So...this is late. And I am sorry about that. However, the forces of the universe teamed up against this: I got a concussion the week I was going to update and missed my JV quarter finals, then we lost our JV semi-finals when I finally did get to play and then I got stuck babysitting these four little boys who I've simultanously there was a snowday on Friday and I built a snowfort. :D anyway, sorry about the delay, kids. And happy belated snowday, my tri-state area friends.

Xoxo

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Chapter 21

"What is this?" I wondered aloud as I frowned at the paper pinned to the bulletin board in the Gryffindor Common Room. "A Self-Defense Seminar, required for all first through fifth years, February 27 at six o'clock? That's tonight." I turned to frown at James, and he just shrugged wordlessly. "Why?" I asked, my voice barely audible over the din of voices: there was literally like, twenty kids all clambering to see what had been posted. Everyone had assumed that this was the new Hogsmeade dates, but no, just something weirder.

It had been almost two weeks since Valentine's Day, and thankfully, Louis and James and Rory had long stopped teasing me over the disaster that was February 14th. To be entirely fair though, we'd had to declare a truce, because someone (it'd been Edie, but the boys were unaware of this, so I wasn't telling) had sent Rory one of those tiny dwarfs with the bow and arrows and songs, except Rory was actually really bothered by it (shocking, yes, I know), so he wouldn't let it sing. He'd silencio'd it. Which was, in all technicality, illegal. But once more, we weren't telling. So Rory had been followed about all day by a dwarf who wanted nothing more than to sing to him. And then his brother had caught on--Rory's brother was in fourth year with Wes--and had been so excited at the prospect of mocking Rory for the rest of his life that he'd stalked us around the school. It'd been actually the funniest thing I'd ever seen--but Rory still insisted that my singing valentines in herbology somehow beat that. Which had been determinedly proven wrong when his extremely earnest but silenced dwarf wrote on a classroom wall, in red paint, the song he'd been hired to sing. Rory's face turned so red that we thought he might pass out.

I don't think I've ever laughed so hard.

Anyway, we'd called a truce to never talk about either incident ever again. Which was good, because I had enough to think about: James's birthday was the twenty-eighth, and even though I'd discussed it with Louis and decided not to openly celebrate James's birthday, I was getting him a present, and, as had to be carefully explained to Louis, I had to get him a good present because this was his first birthday of our friendship. And I had made happen the best present ever: a signed beater's bat of Charlie Charapko of the Falmouth Falcons, who had been MVP of the Great Britain & Ireland League three times. James was actually obsessed with the man. And I had campaigned Mrs. Potter to talk to Oliver Wood, who she knew because of her time as a Holyhead Harpie, who worked at the Ministry as the head of the Department of Magical Gaming and Sports. And he had gotten it for Mrs. Potter in a heartbeat, who'd sent it to me with a super-sweet note about what good friends we were.

"Because someone went and got herself beaten up over Winter Break--thanks, Sera." Daisy said sarcastically, and I spun my head to glare at her. Daisy smirked knowingly, and James glared at her wordlessly through the crowd: he hadn't heard what she'd said because of the noise around us, but he knew it hadn't been pleasant. James grabbed my hand and we began to disentangle ourselves from the crowd, and I rewarded him with a grateful smile. But Daisy had none of it, following us until we were standing by ourselves outside the crowded mass of people reading the bulletin board. "Now you've inconvenienced the entire school. I hope you're pleased with yourself." Daisy snorted. "You probably think you're some brave hero now that you've survived these attacks, but it's just luck and the teachers know it. Hence this stupid seminar." She waved her hand in the vague direction of the bulletin board.

"Oh, shut up, Daisy." I muttered, rolling my eyes. "I've got nothing to do with it and you know it. This is bigger than any single kid."

"Then why is this happening for the first time ever?" Daisy asked searingly, pulling her shoulders back as she met my gaze confidently. "This should have started years ago, then, if it has nothing to do with a certain first year whose getting stalked by a bunch of criminals." Daisy raised her eyebrows in a challenge, pursing her lips as she crossed her arms across her chest. "Didn't start when Harry Potter was getting attacked by Voldemort. But you and your brother and your stupid mother who doesn't exist and your drunkard of a father who abandoned you send the school into some sort--"

"Don't ever talk about my parents that way again." I hissed at her, taking a step forward as my eyes narrowed. "You don't have any idea what the hell you're talking about—"

"But it's all over the papers," Daisy retorted cruelly. "I know you've seen it—you don't even know your mother's name—"

"Shut up." I said angrily, straightening up.

"You don't—"

"Sera told you to shut up." James said angrily, his eyes dark as he stepped between Daisy and me. He glared fiercely at Daisy, and my roommate glared back at him defiantly for a moment, before her chin wobbled and her eyes filled with tears. She whirled around, taking off for the girls' dormitories. We both watched her go before James turned to me, his eyes focusing in on mine acutely. I just met his gaze evenly, taking a deep breath. James and I stood in silence in a moment before he spoke: "Merlin, she's such a delight." He muttered sarcastically, and I glanced away. James straightened up, looking angrier. "She's just trying to mess with your head, Sera, you know that." His voice was uncharacteristically soft, and I smiled weakly at my best friend, pulling my hair out of my face and pulling it all to one side: I always fiddled with my hair when I was uncomfortable. "It's not even true."

"Not necessarily." I protested quietly. A frown marred James's features, but I continued. "Just because she's obnoxious doesn't make her wrong, Jamie."

"But she is." James insisted. I looked away, swallowing, before I looked back up at James, licking my lips once before I spoke.

"I don't know my mom's name." I said finally. "And I am getting attacked left and right. And your dad and Dean and Louis's dad all talked to the school about better practical training for the younger kids after the Diagon Alley attack." I ran a tired hand through my hair. "She's not wrong." I finished softly.

"She's not right," James protested.

"She might be." I murmured. James scowled, shaking his head, but before he had the chance to respond, Aileen Quigley came over, twirling her long dark hair around her finger as she smiled sweetly at Jamie. I looked away, blinking away sudden moisture in my eyes as Aileen engaged Jamie in something that resembled talking to a wall: James was obviously preoccupied with our conversation.

"I'm going to my grandparents home in Argentina—I love it there, it's so warm." Aileen gushed, leaning forward a little, and I raised my eyebrows. She and Bethany were constantly trying to engage James and Louis in conversation, but they were rarely so forward with how badly they wanted to talk to the boys. "What're you doing for spring break?" Aileen asked, her glance flickering to me with a tepid smile when James didn't answer. "Sera?" She continued after a moment when I didn't immediately respond. "Got any big plans?"

"Um." I blushed in embarrassment. "Not really." I didn't even have a place to stay over spring break, or people to stay with. Aileen blushed scarlet as she realized her mistake and my lack of a response, genuine apology running over her features.

"I'm so sorry!" She said, clapping a hand to her forehead. "I—I was just trying to—"

"I know." I said tiredly, smiling a little at her: she wasn't always nice, but she was being nice now. "James is going to Africa, right Jamie?" I said with a forced grin at my best friend, and Aileen looked immensely grateful at how I was involving James in the conversation. James shot me his regular stony gaze. "Where in Africa?" I knew the answer to this, but I had to shove him into talking to Aileen, who was trying hard.

"Kenya." James acknowledged quietly: while he might have simply ignored Aileen's questions, he would always answer mine. I knew that. A genuine spark of interest lit on Aileen's face, but Louis approached, swinging his arm around my shoulders with a polite-but-please-leave smile at Aileen.

"Hey, I was just going to head down to the kitchens for some food before this stupid seminar." Louis said easily, looking at Jamie and me. "Wanna come with?"

"Yeah." James said quietly, turning away from Aileen a little rudely, and I smiled a little at Aileen.

"See you later." I said, before turning away with Louis, who dropped his arm from around my shoulders as we ducked out the portrait hole. James was waiting right outside, and he didn't even wait for the portrait of the fat lady to close before he snorted.

"Daisy is not right." He protested.

"She's not wrong either." I said seriously.

"Your dad didn't abandon you, he's not a drunk, and there are plenty of acceptable not-so-scary reasons that you don't know your mum's name." James rattled off as the portrait closed: Louis looked from James to me to James and back to me in confusion. He hadn't been there when we'd started this debate.

"Okay, yeah, Dad's neither a jackass who abandoned his kids nor a drunk, but I don't know my mom's name." I said evenly.

"What did Daisy say?" Louis demanded, confused.

"Nothing." James and I shot out at the same time, and Louis rolled his eyes, but we all fell silent. James and I held one another's gaze for a moment longer before I looked away, glancing at Louis.

"You were hungry, right?" I asked quietly. Louis nodded, frowning a little as he looked at me, and I just crossed my arms and passed both of the boys, walking towards the kitchens in silence.

An hour later, we were standing in the Great Hall with the rest of the first-through-fourth years, and we were watching Longbottom warily as he crossed to the middle of the dais where the teachers usually ate at the front of the hall. "Alright, kids, welcome to the first practical self-defense seminar," Longbottom began, and I yawned tiredly, leaning my head on Jamie's shoulder: he slipped his arm around my shoulders. "We're going to split into different groups due to the obvious age—" Longbottom fell silent as I saw a hand shoot up across the room. "Um, okay, Miss Saab, what's your question?" I swallowed: Divya was the one raising her hand. I hadn't been able to tell from where I'd been sitting before this.

"Why are we having this seminar when there's never been anything like this before at Hogwarts?" Divya asked, her voice perfectly innocent, and my stomach twisted in guilt as my gaze flicked to Longbottom. Stupid Slytherin kids were trying to make the same point that Daisy had made in the Common Room an hour ago. "I mean we didn't even have this during the Wizarding Wars,"

"Well, Miss Saab, there have been some dangerous attacks recently and we wish all of our students to be safe." Longbottom said pleasantly.

"But haven't those attacks been...targeted?" This time it was a Hufflepuff third year whose name I didn't know, and he didn't sound like he meant to make Wes and me awkward. The kid was just curious. All the same, though, I felt a wave of resentment towards him: he had to be thirteen or fourteen. By that age, you had enough tact not to bring up stuff like that.

"Well, yes—"

"I mean, the only people who got attacked have been Sera and Wes." Rory's brother said, and I crossed my arms across my chest, as Rory, who was standing in front of me, glanced back at me apologetically. "But there have been other people with them when they get attacked." I relaxed: Conan was defending us. "Besides, it's practical to learn this stuff, guys." Conan sort of annoyed, and I smiled shyly at Rory, who flashed a grin back at me.

"Exactly, Mr. Corner," Professor Longbottom said easily. "Now, we're splitting into age groups because you're obviously at different levels: first years, please stay put; second years, please follow Professor Lovegood; third years, follow Professor Gilbert; and fourth years, please follow the Headmistress." There were a few minutes while everyone got up and left, leaving the first years. "Alright," Professor Longbottom said with a smile to all of us. "You all can sit down now that there's some room..." We sat automatically, clumping together. "Alright, guys, as we've already established, this is a self-defense seminar, mostly to supplement Defense Against the Dark Arts, which doesn't really get practical until third year." He paused. "I'm just going to ask a few questions to see where you all are: how many of you know a defensive spell? A counter-curse, a shield spell, whichever..." About fifteen of the forty first years in the hall raised their hands, and Longbottom nodded. "How many of you think you could perform one?" He asked, and a few more hands dropped.

"Only nine?" Louis murmured beside me, frowning. "That doesn't seem right." Louis, Jamie, Rory and I all had our hands raised, as did Brian Gallagher, Greg Landau, Madeleine Holbrook (a Ravenclaw), Divya and Pamela Lance (a Ravenclaw). No Hufflepuffs raised their hands, and I raised my eyebrows, exchanging looks with James: the Hufflepuff kids weren't necessarily the brightest, but for not one of them to be able to perform a shield spell, it was kind of pathetic.

"Alright." Longbottom said easily, nodding once. "And how many of you know curses?" Several Slytherin hands shot up, as did more Gryffindor and Ravenclaw ones. Two Hufflepuff boys raised their hands, grinned recklessly, and I would have bet a million galleons their curses were better for pranks than actual fighting. "How many can perform it?" Longbottom continued after a moment. A couple of Slytherin hands reluctantly dropped, and one Hufflepuff boy's hand dropped; several Ravenclaws lowered their hands as well. Even Rory lowered his hand, and I frowned at him—hadn't he hurled a curse when those guys in the forest attacked us? But he just shook his head once, looking forward again.

So all that was left was Brian, Greg, Hufflepuff boy whose name I didn't know, Louis, James and me.

"Alright...I'd like a demonstration of first a shield spell, then a curse: who raised their hands for both?" Longbottom questioned: Brian, Greg, Louis, Jamie and me. "Alright." He said after a moment. "Miss Finnigan, Mr. Landau, please come up here." I pushed myself to my feet, grateful that this had been deemed casual attire, so I was in jeans and a zip-up hoodie: doing this in my robes would have been such a pain. Greg crossed to the front of the room as well, and we stood facing each other. "Now, Mr. Landau, I would like you to try to cast the Jelly-Legs jinx on Miss Finnigan—and Miss Finnigan I'd like you to repel it, either with a counter-curse or a shield spell." I positioned myself awkwardly across from Greg, taking a deep breath as he said the incantation, and the spell came out, light pink in color.

"Protego," I said easily, barely moving my wand, and my red shield spell jumped from my wand to overwhelm the jinx midair, exploding in a mass of sparks.

"Good job!" Professor Longbottom said approvingly. "Keep going—though no harmful curses, understood? Charms and jinxes will work well enough for the point of the lesson. And you both may defend or attack, now." He asked, and Greg and I nodded.

"Rictusempra," Greg said uncertainly, and I swiped my wand once wordlessly, grinning a little as the Gryffindor kids cheered as my shield spell came and blocked his charm. "Serpensortia." He said after a moment, and a snake emerged from his wand: my eyebrows flew up as my mind raced. I knew a spell for this, I knew I did.

"Pepulsi," I said after a moment, and the snake vanished. Greg muttered the Trip Jinx and I slashed out a shield spell, and then Greg more determinedly shot out:

"Tarantallegra." He muttered, and I backed up a step as I shield-spelled it.

"Expelliarmus." I said easily to Greg, my eyes zeroing in on his wand: I was competitive, sometimes, and being pitted against Greg was bringing that out. I had to win, now.

"Protego. Rictusempra!"

"Protego, Expelliarmus!" Greg's wand flew from his hands, and I levitated it into mine, grinning as Rory and Edie whooped and the Slytherin kids all glared at me.

"Very good, guys, both of you." Longbottom said sincerely, and Greg came forward, looking kind of mad, but I just handed his wand back to him. "Mr. Landau that was very good use of the Snake-Summoning spell, and Miss Finnigan, your banishment charm was flawless. Ten points to Gryffindor." I handed Greg's wand back to him. "Alright, who else would like to take a try?" He waved Greg and I down the steps. "Please shake hands to officiate the end of the duel but then take your seats."

Greg and I shook hands, and he pulled me an inch closer while he was still holding my hand. "Bet you cheated, mudblood." He muttered, and I shoved away from him, my grin dropping as I glared at him, my eyes flashing as we pulled away from each other. We turned to descend the steps, and I purposely stepped closer to Greg as we jogged down.

"Better a mudblood than Brian's lackey." I pulled away from Greg before he could retort, smirking as I felt his dark scowl on my back, and I picked my way carefully through the kids, getting a few high fives along the way, from Edie, Aileen, and Neil. I moved to where James and Louis were sitting, right behind Rory: I dropped down beside Rory. James tapped my shoulder, and I glanced back at him.

"What'd Greg say to you?" He demanded in a whisper, frowning, as Professor Longbottom called up a Hufflepuff boy and Divya.

"Said I probably cheated and I was a mudblood," I said quietly, cocking an eyebrow. "I told him better than Brian's lackey, and you're still not allowed to kill him." I finished jokingly, Louis smiled weakly, but James's expression just continued to darken. I watched his eyes flash for a moment before I shook my head. "Your face will get stuck that way you know." I told James, and he just took a deep breath through his nose.

"This should bother you more." James muttered, and I just shrugged. It probably would have bothered me more had I not been so pleased with my dueling abilities. "Seriously."

"Eh, not really." I said. "Greg doesn't matter, in the grand scheme of things."

"That's very mature of you." Louis said approvingly.

"And he doesn't matter more," I continued, grinning at Rory. "Because I beat him. So I win, and he loses. Sucks for him, go me!" Rory laughed beside me, earning himself a silencing look from Longbottom, and even James chuckled once.

"Slightly less mature." Louis noted, sounding bemused. I just grinned unrepentantly back at him, before turning back around to watch my year-mates duel. I'd won.

---

The next morning I woke up outrageously early, and for once in my life, I swung my legs out of my bed almost a moment after I woke up, pulling on the Chudley Cannons sweatshirt I'd yet to give back to Louis before I grabbed the already-wrapped present. I jogged down the steps, then turned in the common room to jog back up the steps of the boys' dorms, this time more quietly. I was more scared of the older boys than I was of the older girls, all of whom seemed sort of sympathetic towards me. The older boys just kind of regarded me as Wes's little sister.

I opened the first-year boys' dorms door silently, creeping inside, and James, sitting in the windowsill, turned to look at me. I blinked, then frowned. "You were supposed to be asleep, birthday boy." I muttered unhappily, and James raised his eyebrows, his eyes flicking down to the present in my hands then back up to my face. I blushed suddenly. "I know you didn't want a present, but I figured that maybe if I just left it like on your bedside table and you always wake up late which would mean you could open it and it wouldn't be stressful or anything like that," I was babbling now, in a whisper, but that didn't make it better: I couldn't stop. "I didn't want to antagonize you or anything--just, you know, celebrate your birthday, because I went to a lot of trouble to get Louis a good present and I didn't want you to feel unloved, you know? Because you're my best friend and I couldn't do that because I do love you. Besides, I want a birthday present from both of you." James raised his eyebrows as I finished my whisper-speech. He blinked a couple of times before he grinned a little, looking genuinely delighted. Then he seemed to have enough sense to smother the smile, and he rose from his spot at the windowsill to grab my hand, leading me out of the room and back down to the common room. He waited until we'd sank down on the floor in front of the fire to speak.

"You're insane." James murmured to me.

"Yeah, well, you make me nervous, dork." I shot back. "And this present's from mainly me. But I thought of it, and Louis really just helped me ask your mom for help because I couldn't make this happen on my own." I shoved the present at him, and he caught it, his gaze flicking down at it for barely a moment before he looked up at me.

"Why do I make you nervous?" He asked me softly, and I tucked a few stray hairs behind my ear.

"Because you're my best friend and today's your birthday." I murmured to him, my voice just as soft. "And you're... I dunno." I blushed. "Jamie, you've been super great through all this crap with my parents. I owe you a good birthday."

'You don't owe me." He protested, but he was grinning. "You're such a sap."

"You're sappier." I accused. "I'm at least talking seriously. You're taking my talking seriously." I nodded. James rolled his eyes. "Now open your stupid present, you big jerk."

"Just cuz I'm bigger than you doesn't mean I'm big." James retorted. "You're tiny."

"You're oversized. Open!" I commanded, and James chuckled but obeyed, carefully untying the bow and unwrapping the present. He opened the box, and froze, before he looked up at me with a grin.

"Is this..." James's voice was hushed. "Oh, hell--this is a freaking signed beater's bat!" James sounded reverent. "You're actually the best present giver ever, I hope you're aware of that." He murmured, sparing me a glance, and I grinned again, bouncing forward to sit beside him. He moved the box off his lap and hugged me to him tightly, and then I completely spontaneously kissed his cheek. James and I pulled back immediately. A blush rose to my face, and I blinked at James nervously. "Um, thank you," He said softly.

"You're welcome," I said shyly. I swallowed. "I'm, um, glad you like it." I groaned internally: this was so awkward. I hated how this had happened--I wasn't even sure what on the planet earth had possessed me to kiss James's cheek. What the hell was wrong with me? We were friends, just friends, that was all, and aside from that, I liked being James's friend. James was my best friend in the entire world. What the hell was I doing screwing that up?

And at five thirty in the morning?

"I really do." James said softly. We sat in silence for a moment before James looked back into the box. "Who...Oh my God, Charlie Charapko signed this. I freaking love you." James grinned back at me, the awkwardness forgotten, and I grinned back at him out right.

What would my life have been like without Jamie? For awkard or not awkward?