Bittersweet 20:
Quil sat in the hospital bed that he had abandoned just a few hours previously in an attempt to kill Bella, his alpha's imprint. He was still trying to wrap his brain around the details of what the others had informed him after the spell had been broken due to Victoria's death.
It seemed hard to imagined that "magic" that harmed others truly existed. He knew the very fact that he transformed into a wolf, a massive size wolf was magic in a different form but to consider the idea that someone could create magical spells that took over another person's thoughts and actions truly scared the shit out of him.
He had refused the offer to go home once the Dr. had checked him over and agreed he was well enough to go home. He had even suggested to Jake to have him locked up until they could be one hundred percent sure the spell had truly vanished along with the remains of Victoria. He did not dare want to risk hurting anyone else.
Sue agreed he could stay another night just to be on the safe side but she felt that the spell was definitely no longer intact due to the death of Victoria. However the wolves also decided to take turns keeping a close eye on him. He would be on constant surveillance until they could all rest assure he was back to his normal self once again.
"How is Bella?" Quil asked as he sipped on the cold ice water that Paul had gone off to get for him while flirting with a blonde nurse that he swore he could bang if he did not have to be on baby sitting duty tonight.
"Not sure." Paul shrugged his shoulders as he flipped through the magazine.
"Shouldn't you go check?" Quil chewed on the corner of his lip. He would not feel relaxed until he knew that Bella was not going to die or worse turn into a vampire. He knew that Jake would kill him if either situation occurred.Quil would not dare even put up a hand to stop him. This was all his fault and he knew it.
"Are you kidding me? Look, I am not leaving here until Jared gets here." Paul snorted as he flashed Quil a look that clearly stated he did not trust Quil.
"Okay." Quil sighed as he laid his back on the pillow without muttering another word for the remainder of Paul's time with him.
Opening his phone he dialed Sam's number. He wondered if Sam had learned anything about Collin's status. He had Paul staying with Quil while Sam was sent to the Hotel to keep a close eye on Collin.
"Hello." Jake was relieved that Sam answered after one ring.
"How is it going?" Jake asked.
"Fine. You know Paul said he had been moaning and screaming when he was here earlier but all I have heard him do since I arrive is snore. I peeped in the window and he is still in human form." Sam answered with relief clearly in his voice.
"Good. Maybe he was just sick after all." Jake hoped like hell that was the case. The thought of Collin becoming a member of the pack would make his life even more difficult than it already was.
"Alright, in about an hour have Leah take over. Sue is going to watch over Lizzie while I stay here with Bella." Jake ordered.
"Sounds good. I need to go check on Em." Sam replied.
Jake felt awful. He had nearly forgotten about Emily's part in all of this. He knew Sam would feel much better once he was near his wife and son.
"Good." Jake hung up the phone. Standing there for a few a more minutes trying to catch his breathe and feel less guilty for the lies he had told Bella.
******************************************'
Carlisle did not like the way Edward looked. He seemed to be jumping at the bit ever since he had tasted Bella Swan's blood. Edward confessed that her blood was unlike anything he had ever had before. It was so intoxicating. Rich. Vibrant. He had seen so many things. It was like he had seen her own memories. This was not part of the normal process. When they fed they never saw any visions. It was just the taste of the blood, the smell of it, the rhythm of the heartbeat that engulfed them during feeding. No visions. Nothing ever. So why had he seen things when he suck the poison out of her?
"I'm fine Carlisle." Edward snickered as he opened up a book that he had read a million times before. He knew that everyone was watching him for a sign of blood thirst.
"No your not." Carlisle snickered back as he sat down next to him.
"How can you say that? I am the mind reader not you." Edward joked.
"I don't have to have the gift to know that something is deeply bothering you. Talk to me." Carlisle pleaded.
"Fine." Edward caved in.
"It's just that when I took her blood, I saw things." Edward decided to spill the truth to Carlisle. He would be the only one with answers after all.
"What sort of things?" Carlisle relaxed. He was afraid that Edward was going to admit to wanting to hunt down every human he could get his teeth into.
"It was like her memories. I saw her as a child, then as a teenager. Then I saw her wedding day. She was so beautiful all in white. Then suddenly I felt her emotions. I could feel the fear and hope in her as she look at her groom." Edward explained as he sat the book down in his lap, running his hands through his messy hair.
"That is odd, indeed." Carlisle was surprised to say the least. In all of his earlier years of feeding on humans he had never once gone through a similar situation as Edward was describing to him.
"Odd? More like freaky as hell." Edward gritted his teeth as the memories flooded his brain. The human emotions that he had forgot to feel began to rush through his blood. The way she had cried over the loss of her child crushed his soul. The pain she had endured at the thought of never holding her daughter, never looking into her open eyes was so worse than being shot.
"Edward, relax. Take a deep breathe." Carlisle watched as Edward jerked around.
"The pain, it hurts. It seems to be almost killing me." Edward explained as he covered his face with his hands.
"I will call Irene. She could possibly erase these memories for you. I'm not sure if it will work on vampires but since these memories are from a human maybe it could work." Carlisle suggested as he squeezed his sons' shoulders.
"NO! I don't want Irene near me." Edward cried out furiously.
Carlisle had forgotten about the past that Edward had shared with her for a few years before they had moved away. Irene had been heartbroken when Edward had rejected her offer to be his true mate. She swore they were meant to be together but Edward disagreed with it, saying that when he look at her he saw a friend, not a lover.
"Fine. But if it gets worse you will just have to face your demons. I won't let you suffer like this." Carlisle warned him as he nodded at Emmett who had entered the room relieving Carlisle.
"So, human blood uh. Was it as good as you remembered?" Emmett asked curiously as he turn on the television.
"No. It was better." Edward confessed as he closed his eyes hoping the images would simply fade as the days went by. Once her blood was out of his system then maybe he would be cure of these overwhelming human emotions.
Bella sat up in the bed with two large frighten eyes. She glanced around the room with a nervous face.
"Hey, your awake." Jake stood up, moving swiftly to her side. Holding her hand in his he pulled it up to his lips, kissing it gently.
"Am I?" Bella wondered if this was another nightmare.
"Yes, you are." Jake wondered just how much she would remember. How much he would still be able to protect her from? He wanted to tell her the truth. The whole truth but not here, not in this place.
"What the hell to happened to me Jake?" Bella demanded as she slipped her hand out of his. Turning her wrist over she saw the bandage that covered it. She knew that the dream of being bitten by some crazy ass psycho bitch had been real. She thought about the pain that had followed the bite. It had been worse than giving birth.
"Umm…well…" Jake ran his hand through his hair nervously trying to figure out just where to start.
"Why in the hell did one of your friends take me to her?" Bella recalled the crazy woman telling her that Jake's friend, close friend, brought her to the woman.
"Quil was not quite himself." Jake chewed on his lip as he watched her closely.
"Quil? The one who got knock out. The one here at the hospital." Bella was not sure what she had done exactly to piss this guy off but she was going to kick his ass once she was out of here.
"Yes." Jake nodded his head.
"Why? Why would he take me to some crazy bitch to bite me?" Bella shouted furiously.
"I don't know." Jake lied through his teeth.
"Well, I want him arrested." Bella snarled.
Jake was shocked. He had never seen her lose her temper like this before. He also had not seen her going in this direction in regards to Quil.
"Honey, it was the hit on his head, you see he was not himself.' Jake defended Quil's actions.
Bella's eyes widen with fury.
"HE. WAS. NOT. HIMSELF. Are you kidding me Jake? He kidnapped me and gave me to some crazy woman to kill me. She had every intention of killing me Jake. I was alone, scared and where was Quil? Uh? He just dump me over to her and ran away." Bella's voice grew so loud that it was not long before a nurse stepped in to check on her patient.
"I see your awake." She stated the obvious as she glared at Jake.
"Yes." Bella began to calm down. She did not want to make a scene in front of the stranger.
"How is my daughter?" Bella directed the question to the nurse, ignoring Jake's presences entirely.
"She is great. She is such a beautiful girl. She will want to see you. If your better today you can get up and go see her." The nurse offered as she wrote down Bella's vitals.
"Good. I need to see her." Bella laid back against the pillow trying to make sense of the crazy ordeal she had experience earlier in the day.
"After you eat we will get you a chair to go see her." The nurse agreed.
The nurse gave Jake a look that warn him if he kept upsetting her patient she would have him removed.
Once the nurse was gone Bella finally turn to look at Jake.
"I'm sorry Jake but that was one of the most scariest moments of my life. I just need…just go please. I want to go to sleep." Bella sobbed as she rolled over on her side away from his view.
Jake felt tears stinging the back of his eyes. He knew he had failed her. It had been his job to protect her, and he failed her.
Walking out of the room without looking at her he waited until he got around the corner before he let the tears slip out the corner of his eyes.
Alice stood next to Jasper as they watched the bear crawl up the mountainside. They both knew they could take it easily enough without help from the other but Jasper had insisted they feed together.
When their appetites were appeased they sat up on a tree limb staring out at the beautiful view before them.
"What is bothering you?" Jasper ask.
"The vision I had today at the hospital showed me that more trouble lies ahead for Bella. The Volturi will come even though we killed Victoria." Alice confessed.
"Damn. When did our lives start getting some complicated?" Jasper asked with a sarcastic smile.
"Not sure. I just know that Edward is going to save Bella. I am afraid for him." Alice continued with the details of her vision.
"Why are you afraid for him?" Jasper knew that Alice also had good intuition. She might not see all the details but she often felt trouble before it happen.
"I think he is going to be bonded to Bella somehow. Maybe from saving her today or from saving her again later." Alice explained as she stroked his cheek lovingly, staring into his eyes with despair.
"Is that a bad thing?" Jasper ask.
"Yes, it is. You see Bella belongs to Jake not Edward. Edward is going to lose no matter what he tries." Alice snorted as her eyes revealed the pain she already felt for her brother before the events had already taken place.
Bella laughed as Lizzie tried to sing with Bella. She was feeling much better now that she was alone with her daughter. It was crazy how Jake and Sue both seemed frightened of leaving her alone in the same room with Lizzie. She used her stern voice to make them both listen to her and leave at once.
Crawling up in the bed next to Lizzie, she felt more at peace. She felt like she was finally able to breathe again. The fear that she had experienced earlier today seem like a lifetime ago.
She knew it was unfair of her to direct her anger and fears at Jake but he was there and he was defending the actions of his friend. She felt like he was on Quil's side and not hers. She also knew he was lying to her about something. She could not explain it but she felt it. She felt his hesitation with each word he addressed to her.
It hurt her that they were at this point in their relationship that he could not trust her enough. She knew that he cared about her. She knew he was attracted to her. She just wasn't sure where they stood at this point. She also did not know where she stood with her own feelings toward him after this mornings nightmare.
Picking up the phone she dialed her parents number. It was time to tell them where she was, about Lizzie and above all let them know she was still alive so far.
"I'm truly sorry Jake." Quil was weeping as his Alpha stood over him with his arms across his chest glaring furiously at him.
"I know." Jake said simply. He knew it was not entirely Quil's fault for happen today. No one could have predicted that when Victoria had attacked Quil she had also somehow put a spell on him.
"Do you think she ever forgive me? And Emily, dear God." Quil covered his face as hot tears streamed down his face. He was so ashamed of his actions.
"Stop it. Seriously. Come on dude you're a man. Act like one." Jake heard the roughness of his own voice and knew hew as being an ass due to his own hatred of himself. He too had cried earlier. He knew that tears would not change anything.
"Okay." Quil swallowed hard as he wiped away the tears.
"Quil, you just have to understand we will have to watch you closely and don't act all angry about it." Jake warned him of what lied ahead for him with the rest of the pack.
"Okay." Quil nodded his head eagerly.
"Good. Now I have to go check in with Leah." Jake sighed heavily as he made his way out of the room. Calling Leah he hoped she would give him the same news that Sam had given him earlier about Collin's condition. He was not in the mood to deal with a transformation of a new wolf member. Especially not when it pertain to Collin Brady. He feared that once Collin learn that Bella was here in town, with him, it would be just the sort of thing to set him off if indeed he was destined to become one of them.
Bella slept soundly that night. She felt like a heavy burden had been lifted off of her weary shoulders after she confided in her parents about everything that had been going on since her quick departure. She knew how shocked they were with all the news she was giving them.
She had manage to convince them to give her some more time with Lizzie before they dare spoke a word to Collin about any of this. It had helped that she had threaten to leave the state with Lizzie if they broke their promise. Not that she would but they were unsure of their daughter's mental condition at the moment.
She knew she had one more big task in front of her. She had to tell Collin. Her parents would never forgive her for holding back such special news that involved him. They might no longer love one another the same but he was her father. Her own father had stated how disappointed he would be in her if she did not do the right thing, the moral thing.
Bella knew they did not understand her fears when it came to Collin. They still saw him as a decent guy who screwed up. They had no clue the possibilities of the sort of pain he could cause not only for Lizzie but for Jake. In fact they were not pleased that she had been staying with Jake for this long. They agreed he was a good man for taking such good care of Lizzie due to the circumstances of his situation but they felt it was only right that he give up all his rights to Bella immediately. It was that point in the conversation that she felt the heat of anger boil up inside of her.
She lashed out at her parents. She warned them they were clueless to how it felt to have your child ripped away from you. She also reminded them that Lizzie was her daughter, it was her right to make decisions pertaining to Lizzie and not them. They finally settled down and agreed to let it go.
After Bella hung up with them she played more with Lizzie until she had finally passed out for the night. Slipping back into her room she saw she was alone again. She was not sure how that made her feel exactly. Relieved, angry, or disappointed.
She knew that she had been mean toward Jake. She knew she had insisted he leave her alone. She knew that he was only trying to respect her wishes but a small part of her wished that he had fought just a little harder to stay by her side.
It had not been lost on her how once she left the Lizzie's room she had spied Paul suddenly appearing across from her door. Why were they guarding Lizzie's room? Did they fear that Quil might actually hurt Lizzie too? Something was not right about any of this. Once they got home she was going to demand some answers from Jake.
Sienna stood in the shower letting the hot water sting her skin. She closed her eyes trying to recall how she got home. She could remember running from something or someone. She found herself staring around in her room looking at the familiar surrounding with a feeling of loss.
When her parents discovered she was home they were more than overjoyed to have her home with them. She managed to calm them down enough to request they leave Forks. She was still not sure why but it felt important enough for her to insist they go away for awhile. When they finally came to an agreement her father had left to go see their travel agency to get tickets.
Afterwards she had gone up to her room to take a shower. She felt dirty somehow. Washing her body until it was nearly raw she still did not feel clean. Opening her closet she looked at the beautiful wardrobe before her. She was a lucky girl. Her parents had never left her wanting for nothing. Except one thing. Jake.
She closed her eyes bringing forth his image. She saw his eyes sparkle as he look at her. She began to remember how soft his lips felt pressed against hers. The way he always manage to make her feel special. Opening her eyes she reminded herself that the life they once had was over. Gone. No more. She had made some difficult choices and now she had to live with them.
Picking a outfit she slipped it on feeling a little less ugly inside. Twirling in the mirror she wondered if Jake had found his happiness yet? Would he reunite with his imprint someday? Would he ever learn the truth about Lizzie? Knowing she was leading her thoughts down a one way street she covered her chest with her arms and began to block out the painful memories.
Opening her door she slipped back down the stairs and into the safety of her parents home. She knew there was a chance that with their help she would find love again and above all manage to stay out of trouble for a change.
Collin woke up startled. His chest was heavy. His heart was racing. He still felt like hell. Sweat soaked into his clothes. Stretching his legs he found them to ache as if he had worked out all day.
Pushing himself out of the bed he made his way to the bathroom. Opening the door he looked at the shower with such desire. He just wanted to feel cold water against his body. He was burning up. He was sick to his stomach. Turning the knob to the coldest degree he fumbled with his wet sticky clothing until he was completely naked.
Stepping under the cold spray of water he thought for a moment he might find some ease to the pain that had engulfed his body all day.
Leaning against the wall of the shower he felt his legs growing weaker as he slid down until his bottom sat on the cold tiles underneath him. The water cool him off but it did nothing for the rest of the pain that was gnawing at the pit of his stomach.
Covering his face with his hands he felt the muscles underneath his skin literally shift. It was like something was growing inside of him. He knew it was just the sickness making his brain think such outrageous thoughts.
Feeling his body temperature dropping he finally found the strength to pull himself back up.
Grabbing a towel off the counter he wrapped his body with it before collapsing back on the bed, face first.
He wished he had away to contact someone, anyone from the outside of this room. He feared he might be sicker than he first suspected. What if he died here, alone? How many days would he lie in here dead and forgotten? Would Bella learn of his death in time to go to his funeral? Would she care that he had gone off to be with their daughter? Would she miss him or would she envy him?
Tears leaked from his eyes as he brought up the image of her face. It made him smile. She was the only good thing he had ever experienced in his life. She was also the only person he regretted hurting. He had let her down. He had let go of the only true love he would ever know because he was too damn weak to face the loss of his child head on.
Now he would pay the price for his stupidity and fears. He would die alone. The pain began to send tremors through out his entire body. He felt like metal claws were sinking into his skull as he slip into the darkness of what he fear was death.