Defying the Maker

It had been two weeks since they had returned from Orlais. Leila was walking through Lowtown with Sebastian, who had insisted accompanying her to Merill's place. He was almost afraid of her being corrupted as Fenris. He was still trying to convince her to join the Andrastian religion, but Leila politely refused.

"You will see the light. I am sure of it and then you will find peace, as I did." He said fondly.

"You are sweet Sebastian, but I was never religious. By most standards I was forsaken long ago and I am not sure anything or anyone can save me. Please, use your well meant efforts on those you truly need the guidance of the Maker, instead of wasting your valuable time on me." She smiled kindly.

"You are already much more of an Andrastian, than you realise." He smiled obviously not giving up so easily.

"I... what is going on over there?" Leila asked looking at a crowd gathering in the middle of Lowtown.

"We better turn around." Sebastian said immediately and took her arm gently.

"No, I want to know." She said walking through the crowd.
Walking through it, she saw a podium build out of wood and a pole in the middle of it. Seeing the rope she realised what it was. It was a noose and her blood turned cold. The people gathered were almost exited, but she had never felt more uneasy in her life. She saw the templars escorting an older woman, who was crying, up onto the podium. One of the templars, a man with blond hair and a beard around his mouth, started to read the charges.

"For harbouring an apostate and helping in this apostate to escape the circle, you are hereby sentenced to death, by orders of Knight-commander Meredith. May the Maker have mercy on your soul." He said loud and stepped back.
Sebastian grabbed Leila's arm, as she stepped forward.

"Leila don't! This is the law and the will of the Maker. It is in his hands." Sebastian said in a low voice, but Leila gave him a deadly glare and wiggled free.

"I only fed my daughter. She had been beaten and needed somewhere to stay. Please, show mercy." The old woman begged as the put the noose around her neck.

"Let her go!" Leila cried through the crowed pushing herself forward. Her cry barely heard from the excitement of the crowd.

"Let. Her. Go!" Leila screamed now right in front of the podium.

"She has supported a malificar! She deserves this!" One of the templars growled.

"You wear the sword of mercy, as a symbol on your chest. It is supposed to be a symbol of what the order stands for. Please heed it now!" Leila begged and the blonde man looked directly into her eyes, completely astonished.

"You filthy little robe lover!" One of the templar roared and with his iron gloved fist hit Leila on the right side of her face, sending her to the ground. The glove made a cut on her face and she could taste blood in her mouth, though she hardly felt the pain because of the anger she felt. He was about to hit again, when the blonde templar stopped him.

"That is quite enough." He said calmly. Sebastian walked up behind Leila and helped her up.

"I am sorry, knight-captain. My friend is very spirited." Sebastian apologized and Leila gave him a furious glare, but was too dumbfounded to speak.

"Not at all. I am sorry young lady, but we must abide by the chantry's rules." Cullen replied apologetic.

Sebastian was about to say something to Leila, when she wiggled free of his grasp and ran through the crowd. As she ran, she could hear the crowd cheering and she knew that old lady had died. She hated this world. She hated how cold and heartless it was and the racism send her rage boiling out of control. She hated the filth spouted by chantry priests and templars, who had twisted the words of a noble woman to their own means. She ran through Lowtown towards Darktown, to the only person she wanted to see. The only one who was truly compassionate and kind. The only one who seemed to understand her. She ran through the doors of the clinic and straight toward Anders, throwing her arms around his waist and burrowing her face in his chest.

"Leila, what happened?" He asked with widened eyes, as he put down the salve he had been making.

As she was trembling from anger and unable to speak a word, he wrapped his arms around her. He held her tight and despite Justice's objections, kissed her hair. Sebastian came running into the clinic a few minutes later.

"Thank the Maker, there you are!" He exclaimed, but his face turned grim, as he saw her in Anders' embrace. At the sound of his voice, she let go of Anders and gave Sebastian a cold deadly glare.

"I don't want to talk to you, you bloody hypocrite!" She growled and Anders noticed the damage on her face.

"Maker, Leila what happened? What did you do to her?" Anders growled with a little of Justice's voice echoing in it, while looking at Sebastian.

"I did nothing!" He replied astounded, that anyone could assume he would do such a thing.

"Nothing is just right! You did nothing, when they hanged that poor woman! You did nothing, when a templar hit me! You preach mercy and forgiveness, but show none of it! Damn your chantry and that hypocritical order of templars!" Leila growled and understanding dawned of Anders, who was now seriously struggling to keep Justice under control.

"You are upset. Everything that happens is the will of the Maker and serves a larger purpose, we simply do not comprehend yet." Sebastian said softly, but anger flared in Leila's eyes.

"Alright Maker, listen up! If you are unable to show mercy to those who need it! If it is more important to you that people have faith, than whether their actions are good or bad, then by all means send me to the void! I want nothing of your glory, if you have no compassion and understanding for those shunned by this world! And when I am in this void of yours, I will defy you once more, by relishingevery moment I am in it!" Leila yelled on top of her lungs, looking up, as her voice made its way through Darktown. Both Anders and Sebastian looked at her with complete disbelief.

"Leila..." Anders said softly with concern and shock, looking at her.

"That's blasphemy!" Sebastian gasped.

"I don't care what you call it! This must have been shocking indeed, since I managed to even offend the possessed apostate." Leila laughed bitterly.

"Don't you care about your soul?" Sebastian asked dumbfounded.

"Do you know why I am not afraid? Why I do not fear your Maker? Why I am not afraid of death? Because I meant every word I said." She said firmly.

"You better leave Sebastian." Anders said calmly, but firmly and Sebastian left without another word.

Anders walked towards her and lifted her onto the table to sit. He let his hand glow with healing and let it caress her cheek. He could feel Justice upset by the injustice and even more about what had happened to Leila. She was a distraction, but she was his distraction and no one was allowed to harm her.

"You shouldn't have said those things." He said, softly stroking her cheek as he continued to heal her.

"I never believed. Saying out loud what is hidden in my heart, should not make a difference to a deity." She replied.

"I am not very devout myself, but I cannot bear the thought of you being in the void for eternity." He said with loving concern.

"If he is as merciful as they say, I won't. And if he isn't, at least I'll end up in the same place as you. I don't want to be a place, where you are not welcome." She replied looking into his eyes.

Her heart was beating fast at this admission, as she finally admitted to herself, that this was much more than just a crush. He was the only one, who she could talk to, who understood. The only one who truly listened and the only one who gave her hope, when she had none. At this moment she realised, that she would not have been able to go through these many months without him. That it was his company, which made her miss her home less. He alone could make her want not to go back. She found herself wondering, if she would have given into despair if it weren't for him. If she would have just ended it all and freed herself from the never ending trials and heartbreak, which life demanded as payment? He looked at her softly and was breathing heavily as his pupils became dilated.

"You shouldn't say such things. Regardless of Justice, I am still a man. You can't tease me like this and expect me to resist forever. You don't want this." He said softly, with an almost painful expression as he took a few steps backwards.
She jumped of the table and looked at him.

"Do you know what I want? I want to be by your side and help people as you do. I want to make those sad eyes of yours smile. I want to kiss every scar the templars have given you, until you look at them and remember nothing of the pain, but only my lips touching them." She replied with heavy breathing and her body trembling.

Anders launched forward, holding her face in his hands, as he captured her lips in a heated, desperate and passionate kiss. She instantly wrapped her arms around him and felt her blood rushing through her veins, with almost unbearable speed. He kissed her soft lips feverishly, as he felt her body melt into him. His heart was beating in a triumphant rhythm and Justice's warnings were drowned by it. He moaned, when her tongue gained entry into his mouth and his own eagerly caressed hers. He felt her knees go weak, as she was holding onto him for support. He wrapped one arm around her waist and tucked the other into her hair, releasing it from its bondage. The soft long waves fell down and his hand enjoyed the feeling of it. She tasted so sweet and the ache in his body was replaced by a surge of electricity, which accompanied the feeling of happiness. He had completely forgotten what that felt like. When he finally pulled away, they were both breathing heavily.

"I thought with Justice, this part of me was over. I can't give you a normal life. If you are with me we will be hunted, hated. The whole world will be against us." He said seriously with a touch of desperation, giving her a chance to realise her mistake.

"I know what this means, Anders. I know that being with you means risking everything. I know that being with you, will mean living in places like this or in a ditch somewhere, always on the run. I am not blind and I am not deluded. You are fighting the templars on a daily basis, defying them. I will not be scared or threatened into submission, by anyone. I will not give them the power to dictate who I can be with." She replied seriously.

He captured her lips again. For almost a year he had longed for her. And now she was finally in their embrace returning their affections. He let his hands slide up her back pressing her into him. Even through his robes and her corset, he could feel the heat coming from her. She melted into him, her warmth comforting and soothing. It had been more than three years since he had been this close to another and he had forgotten the mere pleasure of it. But this was so much more than that. This was not just a physical closeness. The last time he had been held by someone he truly loved, was when he was torn from his mother's embrace by templars. That was fifteen years ago. He didn't realise the silent tears that had fallen from his eyes, before he tasted them on her lips. She noticed it too and pulled away and looked up at him with concern. When he gave a low chuckle her expression changed into a sweet smile and stroked the tears from his cheeks.

"You should go home. If your..." Anders began, but she silenced him with a kiss.

"No. I am not going anywhere." She replied and rested her head on his chest her arms wrapped around his waist. Then Anders remembered, the reason she had come here in the first place. He took her chin and made her look at him. The cut and bruise on her cheek were healed and left in its stead only a slight redness. He kissed the spot softly and could feel Justice's anger. He was angry at the damage the templars had already caused her and the spirit feared that more would befall her, if they continued on this path.

"Anders, tell her to leave. Push away your obsession. Our efforts to help the mages will be impaired and distracted, by our desire to protect her. We will only cause her more suffering. Please. For her sake at least."The spirit pleaded in his mind. At the sound of Justice's words, Anders' expression turned sad.

"What is it?" She asked softly.

"We shouldn't do this. There will be more violence I know that and the thought of them hurting you... Everything I have done to control this... I don't care. I..." He replied with desperation trying to pull away, but she kissed him, before she placed her hands on his cheeks and made him look at her.

"Sweet Anders, listen to me. I will speak against the suppression of the chantry, if I am with you or not. I will speak on behalf of the elves, the refugees and the mages regardless. It is a path Ichose and you cannot save me from it. I know that all of this might end in a violent conflict, but I am going to do my outmost to try and find a peaceful solution. I know that is what you want as well. That is why you are hurting so, because you feel forced to take actions that you'd rather not. Like I did with Karass." She explained softly with a kind expression and in an instant his hesitation seemed to dissipate. How could he believe that he would be able to go on without her?

"This will be a disaster, but I can't live without it." He breathed with a smile and happiness in his eyes, as he looked down at her.

"Neither can I." She replied more seriously than intended.
He gave her a small kiss.

"Wait here. I'll be right back." He said softly kissing her nose and walked away. He blew out the candle in the lantern and locked the clinic doors. He then walked back, took her hand and let her to the fire and placed her in his lap, with his arms wrapped around her.