the same time he can't stop himself. Haley's finally a shell of the woman he knew a few weeks ago and he wants to try to suck as much of that out of her as he can.
"Do you know how hard it would be for anyone else to do that? I know how hard it was for you and you pushed through", a genuine smile stretched across his mouth.
"Nathan—"
He cuts off what he knows will be a protest. "I'm serious, Hales. You amaze me", he whispers honestly. Her eyes cloud over and she leans up onto the very tips of her feet to kiss him quickly.
"I'm lucky to have you", she whispers back after they break apart. She knows she truly is. In any other case, any other man would have strayed from a crumbling marriage. He might have cheated or simply left her all together.
But Nathan is different.
He shakes his head. "I'm the lucky one. You've made me into the person I am", this was the truth and they both know it. Although, that truth may have been stretched. It's not to say that she didn't change him because everyone could agree that she did. But, he could only change because that person was inside of him, waiting to be pulled out and shown to the world.
"You've helped me become the person I used to be", he quickly brushes his nose against hers and then chuckles softly.
"Okay, we haven't been this gushy since high school", he murmurs with a laugh still in his throat. Haley joins the mirth and nods in agreement. She wraps his arms around her waist and savors in the feeling for a while longer.
"I think we deserve a little gushiness", she mumbles while kissing the base of his jaw. Nathan raises his brows. He appreciates her change in mood, but doesn't want to jump into anything too soon. Thankfully, James has some input of his own;
"Ewwww, gross!"
He says it like it's truthfully the most disgusting thing he's ever seen. Nathan chuckles; this probably is the most disgusting thing a four year old could see.
"Jeez, it's like staying with Aunt Peyton and Uncle Luke", he says while jumping onto the couch.
Nathan stiffens and Haley's mouth drops a little. Neither of them has spoken to their best friends – their family – in weeks. Nathan can feel his throat closing at the memory of their last encounter and Haley can't even remember her last encounter with him.
"Can we do something today?" James's voice breaks the tension that both of the adults are feeling and as Nathan relaxes he drops his arms from her waist, but grabs her hand in the process. They sit on the couch and Haley rests her back against Nathan's chest while James climbs into her lap.
"What do you wanna do, Jimmy Jam?"
Haley doesn't know how she went so long without doing this. Even this simple thing like sitting on the couch with her husband and her son. Right now it's the only thing she ever sees herself doing.
Being with them. Being a wife. Being a mother.
"I dunno", he says with a shrug. "What do you wanna do mama?"
She looks around the house. Her home that looks nothing like a home. It seems almost dark and dreary. As if it's been abandoned for years. When she thinks about this, it's pretty much true.
She and Nathan have been ghosts walking around the same carved out path that they haven't dared to stray from. Hey eyes flicker to her husbands and land on her son. With a grin on her face she asks a question;
"How about we get into the Christmas mood?"
Round my hometown
Memories are fresh
Round my hometown
Ooh the people I've met
They lay on the couch in complete silence. It's comforting. The gentle hum of each others breath is like their own personal lullaby. His arms are locked securely around her waist and she occasionally draws an invisible pattern on his t-shirt covered chest.
She shifts suddenly and all he can do is groan.
Her eyes rise to meet his and she smiles apologetically. She continues to settle into the position that she wanted and he can feel himself responding to her movements. In a lot of ways it's embarrassing. He's twenty-two years old – he should be able to control things like this.
But she's Peyton and it's like he's seventeen all over again.
Before she can do anything to protest his lips are on hers. He momentarily thinks back to a few hours ago in the Comet and her hesitation to advance their make-out session and knows he should stop. But the blood that usually flows through his head is traveling south and clouding any and all of his better judgment.
She responds even though she knows he'll only be disappointed. She can't help it though. Being this intimate with him is second nature, but at the same time it's like she's starting from scratch. His fingers crawl up her back and she shivers as his fingertips barely dance across her skin.
Lucas sits up and pulls her closer to him. The friction this movement creates causes him to pull back from her lips and groan loudly. She pants heavily before finding his lips once again.
He starts to pull her shirt from her body until her hands rest atop his; stopping his movements.
"The kids will be up soon", she whispers breathlessly. He doesn't argue, but the frown and flash of pain in his eyes tell her everything she already knows he feels. Disappointment. Anger. Frustration.
"Go take a shower", she teases while she scrunches her nose. It's an attempt to change the current mood and she's grateful when he scoffs and throws his head back.
"You love how I smell", he says matter-of-factly. She opens her mouth, but closes it quickly. She can't argue. His scent has always been a lead attraction and she still can't fully describe it. He's a grown man, but still has the smell of the teenage boy she fell in love with.
It's a strange mix of summer, the rubber smell of a basketball, the hint of a crowded auto shop, the sweet smell of a packed café, and love.
He radiates love from every pore of his body.
"You're right", she finally agrees after the stretch of silence, "But, the boys don't share the same sentiments", his jaw drops and before he can grab her she stands from the couch and is fully aware of the position she's leaving him in.
He watches as she bites her bottom lip and he leans forward. "I'll probably be a while", he jokes, but they both know he's not kidding. She nods absentmindedly and retreats to the kitchen.
He sighs as she walks away and has to stop staring; the sway of her hips is too much for him to handle. "Hey!" he calls out before standing. She turns around and he can only smile at her.
"I love you", he watches as she blushes and as she says the words back his heart leaps. After not hearing them for a little over a month he wants to hear them every minute of every day. And he would if that was possible.
Fifteen minutes later she's still in the kitchen finishing up breakfast. Scrambled eggs for Keith, bananas and strawberries for William, an omlette for Lucas, Sam never has breakfast so he wasn't an issue and she'll eat her toast and pick off of everyone else's plates.
Suddenly a pair of arms wraps around her waist and pulls her from the sink. She shrieks in glee and he spins them around before plopping into a chair. She buries her face into the crook of his neck and inhales that smell that she loves. It's moments like these – the little, almost insignificant ones – that make her wonder what would have happened if she hadn't gotten pregnant at seventeen.
Would they be together? Would she be all alone? Would he be with Brooke?
He kisses the base of her jaw and those thoughts melt away. "I have something for you", he whispers into her ear.
Her head snaps up and she stares into his eyes. Christmas is still a few days away, but if he wants to give her a present now, she isn't going to argue. With an excited expression she holds out both hands and closes her eyes.
He chuckles and thinks back to that night in junior year, when they went to Haley's party strictly as friends. That's what he had to keep reminding himself. He had lost her then and lost her for good after that night. But, before the drama ensued he had given her a present and had to hide his displeasure at the high five he received in return. Hopefully they'll at least make-out after she reads this.
He picks the manuscript up from the floor and places it into her waiting hands. She frowns and pumps her arms up and down; weighing the object. She sighs and opens her eyes.
"What is this?" she asks with an interested smile. He smiles back shyly and shrugs his shoulders.
"It's my second book."
Her eyes light up and she throws her arms around his neck. He hugs her back just as fiercely and closes his eyes. The fact that she's so excited helps to calm his nerves about her reading it. They break apart and she instantly turns over the red cover. Lucas places his hands over the white page and she pouts.
"Not yet", he says. "Read it later, when you can devote time to it", it comes out as a statement, but they both know it's more of a request. She nods and places it on the kitchen table. She stands and walks over to the stove.
The doors open and close and soon the patter of feet bounce off the walls. "Can you at least tell me what it's about?" she begs before their moment is interrupted.
He raises a brow and considers this. If he tells her the summary it will spoil everything, so instead he gives her the basic need to know stuff. "It's about a scientist and a comet."
She furrows her brows and goes to make a smart comment, but stops when her oldest son flies into the room.
"I thought I was dreaming that", he says loudly as he jumps onto his fathers lap.
The adults lock eyes and Lucas can see her green ones fills with tears. The contact becomes too much for Peyton and she has to turn away. Lucas's eyes linger on her for a moment longer and he sighs softly. He knows this is still hard on her. He knows that she blames herself. He also knows that she shouldn't blame herself at all. Before he can say anything he's interrupted.
"Dada!" his youngest son chirps. He turns his head and smiles at the energetic toddler. He's bouncing up and down on Sam's hip and stretching his arms out in his direction. Peyton walks over and quickly William's attention is diverted.
"Mama!" he yells even louder. Peyton grins and sends Lucas a smarmy look. It was always a constant joke that William was attached to Peyton's hip and even the trial separation hadn't changed that.
"I'm gonna jump in the shower", Sam says with a smile. He winks at Peyton before walking away and the curly blonde smiles appreciatively. He's become her biggest confidant in the recent weeks and because of that he knows just how much time she wants to spend with her family as a family.
"Can we do something today?" Keith asks as he stuffs a fork full of eggs into his mouth. William bounces on Peyton's lap as he shoves a fist full of mushy banana into his little mouth.
Lucas smiles down at Keith and shrugs his shoulders. He looks up and stares at his wife. She's the only woman he's ever considered spending his life with. The only woman he's ever envisioned having children with and as he glances at his two little boys he feels the excitement bubble over at the thought of the third life they've created.
"What do you want to do today, Mom?' Lucas asks with a smile. She grins back and can feel the tears prick her eyes. She internally blames it on her hormones, but it's not that. She's truly happy that her family is whole again. She looks around the half decorated house and nods her head; silently agreeing to her thoughts.
"I think we should get a Christmas tree", she says with a smile.
Are the wonders of my world
Are the wonders of my world
Are the wonders of this world
Are the wonders of my world
"Alright Ms. Davis", Jake says with a smirk. "What would the perfect tree entail?"
Despite herself Brooke lets a soft laugh escape her lips. They've been to two other tree lots so far and nothing has fit her description of perfect. She can't really explain it either. She'll just know. When she told Jake this earlier he laughed until he realized that she was serious.
"I told you already", she says with a huff. "I'll just know", she shrugs her shoulders for good measure and Jake laughs again.
Jenny pulls on his hand and when he looks down at her she's shaking her head and wagging her small pointer finger at him. If she's learned anything in her time from knowing Brooke it's that you don't mess with something she 'just knows'. He nods his head and smiles, ending their silent conversation with a promise to stop getting under the brunette's skin.
He lifts his head and watches as Brooke walks over to the row of pine trees. She picks at the branches and from the look on her face he knows that way too many of the needles have fallen off. She purses her lips and furrows her brows.
He can't help but to grin.
The only reason he pokes fun at her so often is because of the reaction he gets from her. Flustered and Brooke Davis hardly go in the same sentence, but even he knows that when it's the two of them all bets are off. They bring out things in each other that nobody else has been able to; ever.
"How's those look?" Jenny asks as she pulls her hand from her fathers and runs in the direction of Brooke. She shakes her head and tilts her hand to the side; hiding her smile as Jenny watches in horror at the amount of pine needles that fall from her hand.
"That won't do", she says simply.
Jake reaches them in time to hear this sentence leave his daughters mouth and he has to take a second to compose himself. Her words and her stance are so similar to Brooke's that he has to blink in eyes to see if this moment is real. His brown eyes float to Brooke and he knows she's doing the same thing.
It apparently hasn't mattered that he's numerously told Brooke about the impression she's made on Jenny; it's taken an instant like this to truly make her see it.
She shakes her head and smiles softly. "No Jen, that won't do", she agrees in an exact fashion. The small blonde smiles at Brooke's agreement and before either of them can stop her; she's off in search of the perfect tree.
"Now that was scary", Brooke mutters after she skips away. Jake furrows his brows and meets her eyes. He can see the happiness in them, but they're clouded over with concern.
"Why is that scary?" he asks with genuine interest.
She scoffs and waits for him to laugh because he knows the answer. A full minute goes by and he keeps staring, waiting for an answer. To Brooke it's clear;
"I was a slut in high school."
That simple statement sums up everything to her. To Brooke that's who she was, it's something that in her own way will haunt her. In her mind there's no other answer. The brainless slut and Brooke Davis go hand-in-hand.
"You were student body president, you founded DWnotI, you were head of the prom committee, and you started your own business while still in high school."
By the end of his personal list of her accomplishments he's mad. More than mad actually. In the time that they were together he thought he had gotten across to her. He thought he made it clear that she was so much more. She goes to open her mouth, but he's got one last thing to say;
"You became a surrogate mother."
Brooke closes her mouth quickly and she can feel her eyes burn. Those five words mean more to her then almost anything he's ever said to her. She had taken responsibility for Jenny and not because she felt that she had to, but because she had wanted to. The fact that Jake knew that and admired her for it sends her heart into overdrive and all she wants to do is kiss him. But before she can do anything she hears familiar tiny voices and a surprised gasp.
The once inseparable group of friends comes face to face.
I like it in the city when the air is so thick and opaque
I love to see everybody in short skirts, shorts and shades
I like it in the city when two worlds collide
You get the people and the government
Everybody taking different sides
As she sits on the rooftop her eyes drift across the decorated store fronts. This used to be her favorite thing to do in the winter time. Sit on top of the small café with a mug of hot chocolate and admire the little scenes of Christmas rendezvous that played out.
The couple on the ice skating rink. The soon to be parents decorating the tree. The elderly couple leaving Church after midnight mass. The children sitting on the floor while their father reads them The Night before Christmas and their mother brings a fresh plate of cookies out to them all.
The door creaks open and her silence is disturbed. She hears the shuffle of footsteps and soon enough each boy is on either side. They sit in the silence and let the mood take over. They haven't been around each other in weeks and this should probably feel forced or awkward, but it doesn't.
Lucas opens his mouth and begins their typical pastime. Something that Jake and Lucas did at the reception a month ago. Tell their secret and wait for a response.
"Peyton doesn't think I find her attractive."
Haley and Jake share a glance and they both raise their brows. The fact that their curly blonde friend feels this way is a shock. Lucas has only ever had eyes for her. It didn't matter who was around or who was looking at him. His eyes were always on her. As if hearing their thoughts he speaks again;
"After everything that happened with Amy, I don't blame her for it, but at the same time I don't know how to show her that it's not true."
"Take her out on a date", Jake offers. He knows Peyton isn't exactly the romantic type, but every woman likes to feel like the spark is still there.
"Show her that you find her attractive", Haley offers. Although the images of her best friend and sister-in-law will haunt her, she loves them both so much that she'll do anything to see them happy. "Even if she's in sweats, tell her that she's gorgeous. Kiss her when she least expects it. Make her swoon", Haley says as she thinks about all the things any woman would enjoy.
Lucas leans forward and looks to Jake. The brunette nods his head in agreement and Lucas leans back. They're right and he knows this, but he's tried to be romantic and passionate. She simply doesn't want it.
Jake sighs as the silence fills the air once more. Thoughts mull over in his mind and he clears his throat. Lucas and Haley both turn their eyes to him. He opens his mouth and speaks;
"Brooke and I are living together."
At this Haley and Lucas share a chuckle and Jake rolls his eyes. It's the exact response he's expecting.
"We're just friends", he mumbles the same way he mumbled it in high school. Haley laughs and shakes her head.
"You and Brooke do not belong in the same sentence as friends", she says through a chuckle. He narrows his eyes and shakes his head. Leave it to them to try and complicate things. Of course, things are complicated, but he isn't going to tell them that any time soon.
"Yeah, it's like me and Peyton in high school. We tried, but we weren't supposed to be just friends."
Jake closes his mouth as the sentences leave Lucas's mouth. The argument he was about to put forth is moot and he knows it. If Lucas hadn't played the epic romance card he might have had a shot, but he knows he's got nothing now.
Silence lingers once more and Haley's eyes stare down at the stores. She knows they aren't necessarily waiting for her to speak, but it's basically a tradition. Besides, she can't keep her feelings bottled up anymore. And she really can't keep anything from these boys.
"I blame myself for Grace's death."
At this confession she can almost feel the whiplash the boys are sure to have. Their necks snap to the side and even though she doesn't dare to take her eyes off of the store below them she can picture their wide eyes and agape mouths.
"Hales, that's ridiculous", Lucas is the first one to speak.
"Seriously Haley, that wasn't your fault at all", Jake says next.
She smiles sadly and nods her head. She loves them for saying those things and she tells them this, but she also says;
"It isn't something I can help. My body was responsible for nurturing her, for keeping her alive and it couldn't do it. I couldn't do it", a sob rises in her throat and she can instantly feel a hand on either one of hers.
They've spilled their secrets and right now the silence that lingers is exactly what they need. Well, that and the comfort they feel when they're around each other.
Shows that we ain't gonna stand shit
Shows that we are united
Shows that we ain't gonna take it
Shows that we ain't gonna stand shit
Shows that we are united
She sits on the bench over looking the river. The boats that float on top of the still water are decorated for the upcoming holiday. The tiny Christmas lights twinkle and shine brightly. They bounce off the darkness beneath them and cause the waters to glow wonderfully. It's almost like they've always been that way.
She's been entranced by them since she sat down nearly twenty minutes ago. After staring her past in the face her emotions got the better of her and she had to leave. Nobody tried to stop her and she was grateful for it. The stillness that surrounds her fades away as she hears the approaching footsteps.
Too heavy to be a woman. Too purposeful to be Jake. Too hesitant to be her husband.
He sits beside her, but doesn't say a word. There aren't any words that could convey everything he wants to. He's sorry. He's ashamed. He's lonely.
But, not in the sense of actually being alone. It's something that you can only fully understand after you and your best friend lose contact. It's like your other half is gone. Part of your brain is dead. He knows he won't say these things; he isn't even sure he can find his voice right now.
Instead he reaches for her hand.
Her cold fingers rest against his warm skin and they each feel a chill run up their bodies. He waits with unsteady nausea for her to do something, say something. A minute goes by and then another. He's about to pull his hand away when she squeezes his calloused palm gently. That gesture is the only thing he's longed for over the last few weeks.
They've never needed words. They've never had to verbally express the things they wanted to say. Sitting here in the quiet is the only thing they need. They're best friends; this is the only solace they need.
Another moment goes by and their silence is disrupted by the sound of frantic footsteps. They both know who it is and they face each other to roll their eyes.
"Don't you dare roll your eyes!" she warns as she comes to sit beside Nathan. They both chuckle like children and Brooke's mouth is doing all the work.
"I'm sorry for everything that's happened the last month and a half. I'm sorry that I wasn't there for you when I should have been. I'm sorry that I've been a terrible best friend. I'm sorry that I sent friggin' flowers and I'm sorry that I didn't call you when I heard about the rumors. I'm—"
"Brooke!"
They both shout to stop her ramblings. She's always been the opposite when it comes to expressions. Brooke's the queen of rambling and apologizing and she's always needed one of them to stop her from doing it.
"I'm just really sorry", she mumbles as she bows her head slightly.
Peyton rests her head on Nathan's shoulder and Brooke glances in their direction. The brunette boy swiftly reaches for her hand and Brooke gladly accepts the gesture. She follows Peyton's actions and rests her head on his free shoulder. Nathan smiles broadly and kisses the top of their heads.
This was his family when he didn't have one. This will always be his family regardless of where his life takes him. Having these two girls at his side, he's confident that he can overcome anything. As they sigh contently he knows they feel the same way.
Round my hometown
Memories are fresh
Round my hometown
Ooh the people I've met
As Lucas sits on his bed with his hands behind his head he thinks about how completely random this day was. It was long and at most times tedious, but he also reconnected with his best friends. After the two groups had their separate time together they met up and all picked Christmas trees together. It was decided then that they would celebrate the holiday with each other; as any family would. After he and he family got back to the house they set up the tree and the boys quickly fell asleep.
Since then Peyton had been locked away in her art room, reading his novel. So he sat here patiently – as patiently as he could – waiting for his wife to respond to the words he had written.
The floorboards creak and he can feel his body tighten at the suspense. When he sees her silhouette in the doorway he can feel his pulse race. His eyes trace over her body. She's dressed in an old pair of shorts and one of his t-shirts and the sight of that makes him smile.
She walks forward and instead of sitting beside him like he anticipates she straddles his legs and stares into his eyes. They stay like this for what feels like hours and he can see the faint trail of tears along her cheeks and the puffiness to her eyes.
"Did you really think I wasn't going to return?" she asks as she locks her fingers behind his neck.
"I didn't know what to think", he says honestly. "It was the scariest time of my life", he whispers with a hoarse voice.
She leans forward and nuzzles her nose against his. Those words will forever be engrained into her mind and she wants them to stay there. The emotion and passion in which he wrote amazes her. He's so incredibly talented that she's shocked he's still so grounded.
"I'm proud of you", she whispers. He looks at her as she speaks. "I know that I haven't exactly told you so, but I always thought my actions spoke for me."
He knows she's referring to the asinine statement he made the other day on Brooke's porch and he shakes his head. He hadn't meant to say that and he hadn't meant to make her feel bad.
"I am so undeniably proud of you and not just your accomplishments professionally. As a man, as a husband, as a friend, and as a father. I'm so damn proud of you", she whispers before kissing him passionately.
He responds immediately. His tongue pushes past her lips and meets hers in a moment of ecstasy. Hands are everywhere and they both relish in the feeling. She grinds forward and he lets out a groan. Her hands push against his chest and soon enough their lips are separated and they're gasping for air.
"I love you", she says breathlessly. He grins and kisses her gently.
"I have always loved you", he responds.
The words are enough to intensify the ache she feels. She isn't ready to be with him intimately yet, but she can tell that he's been more then ready for a few days. She bites her lip and drags her hands along his torso. She can see him physically shake and her movements pick up. Before either of them can stop it her hands are pulling at the elastic waist of his flannel bottoms.
As she shimmies them down his legs her body follows. He's completely lost in the moment; head thrown back, hand in her curls, eyes shut tightly. He wants this, he needs this. Her lips are warm against his body and his hips buck involuntarily. She pauses and it's only for a moment, but he's brought back to their current situation.
"Wait", he says painfully. He brings his head forward and meets her confused eyes. He grunts in anger before pulling on her arms so that their faces are level.
"I don't want to rush into anything", she gives him a coy little smile that goes against the nervousness she feels. She was ready to do this for him. She was ready to take that next step because he's been so patient and kind and the fact that he's refusing this strikes a cord.
It's like she's being rejected.
She knows it's ridiculous to feel this way, but she can't help it. Given everything that's happened . . . she suddenly feels awkward. Lucas places his finger under her chin and forces her to look at him.
"I don't not want you. I want you more then I think I've ever wanted you, but I want this to be special. I want to sort through any other issues we have and I want you to feel comfortable."
"I'm sorry", she says softly. He shakes his head and pulls her against his body.
"What do you want for Christmas?" he asks even though he's gotten her a present. She's silent for a minute and when she answers he's taken by surprise.
"Snow", she says simply. He repeats her answer and she chuckles silently.
"Remember when I told you about that snow day in sixth grade? Well, I want that again. I want to feel safe and secure. I want everything to stay exactly the same, even if it's only for that moment."
He can hear her voice quiver and he squeezes her delicately. They lay down, with her on top of him and he soothingly rubs her back. Her eyes grow heavy and eventually her breaths are even.
He hugs her closer, as close as he possibly can without crushing her. Her hot breath tickles his neck and the sensation makes him smile. He knows she feels guilty and awkward, but she shouldn't. And he's going to show her that. He's only got a few days left.
Are the wonders of my world
Are the wonders of my world
Are the wonders of this world
Are the wonders of my world
I hope the wait was slightly worth it. Let me know what you think!