Mad Red Roses

The cool night air filled the car as Jane wound down the window, flicking off the headlights so he wouldn't draw attention to himself. The last thing he wanted right now was a cop telling him he needed to move along because he was making the neighbours suspicious. That would only earn him an eye roll from Lisbon seeing as it was her house he was watching.

When he'd left her house earlier he hadn't gone home, couldn't, not with so much on his mind. Instead he'd taken up what he'd said to Jamie and had gone to the precinct hoping the team had found some more information on the Marianne's case or any case in general, something to detract his mind from everything he was feeling.

Van Pelt was the only one in the Bull Pen and seemed pleased to see him albeit a little tired around the eyes but she quickly informed him on the developments. She was hesitant to tell him about Red John's new MO, clearly afraid that he would flip out or demand to know where the body was and maybe in the past he would have done. It was too late for that now, his time was drawing to an end and soon it would all be over so he wasn't surprised by her confusion when all he did was nod but he was too busy mulling things over to be amused by it.

After lying on the sofa for nearly two hours he finally came to a decision and that was why he now sat across the road from Teresa Lisbon's house, fingers twitching in anticipation. He was nervous, more than nervous, to actually be sitting here outside her house. Can I do this? he asked himself, am I really going to tell her about Red John's last plan? The way his heart was beating answered the questions for him. He didn't want to leave her in the dark about anything anymore. This week has been about gaining trust and he hoped that he had allowed her to see she could trust him.

Recently he had been sleeping better, compared to the four or five hours he was used to, and wondered if it was because he hadn't been around crimes scenes full of bodies and weeping relatives. His heart would argue that it was from spending these past few days with Lisbon, revealing a hidden side to her which had never seen before.

He closed his eyes and let his thoughts drift back to the café two days ago when Lisbon had shed light on her past, the sad look in her eyes as she gazed out of the window, and couldn't help but feel a jolt of admiration inside him. He understood that if she could trust him with a part of her past, then if was only fair for her to know about his. That had been the reason for the "Days of Jisbon" in the first place.

He'd eventually told her about Josephine but she had turned away from him and he felt a twist in his gut. Why had it been easier to tell Cho? What made Lisbon any different? Well, because he'd been scared of her reaction, scared she would turn away and she almost had but only because he hadn't told her sooner. If, after this, she could not face him anymore then just telling her would be enough.

Lying on the couch in the precinct he'd gone back over the past week; sitting with her on the porch, seeing sadness in her eyes, the way she'd laughed on the ice rink, how she'd whispered his name as she'd leaned in towards him… He'd focused on the last one in particular and had driven straight over.

The light was on in her living room window and Jane smiled as he pictured the exact place it was inside her house. He'd just placed a foot on the pavement when the front door opened slightly and the outside light flickered on. Strange, he thought but then he remembered Josephine was staying with Lisbon and he froze. The thought of confronting her hadn't crossed his mind and he wasn't mentally prepared for such a meeting but he didn't have time. There was no time left. It has to be now

Then Walter Mashburn stepped out onto the porch and all rational thoughts disappeared from his mind.

They were too far away for him to hear what they were saying but he could just make out Lisbon leaning to one side in the doorway, arms crossed over her chest as she gazed up at him. Once upon a time he'd liked this man with his expensive suits, speed boats and more than enough cars to crash. Sharp memories of himself encouraging Lisbon to go out with this arrogant, million dollar fool, who only cared about money and good sex, made his insides burn.

He watched Mashburn lean in to say something into Lisbon's ear and she laughed, a real laugh, one of the rare ones where she tilted her head back and closed her eyes and when she brought it back down he saw Mashburn kiss her cheek.

Something broke inside him, a gunshot of pain flooded his insides and he let out a short gasp at the force of the emotion. No blood ever seeped from the wound of a breaking heart but it took everything he had to fight back the torrent of tears threatening to leak from his eyes. Slowly, tearing his gaze away from the porch, he swung his legs back into the car and threw the flowers down beside him where they drooped sadly off the edge of the seat. Hands shaking he turned on the engine and, resisting the urge to glance back over his shoulder, he reversed and drove away.

Keep driving, don't think about her with him.

Mashburn whispering words into her hair.

Mashburn kissing her cheek.

Mashburn-

He swung into the nearest space and rested his head on the steering wheel unable to decide whether to scream with rage or get out and cause some trouble. It wouldn't be difficult in the state he was in. Instead he sat silently and waited until his breathing was back under control, heart still thrashing madly against his ribs.

Yesterday on the rink he'd realised he'd fallen in love with Lisbon; the pull on his heart whenever he saw her was all too familiar and today on the porch when he'd said goodbye to her he could have sworn she felt the same way. He should have learned by now that he, Patrick Jane, never got the things he wanted. Money he had but didn't want or need, friends he pushed away as far as he could and the thought of starting a relationship never crossed his mind...until now.

But what did it matter? He'd be gone soon. This was for the best. He wanted Lisbon to be happy, to be with someone who could look after her physically and emotionally, not to mention Mashburn was loaded. Yes, this was for the best.

But you could be better...

A slamming door outside had him slowly raising his head off the steering wheel. A young woman was walking down the steps of the house he'd parked by and even in the darkness the moonlight glinted on the tears spilling quietly down her face. Without even thinking he rolled down his passenger window.

"Sorry, er, excuse me," he waved at her when she raised her head, "I'm a little lost could you tell me where I am?"

Her eyes were blank as if she were hypnotised and for a fraction of a second Jane wondered if she was going to reply.

"2209 O Street is where I'm sat." Her voice was monotonous but he could hear the underlying shake it held. "Depending on where you want to go if you turn around and go back that way," she nodded down the road, "you'll eventually hit the freeway."

"Thanks. Beautiful night isn't it?"

"It's why I'm out here," she sighed turning her head towards the moon and Jane was glad to see she was no longer crying. "Sometimes I just sit out here and look at the stars and wish I could be one of them. Billions of light years away from this world and yet we can see them. They're beautiful."

He followed her gaze up into the sky and the sight reminded him of last night when he had watched Lisbon do exactly the same thing, marvelled at the curve of her neck at she'd looked up into the darkness. The thought made his heart ache and he struggled to keep his breathing even.

"You know, the world is a beautiful place when people smile."

"Huh, yeah right."

"Hey, it is you know! A little smile can go a long way."

A sudden thought struck him and he reached back into the car, picked up the discarded flowers beside him and held them grandiosely out of the window. "A bouquet of flowers does too."

The woman gave him a sceptical look and walked hesitantly towards him, taking the flowers from his hand. "Is this some weird way of hitting on me? Because it's not-"

"Nope. Can't a kind stranger give a sad lady a bunch of flowers to make her smile again?"

She brought the flowers close to her face and closed her eyes as she breathed them in. "Not in this day and age but thank you. Oh but wait!" Jane suddenly found the flowers being brandished back into his face as the woman whispered, "I can't take these. They belong to somebody else who deserves them more than I do."

Even if he'd wanted to he couldn't have taken them back, not after seeing the sadness disappear from her eyes and he lifted a hand to push them back toward her. "They're yours, please. Take them."

"Oh, okay. Well, whoever she is, she's missing out on a great man."

"Ah," he switched on the engine and she stepped back away from the kerb, "sometimes you don't know what you're missing out on until you've have had it taken away. Now you keep that smile on your face, okay?"

"Sure thing, but you gotta do the same!" She walked back up the steps and when she reached the top she turned and gave him one last wave before disappearing back into the house. He pulled out onto the road and began to drive knowing the last thing he was going to do was smile.

Author's Note: Quickest update ever. Probably because it's so short (I'm sorry!) but the next one will be long don't worry, more from Lisbon's POV and another Josephine I think.

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