Operation: Recovery
Chapter 21: Headaches and Heartbreaks

Needless to say, neither of us recovered that idea of taking our relationship easy. I don't think either of us left that room for the next couple of days. Whenever we got hungry we'd having something brought to the room. Between the half a bottle of rotgut I had and the beer Eve had sitting in the fridge we were set for a while. Those days sort of ran together; we'd do whatever we wanted, whenever we wanted whether that was having sex or watching T.V. or whatever. On the third day we ran out of booze and Eve and I agreed we needed more. We walked down to the nearest liquor store (about five blocks west) and brought back more than enough to last us for a while.

It was on the fourth day of living like this that I noticed something change in Eve. At first I thought it was just her coming down from the high from all of the beer and sex. That night as we lay in bed I asked her if anything was wrong but she just shook her head and said,

"No, everything's great. It's perfect." Then she kissed me gently and rolled over before falling asleep. I slept poorly that night, but the next day everything seemed to be back to way it had been, and it remained that way for several more days. I thought things were back on track; that Eve and I would be together and that our relationship could only get better in the coming days. Boy was I wrong.

One morning I woke up and my head hurt even worse than usual so I blindly made my way out of the bedroom and into the bathroom where I took enough of the pills to ease my pain. I stood in the bathroom for a second, curiously aware of the fact that the shower wasn't running (Eve had every morning before gotten up before me and got a shower before I woke up). I shrugged as I made my way back to the bedroom. I stopped in the doorway for a second, blinking hard in the light coming in from the window.

"Hey Eve, why aren't," I stopped as my vision cleared and I realized the room was empty. Curiously I looked into the living area and found no sign of Eve there before checking the bathroom; she wasn't there either. I shrugged to myself and assumed she'd gone out for one reason or another. I walked back into the bedroom where I noticed a data tablet sitting on the pillow next to mine. A note was scrawled on it in quick, jerky handwriting but I could read every word perfectly:

Matt,

I'm sure you've noticed by now that I'm missing and, I hate writing this but I'm not coming back. A few days ago I realized something; our relationship'll never work out, not with me being stuck on Katina and you constantly moving around. I knew our fun would have to end Sooner or later and rather than put you through the heartbreak of watching me go and knowing there was nothing you could do to stop it, I thought it was better to leave while you were sleeping. I wasn't lying when I said that everything was great, perfect, whatever. This has been the best week of my life and I'll never forget it. I hope eventually you'll be able to forgive me.

Eve

I dropped the tablet as its words reached my brain. Quickly I threw on my clothes and rushed down to the front desk.

"Where did she go?" I asked the man behind it.

"I assure you sir I have no idea what you are talking about." He said.

"Damn it cut the bullshit and tell me where Eve went!" I shouted, pounding on the desk. The man jerked back, obviously frightened.

"I do not know!" He managed to stammer. "She paid for the room this morning, saying that you were going to stay one more night and that I should just charge the rent from the same account. She did not say anything about where she was going I swear!" I wanted to think the whiney idiot was lying to me, that Eve had just gone to get something to eat or any other illogical reasons but deep down I knew he was telling the truth. Quietly I thanked the man and returned to the room. I picked up the tablet with the note, considered throwing it in the garbage or against the wall but instead just tucked it under my arm. I picked up what little else belonged to me, got ready to leave but stopped as I reached the door. I stood there with my back pressed against it for some time, staring at the living room and the bedroom, before finally I convinced myself to leave.

I remember wandering the streets until late that night. Eventually I found my way back to the Savannah where I tossed the tablet and the rest of my belongings into the trunk in front of my bunk. My brain asked what there was to do now, but my feet seemed to know as they trudged back outside, through the spaceport and across a busy road to the one bar I knew from experience that I could drown my sorrows at without anyone noticing or caring. I stopped a second as I reached my destination. I looked up at a dull metal sign lit up by a light above it and read the familiar name, "The Aviator's Club", before opening the glass door. I allowed the waves of cigarette smoke to wash over me and cringed slightly as the sound of pool balls crashing into one another and people talking and laughing loudly, drowning out the rock music blasting out from several speakers scattered around the bar, hit me. I allowed the door to slam shut as I stepped inside where a burly bouncer asked me if I wouldn't mind if he checked me for weapons. After being patted down I was allowed into the main room that made up a majority of the Aviator's Club. Through the smoke and low lighting I would've found it difficult to pick my way through the mass of chairs and tables separating the entrance from the bar at the opposite end of the room hadn't I been in there so many times before. Carefully I picked my way through a row of metallic tables and past booths with similar motifs set into the walls as I made my way toward the back. I stopped as I reached an empty stool in front of the bar and looked to my right, noting the staircase leading up to where the bar's numerous pool and card tables were. I considered going upstairs for a second to see if there was anyone I recognized but in the end decided against it. Instead I sat down and immediately dove into my first drink.

I guess in the end it didn't matter that I didn't go looking for anyone; they found me instead. As I was finishing off my second beer a hand appeared on my shoulder and I turned around to find Duke standing behind me, a grin on his face.

"I'd ask where you've been Captain, but I'm pretty sure I can guess." He said. I stared back at him blankly, too busy trying to drown out any feelings I had left in cheap beer to care about the words coming out of his mouth. "Guess you couldn't resist eh? You and Eve must've been having all kinds of fun the past couple of days, why else would you just disappear like that?" Duke looked around quickly before asking, "Where is Eve anyway? I figured with as close as you wanted to get with her you would've brought her along with you."

"She's gone," I said before turning back around. I motioned to the bar tender to give me another beer. I didn't need to be looking at Duke to tell my words had puzzled him.

"Gone?" He repeated. "Where'd she go?"

"Hell if I know," I said, returning to my alcohol.

About halfway through my third beer the person to my right got up. I probably wouldn't have noticed if Vivian hadn't sat down a moment later.

"Haven't seen you in a while." She said as the bartender sat a beer down in front of her.

"Ditto," I said. Vivian waited a moment, expecting me to continue but, when I didn't she added,

"Duke said he saw you sitting over here by your sorry lonesome self and I figured you could do with a little company."

"I'll pass," I said, continuing to do my best to ignore her.

"What's got you in such a bad mood?" she asked. I slammed my beer down and turned to her. I tried desperately to keep control but the alcohol helped my anger along until I had no choice but to unleash it upon one of the few people I really cared about.

"You wanna know the problem is?" I shouted, my voice somehow louder than anything else in the bar. "Eve's gone Vivian! That's what's got me in such a bad mood, okay? I really thought we could have something special but instead, nope! We got drunk, we fucked each other's brains out, then she disappeared in the middle of the night for who fucking knows where and who fucking knows why! So yeah, I'm just a little pissed that the woman I put my life in danger for just left me. Not that you care."

"What?" Vivian asked.

"Don't play dumb," I said, returning to my drink. "I haven't seen you in a week and why? Probably because you were doing the exact same thing Eve did to me. You found some random guy, fucked him then left him high and dry because women are all coldhearted bitches." Vivian stared at me, a complete loss for words, stun written all over her face. That didn't last long though.

"You know what Captain?" She said, rising from her seat and picking up her beer. "I just realized you still owe me a few drinks so here," cold shock hit me as Vivian dumped the last of her beer over my head before slamming the empty bottle down in front of me before leaning close and whispering "this one's on you." I sat frozen in my seat as I watched her storm off towards the exit.

"Wow," Duke said, appearing behind me. "I don't know what you said but damn did you tick her off." I continued to sit in silence before finally asking,

"What the hell just happened?"

"Well Vivian just poured a beer on your head after, and I'm just guessing here, you told her to fuck off," he said. "What exactly did you say to her?" I thought and every word remained fresh in my mind. I moaned before placing my head in my hands.

"Why did I say…?" I thought out loud.

"Yeah it doesn't help that she was coming over here to tell you…" Duke stopped, taunting me with some secret knowledge he had.

"Tell me what?" I asked.

"Nah, it's not my place to tell you," he said. I grabbed the collar of his shirt in my hands, wrenching his face closer to mine.

"Tell me what, Duke?" I asked.

"That she has the hots for you Captain, what else?" he said, grinning. I let go of his collar.

"You're shitting me," I said in stunned disbelief. He took a second to smooth out his shirt before answering.

"Maybe," he said. "Just call it a hunch." I looked from him to the exit before launching out of my seat. I heard the bartender tell me I hadn't paid yet but I didn't care. I ran past the bouncer and through the door into the night air. Quickly I looked left and right for any sign of Vivian but no dice. I sighed, leaning up against the bar's windowless exterior as I tried to think what to do next. A soft sound, the sound of someone crying, reached my ears and they perked up. I followed it around the side of the bar and down an alley where in the dark I could just make out someone standing, their face buried in their hands. Quietly I approached them, stopping a foot or so away.

"Vivian?" I asked. Sure enough it was my squadmate. She looked up at the sound of my voice before growling.

"Go away." She said. "You obviously don't want to see me, why the hell should I want to see your ugly mug?" Cautiously I backed way a step.

"I'm sorry for what I said. I've just had a rough day." I tried to explain.

"Who the hell can blame you?" She shouted, tears still running down her face. "You just got rejected by the girl of your dreams! It's not like I have any idea what that's like!"

"So he was right," I said.

"Who?" She asked.

"Duke said you had… feelings for me," I muttered.

"Oh, really?" Vivian said. "Well congratulations Captain! It took someone else to point something incredibly obvious to you! Well done!"

"What?" I asked. "How was it obvious?"

"Gee, I don't know," Vivian said, thinking. "Between watching out for your hide all the time, hanging out with you every time we went to a bar, and dropping some blatant hints anyone with half a brain would've noticed it some time ago!"

"What're you…?" I started to say but then things came rushing back to me: the way she'd visited me in the medical bay while everyone else was sleeping, the fact that she'd rushed down to save my butt on Zoness when no one was willing to, and the things she said just in the past couple of weeks alone: "I'd follow you into the heart of the sun if you asked me to." The whole time I just thought she was being a good friend.

"You know why what you said in there hurt so bad?" She asked. "Women aren't coldhearted bitches, guys are just manipulative bastards. The truth about my sex life, there isn't one. I was never into hooking up with guys for random sex, it felt wrong. Every guy I've ever gotten into what I thought was a serious relationship with would always in the end try to pressure me into sleeping with him and when I turned him down he'd dump me. Do you get it now Matt? What you said in there couldn't be further from the truth. Some people might be in it for the sex but not me! All I wanted was love." Tears started to roll down her cheeks again and Vivian turned away from me, doing her best to stop them. Hesitantly I stepped closer.

"Vivian I…"

"Matt we're gonna be late!"

Matt looked up from the tablet he'd been writing on as Vivian appeared in the barrack's door.

"Just give me one more minute." He said, turning back to it. Vivian rolled her eyes and walked towards him.

"You didn't steal more of Duke's magazines did you?" She asked. Quickly she snatched it away from him.

"Hey!"

"I swear you'll owe me big time for…" Vivian stopped as she read the words on the tablet. "Matt, what is…?"

"I figured someone had to write what actually happened two months ago," he said standing up. Vivian scrolled through the digital pages of Matt's journal.

"Is everything here?" Matt thought about it for a second before shaking his head.

"As much as I can remember," he said as Vivian handed the tablet back to him.

"Is there something you can't?" She asked quietly.

"Nothing that had to do with the mission," Matt said. Frowning, he added, "At this point I don't think I'll ever remember most of my childhood."

"You know the government'll never let that see the light of day right?" Vivian said, trying to change the subject. Matt sighed.

"I know," he said. "It's just. I feel like someone should write down what actually happened, even if it is skewed by an idiot Major." Vivian smiled.

"You might be an idiot Major, but you're my major idiot," she said, wrapping her arms around his waist. Matt allowed the silence of the room to envelop them before tilting Vivian's head towards his and kissing her. They smiled at one another before Vivian brought reality crashing back in on them,

"Now come on," she said, taking the tablet back away from him and tossing it into the trunk in front of his bunk. "You're the one who promised his parents he'd see them one more time before we lifted off and tonight's our last night of shore leave."

"Right and you're coming along with me because you want to make sure you hear every embarrassing story you can to hold over my head," Matt said. Vivian grinned.

"I'm coming with you," she said, taking his hand in hers, "because I'm never letting you leave my side again."

END