The beginning of the end. I hope you are ready for the last chapter! Cause here it is!
Sorry if the whole thing is bolded and underlined!!! NOT MY FAULT. So no more hateful comments about it. I don't know how to fix it, its not like that on my word document.
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Blair, surprisingly, was asked very few questions about Chuck. Maybe some looks here and there. But she guessed people were no longer interested in what was going on with them…or maybe too scared to ask anything.
Chuck was asked nothing, too. But that was because he was sure the other guys were afraid to be put in the hospital like the freak that tried to mess with him before.
School was stressful. They were taking final exams because of the fact there were only two days left of school. The last tests of high school. Chuck, of course, didn't study. He never studied. But since he had been doing most of his work lately he knew a lot of the answers. That was rare for him. Blair, of course, did study. She had been studying that whole two week period where her and Chuck were not seeing each other. She had nothing better to do.
Blair tried as hard as she could to finish the test first in her class, but was beat by Nelly Yuki by only minutes. It killed her to see her turn her paper in first, knowing that she was also getting Yale.
She had told Chuck it didn't matter. It didn't matter as much as him, but still. It did matter to her. It had been her dream since…she couldn't even remember the time when she had first started wanting to go to Yale. It was just a given for her to go there.
But she thought, once upon a time, that it was a given to marry Nate. Things change, she realized. Hopes and dreams change. Chuck was her dream now. Not the prince, but rather Romeo. And she, Juliet. Not some lowly Cinderella. She was probably never satisfied in their sex life anyways, she joked in her head, remembering a few nights prior. When she had been more than satisfied. Chuck was a god in bed, another joke left unspoken. People could never understand what was so great about having sex with him unless they had experienced themselves. Although, she was hoping no one but her would get to experience for a very long while.
Blair looked around the room at the people still taking their tests. She could swear some were sweating. She cockily slid out of the desk and handed her paper to the teacher. She walked back, swinging her hips, snootily.
Chuck breezed through his test. Was confident about all his answers. No problem at all. He was one of the first people done. A miracle.
The bell rang about fifty minutes later, but the teacher stopped him before he could walk out of the room, "Wait, Chuck, I would like to speak to you."
He went on to say how proud he was of Chuck for doing so well in school lately. But then he told him what he scored on the test he had just taken. The teacher was unfortunately a fast grader.
Blair was waiting outside the gates of school for him. She tapped her foot, why was he taking so long?
A guy approached her…creepily. "Hey, Blair. What are you doing?"
"Do I know you?" She asked in a snobby way.
"I talked to you…once before. I asked you if you wanted to go on a date sometime." He hung his head, sheepishly.
The memory hit her. And she had said no, she was taken, even though it wasn't true. "Oh yes, I remember. I'm just waiting for Chuck."
"Oh yeah. You guys are going out again?"
"Yeah…but this is like our first official time." She didn't know why she was talking to this stranger. She guessed she felt like she was doing him some sort of favor.
"Oh I see. Well congratulations…I guess." Then he said somewhat ender his breath, "Even though I don't know what you see in him."
"Well people don't know him like I do. Tell me one thing that you know about him…other than what you've just heard."
"He's a total jerk. I know from experience. He laughed at me when I said I was going to ask you out."
"That's not being a jerk. That's just you being a pansy ass." She got into the guys face; he was not much taller than her.
"I really doubt you know his as well as you think you do." He challenged her.
And she stared him down, her eyes squinted and arms crossed.
Another guy approached them, this one much taller with more muscle. "Is there a problem here?" He asked Blair and the small guy shook his head. Very frightened of the new stranger, who could be twice his size. He slowly backed away then darted, not wanting to have any sort of physical encounter.
"Was that guy being a total jackass?" He smiled a brilliant white, heartfelt smile.
She was stunned by it for a moment, and then stuttered on, "Uh, uh yeah he was just calling my boyfriend a jerk. And he doesn't know him." she crossed her arms and pouted a bit.
"I guess he doesn't have a right to call him anything if he doesn't know him."
"Nobody knows him. They just think they do." She spoke to him, but did not face him. He was rather tall, and he made her feel very small. Chuck made her feel dainty, but not like a midget.
"Well, I'm sure you know him." He said, nicely. This guy was too nice. He was creepy nice compared to Chuck. Chuck could be sweet, but he would never be nice to random people.
"Yes, of course I do!" She replied a little too harshly. Realizing that what the first guy said had gotten to her in a small way.
"Whoa, whoa. Okay, calm down, girl."
"Girl?! Who are you anyways?" She was now getting pissed off at him.
"The names Matt." He held out his hand.
"I'm B-" she took his hand.
"Blair…Waldorf. Yes, I know. I also know who your boyfriend is too. And your best friend. And your ex-boyfriend. It's kind of hard to miss anything that's going on with you. Apparently you're very interesting to people."
Chuck finally left the classroom and walked outside; he was reaching the gates and saw Blair shaking hands with some strange tall dude.
"It's just cause they're jealous." She giggled, still holding his hand.
"I can see why." He looked her up and down. Taking in her whole body. His eyes lingered on her boobs and then stared deeply into her eyes again.
Chuck was anything, but happy about this. He quickened his pace and got to them. "Hello, can I help you with something?" He sneered at the guy, who was much taller, but he was in no way scared.
"I was just talking to Blair." he turned around to look at Chuck.
"You were doing more than talking to my girlfriend, now beat it. Take a hike. Whatever." He shooed him away.
"Is there a problem?" The guy was acting like he couldn't understand why Chuck was a little mad about this.
"There will be if you don't leave."
"Fine." He admitted defeat, "Bye, Blair. Nice to meet you." He smiled his dazzling smile and she couldn't help but smile a little back. Then he left, walking down the empty street. No one was left at school except Chuck and Blair now.
"Next time could you please just wait in the limo?" He motioned to it, parked next to the curb.
"That was so unnecessary! No need to be rude like that. He was nice."
"He was checking you out! Plus he was practically caressing your hand. And you were flirting!"
"No I wasn't! He was just introducing himself!" She couldn't believe Chuck's behavior. "Just because you're insecure doesn't mean you need to be so protective of what you think is your property." By property she meant her.
She realized she never should've said that. It was too harsh and insensitive to say to him right now. Why didn't she just bite her tongue? She mentally hit herself.
"Fine." He walked towards the limo, backwards so he was still seeing her. Ticked off by her comment. "You can walk home, Bitch."
"Are you kidding me?" She asked in disbelief.
"Does it look like it?" He opened the door, stepped in, and closed it behind him.
The limo took off not turning back.
Now she was completely pissed off. She crossed her arms and waited for the limo to turn back and come get her. But she watched it drive away, out of sight.
Her heals clicked against the concrete as she began her walk home.
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Everyone sat around the table eating dinner, forks clinking against plates, glasses lifted to lips. Many unimportant conversations were had.
"So how did you guys do on your final exams today?" Eric asked, caring like he usually did.
Serena answered, "Pretty good I think. I feel confident about it."
"Cool. And you, Chuck?"
He had been avoiding eye contact until now when he looked at Eric then Serena and Lily. His eyes went back to his late in shame, "I failed it." They were all silent; they were at a loss of words. "The one fucking test I didn't pay someone else to take for me and I failed it!" He threw his fork down on the plate, scooted his chair back, and left the table. He slammed the door of his room and the rest of them felt like the whole place shook.
"I'll talk to the headmistress about that." Lily said, then she began eating again.
The next day was final exams again. Chuck and Blair didn't speak; they didn't even see each other. They were still both mad at one another.
Blair tried not to think of Chuck at all while she was taking her test, but she couldn't help but say to herself, 'How the hell could he be such an asshole?' It was distracting her the whole time.
She was replaying it in her head, 'You can walk home, Bitch.'
But she did bring it one herself. She was a bitch for telling him he was insecure. She deserved it.
But then she would remind herself that he made her walk home! 'How could he do that if he was a decent human being?'
It was a cycle that she went trough the whole day. Chuck did pretty much the same thing.
The day passed quickly and before he knew it, it was the day of graduation.
Chuck sat on his bed, wearing his graduation gown, holding Blair's pin.
"What the hell is that on your sweater?" Chuck asked Nate in disgusted tone. They were only 12 and were just beginning to go through puberty so their voices were just now changing.
"It's a pin. Blair sewed it on there." They sat down at their usual lunch table and waited for the girls to arrive.
"Is it in the shape of a heart?"
"Yes."
"Gay." He said just as Serena and Blair approached behind him.
"What's gay?" Serena asked curiously and sat next to Chuck while Blair sat next to Nate.
"The pin on Nate's sweater."
Blair glared at him then threw her apple at his head. He dodged it barely. "Jesus, Blair! Chill!" He yelled.
"You're just jealous." She said, then hung onto Nate's arm, being clinging like she was most of the time."
"You think everyone is jealous of you."
Nate and Serena rolled their eyes. "Do you guys ever stop?! Seriously! You guys sound like the couple, not me and her." Nate gestured to his girlfriend.
Blair scoffed in disgust, Chuck was also pissed by the comment. "Screw you, man. Maybe you should act like her boyfriend more often and stop flirting with Serena." He said and walked away from the table.
She looked at Nate then Serena, then stood up furiously and followed Chuck.
They walked around their elementary school awhile silently. Until Blair said, "Thanks."
"For what?" He asked her very confused.
"You finally snapped me out of it. I've been thinking that the way…Nate and Serena act around each other was just me, just my imagination."
"No. It isn't. I'm sorry." He told her sincerely. Truly feeling bad that Nate neglected to treat her well.
"It's not your fault."
"I know."
"You know…" She thought about it, and then continued, "I'm starting to think you might make a better boyfriend than Nate. Maybe I should just take that pin back and give it to you."
"Oh my god. Please don't say something that horrifying ever again."
She giggled, "Sorry."
"Plus I would never wear it in a million years. It's like the tag on a dog caller. You might as well put Owner: Blair Waldorf. Do not touch. Or I will kick your ass."
"It's not like that." She hit his arm, "I told him he'll always have my heart on his sleeve. I'm not saying he belongs to me, I'm saying I belong to him."
"Total Bullshit."
Then she pushed him into a wall.
He lifted up the sleeve of his gown and pinned it on the inside. He was going to apologize to her. Their fight was ridiculous. He didn't have the right to treat her like that just for talking to another guy. He wanted to be the best damn boyfriend she ever had.
He left his room and him and Serena headed to school. To graduate. To start the rest of their lives.
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Chuck found his seat, which were in alphabetical order. He stood at the beginning of the row of chairs that his was down. Realizing that Archibald was the last A and Bass was the first B and he would have to sit next to his best friend turned enemy number one.
There was no use in avoiding it so he walked to his chair and sat.
"Hey." Nate said casually.
"What's up?" He said in a sarcastic voice.
"Nothing much. How are you and Blair?"
Nate was the most clueless person he knew, "Shut up." Chuck told him.
"I don't know what else I can do. I've apologized countless times. I don't talk to Blair. I leave you guys alone. I do nothing to ruin your life. What else can I do?"
"…Nothing."
"There was a time when I was your best friend. Actually, it wasn't that long ago so I don't know how it could seemingly be erased from your memory."
"It wasn't erased from my memory; I just choose to not think about it."
"Please, Chuck."
"Why do you want me to forgive you so bad? It's not like your life is over without me, you never really cared if I was your friend before, so why now?"
"Of course I cared if you were my friend."
"Then why did you steal her? You were my best friend. Why? It just doesn't make sense. You knew I was in love with her. You knew how much I cared about her. How much I wanted her. Even if I didn't tell you, you knew. I know you did." He had never showed his heart that much to Nate. And probably never would again.
That was the only true reason he was still mad. The one thing he didn't get. The one thing that stopping him from forgiving everything.
"I was confused. I thought I loved her too. And thought you would understand. Since you guys weren't together I told myself it wasn't a bad thing to do, if I wanted to be with her. I was stupid, and I'm sorry." It was heartfelt and true. He wanted his best friend back.
They sat in silence for a few minutes. People were starting to fill up the seats around them and the crowd watching the soon-to-be-graduates was also growing larger. Chuck knew two people in the crowd who would be clapping when he was awarded his certificate would be Eric and Lily.
"I can't believe we're about to graduate." Nate said then laughed, "I remember when we went to our first day of kindergarten together."
"Yeah and the teacher despised me."
"She said you were 'weird'."
"Just cause I was a five-year-old boy and was more fashionable then she was."
"Jealousy."
Chuck smiled; it had been a long time since he'd smiled at Nate. It was practically a silent 'I forgive you.'
Nate held his hand out, blindly hoping Chuck would accept. He did. They shook hands. Forgiving each other.
All the seats were filled now and it was time to start the graduation ceremony. The headmistress put on a speech about how proud she was of this graduation class and how she 'truly' felt they were the future. The valedictorians from both Constance and St. Jude's stood up to the podium.
"Humphrey." Chuck said under his breath and rolled his eyes. He was surprised he hadn't heard Dan was their school's valedictorian.
Nate shoved him with his elbow in a playful manner, telling him to be quiet.
The female valedictorian, to Blair's dismay, was Nelly Yuki. How could she not have known this?
The speech began; Dan was very charismatic, whereas Nelly kept stumbling over words.
"We have reached the end of the road, but are faced with new ones. New paths. And we must choose which to travel. I would like to read a poem from Robert Frost, the path not taken…" Dan shuffled papers and picked the one to read.
Chuck rolled his eyes again; even he had heard this poem about a million times. He wanted the speech to be over so they could carry on with this dreadful mess.
"Two roads diverged in a yellow wood, and sorry I could not travel both. And be one traveler, long I stood, and looked down one as far as I could, to where it bent in the undergrowth.
Then took the other, as just as fair, and having perhaps the better claim, because it was grassy and wanted wear; though as for that the passing there had worn them really about the same.
And both that morning equally lay, in leaves no step had trodden black. Oh, I kept the first for another day! Yet knowing how way leads on to way, I doubted if I should ever come back.
I shall be telling this with a sigh, somewhere ages and ages hence: Two roads diverged in a wood, and I- took the one less traveled by, And that has made all the difference."
Dan finished with the poem, but continued with his speech, "We will be faced with many roads ahead. And we must choose the right one for us. Not the ones everyone else may have taken. For it may change our lives. Be true to yourself, this is our life now. Be you."
Everyone clapped and cheered while Dan and Nelly got off the stage and sat in their seats.
Chuck was surprised by the lack of originality Dan had in his speech. He could've written a more interesting one, in his opinion.
After a few more words from the headmistress she started announcing names. Chuck realized he didn't more than 3/4s of the people in his class. But then again he really didn't give a shit about any one of them, so he didn't feel bad for not knowing their names.
Chuck and Nate's row had to walk to the end of the stage; it would soon be their turn.
"Nathanial Archibald." Everyone clapped as he stepped up and accepted his certificate. Then he walked from the stage. Leaving Chuck to be the next one called.
"Charles Bass." There was clapping as he approached Headmistress Queller. She gave him a stern look, the only reason he was graduating because Lily had made some sort of deal with her. He wasn't sure what, he just knew he shouldn't be graduating but he was. She handed him his paper and turned the tassel to the other side of his graduation cap.
He walked off the stage…no longer a teenage boy in high school. He was expecting to feel more like a man, or like some weight had been lifted off his shoulders. But he felt the same. The weight still seemed to be there and he still felt like that same high school Chuck Bass.
He returned to his seat next to Nate, who looked relieved that he had made it through what were supposed to be the best years of his life. They probably were going to be Nate's best years. He was the golden boy who everyone loved.
Chuck would not regret leaving high school behind. He wanted to move on, become the head of his fathers company, grow up, and have a real relationship with Blair. He thought his life might actually start falling into place after school was all over.
More and more names were read…"Daniel Humphrey." "Serena Van der Woodsen." "Blair Waldorf." They all accepted their certificates and had their tassels switched to the other side.
It was crazy thinking they had made it this far together. Started out in preschool and here they were. Graduating high school. Chuck was hardly the one to think about the 'good ole days', but there were some things he would miss…his friends would be the only good memories of growing up.
All the names had been called, but the headmistress had to make yet another speech.
"Why do they make us where black robes when it's so fucking hot?" Chuck grumbled and rolled up his sleeves a bit.
Nate caught sight of Blair's pin that was on his gown. "Congratulations." He said and nodded towards the pin.
Chuck thought his voice sounded fake with a hint of jealousy, but he ignored it. "Yeah…it was my birthday present."
"Nice…you know what this means, right? You are the property of Blair Waldorf now."
"No…it means she belongs to me…" He corrected him.
Nate didn't answer; it seemed like an awkward situation. He knew Chuck was inadvertently telling him he had his chance with her, but he screwed it up the first time and didn't deserve a second one.
Once the ceremony was over, the graduates parted and went to find their loved ones who were there to celebrate this moment with them.
"I'll talk to you later, okay, man?" Nate waved as he was backing away from him.
"Yeah, sure." He weakly smiled back.
As Chuck walked to find his 'family', consisting of Eric and Lily and also Lily's mother, he saw kids from his school getting hugs from their mother while she was wiping tears from her eyes then the person would hug their father, who looked so proud.
This image made him jealous; he never experienced anything like that. His mother was never there, although that wasn't her fault, and his father never cared enough.
He knew loving parents' open arms weren't waiting for him somewhere in that crowd of people.
He eyed Nate and his mom, his dad was still in jail. Chuck was remorseful of him, but at least his dad loved him. After all, he did go to return his family's life back to normal. He did it for his son.
Chuck's father would've never done that. If he had done something illegal, and was on the run from the FBI, he would simply leave him to fend for himself. At least that's what Chuck thought.
He spotted Serena being congratulated by Eric and Cece, Lily was patting her arm but looking around in the sea of people. He figured she was trying to find him, but he didn't feel like putting on a fake smile right now. So he tried to slip away, back into the crowd.
His back hit someone, and he heard "Oomph!" And the person grabbed at his gown, trying not to fall over. He swiftly turned around to help them, and before he knew it he was holding Blair. His hands on her back, holding her right above the ground. "Blair? I'm sorry; I wasn't looking where I was going."
"Yeah, I noticed." She held onto his shoulders, firmly.
He pulled her up, and now they were close to each other. Only inches away from their faces touching.
"So, I-" He wanted to say something to her, like 'Sorry for being such an asshole.'
"Blair!" Eleanor called over to her; she was about ten feet away and would not be bothered to try to get through the large cluster of people. Blair waved at her and Cyrus, acknowledging that she saw them. She held up her index finger, meaning 'one more minute'.
"Blair, I want to talk to you."
"I know." She kissed him on the cheek, "We can talk later though, it's so busy in here. We should have some peace and quiet. You can pick me up to go to Serena's party."
"Okay." He just said. And she walked towards her family.
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Chuck and the Van der Woodsen family celebrated by going out to lunch after graduation. He was unpleased that he had been unsuccessful in escaping Lily. She was so eager for him to come out with them. But he didn't feel like he belonged there, Cece was so wrapped up in her biological grandparents to even acknowledge he was there.
Serena was very giddy about be a high school graduate, she couldn't stop smiling. Eric was just happy from seeing his sister's inability to frown.
Chuck was about the opposite, he only smiled when he felt like he had to.
After all of that was over Chuck went with Lily while Serena and Eric went to Victrola since he had given her the okay to use it for her party.
He tore off the gown and threw the cap on his dresser. He was sick of putting on some façade of a happy graduate. He felt empty. Not happy or pleased. The only reason he had graduated was because Lily had tempted Ms. Queller with a huge pile of money, most likely.
He lay on his bed and looked at his ceiling. The plain white of it gave him a headache. He closed his eyes, thinking of anything to get his mind off of what a big failure he was. Without even knowing he was tired he drifted into a sleeping state.
Dreams began.
He was surrounded by people, some he knew and some he did not. All were asking him questions. Everyone talking at once, he tried to focus on certain people to make out what they were saying.
"Chuck, why'd you sleep with Blair?! She was my girlfriend!" Nate shouted at him, angrily.
"What about the Kiss on the Lips party, Chuck? How could you do something like that?" Jenny questioned, confused and scared.
"Even your own father hated you." Serena told him, grudgingly.
"He blamed you for killing your mother…maybe you did." Dan added.
People he hadn't even seen before were screaming at him.
"You're just like him aren't you? You have to know everything. Control everyone." Lily appeared hurt.
He spun around, staring at all of them, so confused. Blair approached him slowly, carefully. Chuck stood still and watched her as she put her hands on his cheeks. She touched them softly. She looked as if she were about to cry, her eyes searching every bit of his. And she asked, "Who are you?"
He woke up with a jolt, like he had just been dropped from the ceiling to his bed.
Fucking nightmares, he cursed in his head. He turned over to see what time it was. 8:23.
He'd been sleeping for nearly 4 hours. He rolled out of bed and put on a nicer, less wrinkled outfit. He still planned to talk to Blair, and if he wanted anytime to do that before the party he should leave now.
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Blair prepared for the party by putting on her make-up and curling her hair. Her dress was simple, showed some cleavage. Chuck would like it; she thought when she had picked it out with a smile.
While she was in the middle of putting on blush, Dorota called up to her, "Someone here to see you Miss Blair!"
Shit! Chuck was early! "Okay!" She yelled back and hurried with her make-up.
When there was a small knock at her door, she answered, and with a sultry voice said, "Hi, Baby. You're early." After she opened the door fully and realized who it was, she said, "Nate?" Confused and not looking happy to see him. "What are you doing here?"
"I wanted to talk." He entered her room without being invited.
"About what? I thought everything was said and done. I'm with Chuck now." She didn't bother shutting the door, he wasn't staying long. She would make sure of that.
"That's it? We can't even be friends?"
"I don't know if Chuck would like that very much." Blair really didn't Chuck wanted her hanging out with Nate. He was very much the jealous type. His reaction to simple chat with another guy, just a few days prior, was an example.
"Does he get to decide who you hang out with?"
"You didn't want me visiting him in the hospital when we were together. That's a lot worse."
"Whatever. And anyways we made up. We're friends again."
"I don't know, Nate."
"You don't believe me?"
"Just after everything, I don't know if we could all be friends again." She explained, "You guys can hang out, and I can be with him, but all three of us…it just doesn't sound that simple."
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Chuck rode the elevator up to Blair's apartment, ready for a talk and ready to apologize. He even brought flowers. Peonies, one of her favorites.
Were flowers too much? He questioned himself, becoming nervous. Are they not enough? Would jewelry have been better?
The elevator stopped and the doors opened. He entered, flowers in hand.
Dorota came rushing to see who it was, "Oh." She seemed surprised then became nervous, "Hello, Mr. Chuck."
"Hello, Dorota. Is Blair in her room?" He approached the stairs, but she intercepted his pathway.
"Yes, but Miss Blair is speaking with someone right now."
"Who?" He asked, not knowing who would be talking to her right now. And had she said 'someone'? If it were Eleanor or Cyrus she could've just said so.
Dorota didn't answer, she stood there scared. Having no clue how to tell him she was talking to Nate. She was just a tad bit frightened of how Chuck might react.
But he didn't need her to tell him. He saw Nathaniel's jacket on a chair opposite the stairs. He walked over to it and picked it up, making sure it was his. And it was, without a doubt, Nate's jacket. It had his family crest on it; he had probably just some from a celebration dinner with his whole family.
He threw the jacket down, along with the flowers. Without thinking rationally, he stomped up the stairs.
"Mr. Chuck!" Dorota exclaimed and followed him.
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"I'll have to talk to Chuck about it…" She wanted him to leave and was hoping to say anything to satisfy him for the time being.
"Blair, we can be friends again. Like old times." He got close to her and grabbed her arms.
She smelled alcohol on his breath. It was a natural smell for Chuck, and she even liked the smell of it on his breath. But Nate's breath never smelled like that, and it sickened her. "Have you been drinking?"
"Only a little." He grinned.
"Well you have a low tolerance." She struggled in his grasp.
Chuck was approaching her room quickly and he heard voices coming from inside, but was unable to make out what they were saying.
When he had a clear look of Blair's room and saw Nate, holding her arms, he quickened his pace to a speed walk. Dorota tried to keep up.
"What the hell are you doing?!" He screamed at him. His face was already beat red from anger.
Blair and Nate were startled by him.
"Chuck!" Blair said, in a too cheerful voice. She saw how mad he looked, and how quickly he was coming towards Nate.
"Chuck, I-" Nate started to say.
"Let go of her!" He yelled again and pushed him off.
"Lay off, man! I was talking to her!"
"And you had to have your hands on her? Don't touch her." Chuck said, sternly.
"If we were confident about her loving you, you wouldn't have to worry about me touching her." Nate replied in a smug voice.
Chuck lunged for him, "Chuck! No! He's just drunk!" Blair tried to explain his behavior but it was too late.
He laid a punch right to the jaw line. "Right when I forgave you, you go for her again?"
Nate didn't hesitate in fighting back. He thought a hit to Chuck's eye and gut would take care of the problem, but it just started a full on brawl.
"Stop it!" Blair yelled at them.
Nate's nose was now bleeding and blood was spilling from a laceration Chuck had gotten on his lip.
Chuck felt like he was out of control, Nate felt the same way. He had no clue how he could be doing this to his best friend.
Another punch to the gut. Chuck crumpled over, on his knees, holding his hand to his stomach.
"Chuck!" Blair rushed over to him to see if he was alright. She crouched down to him, so she could try to see his face, "Are you alright?" He groaned a little bit. "Chuck?"
"She doesn't love you," Nate told him plainly, then he bent down and whispered in his ear, "She just feels sorry for you."
Chuck let out what sounded like a growl and got up from his knees. He wrapped his hands around Nate's neck, squeezing as tight as he could.
"Shut the fuck up." Chuck said in Nate's ear. "You don't know what you're talking about. She loves me. Not you. She always loved me." He was choking Nate, but he didn't let up. Something else had taken over his mind completely, the old Chuck Bass. The one who tried to force Jenny and Serena into having sex with him. The one who sent a tip to Gossip Girl, telling that Blair had slept with another guy. Lying and manipulating, just to watch people squirm. The Chuck Bass that would do anything to get what he wanted. And at that moment he wanted Nate dead.
"Chuck! Stop!" Blair screamed, she was frightened and tried to pull on his arms.
But he had no more control over his actions. He didn't stop.
Nate was gasping for air as Dorota helped Blair pull Chuck away from him. Blair held onto him tightly, keeping him from attacking again.
Chuck was out of breath as well, he had been holding it, not to his knowledge.
Nate stood there for a long moment, holding his throat and taking in oxygen.
"What the hell are you doing?! Go!" Blair yelled, what kind of idiot was he for still hanging around?
He ran from the room and Dorota followed slowly. She knew Blair would want some privacy.
When Chuck and Blair were alone there was silence between them until Blair burst into tears. He tried to comfort her by wrapping his arms around her, "its okay." he told her. But she hit him off of her, and kept smacking him.
"What is wrong with you?!" She screamed so loud it could most likely be heard on the streets. "Why would you do that?!"
"He was touching you! What was I supposed to do?" He didn't understand what she meant by 'why would you do that?'.
"What kind of person tries to strangle their best friend?!"
He hadn't even thought of how she would feel about that. It had probably scared her to death. "Blair, I-" He reached out for her, but she backed away from him. "I don't know what came over me. Blair, please…" He reached for her again, but no reciprocation.
There was a pause between them. "Get out." She told him without eye contact.
"What?" He asked, disbelieving what she'd said.
"Get out! I never want to see you again!" Her words stung him, like a hot iron was placed on his hand, or someone had just drove a pitch fork into his stomach. Or maybe that was just his half broken ribs he had acquired from Nate.
"Blair! Are you really taking his side!?"
"I'm not taking his side! I just can't be with someone like you." Strangling someone? She could never look at him the same way.
"Someone like me? Blair you love me."
He could see the hurt in her eyes. She was horrified by what he had tried to do. She was scared of him. And it pained him to see that.
She didn't answer him; she wouldn't even look at him.
"Blair, I'm sorry. You know me. I wouldn't hurt you."
"But you just did, Chuck." The tears fell down her face slowly, like a small trickle of a stream. Small, but constant. "Get out." Her voice was quiet and hesitant, but she meant it.
"Blair-" he tried to get to her once more.
"No! Chuck, it's over! I can't be with you! You're a jealous son of a bitch! It would only end badly."
He starred at her for what seemed like minutes, but was only seconds. No words were in his mouth, he couldn't say anything. His heart had just broken. He thought it was fixed completely and everything would be okay now. But it was shattered, yet again.
"I will never be with you." She said, with a venomous tongue.
There was no way to explain how Chuck felt. No way to describe the pain he felt.
This pain was all too familiar.
He gulped, and closed his wide open mouth. He thought he could feel tears welling up, but he wasn't sure because she didn't seem to be phased by it at all.
Blair held her head high to show she wasn't weak. She wasn't going to cave to his Chuck Bass ways.
He opened his mouth to say something, but nothing was there. He turned away from her slowly and towards the door. Then he went as fast as he could. Out of her room, down the stairs, to the elevator, outside, and to his limo.
Blair sat down on her bed and let her tears fall until there was no more left.
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Chuck arrived at Serena's party, already have drunken a bottle of scotch in the limo. He climbed from the limo ready to forget what had happened at Blair's. he wanted it to be in the way corner of his mind where all the dust and cobwebs were. Never to be thought of again.
But this would never happen. So many times he would try to forget about Blair, but the only time when he wasn't thinking of her is when he had drank so much that he blacked out.
Victrola was already filled with people. Everyone was there.
He found his way inside and to his couch with the best view. He shooed the teens that were already there. Then set himself down and called one of the bartenders over. The bartenders were used to listening to his every beck and call.
"Yes, Mr. Bass?"
"I want every bottle of scotch you have and…the other stuff." He said in a hushed, mysterious voice. He was not accomplishing being secretive.
"Right away, Sir." The bartender hurried off to get him what he asked for.
Sir. Chuck hung on the word. Why did so many people, who were even older than him, call him that? He was in no way his father. He didn't have that kind of authority. Maybe it was because he intimidated people. He could see why. He was a sick son of a bitch, just like Blair had said.
Serena found him, she was much happier than he was. She seemed to be having a fabulous time. "Hey Chuck, where's Blair? I thought you were picking her up."
"She decided she didn't want to come." He said with a straight face, but she could see right through it.
"What happened?"
"It's none of your damn business."
"Fine. But Blair will just tell me tomorrow."
"No she won't."
"Yes she will. I'm her best friend. She's gonna tell me."
"No she won't." He said again, and gave her a glare. He knew she wouldn't talk about it. She wouldn't want tell people about her boyfriend trying to strangle his best friend. He wasn't even sure Nathaniel would say something.
"Whatever, Chuck." She rolled her eyes, then smiled at some people walking by her.
"Some party." He half-complemented her while he stared off.
The bartender arrived with all the scotch he could carry and set them on the table in front of him. "Here you go, Mr. Bass." He leaned over, towards him and slipped something into Chuck's hand.
"Thank you." He dismissed him. He grasped the pills in his hand and hid them from Serena.
"Oh my god. Ridiculous."
"What, Sis?"
"You're pathetic. One fight with Blair and you plan to get wasted out of your mind? Nice drug trade, too." She said with disgust in her voice. "It's time to grow up, Chuck. Face the world like a man. Not everything's going to be how you want it to be. You can't just forget about her."
"Fuck off. Stop acting like you know me. You think cause you've been my friend since grade school that you know who I am? I bet you can't even tell me my middle name…wanna take a crack at it?" He poured himself some scotch into the empty glass.
She was silent, she had no clue. He grinned, devilishly. "See? You never bothered to know me. I was just that other guy you were friends with because Nate and Blair liked me. You never gave a shit about me."
"You're like my brother, Chuck. I care."
"Since when? Since you saw your best friend was in love with me? Since Lily adopted me? I haven't noticed you caring at all, so please, tell me." He twirled the scotch in his hand and took a big gulp.
"What happened with Blair?" She couldn't see where this behavior was coming from, so she figured it had to have something to do with her best friend. There were very few people that could get Chuck so riled up as to order the bar's whole collection of scotch.
He didn't answer, completely ignored her. He instead just nursed his scotch in hand.
"Fine, but don't say I never cared." She left him alone, if she wasn't going to find out from him what had happened, she would call Blair.
Chuck took another swig of the alcohol then popped one of the small white pills in his mouth and swallowed. He leaned against the couch and waited for it to take affect. He grew impatient and took another. He had plenty more, so he wasn't worried about running out.
He watched the slutty girls swing their hips around on stage. Of course that only reminded him of one thing. Blair. They way she had danced for him was not even in the same league as these girls. Memories of the night he had fallen for her flooded his mind.
Tired of the sick and disgusting memories, he took another pill and opened another bottle of scotch. Then pulled a pack of cigarettes from his pocket and lit one in his mouth. He exhaled and watched a large puff of smoke drift away.
He didn't even notice when two girls came and sat on either side of him. He was becoming too numb to notice anything going on around him. One girl stroked his cheek with one finger. He jerked his head in her direction, "Would u mind getting off me?"
"My friend and I just noticed you looked a little lonely without the Ice Queen by your side." She strolled her finger down his neck, her perfectly manicured fingernail scraping at his skin.
"Well how 'bout you get on that stage. Have fun, dance the night away." He told her in a sarcastic tone of voice. "Or if you're looking for someone to comfort why don't you find Nate Archibald. I'm sure he's lonely as hell." He grabbed her hand and threw it off his shoulder, "I don't care what you do, just make sure you stay the hell away from me."
The disappointed girls stood from the couch and walked off, swinging their hips. Conceited whores. He shook his head to knock some sense in. Any other night he would've had sex with those girls. Both of them, at the same time. But Blair was there once again, eating away at him. He felt nothing for any other girl. If Blair would've touched his neck like that, he would've gotten shivers down his spine.
He lit another cigarette. This party was utterly stupid. What was he doing here anyways? He sat awhile longer though, thinking of past times. Why weren't those fucking drugs working?! He should've been so out of his mind by now he shouldn't even remember the name Blair or the face that went with it.
The face that was imbedded in his brain. Her deep brown eyes, and wavy hair. Her sweet lips that curved upwards at the end.
He took another pill, these things were obviously defective or something. He stood up and nearly fell over. He laughed at himself and got steady. Grabbed two bottles of scotch from the table in front of him and began walking. Walking through the crowd of people was difficult, but he eventually got outside.
The air was sticky, which didn't help since he was already beginning to sweat from how hot it was inside.
The sleek leather inside the limo was comfortable. He laid on it and smirked to himself. Thinking of a time, when a certain brunette with milky white thighs had accompanied him to the limo when leaving Victrola.
He would always have a piece of Blair. Inside that limo was memory she would never forget. He may be able to one day forget her, move on, never think of her again, or so he hoped. But every time she thought about her first time, the night she lost her virginity, she would think of him. And he would always have that. Whether that night had ruined the rest of their lives or not, it didn't matter. Because no matter how hard she would try to erase every fiber of his being from her mind. He would be there forever.
It brought some piece to him, Nate could never take that from him. Her virginity was his. And his only. Nate may have been a first for everything else. First kiss, first boyfriend, first love. But Chuck knew which first was the most memorable. He had made sure it was memorable. He wanted it to be the best sex she would ever have.
The limo screeched to a halt in front of the Palace. And he was knocked out of his trance of that night in the limo. He stumbled from the limo, not bothering to wait for the slow driver to open his door.
He tripped over the curb and landed on the side walk. He made sure the two lovely bottle of scotches had gotten out unscathed, then tried to make his way to the door. A few people around the hotel had stopped to watch him trip over his own feet as he walked into the hotel. It was amusing to everyone else.
The people in the lobby and at the front desk watched as he fumbled his way to elevator, finally reaching a point where he could stand still. It took him up to the suite. It was dark and empty. Why was it everywhere he went he was alone?
"Maybe I should get a dog." The words slurred from his mouth and he laughed like it was the funniest thing ever. "Please, a dog wouldn't even like me." He chuckled again. Finding his twisted humor hilarious.
He set the bottles down on the kitchen counter. Loosening his tie and tossing his shoes off somewhere to be found later. He also flung his jacket away, letting it land on the floor. He rolled up his sleeves and poured the scotch into a sparkly clean glass.
"I think you are the one who knows me the best, Scotch. We've had many times together." His laughing didn't stop him from gulping down the scotch.
He grabbed the bottle and slid to the floor. Not wasting time with glasses any longer, he drank straight from the bottle. The liquid burned down his throat. He remembered the first time he had ever tasted the drink…
"What are you drinking, Nathaniel?"
"Beer." Nate guzzled it down and belched. Good thing Blair wasn't there or she would've slapped him for that one.
"Beer is just for people who cant take a real drink."
"Oh really? And what are you going to drink? Champagne?"
That was what he was going to drink, being at the rip age of eleven that was the only thing he had ever drank. But it would be too embarrassing now. He looked through Nate's father's collection of alcohol. Found one that looked good enough and picked it up. It looked like something his father drank often. "No. I'm drinking this."
"And what's that?"
"It's err…umm…scotch." He read the label on it. He poured a large portion of it into a glass and took a drink. It touched his tongue and burned all the way down his throat. Feeling it in his stomach like he had just drank Windex. He gagged and coughed. "Oh my god." He held his throat. "I think I'm dying Nate. I think someone is trying to poison your father, but they got me instead!" He choked and moved his way over to the couch and sprawled out next to Nate.
"You're an idiot." Nate said, and kept drinking his beer.
"Am not…I really like it." He lied, "It's great, way better than beer." He slowly took another drink, afraid of the burning but he wanted to show Nate he was more experienced than him.
"Whatever." He laughed at him.
He would end up showing Nate, since only three short months after that he would have sex for the first time. Before Nate…before any other person he knew. Maybe it wasn't something he shouldn't be proud of. Everyone else thought he was pig. But who cared what other people think, right? Well actually he did care.
He sat for a long time. Thinking of Blair. Sipping his scotch.
"I will never be with you." Her words rang in his head over and over.
Why did this darkness follow him wherever he went? He could never escape it. Could never be happy. Because misery seemed to be his middle name. He was destined for it. He had practically already let it take over his whole life.
He removed Blair's pin from his pants pocket. Holding it lightly in his hand. "What was the point?" He asked himself. There was no point in her having given him that pin now.
He loathed how she could get his hopes all high and expecting good things to come of their relationship. When in reality they were doomed. He should've known that.
It was like fighting fire with fire. They were too similar, their personalities didn't balance each other out. There was just too much evil for one couple to withstand.
His life was so screwed up. What was the point?
What was the point?…He found himself in a position he already been in before.
But this time he tried to rationalize with himself. His life wasn't too bad right? It would get better…right?
But he came to the conclusion…no. It would not get better. He hadn't sunken so low, he couldn't recover this time.
He took another swig of his almost empty bottle.
There was only one way out of this nightmare.
He dropped the bottle beside him then rummaged through the drawers. He found what he was looking for…a knife. Large, and pointed. It would get the job done.
He sat down again. Thinking. What would people think of him? Call him pathetic, most likely. But no one understood what it was like to be him. What it was like to be haunted by your own mind so much it drove you crazy. There was no escape from it…except that knife. It was the one and only solution.
He held it tightly in his hand. So tight his knuckles were turning white and the veins in his hands were very defined.
Then before he could change his mind, possibly save himself from all this, he dug the blade into his skin. He expected there to be pain, but he didn't feel anything. He felt numb. He couldn't feel anything.
He cut the other wrist.
What a worthless piece of shit he was, thinking as the blood dripped from the wounds. Doing this again? Could he not take anything like a man? Really? No wonder Blair didn't want to be with him. But it soon wouldn't matter because he would be gone.
Even in these moments all he could think of was Blair. Her magnificent beauty, her tender touch, the way she made him feel like he had a reason to live.
His vision began to blur and he laid against the cold tile. He felt light headed and dizzy. Everything seemed to be spinning.
"Hi!" The small blonde girl chirped.
"Hi." He muttered back.
"Can me and my friend play with you guys?"
"Sure…" His best friend answered for him, knowing that he didn't like to share and wanted to be nice to the girls.
They plopped down next to them.
Chuck gulped as the tiny brunette sat very close.
"Hi, I'm Blair. What's your name?" She smiled a cute four-year-old smile.
"I'm Chuck Bass." He said with really no facial expression.
"You're cute." She said perkily, and gave him a quick peck on the cheek.
He could feel the wet blood around his hands, small pools were already forming.
His vision was so blurred, nothing seemed real anymore. His heart slowed…
His breathing slowed…
And then all there was, was darkness.
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I finally finished it! I know, I know. Horrible ending. Don't criticize too harshly. I did work really hard. And there's going to be a sequel so obviously it's not the end of the whole story! But please, please! Do review! It's the last chapter, and I would love to hear what you have to say! Just please, edit some of your angry comments towards me. But I'm still practically begging you to write a review!
The first chapter of the sequel should be posted very soon! By the time you're reading this it may already be posted. You can go on my profile and click on it, or you can search for it or whatever. But if it's not posted yet, keep an eye out for it. It's called What's Left.
Here's a little preview…
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Lily's hand shook as she reached out for his body. Covered in blood, he laid there. Still as a rock.
She took a gasp of air in, as she had been holding her breath as soon as she saw him.
Her knees were touching the blood pool around his lifeless body.
She felt sick to her stomach, and was having trouble taking normal breathes. They were short, wheezing breaths of air.
"Ma'am? Ma'am are you still there?" She heard from the phone that she had dropped on the floor as soon she had called 911 and told them about him and to come right away.
She didn't answer and she got up the courage to touch his body. She finally laid her hand on his chest. Then moved up to his face. It was cold and pale. All the colors of his cheeks were long gone.
"Charles?" She choked out. She thought maybe he would still be able to hear her. She was too naïve.
His expressionless face was still and had the look of death.
She began to sob and reached out to hold him. She cradled him in her arms, and tears rolled down her face into his hair.
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"Please, please. Take a step back miss. You too ma'am." The paramedic struggled with Serena and Lily as the tried to stay close to him. They were wheeling him down the hall on a stretcher. The destination was the ER…or the operation room. They weren't entirely certain where they were taking him. "Please, you can't go any further!"
A few nurse held onto Serena and her mother to stop them from following him anymore.
Serena burst into tears, Lily hadn't stopped crying. "Where are they taking him?!" The younger blonde shrieked.
One nursed held Serena in her arms, shushing her. "They're going to do all the can do to help your friend."
"He's not my friend, he's my brother!" She screamed at the nurse which caused heads to turn. She shoved the burse away from her.
"Okay. I'm sorry. They're going to try their best to help your brother." she rubbed her arm, soothingly. "Will you and your mother follow me?"
"No, I want to wait here for him." Lily said.
"It might be awhile, you'll probably want to sit down."
"She said we'll wait here for him!" Serena snapped again.
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"No! No! Nooo!" Blair bawled and yelled at the top of her lungs. She held him in her arms. She hugged him tightly and intertwined her fingers in his hair.
Lily and Serena sat around Chuck on the hospital bed in sorrow. Eric was leaned against the wall, a look of anger plastered on his face.
Serena had a blank stare, as she drained out her best friend's painful shrills.
Somehow tears still found a way to fall from Lily's eyes, when you think she would be all out of them by now.
Eric was growing tired of Blair and her voice. He turned around and punched the wall. "My god, Blair! Shut the hell up!" he left the room in a quick, angry pace.
Her eyes were already red and puffy, her nose was running and her voice was cracked. "What happened?" She barely got out in a small voice.
Lily just sat there, still as a fucking statue. But Blair's question snapped Serena out of her trance. "You tell me."
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