Chapter 21

"Caressa?" John called a few days later, stepping into the house. He'd made a key after thinking she was having a psychotic breakdown. "Caressa, honey?" He hadn't seen her at work, nothing. He'd tried running the shop by himself and while he could make sales, balancing the books nightly was beyond his talents. When the third day had passed and she hadn't shown up, he was officially worried.

Caressa was lying in bed up in her room, the door locked, refusing to come out, refusing to live. Her entire bedroom was blanketed in darkness, having blocked the sunlight from entering through her balcony door, not wanting to see it. She wanted to die so she could be with Mark and actually thought about committing suicide. There was currently a knife in her hand, the amulet in front of her, and heartbroken tears were sliding down her cheeks as she held the blade to her wrist. She didn't hear her brother's voice, all her mind could focus on was Mark, and hoped death was the answer she was seeking.

"Don't do it." His voice murmured in her ear though when she looked, he wasn't there. "Stay alive, I'll wait for you, live." It was a caress, surrounding her.

John was at her door now, twisting the handle, having called her name several times. "Caressa, if you don't open this door right now I'm breaking it down!" He shouted, worry clearly in his voice. When he didn't get that answer, he kicked it open.

"NO!" Caressa screamed out when she was tackled, the knife flying out of her hand and landing on the floor below, looking up to see her brother's baby blues staring back at her. "John?" She whispered in disbelief, wondering what he was doing here and how he got in her house. It didn't matter. "I don't want to live without him." She sobbed into his chest, gripping his shirt in her fists, trembling from head to toe. She didn't care if she sounded completely insane, she was in love with a damn ghost!

John stared incredulously at the knife, his grip on her tightening just incase she tried making a grab for it. "You never really had him, Care." He said softly. "You have to move on, sweetie. You still have a life to live, suicide isn't the answer." He heard her cries and felt his heart break for her. "Come on honey, Mark wouldn't want you to kill yourself, we both know this." He stood up, scooping her up against his chest. She needed to get out of this house and he wasn't going to take no for an answer.

"Where are we going?" Caressa asked an hour later, wearing black jeans with a black long sleeved shirt, refusing to wear color right now. Black shades were over her swollen red eyes and her hair was flat, hanging down her back, no style to it. She just didn't have the desire to dress up wherever her brother was taking her.

"We're just driving." John said, gripping the wheel, glancing at her.

He had considered taking her home with him, but didn't want to explain to Lizzie why his sister was pining after a guy who just happened to be dead. Then the thought of Newbury crossed his mind, but there were a few things wrong with that. First and foremost, Caressa would probably kill HIM if he even suggested it and second, their parents just didn't need to know their baby girl had gone off the deep end.

Throughout the drive, Caressa didn't once say a word, her thoughts solely on Mark as the silent tears fell down her cheeks. She knew John had been running the shop and would thank him for it later. Right now, all she wanted to do was be with Mark, in his arms, in his presence. She remembered their night they first made love out in the open country on the picnic table. Then in her bedroom, which used to be his. The house and the shop were both reminders of the man who was dead and couldn't give her what she needed. Caressa loved someone she could never have and it killed her on the inside.

John reached across the seat to take her hand, squeezing gently. "Caressa, you need to get away from the house for awhile. Why don't you stay in town with me and Lizzie for a few days?" He asked softly, fully prepared to battle her on this when she said no, knowing it was coming. "It's not healthy for you to stay there all day crying. I know you...you love him, but...it's time to let him go."

"No!" She shouted, forcing him to stop the truck as she got out, crying out when he stopped her. "NO! I will never let him go! I will never love again!" She started wailing on him with her tiny fists, the tears streaming down her face, before finally wrapping her arms around his neck, sobbing violently in it. Caressa knew what she had to do, she just needed that last burst of energy and pain to consume her. "I-I'm sorry, John..." She sobbed, her voice a heartbroken whisper, refusing to release him.

"Sssshhhh...Calm down, Caressa." John whispered, his blue eyes wide, body trembling at her outburst. He pulled her over the seat and into his lap, wrapping his arms around her tightly. "Calm down, sweetie, calm down." He soothed, knowing that had not been the thing to say, mentally making a note to avoid mentioning Mark and letting go ever again.

Caressa cried until she could no longer get up the strength, sagging against her brother, though she wasn't sleeping. "I'm leaving Houston." She announced sadly, causing John's eyes to widen even more, sniffling as she wiped more tears away. "Next week, I'm leaving Houston and going back home." She hated saying that, but she knew she had to get far away from Texas and away from this place, knowing it was the only way to mend her broken heart. "Please don't say I told you so." She whispered, wrapping her arms around herself, silent tears falling down her tear streaked face.

"I won't." He whispered, having never intended too, but secretly relieved she was going back to Newbury. Maybe she could regain some sort of life there. "You want me to come with you?" John asked in a soft voice, feeling her hot tears beating down on him, his heart breaking all the more. "Lizzie's been dying to meet mom and dad." He said, attempting to inject some humor into his voice.

"You're going to anyway." She pointed out, sighing heavily when John just nodded, rolling her eyes. "Typical big brother." She looked up into his blue eyes and kissed his cheek before hugging him again. "Thank you for sticking by my side through all of this, John." She murmured softly in his ear, meaning what she said, and knew deep down Houston, Texas wasn't the place she was meant to be.

"That's what big brother's are for." He said gruffly, rubbing his ear down against his shoulder. "You know I hate that." He groaned with a slight smile, glancing at her to see if he had evoked a smile from her. Not surprisingly, he hadn't. "Just say when you want to leave, Caressa, and we'll go." He promised softly.

"One week from Friday." She murmured quietly and slowly extracted herself from his arms, crawling over to sit in the passenger seat, wiping her tears away. "In the meantime, I want to spend as much time as I can in that house before I say goodbye to it. So please take me back there." She requested softly and looked out the window. There were a few things she had to do before she left Houston and closed her eyes against the pain that radiated in her heart.

That wasn't exactly what he had been hoping to hear and shot her a pleading look. "Caressa, I really think you need to get away from that house." He said, trying to be calm, sighing heavily when she gave him one of her darker looks, gripping the steering wheel tightly, staring straight ahead. There was nothing he could say that would change her mind once she had made it up. "One week from Friday?" He asked evenly.

"Yes." She whispered as he started the truck up and turned around, heading toward the house.

Caressa knew she had to do this. There was no other choice otherwise she wouldn't be able to move on and she would end up killing herself to be with Mark on the other side, wherever he was. It broke her heart, but Caressa wanted to live. She wasn't ready to die yet, no matter how much she tried convincing herself. Her heart still beat in her chest and air was in her lungs. She could move on from this, she just needed time to heal.

Nodding, John started the truck back up, doing a U-turn in the road and headed back towards the house, knowing this was going to be one long hour drive. His mind was racing as the miles rolled by. Would Caressa try to kill herself or would she honestly go back to Newbury? The memory of seeing her holding that knife to her wrist brought tears to his eyes, hoping he wasn't making a mistake by not forcing her to stay with him.

It was the night before she was leaving Texas as Caressa stood outside of the cemetery gates, swallowing hard, and knew she had to do this. She had a shovel in one hand, her purse over her shoulder, tears cascading down her cheeks. She decided to wear something special for this occasion, sporting a black dress that went down to her knees and it was spaghetti strapped, flowing lightly in the warm summer breeze with black flats on. She hated heels, never was a fan of them and her hair was piled on top of her head in curls, a few tendrils framing her face delicately.

Caressa made her way through the cemetery, making sure not to trip over the sunken tombstones before finally arriving at her destination. Tears splashed on the ground as Caressa ran her fingertips over the words of his tombstone and knew this is where the right place to bury both the amulet and the diamonds was. Slowly, she began her job and began shoveling dirt, digging up his casket.

He watched as she dug the earth up, snorting when she reached the casket. The empty casket no less. Steve had heard the whispered rumors that Caressa was leaving, her dimwitted brother handling the closing of the shop. He'd gone to her house, watched her as she left and followed. He noticed she seemed almost well, almost air headed, as if she didn't notice what was going on around her. Ice blue eyes narrowed when he seen her set the purse aside.

"You know...I never thought in a million years I would ever be doing something like this." Caressa said as she kept digging up the casket, the full lit moon shining down on her, tears streaming down her face nonstop. "I mean granted I've always believed in the afterlife coming back and haunting the earth, but never in my life did I think this could happen..." She sniffled, piercing the ground with the shovel and pressed her forehead against the handle. "But it did and I can't stop my heart from what it feels. I can't stop loving you, Mark, no matter what. So I'm leaving Houston." Caressa sighed as she resumed digging around the casket, taking her time. "I know you'll always be with me and you probably know all of this already, but I couldn't leave without saying a proper goodbye and giving you what you deserve most, what you died for. Just know that I will always love you and when I finally pass on and go to the other side, we can ride off in the sunset and be together forever." She kneeled into the ground, pressing her hand to the stone, and let more tears fall before opening the casket, not surprised to find it empty. Mark had told her Steve disposed of his body elsewhere.

And now she was talking to the dead, more specifically a dead person she had never met. Steve shook his head, snorting softly, no wonder the woman was moving, she'd done officially lost her mind. No doubt her brother was forcing her to go back East and seek some therapy or something. What he had died for? Steve wound his way quietly towards her until he was standing behind her.

"What're you doin' here, Caressa?" He demanded softly, blue eyes narrowing when she opened the empty casket.

A scream emanated through the empty cemetery as Caressa spun around, her purse clutched to her chest, amber eyes widened as she tripped over the casket. She quickly scrambled up until they were standing on either side of the casket, swallowing hard. She had made sure nobody followed her, hadn't she? "I could ask you the same thing, Austin." She shot back, breathing heavily, her heart thundering against her chest rapidly. What was he doing here? Had he followed her? Caressa narrowed her eyes at the mere thought and wanted to rip his throat out with her long black painted fingernails.

"I'm usually here." Steve said quietly, his blue eyes still on the open casket, finally, slowly traveling upwards to meet her amber eyes. "He was my best friend. Mind tellin' me why ya dug this up?" He lightly tapped the casket with his toe, not looking away from her. "Puttin' something in it, hmm? Somethin' he died for? Is that what you said?"

"I'm burying him with his family's amulet." She quietly replied, pulling it out of her purse, and showed him the purple stone that no longer pulsated with life. "He asked me to do it." She knew she sounded crazy and honestly didn't care. "I found the amulet when I first moved in and he told me in a dream to bury him with it and to get out of his house." He probably wouldn't buy the lie, but Caressa honestly didn't care. If he was getting the diamonds, he would have to kill her for them and bury her in the empty casket.