A/N: Hey guys! Thanks for the awesome support! It's nice to know there are still people who remember this puppy. Happy Holidays! Here's my present to you! Also, I revamped the chapter titles, if anyone actually reads those… Now they're not just boring numbers.
And to my anonymous reviewers:
"Guest:" Go Doctor Who! And thanks for the review!
"Guest:" Thanks! Although I don't think "funniness" is a word, it is no cause not to use it! Toast? How so? Thanks for your enthusiasm and the review!
(Jeeze… FanFiction needs to make a better system for anonymous "Guest" reviewers….)
Disclaimer: All recognizable material belongs to its rightful owners.
~ ONE HUNDRED SEVENTY ONE ~
Wake up, Eragon. I'm bored. Said little Saphira.
It's 3am!
I want to play.
Well I want to sleep.
How about I race across your bed a few dozen times?
How abou—"Ouch!"
~ ONE HUNDRED SEVENTY TWO ~
"We need a way to foil Galbatorix's plan," stated Nasuada.
King Orrin was scratching down figures "I've found it!"
"Yes, what is it?"
"Simply said: pa+pn+la+ln"
"I don't follow…"
"I've followed his plan. His (p+l)(a+n)."
~ ONE HUNDRED SEVENTY THREE ~
"Orik, no! Don't go out there it's not safe."
"I'm just going to walk to my tent."
"But it just rained!"
"And?"
"There's puddles," stated Eragon concerned. "Don't step in any puddles, you might drown!"
~ ONE HUNDRED SEVENTY FOUR~
A ring sounded from Nasuada's pocket, signaling an email. It read:
"Guys, just needed to tell you that big corporations are just evil blood suckers and I won't stand it. –sent from my iPhone"
~ ONE HUNDRED SEVENTY FIVE ~
Help me! Shouted little Saphira.
What is it now? Growled an irritated Eragon.
I stepped on some paper and now it's stuck to my claw.
Just pull it off.
I'm too scared. What if it eats me? I can feel its little teeth slowly eating away at me!
It's just paper. Take it off. I'm busy.
But now I'm walking all funny!
~ ONE HUNDRED SEVENTY SIX ~
'There's a meeting tomorrow morning. Be there," said Nasuada.
"Will there be food?" asked King Orrin.
"Erm, no."
"Count me out!"
~ ONE HUNDRED SEVENTY SEVEN ~
Galbatorix was crying when Murtagh entered his throne room. Confused, Murtagh asked "What's wrong?"
The king sniffed and looked up. "Everyone hates me. My subjects hate me. My dragon hates me. You hate me."
"It's okay," said Murtagh patting Galbatorix's back. "I don't hate you. I'm just not necessarily excited about your existence."
~ ONE HUNDRED SEVENTY EIGHT ~
Eragon spluttered at the coffee he was given. "This coffee is gross," commented Eragon as he adjusted his perfectly casual plaid flannel shirt. "Let me guess, you didn't use filtered water that was heated to exactly 164.8 degrees, did you?"
~ ONE HUNDRED SEVENTY NINE ~
"Hey Arya! Orik! I've got a great joke!" shouted Eragon. The elf and dwarf let out a collective groan. "Come on, guys. You'll love it!"
"Fine," sighed Arya. "What is it?"
"Alright. So an elf walked into a bar. A dwarf laughed and walked under it." Eragon laughed and looked at the two. He was meet with two annoyed looks.
~ ONE HUNDRED EIGHTY ~
There's a bird outside, commented Little Saphira, who was looking intently out the window.
And I care because? Answered Eragon.
It's taunting me.
No, it isn't. It's just minding its own business. Stop thinking about it.
I'm going to jump at it.
No. Don't! You'll break the window!
Then do me a favor.
What?
Shoot. That. Bird.
A/N: Review, tell me your fav blurb(s), and/or leave a suggestion, tell me what your pet did, bake a cake, eat a cookie, make a blanket fort, dabble in quantum physics, make a work of art, steal candy from a baby, time travel, save a penguin, dress up your pet rock, reorganize your colored pencils, dig up the old family album…
And remember: "Knowledge is knowing a tomato is a fruit; wisdom is not putting it in a fruit salad." ~Miles Kington