Chapter 21: A Voice Within
Fili's head was pounding. It was the reason he had been in such a foul mood. At least, that is what he told himself to help rationalize his actions earlier. But in all honesty he did not know why he was so angry. Strictly speaking Torvi had done nothing wrong. He had instructed that she was not allowed outside the gates without an escort. That had been the rule, to have one escort with her. He had never stated the specifics of who counted as an escort. Today, not only did she abide by his rule and had an escort but she had two with her. Therefore he should not have been angry. Yet here he was. At this very moment he was just barely managing to keep from expressing the rage within as he walked up the slope to the entrance.
The moment he watched Torvi pass through the gates and separate from Bilbo he had felt a wave of relief wash through him. It left his body feeling drained but his mind felt rejuvenated with clarity. He could think rationally as the rage seemed to ebb away.
Now free of the anger and resentment he had been feeling earlier, his mind began to realize just how irrational he had been. Something that seemed to becoming a habit as of late.
After entering Erebor, he walked down the narrow and less trafficked hallways trying to find solitude. He did not have a destination in mind but his feet seemed to know where to be taking him so he let his instincts take over his body's movements and let his brain focus solely on his thoughts. As the last remnants of his earlier headache finally disappeared completely, he brought his hand to his stiff neck and rubbed. The muscles were sore from having been so tense earlier. As a sigh sounded in his throat he let his eyes close momentarily as he let the relief of tension pass over him.
When he reopened his eyes he found himself alone in front of a lone door. He immediately recognized it as the door leading to the room with the passage to the cave. A grim smile came to his lips as he let his hand fall from his neck and reach out to the handle. Slowly, he made his way into the room. It was just as usual, dusty, cluttered, and held a musty aroma. He quickened his pace to cross the room and moved the large trunk that was in front of the opening in the wall. As he moved the heavy trunk away he noticed the disturbance of dust it left in its wake as it slid across the floor.
How long had it been since the trunk had been moved?
He could not remember the last time he had been to the cave. He usually only came with Torvi or to meet with Torvi. While she had offered for him to use it whenever he pleased, he realized this was the first time he had ever been to the cave by himself without the knowledge that Torvi would be already there or joining my him shortly. He crouched down and made his way through the dark tunnel.
Slowly and steadily a faint blue glow began to light the end of the tunnel and he soon found himself standing in the large cavern, the warmth of the air brought some feeling back to his cold limbs and face. He had forgotten how comforting this place was.
He let his eyes wander around, taking in the familiar stone formations that jutted from the ceiling and floor. As he crossed over to the usual spot he and Torvi would occupy a strange feeling overcame the usual relaxed and comforting aura the cavern usual contained.
It did not feel right. He frowned. None of this felt right. Torvi had entrusted him when she showed him to the cave. She had given him this as a refuge from his worries and stresses of life. It was a gift she had bestowed upon him long before they had even reached a part of their relationship where they even owed such an action. Here he stood in a sanctuary from all the worries of his world as heir, peace should have been in his mind but instead he felt guilt.
Torvi cherished this cavern but it was not her sanctuary, perhaps a shrine to her freedom but it was not as extensive to her, as it was for himself. Her sanctuary was not in this cave, it was not in this mountain. It was the wilderness where she could run freely without the burden of someone reprimanding or judging her actions. It was where she could be the person she was before she came to Erebor. The person she was her whole life and he had ripped that away from her. He had taken away her sanctuary because he did not trust her.
"But her sanctuary is not safe, she is not safe outside of the walls or Erebor".
A shiver ran down his spine, it was as if someone else had spoken within his mind. But it was not normal, it had sounded sinister and serpent like. Fili ran a hand over his face only to feel a sheen of cold sweat across his brow. He rubbed his hand against his pants to try and dry them but they too were cold and clammy. His attempt to dry them was futile and he quickly gave up. The dull throb in his head came back so suddenly and forcefully he collapsed to the ground. He let out a groan of pain as he cradled his head. Immediately his senses became disarrayed as they were enhanced and dulled all to varying degrees. His body became numb of feeling while his ears seemed to become heightened to even the smallest of sounds. A single drop of water sounded like rapid waves crashing against hardened rocks.
He could hear his own breath coming out raggedly and tried to focus on calming down but the pain was too much. He could not focus. He could not control anything as his body began to shake. The floor beneath him began to blur as his eyes watered and red spots began to manifest themselves before him.
Adrenaline flooded his body as his heart beat with ferocity and his mind fought for control as another presence forced its way. He saw flashes of Torvi smiling and laughing. At the sight his body immediately began to relax at the vision. Unfortunately his moment of relief only lasted enough for one ragged breath before his vision expanded. It was as if he were standing at her side instead of before him now and she was smiling at someone else. The figure was clouded but he could see by the shape and masculine build it was another man.
Rage erupted in his core and his hands released his head, slamming into the stone ground. He gritted his teeth as he breathed heavily, small flecks of spit sprayed out of his mouth each time he expelled a violent breath but he ignored it. His vision was no longer blurred but he still could not acknowledge the sight outside his body as his thoughts blocked all knowledge of his outside environment. He was only in a world within his mind. A world where he felt his consciousness being suffocated by a darkness that was slowly consuming his mind. It seemed foreign and separate his instinct told him to keep it at bay, to fight it off.
"Don't fight me," Coaxed a voice.
It had been voice from before.
"What are you?"
The thought escaped into his mind as if he were speaking to another person.
"I am the same as you, yet different," replied the voice within head. "Your desire is mine. There only one thing that separates us, I can do what you cannot."
Another searing throb of pain surged through his head as the darkness tried to take another portion of his mind. The small portion that remained instinctively threw up a mental barrier. He needed to fight it, he needed to keep clarity, he had to resist not matter how persuasive the voice sounded.
"I can keep her safe, I can keep her protected. I can control her," The voice tried again as it pushed further to overcome his mind.
He was not sure how he had the knowledge, but all Fili knew to be certain, was that he needed to keep fighting. He needed a grounding in reality.
"No," He thought in response.
It was as if he were having a conversation within his head.
"No?" The presence replied with question. "Do you mean you want her to die?"
"No. I mean I will not let you in. I do not know what you are, but I will not give in."
A darkness passed through his mind as a menacing feeling emerged from the darkness over taking his mind. Instead of receiving a response, visions flashed before Fili's eyes, causing his fortitude to weaken just ever so slightly.
He was walking through a forest. There was an eerie silence that seemed to be suffocatingly dense. There were no sounds of wildlife. No rustling of bird wings as they flew. No scrambling of creatures in the underbrush. Not even the scuttle of a beetle across the fallen leaves. He moved to take a step and stopped.
Before him lay a small opening in the forest. The grass growing in the opening was wild and untamed it glistened with an early morning dew. As he studied the small droplets he noted the strange color the dew had. Immediately his stomach churned as the strong metallic scent of iron invaded his nostrils. He gagged the moment he realized it was not dew, but blood that stained the grass.
It was as if this new found knowledge changed the scene before him. The amount of blood that pooled in the blades of grass made it seem as the grass itself was red in color. The amount of blood was disturbing. Death hung in the air, nothing could have survived such a large loss of blood.
He moved to turn and retreat from the clearing but something seemed to suddenly appear. It was as if an invisible barrier had been covering it from sight earlier but at his movement it was lifted, revealing what was hiding behind it. A body lay in the middle of the field. Like the grass, it too was covered in blood. Despite his mind telling him not to go closer, his feet moved towards the body on their own accord.
It was a dwarf maid laying face down. Her hair was stained red from blood making her natural hair color indistinguishable. As he reached down something in his gut told him not to look but it was as if he had no control of his body. He slowly rolled the girl's body around. It was icy as if the body had been void of life for a long period of time. The moment he saw half of the girls face his heart stopped. He retracted his hands away to avoid seeing anymore of her face but it was too late. The body was already in motion and gravity did the rest in forcing the girl to roll over with a sickening stiffness.
A sick realization came to him. While blood was matted in the tangles and snarls of the once soft curls, the color was in fact not changed by the blood. Her hair was naturally red. Only now it was highlighted with the fresh blood that was streaked through its strands making it seem more seer in color. Fili fell to his knees before the body, before her, before Torvi. His eyes roamed over her dead corpse taking in every scrape, bruise, and piercing that adorned her flesh. Blood covered every inch of her. Her dress was torn. No, not torn but shredded to pieces where various weapons had sliced into her body.
The vast majority of blood had come from a gaping hole in her abdomen. He became conscious of the wetness on his knees. He looked down to see he was kneeling in the pool of blood that Torvi was lying in, that she had created. His trousers were soaked with her blood. His hands shook violently as he tried to reach out to her, to help her, but there was nothing he could do.
"This could have been prevented," The voice broke the eerie silence that Fili had long forgotten about. "I could have kept her safe."
Fili looked around in search of the source of the voice but there was no one to be seen.
"Where are you?" The question came out weak and choked. When no reply came, Fili forced himself from his feet and scanned the surrounding trees. "Show yourself!" He bellowed to the silent woods.
"But I am already visible, you are just not looking in the right place. Look down."
Fili followed the instructions only to be greeted with a disturbing reflection of himself in the pool of blood he was standing in.
"There I am," The voice sounded again.
It was in this moment that Fili realized the voice was not sounding in his ears but between them. It was in his mind. Then another realization came to him. He remembered the eerie silence from before. His steps had never made a sound. Even the rustle of leaves from a slight breeze was silenced despite Fili seeing their slight movement. He looked up, he could see the leaves moving yet he could not feel the wind. Then it hit him. The wind was not real, this was not real, it was an illusion. This was not Torvi before him, she was not dead.
He closed his eyes focusing his mind on voices source. It was easy to detect as the dark and foreign presence had almost consumed everything.
"Get out," Fili commanded in his mind. "Leave me be and get out."
A hiss sounded from the darkness. "Are you sure? Are you sure you want her to die?" The voice questioned.
"She is not going to die! Leave me!" His thought came out strong like a verbal shout as if his mouth had actually voiced the words.
He thought he heard a muffled sound but the foreign presence was too much and he could not risk his focus being weakened by distraction. The presence was pushing itself forward but was meet with resistance as Fili reasserted himself. He needed to gain control again and that meant he needed to regain control of his body. He put forth all efforts on trying to become aware of his surroundings again. He felt the hard stone digging into his knees and he focused on the pain. It was not pleasant but it anchored him to reality. He need to get back to reality and out of his head. It was the only way he could win and after a spout of effort he began to reap the rewards of his efforts. The soft trickle of water dripping from the spring echoed in his ears and he fought to open his eyes. He needed to open his eyes.
Something gentle and soft touched his left shoulder as he heard a muffled voice say his name. The contact startled him so much he flinched away. His instinct told him that this physical contact and this voice was not a threat. It was safe. Someone else was here, someone else that was not the antagonist presence within his mind. He used the knowledge of not being alone to fuel his next efforts to free himself. He took in a deep breath and opened his mouth to speak.
"Get out!" He shouted in a firm command as he wrenched his eyes open.
His vocal command to expel the ominous presence was successful. The moment he opened his eyes the presence was gone from his mind bringing back full clarity and awareness to his thoughts but his senses were still struggling as exhaustion replaced the adrenaline that he was relying heavily on.
His vision was still blurry and his body shook with weakness. He tried to become aware of his position on the ground but his whole body was numb of any feeling. Releasing his mind took a heavy toll on him physically, emotionally, and mentally. He tried to focus but everything was a blur. All he could make out was the hue of two vivid green orbs before his face. He tried to reach up and touch them but exhaustion took over and he slumped forward. His mind thought about Torvi and he tried to call out for her but blackness came over him and he lost consciousness.
Torvi remained alone at the balcony where Thorin left her for only a few more minutes as she did her best to reign in her emotions. She felt foolish and ashamed for her moment of weakness in contemplating the breaking of her courtship. She was not sure how the thought nor the question had even arisen. It had popped into her head so quickly that she had to know. If she were completely honest with herself she was grateful for her moment of weakness. For Thorin had instilled a new resolution in her.
He had been right. Some force had driven a wedge between her a Fili and they would have to work it out together in order to remove the wedge that separated them. She was already tired of fighting but even now she knew there was much more to come. Thorin had even said it himself that they would have to fight for themselves. Hopefully if things went in her favor, anymore fighting that was to be done, they would not be pitted against each other. Their bickering had to stop, they needed to ally themselves.
The first step would be to find Fili and calmly and rationally speak with him. She let out a soft sigh. She was already drained emotionally and physically for the day and her mental stamina was just barely enough to collect her current thoughts. The desire to go home and sleep until morning came was beginning to sound too enticing to ignore.
She began to quickly make her way home but soon slowed down after only a few steps. No, she could not delay this any longer. Every moment counted and she could not put off the inevitable. Without stopping she veered to her right taking a different stairwell leading the opposite direction of home. As she made her way to the last step she made a list of places to search for Fili.
The first five places she sought Fili proved to be fruitless. With each place she became more agitated with herself, with Fili, and with the giant mass that Erebor was. She took a quick rest in a secluded corridor to brainstorm. Her body leaned against the cold stone which had a soothing effect on her mind as she closed her eyes and contemplated. Fili would seek her out usually at Jorra's stall or in the library where she spent most of her time to avoid her mother. They would perhaps take a small walk around the more busy halls of the mountain in order to familiarize and establish their roles as future leaders. It was not her favorite part but Fili had explained that Thorin had made the request not long after their courtship began. After they paid their respects to several people they would slip away for solitude. Usually found in the cave where they knew no one would disturb them. Her eyes snapped open. The cave. The moment she thought of it she bitterly chastised herself for not thinking of it earlier. It had been quite some time since she had gone and she wondered if Fili had been frequenting it recently or not. She stopped going a little after he left to retrieve Bilbo. The cave was sacred to her as it provided her with solitude at first but once she showed it to Fili she felt it no longer belonged to just her anymore. When he was not with her it did not feel right. It felt inappropriate to seek it out knowing he would not be coming. After the second day following his departure she had not returned. As she began to make the fastest route to the entrance, a small smile came to her face. It seemed appropriate that they redeem their relationship where it seemed to have begun. Every moment and memory spent with him in the cave was a happy one. It seemed almost guaranteed that no matter what they had to discuss right now it would go well if they were in the cave. Her hopeful moral went up the moment she saw the disrupted chest that usually covered the hole in the wall. Fili was there. Her heart leapt in excitement. She was optimistic about what was about to happen. She wanted things to go back to how they were when all seemed blissful. Crouching down she began to make her way down the dark tunnel. She focused her mind to steady her breath, concentrating on the knowledge that there was an end and she would not get trapped. She had forgotten how much her body tried to shut itself down in fear of the small space. She closed her eyes and stopped to take in a calming breath. She breathed in then slowly let the air out as she cleared her mind. As her heart began to slow down its hurried palpitations, her senses began to come back to her as the thudding of her heart no longer deafened her hearing. The moment she moved to continue on she froze mid crawl, one arm outstretched to make the next movement forward. A faint groan echoed from further up the passageway. It sounded pained and sorrowed. Her heart immediately began to quicken back to its rapid beat from earlier but this time for different reasons. Her fear of the condensed spaces no longer bothered her as she snapped into movement. She scurried across the stone like a rat fleeing a flooded sewer. Her hand grazed against a sharp rock and the sensation of warm wetness told her she was bleeding but she ignored it. Someone was in trouble ahead, and the only soul who could be that someone was Fili. She finished the last stretch and stood fully as her eyes scanned the cavern. She stopped mid scan when she spotted Fili crouched on the ground. She ran to his side and slid down to the ground before him unsure of what was happening. His breathing was ragged and inconsistent. One moment he would be hyperventilating then the next he would hold his breath for far too long. He let out another groan and clenched his hands. She watched as his nails left bloody grooves in the sandstone. His groan turned into muttering nonsense. Soon she realized he was not even aware of her presence.
She knew he did not have any meetings today according to Balin who she had ran into at the market. Usually, before this mess of complicated bickering between them started, he would spend any free time with her. But obviously that was not the case. She thought about what they would normally do if they were not fighting.
She reached out to his shoulder calling out his name but he retracted from her touch as if she had burned him. She called his name again but it still seemed he was unaware of her presence. He was too focused on something else. She moved to touch him again but froze in the middle of her action when he spoke suddenly.
"Leave me," His tone was sharp and while the words seemed to be still only a mumer they were the first words she had understood with clarity.
She snapped her hand to her chest feeling hurt from his words. His words had been filled with a tone of despise. Her eyes burned as the tears from earlier threatened to come back. Perhaps he was aware of her presence.
"Fili?" Her voice was barely audible as it ached with hurt.
His murmuring continued. She could not make out anything but a few syllables and words here and there. Nothing close enough to make any sense. She tried to call out to him again this time not making any physical contact with him. Her efforts seemed inevitable in breaking through to him until he said two words strongly and loudly.
"Get out!" He screamed.
His words caused her to move herself further away as she had not expected his outburst. She watched as his eyes snapped open the moment the last syllable left his lips. She could finally see the bright blue through his lashes but their was a haze to them. His head rose until his eyes were pointed directly at her. He squinted as if to focus but feel forward instead. She caught him before his he hit the stone floor and pulled him into her shaking arms.
"Torvi." He murmured quietly.
Whether he had said it in an act to call out for her or acknowledgement that she was there, she did not know. It did not matter. She hugged him tightly as tears fell from her face into his hair making it damp.
"I'm here," She whispered as she let her hand pet his head soothingly.
There was no response except for his labored breath seemed to become more rhythmic with her touch. He was no longer conscious. She frantically tried to decide what to do. She needed to get Fili help but she could not leave him, not in this state. She struggled to her knees as she kept him from falling from her embrace to the floor. In his unconscious state he was heavier and could do nothing to help support himself.
He brain raced with worry as to what to do, sending her body into full panic mode. She was on the breech of hysteria when another murmur of her name from Fili's lips brought her back enough to focus. She concentrated on that fraction of focus. She could not let herself worry about everything, she needed to take it one step at a time. She brought in a calming lung full of air and let it out.
"Focus," She thought to herself.
Clarity came to her mind and became her ally. She needed to get Fili to Thorin, he would know what to do. A slight panic came to her as she thought about how heavy Fili was. She knew she had strength, she was not weak. However moving a dead carcass from hunting and moving a living person was different. A dead deer could be dragged along with rope or carelessly slung across her back. Fili was still alive and the thought of dragging him along the ground carelessly was not an option.
"You need to get him out of the cave before worrying about lifting him," Her mind reminded her.
So took in another calming breath. Her rational mind was right. She would not be able to carry him on her back through the passageway. She focused on the first step to getting to her goal. She needed to get Fili out of the cave.
Her eyes dashed around the cavern in search for any inspiration. After finding nothing that would aid her, she rolled him onto his back and grabbed his arms, took a step, and pulled. He slid across the ground easily and the small flicker of hope encouraged her to take another step and pull.
The effort was laborious and slow. But the time she had managed to get him through the tunnel she was drenched in sweat and his clothes were torn and shredded from the occasional unsmooth surface of the cavern ground. Despite this fact she could not help but feel a small glimmer of hope as she focused on her next step. She needed to get Fili to Thorin. She let herself remain sitting on the ground to rest for a moment before moving into action again.
Once stable on her knees she hooked her arms beneath his and staggered to pull his weight up with her as she stood. Immediately his legs buckled and he began to fall forward pushing her over as well. She quickly braced her feet and caught him. However, she could not move with out dropping him or falling over herself. She let out a grunt of frustration. She needed to try something else.
As softly as she could she let his body slide back to the ground as she let her back leg fall down to a lunge as she supported his weight with her other leg. It was not as gentle as she wished but it was all she could manage. She looked to the door and thought of the many stairs and corridors that she would have to carry him through until they even got to the populated area. At the thought of other people his stomach dropped. She could not let anyone see Fili like this. At least not anyone who was not family or close with the royal family.
Desperation wreaked through her body as she tried to calm her uncontrolled tears that burst from her eyes at the thought. Her tears only ran for a moment before she abruptly shook herself. She needed to stay focused. Once she was calmed, she moved back into action.
Shakily she pulled Fili to the wall and propped him up against it. She called out to him in an effort to snap him out of whatever kind of state he was in. Her hands slapped his cheeks lightly but she only received a small flutter of his eyes. Finally Torvi was rewarded with only a single glimpse of blue before his eyes closed again in exhaustion. She let out a cry of frustration and slapped him harder.
"Fili wake up!" She shouted.
Fili's eyes snapped open as he let out a shocked groan. He stared wildly at her as clarity came to his eyes for a moment. She watched as his lips formed her name but no sound came from his attempt to speak.
"I need you to focus. I need you to help me get up, can you do that?"
He stared at her vacantly. She watched has his eyes move to his arm as it twitched with an effort to move. Once it fell still, he let out a sigh and shook his head a fraction. She glared at him.
"Yes you can," She commanded.
She grabbed his arms and pulled him forward while she turned until he was leaning on her back. "I am not giving you a choice." She grumbled.
He gave no verbal reaction but she felt his head move up and down as he hummed and affirmative note. Slowly, with only a fraction of help from Fili, Torvi managed to stand. She stood hunched over, her back already aching for relief of its heavy burden but she ignored it.
"I need you to hold on as tight as you can," she said as she regarded his loose arms that looped over her shoulders and around her neck.
She felt his hold only tighten a small amount but it was enough to give her confidence he would not slip off. She grasped his forearms with an iron grip and took a step forward. Her thigh screamed from the exertion but she pushed onward and took another step.
"You can do this," She told herself. "You have to do this."
Torvi let them both fall down to the ground as she set her feet firmly at the top of the stair well. Fili let out a groan as she dropped him from her back. She had meant to set him down carefully but her legs had given out and her sweaty hands had lost their hold on his arms. She was not even sure as to what the time was or how long it took her to get them this far. It had seemed like an eternity but she had managed to get them to the final corridor that would be free of any usual traffic and she could go no further.
Her eyes surveyed Fili as he leaned against the wall. He seemed to be fading in and out of consciousness. He looked to be in pain again. Not as much as before but she could see the subtle change in his fortitude. He was fighting something with in his mind again.
She frowned. This was taking too long she needed to leave him and go find help.
"Fili," she said softly.
His eyes flickered to hers. She studied them for a moment trying to decide if he was with her or not. Once she deemed him aware of her she spoke again.
"I need to go find help," she explained. "I have to leave you here ok. Don't go anywhere."
She felt her last request was foolish and pointless. Where would he go? He could hardly keep his eye lids open let alone move himself. She moved to stand but stopped when his arm flashed with lightning speed and grasped his hand around her forearm. She looked back to his face and saw a different countenance. His eyes looked dark and threatening but still seemed lost. As if he were not truly looking at her.
"Fili?"
The sound of his name seemed to wake him from his strange actions and she felt his grip relax.
"No," He said gently. "Please, don't leave me."
She looked at him with worry. His eyes seemed so desperate as if he feared that something were to approach him if left alone. She placed her free hand on the hand that gripped her opposite arm.
"Fili, I will be back," she assured him. "I promise I will come back as soon as I find help. But I have to leave. OK?"
His eyes still held that strange fear but slowly, hesitantly he nodded. She gave him a smile before grasping his hand and placed it in his lap. Before leaving she placed both hands on his cheeks and placed her forehead against his. He was just as sweaty as she was but his was cold and clammy against her own hot flush. She breathed in deeply and waited for him to match her calm breathing before gently placing a kiss against his brow and left.
It was all a blur in Torvi's mind. One moment she was racing through empty hallways, then she was racing through crowded streets of color and noise. Despite everything around her sending out sensory signals, she could not even distinguish a single word or color as she stumbled through the masses. Somehow she found herself before Thorin's study and was entering the room without so much as a knock or hesitation in her step.
Thorin, Bofur, and Dwalin all stood around a large stone desk inspecting several documents. All three males startled at her abrupt entrance. At first a look of annoyance and dissatisfaction flashed across each of their faces until they noticed Torvi's frantic state.
Her words came out like vomit, as her words spewed uncontrollably from her mouth. They were in such disarray they made no sense to the three men. Her panicked state escalated as she realized her failure to communicate. Dwalin stared at her with wide eyes as if she were a lunatic shouting in the streets. Bofur had a similar expression however she could sense a small hint of compassion as he looked at her with a firm face of concentration as he tried to decipher the meaning of her words.
Thorin was the first to move into action. He quickly stepped from out behind his desk and approached her. He firmly placed his hands on each of her arms to steady her. For the first time Torvi acknowledged how much her entire body was involuntarily shaking until his hold held her in place. Slowly, he lowered himself until he was at her eye level and looked straight into her irises.
"Torvi," his tone was gentle yet commanding, "you need to calm down. What is wrong?"
"It...it's Fili….he is not," she struggled to keep her words clear and concise, "he is not himself. I think he is sick."
While her words did not convey the full explanation, the urgency in her voice was enough to convey the severity of the situation. Without saying a word to Dwalin and Bofur, he immediately exited the room, with one hand still firmly placed on Torvi's right upper arm to steer her with him as he walked.
"Where is he?"
"The….the lower levels, just after the passage leading to the mines where the corridors have yet to be completely repaired."
Thorin's pace quickened as he lengthened his strides causing Torvi to stumble along at a jog. They had only made it down the hallway before Kili came from around the corner. He looked confused to see Thorin pulling Torvi along then worried as he saw the set jaw and frown adorning his uncle's face. Once he noticed Torvi's tear salted face and red eyes, his worry evolved into dread.
"Uncle, what is going…"
His question was cut short as the two reached him and Thorin latched his free hand to his left arm.
"Find Oín and take him to Fili's room, take the back passages and make sure no one knows where you are taking him," Thorin instructed.
His eyes bore into Kili, giving him a silent plea to do as he told without question. Kili swallowed down the swarm of questions that he craved to ask and nodded instead. The moment his head made its motion, Thorin released him and made his way down the stairwell taking Torvi with him. Obediently, Kili moved into action making his way to the infirmary in search of Oín.
Thorin led Torvi through passageways and narrow stairwells that she had not even known existed. Before she could even register the new found complexity of the mountains design, they were standing before Fili.
He was exactly where she had left him but he was not the same as she left him. He was worse. In fact, he was even worse than she had first found him. He sat on the ground staring vacantly ahead of him. He was obviously oblivious to their presence as he mumbled quietly to himself. Torvi moved forward and began lower herself to him as she reached out to touch him.
"No," Thorin warned as he grabbed her arm to prevent her from touching Fili.
Torvi hesitated as she met Thorin's eye but eventually nodded and took a step back to let Thorin lower himself and take in the sorry state of his nephew. Torvi watched as Thorin silently surveyed his sister's son before finally moving to touch him. He was cautious at first, but when Fili continued to remain oblivious to his touch he firmly grasped Fili and dragged him to his feet. Fili immediately struggled against Thorin's grasp but his attempts were feeble against Thorin's iron grip.
Without a word to Torvi he began making his way back through the hidden passageways leaving Torvi no choice but to silently follow behind in a nervous wreck. She wrung her hands franticly as she tried to bite back the words the begged to ask for answers she was not sure Thorin even had.
Fili continued to try and free himself, his mumbled words sounding more threatening but still indiscernible. Again everything became a blur for Torvi. One moment they walked through a darkened passage taking random twists and turns. At one point she acknowledge their ascent up a spiraling staircase until it finished in a long hall that came to an end. Thorin pressed against the wall and she was blinded by torchlight as the wall opened up to reveal that they had arrived to the royal wing.
As she stepped out after Thorin, the wall swung shut behind her causing a rush of cold air to cause a shiver down her back. They had entered the hall just before Fili's bedroom door. Kili paced back and forth in front of the door as Oín stood rummaging within a bag. The moment the door shut with a loud thud Kili stopped mid pace and looked at them while Oín looked up from his bags contents.
Both looked shocked from the state of Fili but neither questioned as they moved into action. Oín quickly opened the door as Kili took Fili's other side to help Thorin direct him into his room. Torvi followed after their wake but stopped as Thorin passed Fili fully on to Kili and blocked the doorway.
"Not you," he said with a shake of his head. "Stay out here."
"WHAT!?" Torvi questioned loudly, breaking out of her muted state. "NO! I need to be in there, I need to be with Fili, I need to know what is going on."
Thorin winced at the desperation that was in her voice but he knew he could not let her see Fili in this state. Fili would never forgive him.
"I am sorry Torvi, I promise I will explain later but right now it will be best if you just go home."
He kept his voice firm and did not meet her pleading eyes as he was afraid she would change his mind. Without another word, he swiftly shut the door. Torvi tried to move forward but it all happened too quickly. She was shaking her head in disagreement as she looked at a guilty looking Thorin then the wooden grain of the door was all that took up her vision. As the sound of the bolt being placed into its locked position rang in her ears she snapped out of her shock and moved into action. She slammed her hands against the door as her temper flared into action as she screamed and pleaded for Thorin to let her in.
Despite her pleas and threats, the door remained shut and after what seemed like hours her only reward was a hoarse voice. Exhaustion took over and she slumped against the door. Too tired to continue her pleas she fell silent as she let silent tears fall from her eyes as she quietly listened to hushed voices with the occasional outburst as Fili shouted nonsense. She hugged her knees and bowed her head as she tried not to focus on Fili's accusations. Every once in while she could make out a word or two but soon it all became a distant echo as she succumbed to sleep in the empty hallway.
Hey everyone! Sorry this chapter took so long and I am sorry its not super eventful. I promise things will pick up again after the next chapter. I was having a hard time finding the motivation and time to edit it. Finally today I decided to just do it so it was rushed and I apologize for mistakes or if it does not make sense. I have made alterations for how this story will go...again. I am hoping to have it all wrapped up in no more than ten more chapters.
I have several chapters that I already had written that just don't really work with the story anymore as I have changed the direction several times. Out of curiosity would anyone be interested in reading them? I am thinking of starting a compilation of what you could say are deleted scenes/one shots that get cut from my stories. I unfortunately already deleted the ones from my other completed story but would definitely have several from this story and from my next story that I will start posting when I finish this one.
Anyways hope you are all enjoying and I will try to get the next chapter up which should be the last slow paced chapter before things get begin to move forward again. Up next Fili and Torvi will finally make amends and start working together. Hope you all have a great week and to my fellow Americans have an amazing 4th of July! Enjoy your day of brunches, parades, BBQ/cookouts, and fireworks (usually all in that order).