"Are you sure you want me to stay? You do remember how early my alarm goes off for pre-rounds, right?" Clarke studies Lexa's clean face through the mirror as she pats it dry with a towel before bed.

"I do remember, yes."

"And you still want me here so I can groan and take too long to turn it off before the dawn can even think about coming?"

Lexa hums and leans into Clarke, "Sounds about right."

"Okay, well then no grumbling at me when your beauty sleep is disturbed."

Lexa drops playful kisses into her neck and wraps her arms around Clarke to keep her close, smiling at Clarke's giggles.

"I like you here, Clarke." Her eyes are twinkling and her cheeks are rosy and Clarke feels that new familiar wave of love wash over her.

"I like being here."

Clarke tugs Lexa back into bed, curling into her as they hit the sheets.

"We should tell them."

"Hmm?" Lexa's brow raises with confusion and Clarke would kiss it if she weren't too nervous about her next sentence.

"I've been thinking about what you said yesterday, and I think we should tell them. Disclose our relationship."

"You do?" Lexa sits up to look at Clarke more fully.

"I do. Telling Jaha and telling your boss won't change anything. It's not like I'm going to spread it around the hospital."

"Oh thank god," Lexa expels with a relieved sigh. Worry seeming to slice itself from her bones and Clarke has to laugh. Lexa merely shrugs at the look Clarke gives her and giggles a bit as well.

"Care to explain?"

"I wanted you to say that. I wanted… That's… I didn't want to force it."

Clarke laughs again, "Lex… I've been asking you what thing this is between us for months. You could have just told me what you wanted."

Lexa's brow furrows and she opens her mouth to speak before closing it again. Clarke reaches out and stills her hands from wringing themselves into knots. It breaks Lexa from her reverie and the look she sends Clarke is devastating.

"Are you sure?"

Clarke holds on to that glow that seems to have burrowed inside of her when she thinks about being in love with the girl next to her. "I am. I'm quite sure about you, Lex. Jaha will keep it quiet, and I'd rather be honest with him. Plus, if he hears it from my mom it'll be ten times worse."

"Your mom?"

"Yeah, they know each other." She shrugs and sinks onto her back.

Silence settles between them, but Clarke can practically hear Lexa's brain turning in her head.

"Clarke?"

"Yeah, babe?"

"Why didn't you say so yesterday?"

"I didn't want to force it either, you seemed like you needed to get all your words out." She shrugs and this time they both laugh.

"What are we going to do with each other? We can't approach every big decision like this…"

Lexa finally settles herself next to Clarke and places a tender kiss on her lips, thumb brushing along Clarke's jaw.

"We'll think of something. Maybe we could try flipping a coin next time?" Lexa grins as Clarke pokes her side in jest, trying to stifle a yawn.

"We'll tell them. Tomorrow?"

"Tomorrow."

Xx

Clarke's alarm goes off at the usual ungodly hour and Lexa mumbles something before turning over away from Clarke and curling into her pillow. She's still breathing evenly and Clarke smiles into a yawn as she swings her feet over the edge of the bed and gets ready for work.

She drops a kiss on Lexa's cheek before she leaves and feels warm at the hint of a smile she receives.

Pre-rounds are brutal and Indra is in a surly mood when she comes to collect her crew for their assignments. She barks her orders and Octavia swears under her breath as they scurry away towards the cardio wing.

When they get there, the attending is yelling orders and rushing a gurney down the hallway, looking over his shoulder for Octavia and Clarke to follow.

It's a one of a kind surgery. Even from the back of the room, with an obstructed field of vision.

Octavia gets pulled forward, gets questions rapid fire, the next coming before she can finish her last.

She looks at Clarke with wide, nervous eyes over her mask the entire time. She does something right because she's handed the clamp to position in the open body cavity.

Clarke flames with jealousy and pride all at once.

It's a one of a kind surgery and it lasts for hours.

She's running on the rush of adrenaline only when they finally scrub out. Octavia's smile is brilliant and she looks in a daze, and Clarke knows she won't live down the high maybe ever.

It's late when she finds her gear again, her phone battery low in the pocket of her lab coat.

Missed texts from Raven, her mother. Lexa.

Her heart flutters and she opens those first.

The good morning. The random check in. The I'm going to tell my boss we're together. The you must be in surgery so have a good day.

Her stomach plummets.

She walks away from Octavia and presses Lexa's name, calling her instead of texting.

"Hi," Lexa's voice is like a hug, even through the phone.

"Hi." Clarke can't hide her smile.

"How was your surgery?"

"It was amazing and I will tell you all about it soon, but… how did it go?"

"I didn't tell him."

"Why not?"

"I didn't hear from you and I want to make sure we are still on the same page. Plus, I didn't know if you wanted to come and sit with me when I do."

Clarke's heart flutters again. That familiar warmth wrapping around Clarke.

"Lexa, of course I'm still on the same page."

"Good."

Clarke smiles again, "Tomorrow?"

"Tomorrow. So, your surgery…"

Clarke laughs and starts at the beginning of her day, weaving through the drama and the adrenaline for her girl on the phone.

Xx

The bed in the on call room is lumpy and Murphy is snoring in the bunk below hers and there's a weird clicking sound coming from inside the walls and all Clarke wants is to be in Lexa's bed.

With Lexa.

She stares at the tiles on the ceiling unable to sleep even though her body is exhausted.

Bursting with the energy she feels now whenever she remembers that buzz that exists inside her body.

That buzz of love.

It's new and exciting.

And she doesn't remember ever feeling this way about anyone.

And it's a whole big feeling that she doesn't quite know what to do with, but she's hoping Lexa will help her handle the load. The wave washes off of her again and she closes her eyes to imagine that soft look Lexa always has when they climb into bed ready to sleep.

She slips off before she even realizes it.

Xx

Pre-rounds are rough. Her crew is all cranky from little sleep and hard cases this week, and Clarke almost strangles Murphy.

Her phone buzzes in her pocket and it's Lexa returning the good morning text Clarke sent before the sun. The one she hoped didn't wake her girlfriend as soon as she hit send.

Girlfriend.

She turns the word over in her brain a few times, trying to stop the grin she can feel from spreading across her face and failing completely.

She sneaks a quick grumpy face selfie and shoots it off to Lexa before rounding the corner to note the charts for the patients she was in charge of overnight. Indra will be in soon for rounds and she would like to start the day off on the right foot.

Her phone buzzes again rattles next to her notebook and she pulls it out. Lexa's sleepy smile greets her, frazzled waves spread across her pillow and a look of bliss on her face. Clarke's heart kickstarts in her chest and her stomach swoops and shit, she's gorgeous.

Wish I was there with you, beautiful.

The three ellipses pop up as soon as she hits send. The reply coming quick. Clarke bites her own lip in anticipation.

Wish you were here, too. Although, it was nice not having your alarm go off….

Yeah, yeah, I'll remember that next time you beg me to stay the night before a shift.

Please do, I'll need to weigh that disturbance against sharing a bed with a blanket thief who likes to snuggle before I make my decision.

Clarke's face flares red with her blush and she bites her lip again.

As if there is any competition, really.

She sends a wink emoji and puts the phone back in her pocket, needing to get the charts out of the way in the next few minutes before Indra storms through the floor. Her phone buzzes again in her pocket, but she ignores it until she can give Lexa her full attention.

"There you are! What the fuck are you doing all the way over here?" Octavia finds her, a stack of her own charts in her arms and a grimace on her face. She sets them on the abandoned windowsill next to Clarke and adjusts her ponytail.

"Trying to get these charts set for Indra. I'd rather not have her bitch me out again today."

Octavia rolls her eyes and swings up to sit next to her charts, opening the first one to flip through it.

"Star student can't handle being called out once a week, alert the presses."

"Oh, fuck off. I'm not the star student."

"Sure you are." She looks up and levels a glare at Clarke. "And if you say you're not, I'm going to punch you so fucking hard you'll have a bruise for weeks."

"Whatever you say, O. I wasn't the one that got to hold an artery closed yesterday so…."

At that, Octavia puffs up with pride. "Damn straight you didn't."

They settle after that, the only sound shared between them pens scratching against paper, and flipping pages. When both pagers go off, Clarke sighs and Octavia hops down. "Let's go, the sooner we get this over with the sooner we can get away from her."

Clarke scribbles a few more notes in the last chart and quickly chases after Octavia.

Xx

Indra seems in a less foul mood than she was the day before and dismisses them quickly, anxious to get to her own patients. Clarke pulls her phone from her pocket to check the time and notes three new texts from Lexa, sent only moments prior.

She smiles and feels warm all over when she reads the last one.

Meet me by the good coffee cart?

She looks up and finds Octavia deep in discussion with Monty outside of the last patient room, so she quickly makes her escape, butterflies taking over her empty belly.

When she finally climbs the last staircase into the large, open lobby, she finds Lexa standing tall and regal just off to the side of the coffee cart. A smile overtakes her before she can think anything of it and gets bigger as Lexa finally sees her. Eyes brightening up and her own smile blooming on her face. She moves closer to the stairs and waits for Clarke to descend the last few.

Clarke feels like jumping into her arms, her heart nearly leaping out of her chest.

"Hi," she gasps, breathless and ecstatic.

"Hi." Lexa's voice is quiet, her eyes scanning Clarke's face. Lingering on her lips. "Can I buy you some coffee?"

"She knows the way to my heart, yes she does," Clarke teases, runs her fingers along Lexa's wrist for a moment, feeling the pulse fluttering there and rivaling her own. "I'll even let you buy me a scone. I haven't eaten anything in ages." She steps closer to Lexa turning her and guiding her back to the short line that's formed at the cart.

Sees the way green eyes sparkle, look at her with a new depth.

Lexa stands in front of her, a shade too close for public but Clarke cannot find it in herself to care or to move. She's missed Lexa and she feels like an idiot because it's only been a day.

And yet, she craves more.

Always more.

Lexa orders and stands to the side, waiting for Clarke to order before handing over her card. Clarke closes the distance again while they wait for their lattes, her shoulder brushing against Lexa's, her thoughts running away with her. Wondering if she has time to pull Lexa into a storage closet to give her the kiss she's been thinking about all morning.

All day, really.

The soft kind of kiss that turns into something wet and dirty.

She doesn't hear Lexa's question, not until Lexa gently nudges her and repeats it with a smirk on her face as if she knew exactly what Clarke was thinking about.

"Hmm?" Eyes zero in on pouty lips.

Lexa chuckles, "I said, how do your cases look today?"

That flutter is back in her belly, alive with Lexa's interest in her work. "Too soon to tell. I have a few holdovers from yesterday to keep an eye on and at least one scheduled procedure this afternoon."

Lexa opens her mouth to ask another question when she's abruptly cut off.

"Dude, what the fuck today? You keep disappearing on me." Octavia waltzes up to the cart and orders before turning her attention back to Clarke. "Did you know what was going on with that woman Monty had to watch all night?"

Her eyes slide to Lexa for a long beat as she shoves her wallet back in her scrubs. Clarke feels Lexa step away, putting more distance between them and aching at the loss of it.

"Yeah, he told me about it last night before I went to the on-call room. I told him to page me if he needed me."

The barista calls out the name of the man who ordered before them in line, and Clarke feels her anxiety spike. Lexa will have no reason to stay once she gets her latte.

Not with Octavia here and talking to Clarke.

"Indra was surprisingly easy on him this morning…"

Clarke nods, watching the hot espresso get poured into the paper cup that bears Lexa's name.

Octavia continues to ramble next to her, but all Clarke can pay attention to is Lexa and the distance that grows between them. Lexa in tight gray slacks and an emerald button down that brings out the green of her eyes. The blazer over her shoulders form fitting and cut to perfection.

Clarke imagines throwing it to the floor of the on-call room in a heap and having her way with Lexa.

She's pulled from her thoughts again within the span of fifteen minutes by Octavia's pager going off loudly next to her, met with a groan.

"Shit. I thought I'd actually get to my coffee today. Can you bring that up to Monty, he could probably use it. I gotta run to the OR."

"Yeah, you got it. I'll find you later."

"You better."

She's gone in a flash and then it's just the two of them again. Clarke finds Lexa already looking at her with that small grin.

"What?"

"Your work friends seem intense," she teases.

"Says the girl who looks like she'd kick someone off a tower just for pissing her off on any given day."

Lexa shrugs, "Work hard, play hard."

The barista calls out her name and Clarke laughs. "Speaking of work hard, when are you due in?"

"I may or may not have gotten here a little bit earlier than usual today."

"Oh? Why's that?"

"I heard this is the best place to get coffee in the hospital and I had to beat the crowds." Her eyebrow quirks as she plays along.

Clarke exaggeratedly looks around the lobby, empty but for a few hospital employees making their way in. The sun still low in the morning sky. "Good choice, it's slammed here today."

"Totally. Plus, there's this hot doctor who lets me into her scrubs every once in awhile if I get on her good side." Lexa leans in and says it just loud enough for Clarke to hear.

Her stomach flips and her cheeks burn. She sees the barista look up with a smile.

"Trying to make me jealous, Woods?" Clarke pulls her eyes from Lexa's mouth and clears her throat.

"Hardly." Lexa's voice is still low and she winks at Clarke before stepping back and accepting Clarke's latte from the barista. "So… is today the day?"

"The day?" She tries to blink away lusty thoughts.

"You really need this coffee today." Lexa jokes and hands it over. "Remember what we talked about the other day?"

"Ah, yes. Today. I believe I can grab Jaha for a sit down."

"Alright, you'll text me when you do? There'll be a form to sign."

"Of course."

"Good. You can buy me coffee next time to celebrate." She grins again and Clarke hopes she never gets tired of the way it makes her insides nearly melt.

Octavia's doppio espresso comes up quickly, and Clarke grabs it. Lexa dutifully waits for her to turn around and pretends to look embarrassed about checking out Clarke's ass in her scrubs.

"Wanna walk me back over?"

Xx

Lexa makes the softest noise in her ear as Clarke trails her lips down the long, strong column of neck before her. Unbuttoning two buttons and sliding her tongue over collarbones, delighted at Lexa's pulse thundering just under her skin.

"Clarke…" Lexa gasps, her fingers digging into Clarke's shoulders.

"Hmm," Clarke hums, working her way back up the other side of Lexa's neck.

"I have a meeting in ten minutes." Her voice is husky and deep, sends a thrill down Clarke's spine right to the core of her.

"I can do a lot in ten minutes." She redoubles her efforts, nipping at Lexa's defined jaw, hands gripping at Lexa's ass.

Lexa groans, loud and unrestrained. Clarke lives for it.

"I know, fuck… I know you can, but I have to get all the way across the hospital."

Clarke leaves one last lingering kiss on the underside of Lexa's jaw before pulling herself away, thinking she deserves a goddamn gold medal for her restraint in this moment. Lexa's face is flushed and her pupils blown and she looks like a goddess even in the shitty lighting of the supply closet.

"You've got long legs, I have faith that you'll make it." She buttons Lexa's shirt again and straightens the blazer, running her hands along the lapels.

Lexa is still too distracted to joke, her eyes trained on Clarke's lips even though her phone chirps with the appointment alert. Clarke leans in and gives her a soft peck, closing the door on this moment.

"Go, don't be late." She shoves Lexa gently in the shoulder to put some distance between them. "I'll text you later."

Xx

Finding time to sit down with Jaha is easier than Clarke thought. Or perhaps it's a little bit of goodwill shown by the universe in this moment of time, her reward for restraint in the storage closet.

They have made it through their pleasantries and now he sits and calmly waits for her to explain her visit, fingers steepled in front of him on the desk.

Her phone buzzes in her pocket and she knows it's Lexa wishing her luck.

"Sir, there's something I'd like to disclose to you, and before I do I want to know that you will not tell my mother."

His brow furrows and he sits back in his chair. "Is something wrong, Clarke?"

"No," she shakes her head, her voice wobbly and tight. She clears her throat and thinks about this morning. "No, in fact, it's just the opposite." She feels the smile threaten and takes a breath to pull her professional mask back down. "It's simply something I would like to discuss with my mother in due time."

"Clarke, does this have something to do with your work here at the hospital? I hope you're not switching specialties on me."

"No, no. I, um," she blushes and forces herself to continue. "I met someone actually. Someone who works here in the hospital and I need to formally disclose the relationship."

"Ah, I see." His face falls and she can't help but feel disappointment claw at her. "Well, I suppose that is good news, Clarke."

"Why do I sense a but coming?" Her professionalism drops away again and suddenly it's not her boss before her, but one of her mother's oldest friends. He looks away and out the large window behind her for a moment, gathering his thoughts. Her stomach knots itself into a ball.

"When you told your mother and I that you were going to pursue medicine, I was thrilled. I know your mother had always hoped that you would follow in her footsteps and I know after your father died things looked bleak. You've worked so hard for this, Clarke. You worked so hard to get through that and to get to this point. I would hate to see anything get in the way of your success now. You could be great."

Feelings lodge themselves in the back of her throat with his words. The memory of her father being pulled out and used in a way to make her feel… what is he trying to make her feel?

"With all due respect, Sir, I understand your thoughts, but I am coming to you as an employee, not a family friend." Her hackles rise and she struggles to tamp down the anger. "I am telling you this information because it is required by the law and by the hospital. I am not telling you for your opinion or your judgment. If you have any doubts about my ability to focus, then you can bring them to me but only after it becomes an issue."

He seems taken aback by her answer, but she notices the way he switches back into chief mode.

"Very well." He stands and opens a drawer, sifting through folders until he draws out a single page. His pen moves swiftly as he signs it before handing it over. "You both need to sign this and file it with HR. Both departments will be notified of it's completion."

"Yes, we are working on that." She takes the form and notices it's simplicity. Almost laughs at the two short paragraphs and the remaining empty lines that sit at the bottom waiting to be signed by her, Lexa and Lexa's boss. A small box rests in the corner to be validated by HR. "Thank you."

She almost makes it to the door before he calls her back.

"Clarke, are you happy?"

She smiles, unable to contain it. "Very."