A/N: I suck, and I haven 't updated for a while. I know that this chapter is beeeyond short, but I thought that maybe it'd be so unexpected that it would be ok *puppy dog eyes* It's like 5am and I just wrote this crap, so please blame every lil' mistake on me :D.

Thank you to everyone who's sent me reviews. I wouldn't keep doin' this if it wasn't for you! Thanks again to sluggysmom, and I hope that others will send me some love too :D

Oh yeah, no money… blah blah blah… funny kitchen appliances… blah blah blah. Love ya' CH!

Chapter 21

The Ancient Pythoness' POV:

I hadn't felt this amount of amusement in many millennia. My dead chest ached with the force of my wheezing laughter. 'When had I last had an occasion to laugh?' I questioned myself. 'Ah', I recalled the moment perfectly. Centuries span between any sources of amusement, and I found myself marveling at the fact that one being has been cause for my mirth twice within a single decade.

The vision that floods my blind eyes is of the immediate future; The unexpected vision has me clutching my sides in my hilarity; it is a great relief that I have not felt pain for several thousand years, for my gnarled knuckles would surely be feeling the strain were I human.

Felipe de Castro was in for the most terrible future imaginable. The frayed sleeves of my purple robes were quivering with my devious laughter when a servant opened the door to my sacred chamber.

' Oh, I know who this must be…'

The servant girl was beautiful and clad in an immaculate set of purple robes embroidered with gold thread. Although I was content with my dusty attire as a sign of my ancient authority, I would not allow my servants to appear as paupers. Theata waved her hand in a practiced motion and ushered my guest inside.

Felipe de Castro was dressed very well indeed. While I could not see him, I have learned long ago to 'see' with my other senses. De Castro smelled of velvet and satin, modern hair gel and leather. My precise ears could hear the swish of his silk-lined cape and the slight crinkle of his skin as he smiled and bowed before me

The small current of air borne from his movements wafted other smells to me also: Felipe's dried blood... Northman's steel sword... Sookie's Fae tears... and a trace of Were… 'Oh, this will be painful indeed!'

I cackled darkly. "Delicious".

I heard the regent's expression of confusion with my sensitive ears. He knelt before my ivory throne and I answered the King's unspoken question:

"Oh yes, Felipe", I whispered with a smile, "You are royally fucked."