Once again he found himself in darkness, but this time it felt different. His thoughts were fuzzy, almost like…had he been drugged?
He fought he way through the fuzzy thoughts and pain took it place. He let out a groan and opened his eyes. He saw the familiar faces of the Master and his son.
"What?"
His thoughts were still confused.
"Eresh'ala," the Master said.
"Ni'ala…" he started to say, then he felt….no, no, no…what had they done. He pulled his hand out of the Master's and said in a voice that held horror.
"What have you done?"
The Master grabbed his hand again and his voice seemed full of regret.
"We...I didn't have a choice."
"How could you…you knew what he did."
"Do you think I wanted to?"
"Then why?"
"I didn't want to lose you to the madness…forgive me."
The Doctor didn't know if he could…another damn chip in his head.
"I don't know if….go away," he said and pulled his hand away from the Master's.
"Doctor…" the Master started to say, but he turned his head away. He heard Seska speaking.
"Father, a word."
Then they were gone from his hearing and he let his emotional wall crumble. He loved the Master, but could he forgive him?
He sighed…perhaps the Master had done it for the right reason, but that didn't mean he was going to make it easy for the Master. If he had to have this thing in his head, then he must.
"He hates me," the Master said.
"No father, he doesn't. It's just a reaction to the chip."
"How will we know the chip is working properly?"
"Unfortunately we won't, not until he has another episode, and judging by the time between this and the last one, it won't be long."
"And what if it doesn't work?"
Seska sighed, "Then we will deal with it. I won't give up on finding a way to cure him father."
The Master nodded.
"The best thing you can do is distract him. We're still a while away from Earth aren't we? Then use this time to help him."
"How, if he won't even won't even look at me?"
"There's one emotion that's greater than anything else…a mother's love."
"The twins."
"Yes…take these few days to bond, you and mother and the twins. It will be fine, you will see."
"I'll do that, the gardens are a good place."
Seska nodded, then said, "I heard he converted Ash."
That broke the Master's almost good mood; he's almost forgotten about the blond.
"What are you going to do with him?" Seska asked.
The Master smiled and then said, "Well, we do need a new playmate, since we wore the last one to death."
"Another good distraction, and what about Harkness?"
The Master couldn't miss the hatred in Seska's voice and smiled…good, he was learning.
"Don't worry about him."
It was several more day before Seska allowed the Doctor to leave the med-bay. He still wasn't sure on how he felt about what the Master and Seska had done, but he was willing to listen, and was just glad to be out of those sterile surroundings.
Plus, he was missing his babies, and they were missing him. He'd felt their presence and they were clamouring for his attention.
He acknowledged the salutes and bows as he walked with the Master…well, walked just a little behind him. He wasn't going to make it that easy for him.
As they walked, he realised they weren't heading for their quarters. He didn't like this and his distrust level went up again.
"Where are we going?"
"You'll see," the Master replied.
"I want to see my babies."
"And you will."
He grabbed the Master's arm and swung him round.
"No, now," he snarled.
The Master put a hand on his shoulder and said, "Soon, Eresh'ala."
"Don't," he snarled and stepped back. He wanted to run, find somewhere to hide; his mind was at war with his hearts.
"Si'arilla," the Master said, in that tone of voice that he loved so much. "Just come with me."
He supposed he had to. After all, there was nowhere on this ship that he could hide and not be found. Plus, if he wanted to see his babies, then he would have to co-operate. So he followed the Master, but refused to take the Master's hand; let him try harder.
They finally stopped…the arboretum. Why were they here?
As they walked, he began to recognise his surroundings; it was the valley they'd found on the planet where he'd been resurrected. The sound of the brook as it bubbled its way towards some unseen river seemed to sooth him.
The Master was saying something and touched his arm; he didn't flinch away.
"You like this place so much, I terraformed it for you."
If he thought he was going to forgive him that easily, then he could think again.
"That's nice," he said.
The Master said nothing in return, just walked further into the valley.
They eventually came to the small pool that he'd liked, but his attention wasn't on that, it was on the large marquee and the playpen that sat outside it. His hearts quickened and he hurried over…there they were, his babies. At least the Master hadn't lied about that, perhaps he could trust him.
He smiled as his colours and theirs entwined, flashes of gold, yellow and orange. On the edge he could feel the Masters presence, and instead of repelling him, he let him in, his silver mixing with his gold.
He felt the Master's arms around him, and he didn't stop him. Any feeling of distrust was washed away in the love and the colours.
"Do you forgive me, Si'arila?" the Master asked.
"I suppose," he replied.
"I only did it because I care."
"Then prove you care."
"How?"
"When we get to Earth, let me go and find my boys on my own."
He could feel the Master's hesitation, so he said.
"If I'm to trust you again, you have to let me. No soldiers, no confessors."
He could feel the Master was unhappy, but he felt his assent through the bond.
"Thank you."
He put Risha down and watched her crawl towards her brother.
He felt the Master's lips on his neck, as he ghosted a kiss. He shivered and turned his head, exposing his throat. The Master let out a soft growl and led the Doctor out of the playpen and into the marquee.
Sometime later, in a breathless voice he said to the Master.
"Seska told me you have Harkness. I want to see him."
Jack sat in the semi-darkness, once again he found himself on the wrong side of victory; he'd nearly had the Doctor.
Now he had nothing. Guilt washed over him when he thought about Ash. He could only hope that he hadn't suffered.
He heard voices and blinked when light from outside poured in. When his vision cleared, he found himself looking at the one person he didn't expect to come calling.
"Hello again," the Doctor said.
Jack knew he had to tread carefully; the Doctor was unpredictable.
"Can't say it's good to see you."
"Well, that's nice, and here I am being so polite."
"What do you want, Doctor?"
He shuffled back when the Doctor came closer and crouched down in front of him.
"I want to show you why you are never going to get me back."
Jack couldn't avoid the Doctor as he clamped his hands on his head. Images flashed into his head, and it was only moments before the Doctor took his hands away.
He grabbed Jack's face with one hand and snarled.
"I will never be yours…deal with it."
With that he was gone and Jack didn't stop the tears…he'd lost the Doctor, and this time he could do nothing.