Disclaimer – I don't own Star Wars, though I wish I could find myself in a galaxy far, far away.
A/N – Holy crap! I wasn't really expecting much of a response with this story but you all are being so good to me! Thank you so much for reading and reviewing - I really, really appreciate it. Nothing is more motivating than knowing that people are actually reading. I hope you enjoy the new updates! I'll try to keep them up; I'm writing a lot this weekend so being in school won't slow me down. Thank you again!
Chapter 21
When Kylo opened his eyes, he saw nothing but grey. He lifted his head with difficulty, feeling as though he'd been physically knocked out, and looked around the room he found himself in. It looked very much like the interrogation rooms on the First Order's ships.
"I wasn't sure you'd wake," said a voice behind him.
Kylo tried to sit up but could not, finding his arms and legs bound to a cold metal chair. He nearly laughed at their attempt to control him but stilled when the bearer of the voice came into sight.
"Uncle," he said, staring into the eyes of the only man in the galaxy that could best him. He was not arrogant enough, foolish enough, to underestimate Luke Skywalker.
Luke pulled a chair across the floor and sat beside his nephew, the power within him nearly humming audibly in the quiet room. He looked up at Kylo with clear, light eyes, and Kylo knew that he could hide nothing from his uncle. He found himself not caring that all his secrets be brought to light.
"Neri?" he asked, searching Luke's face for any sign of how she was.
"She is alive. Her fate is in her own hands now. She must choose to wake."
Kylo nodded, barely containing his joy that she had not yet gone. He retained a small flicker of hope that she would at least allow him to beg her forgiveness, allow him to make things right before casting him away. He craved her love but would settle for her indifference, her forgiveness. He did not believe he could live through her hate.
"Ben," said his uncle quietly. Kylo focused on him, on the man who had helped to recognize his strength and had simultaneously undermined it. He had hated him for so long, despised all that he stood for, but he was grateful that he had saved Neri. He couldn't muster anything other than concern for her at that moment.
Luke sighed. "Ben, what have you become?" He was tired, bags beneath his eyes showing his fatigue. He had aged many years since Kylo had last seen him, hair greying and skin wrinkled, but he still remained stronger than most men could ever dream of.
"I don't believe you have the time to hear all that I've done uncle," he replied smartly. "Or the stomach."
Luke shook his head, his face showing the hurt he felt at seeing his sister's only child in such a way. "After everything, why did you let us take you? You have been fighting for so long, both in body and mind, but now…now you're so much like the confused child I knew all those years ago."
"Love is a weakness, is it not uncle?" Kylo replied after a long moment. "Is that not what that old fool Kenobi told your father?"
Luke stared at Kylo for a long time and the younger man stared back. His thoughts, his memories, were bared for the Jedi to see and Luke sifted through them slowly, feeling the change that Neri had brought.
"Love makes one vulnerable, yes," said Luke after a long pause to form his words. "But not necessarily weak. My father turned to the darkness to save my mother but in you, Kylo Ren, I feel the light breaking through, stifled so long by your need to fulfill your duties to your master." He stood, stepping closer to Kylo. "You've always struggled to find which side you belong on, where you can find your greatness, but I'm not certain that it is so clear for you. There is balance within the Force, but also balance within one's self. Perhaps that is what you find in that girl. Balance, peace."
He stepped away from his nephew and, with a flick of his wrist, released the restraints that held him in place. Kylo rose from the chair and faced his uncle, looking down at the man who had granted him mercy that day. He mulled over his words, over the impact that their truth could have, and pushed it momentarily from his mind.
"May I see her?" he asked, his voice eager. "I don't…I don't want to hurt her." He knew that his uncle had seen him throw Neri from the room, willfully thrusting her towards her death.
Luke nodded, motioning to the door. "I know Ben. I will bring you to her."
Kylo followed his uncle through the hallways of the ship they were on, eyes defiantly raised despite the looks of disgust he received from every person they passed. They knew nothing of who he was, what he had done to aid them in the time immediately before his capture. He did not fear their judgment.
"There are several scouting missions to Bohem right now, thanks to you," stated Luke as they rounded a corner. "Does it bother you that they don't know it was you who made it so simple to find Snoke?"
Kylo shook his head. "They would hate me all the same," he said, no doubt in his mind. "I am certain they believe me pulling off some greater scheme from within the Resistance right now."
Luke laughed, a low, warm sound. "You have always been perceptive Ben."
Kylo stopped walked and spun on his uncle. "Do you call me that to remind me of who I once was? To bring me back to the light? Is that why you are being kind to me?" His voice was quietly accusatory.
Luke shook his head. "I call you that because it is who you are now, who you have always been.."
Kylo started walking again. "Ben Solo is dead," he said. "But so is Kylo Ren. I am someone else entirely."
His uncle did not challenge him. Kylo could feel that he was near to her, could feel Neri's weak presence in the Force reaching out. Luke left him at the door, content to sit in the hall in quiet meditation. Kylo entered with held breath, only releasing it when he saw her chest rising a falling steadily on the bed.
He sat in the chair beside her bed and wrapped her small, still hand in both of his, willing his energy to enter her, give her strength. His eyes settled on her face, peaceful and without pain, and he felt as though his chest were collapsing upon itself. What had he done?
"Neri," he said pleadingly, brushing a wispy hair from her forehead. He swallowed a lump in his throat, hoping that it would not be the last chance he had to speak with her. "Neri Lei, you mustn't die, not like this. You deserve more than to die by a coward's hand. You must wake, must live to be the oldest woman in history, because you deserve nothing less." He brushed her jaw with his shaking fingertips. "I was stumbling through darkness before I met you, eyes closed to the entire galaxy and driven only by the hunger to be more powerful, to be more than anyone thought I could be, but I have begun to see the light because of you. My eyes are opening more and more to it every day that I am able to know you, and I don't want to go back to the dark. The universe, every bit of it, will die with you. You…you shouldn't wake up for me, shouldn't want anything to do with me after all the wrong that I have done to you, but please wake up. I will give my life to you if you will only wake up."
His fingers fell from her body and curled into the blanket, forehead against the scratchy material beside her hip. He allowed himself to cry, knowing that he only appeared to be as weak as he truly was in that moment. He fell into a fitful sleep beside her, repeating his mantra of wakeupwakeupwakeup until he slipped into unconsciousness.
Outside the door, his mother sank to the floor beside her brother, having seen her son through the window for the first time in too many years. Luke held her hand and she rested her head on his shoulder, feeling hope blossoming in her stomach despite the sadness that lay heavy on the space.
"He loves her to his own destruction," Luke said, squeezing Leia's hand. "He will do anything for her to wake."
Leia smiled in spite of who Kylo Ren had become, the misery he had caused. "My son has come home," she whispered, saying the words she had been dreaming of for so long, and she and Luke stayed there for hours, waiting for Ben to emerge.
Kylo Ren had been begging, reduced to a weak, teary-eyed fool. Across the galaxy, his master stood from his chair, feeling more alive than he had in centuries.