The surrender patch had been in Clara's purse for two weeks and it was driving her crazy. She just didn't what to do. Deep down she knew it was wrong but so tempting.
Originally her plan was to use it on the Doctor convince him guilt free sex was possible and hopefully he'd come around to trying Dr. Saxon's tips but every time she attempted it she choked.
Needing someplace to think she found herself at the local coffee shop trying to figure out what to do when she heard a female voice break into her thoughts. "Excuse me, my sugar container's empty could I borrow yours'?"
She glanced up at a young dark skinned female Doctor; her tag read Martha Jones M.D.
Clara immediately recognized the name from the Doctor. "You're Martha Jones, aren't you?"
The young woman nodded. "Yes, why?" "I'm Clara Oswald; I travel with the Doctor, now." She replied. Martha smiled and pulled up a seat beside her. "Oh, right he's told me about you. How is the Doctor?"
She scoffed softly. "Well, other than messing up his regeneration he's fine." Martha smirked stirring her tea. "Yeah, my husband Mickey told me about that. So what's it's like having a newly regenerated Doctor with a previous face?"
Clara blew into her cup. "Well, to be honest there are some differences but he's pretty much the same person."
She nodded. "I'm just glad he's doing alright."
"Yeah." Clara said staring at her cup.
Martha noticed she seemed distracted. "Is something bothering you?" Clara shrugged and muttered something that sounded like "I guess."
Martha sighed "What is it?"
She glanced at her curious. "Martha when you traveled with the Doctor did you ever want to be with him?"
Martha nodded slowly. "Yeah, in fact I was in love with him," She looked at Clara. "Why, are you…?"
Clara shook her head. "No, no we're just friends but we have…done things." She admitted sheepishly. She looked at her slightly clueless. "What things?" Clara gave her a knowing look and Martha finally understood what she meant. Her mouth dropped. "Oh, you're kidding!"
Clara blushed now slightly embarrassed about saying anything.
"But aren't you with some bloke named Danny?" She asked. Clara shrank back in her seat."Yeah but somehow I've kind of made a mess of things."
"Blimey, I know he's a different man every regeneration but this is ridiculous. This just doesn't sound like him at all. How did this happen?" She said.
Clara softly groaned briefly covering her face. "I don't know. The first time was when Danny and I broke up the second was when he thought I wasn't with Danny anymore but I didn't bother correcting him until afterwards."
Martha nodded rubbing her eyes. "Okay, answer me this are you still sleeping with him?"
"No." She replied. Martha breathed a sigh of relief. "That's good." "But I sort of want to." Clara added. "Okay, not so good." She scoffed.
Clara folded her arms. "So didn't you ever try anything with him?"
She blushed slightly. "Well, when we met Shakespeare I tried to come on to him."
Her eyes widen. "What happened?"
Martha sighed. "I didn't get very far, he killed the mood completely by mentioning Rose and calling me a rookie investigator," She smiled. "But I'm glad he did that because I really value our friendship, now."
Clara sighed heavily. "Well, every time we had sex he always felt guilty about it afterwards." "You can't blame him." Martha pointed out.
"I know but I'm sick of it even now when Danny and I have agreed to date casually he still won't take my suggestion of trying out friends with benefits." She replied frustrated.
"But there's no way the Doctor would do that." Martha said shaking her head.
Clara lowered her eyes and reached into her purse. "He might if I used this." She calmly pulled out the surrender patch and placed it on the table.
Her eyes grew. "Clara, where did you get this? You can't have this." Martha hissed.
"I found them." Clara replied. "Are there any more?" She asked lowering her voice.
"No, the Doctor took them all to destroy except I stole one patch." Clara explained.
"You know what these were used for? You know Jack used these for his cons, right?" She said. Clara nodded. "Yes, I'm aware."
She shook her head. "Clara, you wouldn't."
Clara shrugged. "I don't know, I haven't decided, yet." She replied simply.
"You can't. He'll be hurt if you did that to him." Martha replied with pleading eyes.
"He's not an angel, Martha. The Doctor's done things even he won't tell me." She answered in a defensive tone.
She sighed wishing Clara would understand. "I know but you have to understand the Doctor is wonderful and brilliant and very complicated. He is a rebel in his own right but deep down he still carries the morals he learned from the Galifreyan Academy. Sleeping with you has already compromised his Galifreyan morals but this is deceitful. If you do this it'll crush him. He'll feel betrayed."
Clara lowered her eyes. Martha just didn't get it.
Martha glanced at her watch. "I better go but think about it, yeah?" She said before leaving. Clara nodded. After she was gone Clara leaned forward in her seat holding the patch and staring at it.
She liked Martha but what did she know? If she had this patch she probably would've used it. Finally Clara had made up her mind she was going to use this patch on the Doctor tonight.
That night Clara had everything ready. She knew he wanted to fix the console so she took all the keys and locked the TARDIS so the Doctor couldn't get in and turned up the heat so he would have to take his leather jacket off but she kept hers on so he wouldn't suspect anything.
Her plan was that he'd start to feel hot and remove his jacket then he'd get distracted with opening the locked TARDIS door allowing Clara to stick the patch somewhere on bare skin. There was some guilt but it was too late to turn back, now. This had to work.
She sat on the couch waiting for him to enter the living room. "Clara!" He said walking in. "Yeah?" She replied pretending to read a book. "Is it hot in here to you?" The Doctor frowned. Despite feeling warm herself she calmly shook her head. "No."
"Seriously? It must be a thousand degrees in here!" He scowled. Clara scoffed "If you're warm then take off that hot jacket."
The Doctor playfully rolled his eyes. "Just love pointing out the obvious, huh?" He said taking the jacket off. She was relieved to see his shirt was short sleeves.
Clara smirked. "That's why you like me." He shook his head smiling and tossing it in a chair and sighed picking something up from the table.
"What's that?" She asked noticing something round with tubes sticking out of it in his hand.
"Oh, it's that the thing I was fixing earlier, I was going to take the spray and install it back on the console." He replied.
"Have fun." Clara replied nonchalant. "Are you alright?" He asked looking at her funny.
Clara nodded. "Of course." The Doctor shrugged and she glanced at him as he went to the TARDIS and attempted to open the door but was surprised when he couldn't. "Oi'!" He frowned.
"What's wrong?" She asked innocently. "I can't open the door!" The Doctor scoffed pulling on the handle. He looked at her confused. "I could've sworn I left the door unlocked." He set down the device.
"What about your keys?" Clara asked. He snapped his fingers. "Right." He started going through every drawer in all the rooms looking for them but they were gone. "Great, I can't find them!" He exclaimed throwing his hands up. The Doctor groaned. "I must've left them in the TARDIS!"
"Maybe it's not locked." Clara casually suggested.
He nodded. "Good point. Could you help me open it?"
She suppressed a smirk. "Sure." This was too easy!
The Doctor smiled. "Thanks, I really appreciate it!"
There was that twinge of a guilty conscience, again but she had to remain focused. The Doctor turned and grabbed the handle. "So I think if we both grab it we can open it." He said.
"Okay." She said reluctantly coming closer with the patch ready in her pocket. "Just got to stick it on his arm." She told herself but she was hesitant. "Uh, Clara sometime today." He said slightly impatient. "I'm coming." She insisted.
She could hear Martha's words in her mind and realized she couldn't do it. The guilt was too much. She stopped and shook her head. "I'm sorry." Clara said softly.
The Doctor looked at her puzzled. "Sorry for what?"
"I can't do it." She said removing her jacket. He watched her go to the thermostat turning it down then grabbed the keys from her purse setting them on the table and unlocked the TARDIS door for him.
Clara stood there and sighed. "Before you say anything I turned up the heat, hid the keys and locked the door." She waited for him to ask her why but instead the Doctor simply shrugged folding his arms. "I know. I always knew, Clara." He replied in a very calm tone.
Wait why wasn't he concerned or confused?
Clara looked at him strangely. "Hang on, he knew? How would he know unless..." Her heart dropped. She nervously checked her pockets but they were empty. She heard him clear his throat and she slowly looked at him as he held up her surrender patch twirling it in-between his fingers. "Looking for this?"