Disclaimer - I do not own Total Drama, and Rikard and Anton do not represent the writers' views on homosexuals and cutters. In actual fact, he views homosexuals as diseased terrorists and cutters as selfish attention whores.
[toilet flushes] I'm back from the bathroom. What did I miss?
Disclaimer - Er...nothing
Confessional - He's been tellingeveryone that you hate homosexuals and cutters.
Arrrgh! bangs head against desk] Why do you exist!? All the readers must think I'm crazy to see me talking to a disclaimer and confessional! AAARRRRRGGGGHHHH!
Disclaimer - I know, the readers are so close-minded. Who could possibly think that you're crazy? Enjoy the chapter everyone! Sorry for the long wait...Fanfiction has been acting up
Euro-Drama Farmyard - Episode 9, Part 1 - Flinging Your Balls About
"Last time on Euro-Drama Roadtrip!" Lara began the recap. "The twenty nineremaining contestants had to find jigsaw puzzles which were scattered around the forest and put them all together to make their team logos.
Some such as Sveda and Marios were masters, while others such as Alma really ended up bringing out theircompetitive side."
The camerashows footage of Alma yelling at Symon to get more pieces.
"In theend, the Mantises came last, and after some extremely tight voting, it was Johannes who took the…let's call it the walk of shame.
Eightdown, and twenty…"
She used her fingers to count.
"…seven to go! But who will go next? Find out right now on Euro…Drama…Farmyard!"
(Zany Zebras)
"Yes! First place again!" Carolyn cheered as she and the other Zebras sat around their table in the mess hall.
"Such a shame we keep doing so well," Lousighed. There's somepeople here who deserve to leave."
Pavils rolled his eyes.
"Shut up, boy," Finn sighed asheput his armaround Sveda's shoulder. "We'retrying to have a good time."
"Sorry," Lou replied as hepicked up another carrot with his fork.
(Malicious Mantises)
"Ugh, I swear this food is getting worse every day," Tia groaned.
"You've said that threetimes. It's not that bad," Marios replied.
"Well, it is Aleksander's food. It's gone from brilliant to…okay," Tia replied. "These carrots…they're all rubbery."
Careto repeat that!?" Aleksander growled from thewindow between the mess hall and the kitchen.
"The food sucks!" Tia yelledstanding up on her chair. "There, I said it! I'm not afraid of you!"
A weakly thrown knife flew out of thewindow.
"Ooh, I'm so scared," Tia sneered as she picked up the knife and hurled it back at Aleksander.
Aleksanderducked and the knife soaredthrough thewindow and into the intern's mess hall, and it pricked Amanda's forehead.
"Eeeeekkkkk!" Amanda screamed shrilly as bloodstarted to drip from her forehead.
"I'll go get some salt!" Anka exclaimed, standing up and running off.
"I'll go make sure she doesn't do that," Mirzo added, walking after her.
"Sorry!" Tia called out.
Petros was laughing hysterically at this.
"What's so funny?" Tiaasked, raising an eyebrow as she sat back down.
"Oh nothing," Petros replied as hecontinued to eat.
"Okay…" Tia replied awkwardly.
[Confessional: Petros backwards is sorted...well, almost
Tia (Bulgaria): They're both awkward, they're both weak, and they look pretty alike.
Heck, Petros and Timotei…I mean…ugh, never mind.]
Later that night, the Zebras and the Sharks were lounging around the pool.
Symon was resting against a rock when Alma walked over to him.
"Hey, Symon," she greeted, sitting down beside him.
"Er…hi," Symon replied awkwardly, sitting up.
"I'm sorry for yelling at you today," she said. "Uh…you know how much I love winning."
"It's fine," Symon assured her.
"So…" Alma struggled to think of something else to say.
Thankfully, the awkward pause was broken when Emilia yelled, "Hey look, it's the Felines!"
She and Lou ran over, and some of the others also followed.
"R-r-r-role call!" Emilia exclaimed.
"I'm Rikard!" Rikard squealed, jumping towards her and striking a pose.
After a couple of seconds he turned around. Nobody else looked as if they were about to join in.
Stela shook her head in disapproval.
"Buzzkills," Rikard groaned, before walking off.
"So, who left?" Lou asked.
"Well…" Emilia began. "Stela's here, Katerina's here, Anton's here, Beni's here, Estrella's here, Luko's here and…oh, I'm so sorry."
"I don't even get how it happened," Luko sighed. "He did really well in the challenge."
"It was a tight vote, dude," Beni told him. "Anyone could have left."
"I know, but why him?" Luko asked rhetorically. "You know what, I think I'll just go back to the cabin."
He walked past Pavils, who was sitting on the grass, and he said, "I'm sorry about that."
This made Luko walk faster.
[Confessional: Luko was a favourite to win last season – in retrospect, I'm surprised more people didn't suggest Adrijana. Did people think she was too obvious?
Pavils (Latvia): How can Luko still be mad at me? Lou, I can understand, but Luko?
It's been a year since I tried to abandon you! Get over it!
Didn't Johannes trick you into giving him a piggyback once?
Luko (Serbia): I can forgive people most of the time, but trying to abandon me when I was unconscious?
So not cool!]
(Zany Zebras)
"It's 10pm! You all have fifteen minutes to sleep!" Farmer Bogas shouted through a megaphone.
Finn and Sveda were cuddling each other on the porch when the rest of the team walked over.
"Hey!" Sveda exclaimed. "They brought the…screen thingy!"
"The TV and the DVDs," Finn corrected.
"Good," Carolyn smiled, and she walked over and picked up the boxes. "So…we got Beauty and the Beast, Cinderella, Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs, The Little Mermaid, Pocahontas and…Saludos Amigos?"
"Oh yeah, it's a collection of short stories. I think they're all set in Brazil," Lou commented. Carolyn looked him in surprise.
"What?" Lou shrugged. "My parents collected them all on VHS."
"So, how are we going to decide who gets it?" Emilia asked.
"You girls can take it," Finn said. "I'm not really into Disney, myself."
"And I've seen them all before," Lou added.
"Well, I guess it's ours then!" Carolyn exclaimed excitedly.
She ran into the cabin with the DVDs, and Ilene picked up the TV and the plug and followed her.
[Confessional: One of the stories in 'Saludos Amigos' is set in Chile, while the rest were in Brazil so…Lou was almost right.
Marios (Greece): Why are they promoting Disney films on Cartoon Network? Is there some kind of alliance between the two companies?
I dunno, maybe to undermine Nickelodeon?]
(Shady Sharks)
"Hey, look, there's a box of teabags," Hadi commented as he and the other members of the Shady Sharks walked over to their cabin.
"I think the other teams have already had it," Agnessa said. "There's a note saying we all have to drink one, and we'll have a good night's sleep and a dream about the past."
"That sounds nice," Alma commented.
"It sounds a bit risky if you ask me," Symon stated, picking up the box. "Oh well, if I must."
Berto yawned, "Augh! I'm getting tired."
"I'll go get some hot water from the kitchen," Jessie offered sweetly. "Because I'm so nice."
"Uh-huh," Berto said uncertainly as he rubbed his eyes.
"We're not allowed in the mess hall," Alma pointed out. "We only came third. We can heat some water on the stove."
"Yeah…no," Jessie responded. "Don't worry. I'll find a way."
She walked off with that.
[Confessional: The author yawns simply from typing the word 'yawn' (and when I edited this, I also yawned)
Aleksander (Albania): [he holds a raw steak to his eye] I hate my life.
By the way, I didn't get a black eye from Jessie. Lara has instructed Anka to injure me if I break any rules – and apparently letting losers into the mess hall is one of them, because that's legal for her to do.
[he groans] Aren't loopholes a bitch?]
And now, we will see the dreams of the Sharks. Not really sure how this could be re-enacted and aired on TV, but you can leave that to your imaginations.
(Agnessa – 2 years ago)
"Bluh," a fifteen year old Agnessa gagged as she continued to walk along the streets of Minsk. "I am starving!"
She came across a large house with bushes of blackberries.
"Well, better than nothing," she shrugged, and she walked through the gate and started picking fruit from the bushes.
Suddenly, an alarm sounded from inside the house, and a large old man came out the front door with a crowbar.
"Get out of my garden, you little slut!" he screamed. Agnessa couldn't understand what he was saying because it was Belarusian, but she could sense it was a good time to leave, and she immediately ran for it.
"GET BACK HERE!" the old man screamed, chasing after her.
(Hadi – 10 months ago)
Hadi walked along the sidewalk confidently.
It was his first day at his new school, and he couldn't feel more happy.
As he walked across the sidewalk, he spotted Tamon one the opposite side, being confronted by two of his former henchmen.
"Guys, come on!" Tamon protested, waving a 100 shekel bill. "Leave me alone and it's all yours."
One of the henchmen grabbed it before saying, "Sorry, but there's no excuse for what you did."
"Yeah, you got kicked in the nuts by a girl," the other henchman added.
"It wasn't my fault…GAH!" Tamon screamed as one of them gave him an atomic wedgie.
"Sucks to be him," Hadi chuckled, before walking off.
He came to the school, and he saw two tall blonde girls taunting a smaller girl who was wearing a headscarf.
"Hey, Sarah, look at what Hanesha's wearing," one girl said, nudging her friend.
"I know, right, Mickaela," Sarah agreed. "Did this dress belong to your grandma?"
"Uh…" Hanesha said nervously.
"I'll take that as great-grandma," Sarah said, and she and Mickaela let out the most annoying laughter ever – it sounded very much like a car-horn.
"Hey, leave her alone!" Hadi yelled, stomping over.
"Ooh, look, Hanesha has a boyfriend," Mickaela taunted.
"Wha…I don't know her," Hadi protested.
"Hang on, I thought Jake was Hanesha's boyfriend," Sarah said, nudging Mickaela.
"Ooh, looks like Hanesha is a player!" Mickaela taunted.
"I heard my name!" a blonde boy said loudly, doing a somersault before landing right in front of Sarah and Mickaela. "Are you girls interested in me?"
"Ew, no, you're gross!" Sarah gagged.
"I know, but check out my sexy guns," Jake said in a creepy voice, rolling up his sweatshirt and showing off his biceps, which were decently sized.
"We're out of here," the two girls sighed, leaving the three of them alone.
"Hey, I'm Jake," Jake greeted, grabbing Hadi's hand and giving it a shake. "I moved here three years ago from Los Angeles, and this is my girlfriend, Hanesha."
"Stop telling everyone," Hanesha hissed. "If my dad finds out…"
"Relax, Hanesha," Jake said calmly. "Deep breath, deep breath, all good!"
Jake turned his head to Hadi.
"Er…my name is…" Hadi began.
"Hey, I know you! You're Hadi from Euro-Drama!" Jake exclaimed excitely. "I'm such a huge fan! Can I have your autograph?"
"Yeah, I'm sorta getting used to being famous so…sorry, I'll pass," Hadi said.
"Oh," Jake sighed, putting his hands in his pockets. "So…I'm guessing a selfie is out of the question?"
"Hmm, maybe later," Hadi shrugged.
(Symon – 9 months ago)
Symon slowly walked across the corridor with his head facing the ground.
"Hey, Symon," greeted a short and muscular boy, giving him a punch in the arm.
"What do you want, Krylo?" Symon said dryly.
"Well, just wondering, what are you meant to be today?" Krylo asked.
"I'm just me," Symon sighed. "S****y old me."
"You said it," Krylo agreed. "Well, I'll catch you later…not."
With that, he walked off.
"D**khead," Symon muttered, before also stomping off.
(Alma – eight months ago)
Alma was sitting at a lunch table outside reading a university textbook.
"Hey, Alma, I didn't see you at small break," greeted a tall and thin girl with shaggy brown hair.
"Hey, Klara. Oh yeah, I stayed in to read," Alma replied.
"Again? Alma, you need to get a social life," Klara pleaded.
She looked at the book Alma was reading.
"What's this about?" Klara asked, looking a little concerned.
"Plastic surgery," Alma stated. "For ages I've been trying to figure out which branch of medicine I'd like to learn more about, and I've decided I'd like to be a plastic surgeon."
"Er…why?" Klara asked, raising an eyebrow.
"It just fascinates me how they can alter someone's body," Alma answered. "I wonder if I could try this out on Symon."
"Isn't that dangerous?" Klara said, now looking very concerned.
"If I study it hard enough, it won't be," Alma replied.
"Okaaaaay, I'm scared now," Klara stated, her eyes widened, and she slowly backed off.
"Chapter 19," Alma read to herself. "Ear lobes."
(Berto – 2 weeks ago)
Berto sat on a boat in a wide river with a small boy with dark blonde hair.
"Uh, can we turn back now?" the boy asked.
"No, Danilo! I'm going to Slovenia in a week, and I will catch it before that!" Berto yelled triumphantly as he leaned over the boat with a fishing rod.
Danilo had been Berto's best friend since he was three, and he was a very reserved person, and Berto was always dragging him on adventures.
"I have been trying to catch one of these since I first crawled on a boat!" Berto exclaimed. "I will catch it today! Hang on! HANG ON!"
He quickly pulled back the reel on his fishing rod, and a large fish with whiskers splashed out of the water (drenching Berto and Danilo) and landed on the boat.
"I DID IT!" Berto screamed, making Danilo block his ears. "I CAUGHT A CATFISH!"
"Congrats," Danilo said quietly as he tried to shake the water out of his hair. "Can we…uh…go home now?"
"Finally," Berto said in a baby voice as he hugged the fish. "I am going to take you home, and me and my dad are going to mount you to the wall. Yes we are. Yes we are!"
Danilo very freaked out at this, and he was too shocked to speak. How could his friend act like this to an animal he was about to kill?
(Jessie – 11 months ago)
"Hey, girls, guess who's back?" Jessie bragged as she staggered over to two girls, who were dressed in punk clothing.
"Hey, look, Donna, it's the girl who got herself voted off first," one of the girls said, punching her friend in the arm.
"Hey, Marcia, it wasn't my fault! That guy from…ugh…one of those little countries no one cares about…" Jessie protested.
"Whatever. Look Jessie, we're sick of you!" Donna yelled. "We're rebels because we want to do what we please. You, on the other, just seem to rebel for the sake of it."
"What?" Jessie protested.
"Yeah," Marcia agreed. "Remember when you broke your nose after you walked on that wet floor?"
"But…" Jessie hesitated to respond.
"And remember when you beat up that five year old at the arcade?" Donna added.
"Whatever," Jessie snapped.
"We're going to the park. Follow us," Marcia said sourly.
"Don't tell me what to do," Jessie said angrily, stomping off.
After a few seconds of walking, she stopped.
"What the hell am I doing?" she asked herself.
She turned back, and ran up to Donna and Marcia.
"Hey, wait up!" she exclaimed.
The other two girls both looked at each other and smirked, before turning around and bursting with applause.
"What did I do?" Jessie asked in confusion.
"Congratulations! You learned to think for yourself!" Donna cheered.
"You're free!" Marcia added, still continuing to clap.
"Okay, stop it," Donna said, slapping Marcia's hand. "Now, come on, let's go help out at the library."
"Uh…you're kidding, right?" Jessie said hopefully.
"Of course, duh," Donna sighed. "I have a fake ID with me. Wanna go buy some fags?"
"Now you're talkin'!" Jessie exclaimed, and the three of them staggered off.
(Back to life, back to reality...)
Anton walked out of his team's cabin and stretched his arms.
"Hi, Anton," greeted Stela, who was leaning against the wall of the porch.
"Oh, hi," Anton greeted.
"How are you and Rikard doing?" Stela asked.
"Er…fine," Anton replied, before walking over and coming close enough that they almost touched.
"I need to know how to get things to work out," he whispered.
"Please step back," Stela sighed, and Anton did so.
"So, what do I do?" Anton asked.
"Just tell him how you feel," Stela said. "You have plenty of time to talk to him. Didn't you do the challenge together yesterday?"
"Yeah," Anton sighed. "It was super awkward. They probably didn't air it on TV. And…don't you think that's a bit forward."
Stela facepalmed. "I keep having to repeat the same things over and over. This is RIKARD you're talking about! He's about as forward as it gets."
"Hey, I heard my name," Rikard said as he walked out of the cabin. "What's going on?"
"I'll leave you two alone to work things out," Stela stated, and she walked down the steps.
"So…" Rikard said, putting his hands in his pockets.
"Yeah…" Anton replied awkwardly.
"We haven't really said much to each other," Rikard stated. "The challenge yesterday…"
"Mm-hmm," Anton nodded. "So, I wanted to ask you something…er…how do I put this?"
"Er…is this about…uh…I don't want to guess wrong," Rikard sighed.
"Do you feel the same way!?" Anton exclaimed quickly, before putting his hands to his mouth.
"What?" Rikard said, raising an eyebrow.
"That kiss!" Anton exclaimed. "I've…I've never felt so…it was like sparks flew…ugh, I'm not saying this right."
"No, it's okay. I understand," Rikard nodded. "But, you know…Beni…"
"Yeah," Anton nodded. "You know, take your time with your decision. If it…mmmm!"
Rikard had just grabbed Anton and started making out with him.
It lasted for about five seconds, and then they came apart.
"I…I felt it again!" Anton exclaimed, a huge smile on his face.
"I know. I felt it too," Rikard replied. "And, if you makes you feel good, I've kissed Beni, and I didn't feel the same way."
"So…" Anton said hopefully.
"Are you…" Rikard began, before shaking his head. "Oh! I don't know! I mean…argh!"
"I'm really lost for words," he groaned.
"You don't need words," Anton said in a deep tone. "All you need to say is one word. Yes or no."
"Huh…wha…eh…" Rikard said hesitantly, before taking a deep breath and saying, "Yes!"
"Yes?" Anton repeated hopefully.
"Yes," Rikard smiled.
"So, you'll be my boyfriend," Anton smiled.
"Yes," Rikard replied.
"And not Beni's," Anton added.
"Yes."
"Do you wanna go have a date in the woods?" Anton asked.
"Yes."
"Are you only going to say yes from now on?" Anton said, raising an eyebrow.
"Yes," Rikard replied emotionlessly.
"Can I slit scars on your stomach?" Anton asked.
"Yes…I mean, what? No!" Rikard exclaimed, looking a little disgusted.
"I know. I was just trying to wake you up," Anton chuckled. "But…maybe you should tell Beni now."
"You're right," Rikard sighed. "Should get it over with."
With that, Rikard walked back into the cabin.
"Hey, how are you doing?" Beni asked Luko as they finished getting dressed.
"You know what, I'll be fine," Luko smiled. "Johannes would want me to keep going. So, how are you feeling? You know – the whole love triangle thing?"
"You know, I was cool with it at first, but now it's just scaring me," Beni sighed. "How am I supposed to say no to one of them? The whole thing…it's driving me insane. Even more insane than I already am, and I didn't know that was possible."
Luko laughed a little at that.
"Well, I'm sure you'll make a decision," he assured him.
"I dunno," Beni sighed. "I just…I wish I had a sign."
Just then, Rikard walked into the cabin.
"Hey guys," he said.
"Hey," they both replied.
"Er, Beni, I need to talk to you," Rikard said.
"Oh, okay," Beni nodded.
"So…I hope you don't react too badly to this but…" Rikard took a deep breath, before turning around. "Er…Luko? Would you mind leaving?"
"Sure," Luko nodded, and he walked out of the cabin.
"Alright," Beni said. "What did you want to tell me?"
"Well…" Rikard took another deep breath. "I'm sorry, but I can't date you."
"Oh," Beni nodded.
"So…you're not mad?" Rikard asked.
"No," Beni smiled. "So, any reason? You don't have to answer."
Rikard sighed, "See. I think…maybe…I'm getting together with Anton."
"Oh," Beni nodded. "That's cool. I completely understand."
"I'm glad you do," Rikard smiled. "I'll see you later. I'm going to down to the lake."
"Alright. I'll just hang here for a bit," Beni replied, and Rikard walked off with that.
A couple of seconds later, Luko walked back in.
"Yes!" Beni cheered, jumping up and down in excitement. "YES-YES-YES-YES-YESSSSS!"
"Why are you so happy?" Luko asked.
"Rikard has decided not to date me! He hooked up with Anton!" Beni exclaimed excitedly. "I'm free from this love triangle! Go me! Look at me – I'm a one woman man! Yahoo!"
"Congratulations!" Luko exclaimed, clapping his hands. "So…what are you gonna do first?"
"Tell Estrella," Beni replied. "Boy will she be happy."
He began to walk out the door, but then he stopped and turned back.
"Well, maybe I shouldn't tell her right away that Rikard said no to me," he stated.
"Are you sure that's a good idea?" Luko asked.
"Why wouldn't it be?" Beni asked. "It would kind of ruin the moment."
"Yeah, but sometimes if you tell one lie, then you end up telling more," Luko warned him. "I'm not just saying that. I've had experience."
"I know, I know," Beni sighed as he corrected his hat. "I just…you know what? I won't tell her unless she asks. Good idea?"
"Sounds good to me," Luko shrugged. "Good luck. I better go get breakfast."
"Wow, it's already 9 o'clock!" Beni exclaimed, looking at the clock on the wall. "Farmer Bogas forgot to wake us up today."
"Yeah, I know," Luko agreed. "I wonder how he's doing."
[Confessional: Wake up – it's a shitiful morning!
Farmer Bogas (Slovenia, Co-Host): It's the lack of cigarettes! It's getting to me!
I cannot function properly without them! I need my stimulants!
ARRRRGHH!
Tyge (Norway): [he laughs hysterically]
Wow, this is just sad! But don't worry, my dad got over it, and so shall he.]
"Okay, everyone, it's challenge time!" Lara announced, once again standing on a rock with a megaphone.
The interns, staff and eliminated contestants were all standing on the grass behind her.
"Hi," Luko whispered to Johannes, and Johannes tipped his hat back at him.
"Hey, no interacting with the interns!" Lara yelled, pointing a finger at the Serbian guy.
"Hey, wait up!" Beni exclaimed, running up next to Estrella. "I've got something I want to tell you."
"You picked me over Rikard?" Estrella asked with a raised eyebrow.
"Yeah…how did you know?" Beni asked, looking a little nervous as he scratched the back of his neck.
"I saw Rikard and Anton holding hands," Estrella replied. "I'm guessing he said no to you."
"Yeah," Beni sighed. "But the good news is, now we can be boyfriend and girlfriend!"
"Yeah, I know! That's great!" Estrella exclaimed, but she did so, if this makes sense, three-quarter-heartedly.
"You don't sound too excited. What's wrong?" Beni asked.
"Oh you know, this is great and all but…" Estrella sighed. "How did I explain this?"
"Do you feel like…I dunno what's the word…a rebound?" Beni asked.
"A little bit," Estrella replied.
"See, there's this thing you have to know about me," Beni said, holding Estrella's wrist. "For many people, who you date is all about gender. But not for me. For me, I feel love for people who I sense love me back."
"That's so sweet," Estrella giggled.
"Now that Rikard likes someone else, I see him as no more than a friend," Beni shrugged.
[Confessional: You've got a friend in me. But I'd rather f**k someone hotter!
Beni (Moldova): I wasn't lying either. I get chased by girls on an almost daily basis, and every one of them only goes after me because…apparently I'm what they call 'hot'
[uses finger quotes]
Keep in mind, these are the same girls who used to bully me when I was a kid because I used to have a bowl haircut, and I'd go to school every day dressed as a wizard – I used to think I had magical powers.
Estrella, on the other hand, is different. I can relate to her so easily. She's so full of life, and she looks so unique, and…I mean this in the nicest way possible…a freak.]
"I love you," said Estrella, and she grabbed Beni and they had a proper kiss which lasted five seconds.
"Alright, now that you're all here!" Lara continued, waving her arm. "It's time for a couple of announcements."
"Kissing. It's better than any medicine I've ever come across," Alma said, tapping Symon's arm.
"You can't understand no, can you?" Symon chuckled.
"Not in my vocabulary," Alma replied.
"Okay, you know what? Meet me in the woods after the challenge, or after elimination if we lose, and we can discuss things," Symon replied.
"Sounds perfect," Alma smiled, and she grabbed Symon and planted a kiss on his cheek. Well, technically his ski mask but whatever.
"Okay, it's time for me to make a couple of announcements!" Lara exclaimed. "There will be a bit of…re-arranging."
A bit of faint response could be heard to that.
"First of all, the team with the least amount of members – the Shady Sharks – is now disbanded," Lara continued.
There was a bit of surprise at that prospect.
[Confessional: Looks like the mammals and insects have beaten the fish!
Agnessa (Belarus): Well, that's a bit of a shock. Still, I'm glad I'll likely be away from…[she grits her teeth in disgust]…Jessie.]
"There will be a challenge later to assign you to your new teams, and since that isn't really enough of a twist," Lara added.
…
…
…
"…the other teams will be re-arranged a bit too. That's right – each team captain will have to cut loose one of their own."
The three team captains were shocked by this.
"And since the Zebras have an extra player, they will be cutting two people loose," Lara added.
Ilene looked as if she was about to faint.
"With that, we'll go to Beni first! Who do you wish to send to another team?"
"Uh…" Beni said nervously. "Hmm…"
[Confessional: As twisted as Tilly from Tweenabet!
Beni (Moldova): I really didn't want to have to do this…]
"Katerina," Beni sighed.
"What!?" Katerina exclaimed in shock.
"I'm really sorry but…" Beni said nervously before pointing at Anton. "You're sort of affecting his health."
"Oh, I understand," Katerina sighed. "Come on, Kelija."
"Well, it was good while it lasted," Stela said, looking at Kelija, who stuck out her tongue.
[Confessional: Things can only get better for our Polish emo…
Anton (Poland): Yes! Yes-yes-yes-yes-yes-yes! First I get a boyfriend, and now my allergies are over!
[he folds his arms and sighs]
Interesting how my life seems to get better without me trying.]
"Ilene, you're next," Lara announced. "Who are you cutting loose?"
[Confessional: Footloose!
Ilene (Belgium): How could I say goodbye to anyone? Emilia and Lou are a couple, and Adrijana and Carolyn are their friends.
Finn and Sveda are a couple, and Finn is Pavils' only friend.
What to do?]
Ilene took a breath and said, "I volunteer myself. Is that allowed?"
"Sure," Lara nodded.
The other members of the team were surprised by this decision.
"Okay, you still have to kick off someone else though."
"Er…um…uh…" A tear fell from Ilene's eye.
"Come on, Ilene," Lou begged, gesturing towards Pavils.
"Hey, no influencing her!" Lara snapped.
"You never said…" Adrijana protested.
"UP-BUP-BUP!" Lara interrupted.
"Carolyn," Ilene blurted out.
"Carolyn it is!" Lara exclaimed.
"Uh…sorry…" Ilene said regretfully, looking at Carolyn with eyes of red.
"Don't worry about it," Carolyn smiled.
"And finally, Tyge, who are you ridding of?" Lara asked.
"Hmm…that's tough," Tyge said hesitantly. "Who to pick?"
[Confessional: Dun-dun-dun!
Tyge (Norway): I'm definitely not picking Sanna and Marios is my friend.
Vincenz and Eloise are making friends so I wouldn't split them.
[he sighs] I guess it's between…]
Tyge looked between Petros and Tia for a moment before finally saying, "Petros."
"Eh, whatever," Petros shrugged, and he corrected his toque and joined the other people who had been eliminated from their teams.
"Okay, now each team is down to six players, and it's time for me to explain the procedure for assigning the new teams," Lara announced. "Remaining Felines, Zebras and Mantises, stay here, and everybody else follow me."
[Confessional: 'Cuz we need a little…controversy!
Emilia (Netherlands): That was a surprising twist. It was brave of Ilene to volunteer, but there were better choices.
Lou (Cyprus): Really Ilene? You couldn't have cut Pavils? Ugh!]
"Okay, looks like we got back before her," Intern #3 stated as she, the other three interns and the eliminated contestants brought in a funfair unit – one of those 'Roll-a-Ball' Horse Games – hopefully you know what I'm talking about.
"Oh, they always have this at the bazaar!" Emilia exclaimed. "I always lose, but it's still fun."
"I'm sure you've all seen one of these," Intern #8 stated. "The first three people on each team to finish get to pick one of ten prizes, and the fourth person on any team wins the leftover prize.
And here come the prizes now…"
The ten teamless contestants came waddling over. Their arms and legs were all handcuffed to each other.
"Oh, wow!" Adrijana exclaimed in amusements.
"One, two," everyone in chain muttered as they all walked together in rhythm. "One, two, one…GAH!"
Jessie decided to fall over and send crashing with her for a cheap laugh.
"Ugh, you are so annoying!" Berto, who was in front of her, yelled.
"Yeah, not cool!" Alma added. "Right, Symon?"
Symon, meanwhile, was laughing hysterically and Alma raised an eyebrow at him.
"What? It was kind of funny," Symon chuckled.
"Pipe down, slaves!" Lara exclaimed, clapping her hands.
"Slaves?" Emilia repeated.
"Pipe down?" Adrijana repeated.
"Okay, here's the challenge…"
"Oh, I already explained," Intern #3 said, raising her hand.
"You suck," was Lara's reply before she stomped off.
"How professional," Intern #3 said dryly.
"Okay, eighteen people still on teams, take one of the seats and we will give you your balls – no innuendo intended!" Intern #3 exclaimed. "As I mentioned earlier, the first three winners on each team get to pick one of these 10… slaves… apparently.
Also, one more thing before we begin, unless there are no other options, you cannot pick someone who was previously on your team."
There were some groans at that.
[Confessional: Well, wouldn't that be boring?
Sveda (Azerbaijan): [Azeri swear word]! I was hoping to use Caorlyn's 'traumatic event' to gain her trust in some way.
Oh well – all I needed to do now is pick a vulnerable ally.]
"Ready…steady…go!" Intern #2 yelled, and they all started trying to roll their wooden balls into the right holes.
Some such as Emilia, Pavils and Estrella were flinging theirs about carelessly, while others such as Marios, Anton and Sveda were putting more effort into being accurate.
[Confessional: What's wrong with flinging your balls about carelessly?
Petros (Armenia): It's a bit of shame I didn't get to be in this challenge, because I am really good at anything with accuracy.
Well, besides archery. I'm not even strong enough to pull the bow…pathetic, huh?
[he chuckles as he adjusts his toque]]
"And we have our first place!" Intern #8 announced. "Anton!"
"What? Really!?" Anton exclaimed. "Hey, I actually won something!"
"Congrats!" Rikard exclaimed excitedly as he continued to focus on his.
"That's right! Who do you pick?" Intern #8 asked.
"Hmm…tricky," Anton stated.
"Pick quickly, before someone else finishes!" Intern #3 shouted.
"Ack…Carolyn!" Anton exclaimed.
"Carolyn, you are now part of Ferocious Felines!" Intern #7 announced. "We will give prizes later."
"Finished!" Marios exclaimed. "And I pick Katerina."
"Yay!" Katerina cheered, causing the chains to clang harder.
"The Greek chooses the FYROMian," Adrijana commented.
"Hey, that's offensive!" Katerina yelled.
"Whatever," Adrijana sighed, as her ball landed in another correct hole.
"Stela is finished!" Intern #3 announced.
"Petros!" Stela exclaimed.
Petros was surprised by this, but he smiled soon after.
[Confessional: Hey, wanna see my flusher?
Stela (Romania): I think it was logical. We need someone smart on the team. The last two challenges were mental and we lost them both!]
"Finished!" Sveda sang. "Oh, but I don't know their names. You…Ankara, is it?"
"It's Jessie," Jessie said dryly.
[Confessional: I think Istan-bull would have been more fitting.
Jessie (Italy): It really annoys me when people compare me to that…retard! At least I have a brain!
Anka (Montenegro): How dare she! I am not a city in…
[she pauses]
Where is Ankara? I know it's one of those Muslim terrorist places but…ugh…I hate Geography
Finn (Ireland): Jessie's a bad itch from what I've seen. Hopefully she doesn't try to manipulate my Sveda.
Jessie (Italy): By the way, I'm glad that idiot picked me! She, Finn and Pavils look like perfect allies.
Sveda (Azerbaijan): It was a wise choice.
Judging from Jessie's habits so far in this game, she'll be an easy ally.
She's probably thinking the same thing about Finn, Pavils and I'll let her.]
"Adrijana is fifth to finish!" Intern #3 announced. "Please take your pick!"
"I dunno…" Adrijana shrugged. "Alma?"
"Good choice," Symon muttered.
"I believe I am also finished," Vincenz said calmly. "And I select Ilene."
"So from here on, Ilene will be a Mantis and Alma will be a Zebra," Intern #3 stated. "Play on!"
[Confessional: Well, Mantises are very lean
Vincenz (Switzerland): Ilene's a girl who could use a bit of self-esteem and hopefully I can help her.
Eloise is already lightening up a bit since we started meditating together, and she's stopped taking her past traumas out on other people
[he puts his hands together as if to pray]
May the Lord's power be with me always
Eloise (France): Hmm – she might be an easy ally.
Ilene (Belgium): Oh…I really hope I fit in on this team]
"Done!" Lou cheered as his ball fell into a hole one more time.
"Lou gets the Zebras their third prize!" Intern #2 announced. "You have four choices."
"I'll have to go with Symon," Lou shrugged, giving Alma a wink.
"Oh, you," Alma smiled.
[Confessional: Let's hope Lou doesn't give shitty love advice like his girlfriend
Alma (Croatia): Thanks a million, Lou! Looks like Symon won't be escaping my love! Hahaha!
[she groans]
I really hope I'm not coming off as too creepy.
Sveda (Azerbaijan): So, Symon and Alma are on the team too. I don't really care. They're just swing votes anyway.]
The contestants who still hadn't finished were still battling it out for one of the three remaining 'slaves'
"Who will finish next?" Intern #2 pondered.
"I do! I do!" Sanna cheered.
"Sanna, who do you pick?" Intern #3 asked.
"Agnessa," Sanna stated.
"WHAT!?" Eloise screamed before shaking her head.
"Wow, this game is hard," she added quickly.
Agnessa gulped at this.
"I am also done!" Tyge announced, rising from his seat.
"Congrats. The Mantises will get whoever is left over. But you'll have to see once another Feline…"
"Done!" Rikard exclaimed.
"Okay, who do you pick?" Intern #3 asked. "Berto or Hadi?"
"Berto," Rikard said almost immediately.
"Aw," Berto moaned.
"Rikard and Berto sitting in a tree," Jessie teased. "K-I-S-I…NNOOOOWWW!"
Berto had just elbowed her in the stomach.
"That is no way to treat a lady!" Jessie scoffed.
"Guess who else is a rebel," Berto replied sarcastically.
"Okay, Berto is now a Feline, which means Hadi will be a Mantis. I will set you all free in a few moments and you'll have some time to bond in your new teams and then we'll go straight into today's challenge! See you then."
[Confessional: Two 'S's! Two 'S's! There are two 'S's in KISSING you retard!
Hadi (Israel): I'm surprised I was picked last. Am I really of that little worth?
Poor Agnessa, though. Having Eloise on the same team again…I hope she doesn't make me throw another challenge.
Eloise has been quiet from what I've seen this season. Marios did say she'd…ugh, I'd rather not assume things.]
Hope that was worth the wait. Come back next chapter
By the way, Jessie's friends are named after the antagonists of a certain children's book - virtual cookie to whoever can guess it!
Until next time...