Chapter 21: Now or Never

Bella was sitting in her room, looking at the engagement ring on her left hand. She bit her lower lip and stood up, grabbing her keys. She hurried downstairs, moving right pass Jasper. "Bells, where are you going?" He asked.

"I need time to myself," she replied.

She hurried out of the house, running towards her truck. She slipped a few times, but she was able to get her footing again. She got into her truck and drove off.

She pulled into the forest and ran down a familiar path. "EDWARD!" She shouted. She tripped over a log, falling on all fours. She winced a little before getting back up and started running again. "EDWARD!" she shouted.

Bella continued running down the path, feeling like it was a path that would never end. She continued to call for Edward when she started climbing up the mountainside, coming to their meadow. She found Edward sitting there, staring at the frozen ground. "Edward?" She called. Edward looked up, quickly standing up.

"Bella hi, wasn't expecting you here," he answered.

Bella stood there, her arms crossed over her chest. "Why did you leave?" She asked. He gave her a quizzical look.

"What?" He asked.

"You didn't stay at the party, why?" She asked.

Edward rubbed the back of his neck. "I just couldn't stay," he replied. He let out a deep breath.

"Edward, you used to talk to me, but ever since I got engaged you haven't said a single word to me," she pointed out, hurt.

He still remained quiet. "Edward what is going on with you? You're my best friend," she insisted.

"Yeah, which is what I always seem to be," he muttered.

"What does that mean?" She asked.

Edward looked over at her. "I don't want you to marry him," he replied, his voice shaking. Bella stood there in disbelief, feeling hurt by his words.

"You what?" She asked.

"I don't want you to marry him," he repeated.

Bella's hurt turned into anger. "You have a lot of nerve Edward Cullen," she said angrily.

"Bella…" he started.

"You have no right!" She exclaimed hurt.

Edward walked over and stood I front of Bella. "You can't marry him Bella!" He exclaimed. Bella was glaring at him.

"You can't tell me what I can and can't do Edward Cullen! You have no right!" She snapped.

"I do have a right!" He exclaimed.

"How?!" She snapped.

"I LOVE YOU!" He shouted at the top of his lungs.

Bella stood there now really stunned at his words. "W--What?" She asked. Edward stepped back, moving his fingers through his hair.

"I love you, Bella, I have loved you for such a long time.

Bella put her hands on the side of her head. "My God…" she whispered softly.

"I have been wanting to tell you for so long, but the time was never right with everything," he started.

Edward grabbed her hand. "Bella, I love you. I love everything about you. I love that you're clumsy, I love it when you blush, when you have that off look on your face. I love that you never cared what people thought of you. I love that you're a strong person. My God Bella I just love you," he explained. She stood there, looking at their now clasped hands. Edward was swallowing hard. "I was there Bella, that night after James attacked you, I was there," he whispered.

(Flashback)

Edward walked down the hall with a bouquet of blue carnations in his hand. "Dad…" he called. Carlisle gestured for him to be quiet. Edward winced a little, clearing his throat. "Which room is she in?" He asked.

"That one, she's asleep," Carlisle replied.

Edward nodded and walked into the room. He saw Bella fast asleep and a sad smile came across his face. He walked over and stroked her face with the back of his hand. "You look pretty in blue," he whispered. He placed the carnations in the vase by her bed and looked back at her. "I won't let anything happen to you again, Bella, I promise," he whispered. He leaned forward and kissed her forehead. "I love you," he added quietly. He stroked her face one more time before leaving the hospital room.

(End Flashback)

Edward let out a deep breath. "I was there Bella, I sat here waiting and waiting for you to love me back. I was waiting for you, I guess I will always be waiting for you," he whispered. Bella felt tears press against her eyes and Edward kissed the top of her hand. "You know how I feel now…I also hope you'll be very happy with Jacob," he whispered. Bella bit her lower lip, looking at the ground. "Jacob's a good guy and a very lucky man," he added quietly. He kissed her forehead. "I love you Isabella Swan, I will love you forever," he whispered. He rubbed her arms gently. "My heart beats for you, you are the last person I think about when I go to sleep and the first person I think about when I wake up," he added.

Bella felt tears press against her eyes as he let her go and moved down the mountain again. "Where are you going?" she asked, her voice cracking.

"I'm going to head back to school, don't worry, I won't get in the way. This is the last time you'll ever see me," he replied.

Bella swallowed hard and watched him go. Every fiber in her being screamed for her to go after him, but she just stood there like an idiot. Once he was out of her sight, she fell to her knees with her head in her hands as she started crying. She wrapped her arms around herself and started rocking back and forth, wondering why she was given such the hardest decision in the world.

--------------------------

Edward put his stuff in his car again, looking back at his family. "I'll call you when I'm there," he informed. Alice walked over and hugged him. Edward hugged her back, closing his eyes.

"I'm so sorry Edward," she whispered.

"Not your fault," he answered.

He kissed the side of her head. Jasper walked over and shook Edward's hand. "Drive safely," he insisted.

"You take care of my sister," Edward answered smiling.

Jasper nodded before Edward got into his car and drove off.