why's it gotta be that everybody's gotta see the sadness
Everybody's lonely, we don't have to be lonely
Baby, no baby oh, I can move you like an earthquake
Listen to me as my hands shake
Cause I want you, I need you
I can't live without you, baby

Baby don't move at all
Cause you're about to break my fall
Stay where you are, staring at the stars
Don't ever move...

[chapter twenty

It was nine o clock, Patrick was over. We were sitting on the couch Patrick was attempting to read my palm.

"Are you sure you know what you're talking about?" I asked. He shook his head.

"Um...yeah. I was reading a book on it earlier today...see this is your love line...your lifeline..."

"Um...okay."

"It looks like your destined to live a...really really short life." he said.

"Oh, thank you."

"But...you're gonna have a lot of sex...but only one child."

"Um..."

"Yeah."

"Be wrong."

"Yeah I hope." We laughed and he slid closer to me. I leaned on him lightly and he wrapped his arms around my shoulders. "So where's your mom at?" he asked.

"Oh...um...she left."

"School tonight?"

"...no. She's on a plane to Minnesota. My dad needs her there for the finalizing of the divorce. She'll be back next week."

"Oh...well then...okay. So what are you doing this whole time?"

"Staying here. She left me like 300 bucks for groceries and takeout and shit so...I'm good."

"Sweet." he said. I looked up at him. "Well, not sweet as in the divorce, but sweet as in...home alone for a week."

"Yeah I guess. It'll get old after a while though."

"Maybe not if I stick around."

"Ooh, like the sound of that." I said. He kissed my cheek once and left a trail of them across my jaw line, coming towards my lips. He nipped at my lower lip, something he hadn't done before, and so I went with it. Something in him was more intense than usual. His hands explored my stomach, my hips, my chest, and it gave me chills all over. He felt me shiver and pulled away from my lips. Still desperate for contact, he left his face buried in my neck and spoke from there.
"You okay?"

"I'm fine." I breathed.

"You know Heather...you make me so fucking nervous sometimes." he muttered, following it with a tentative bite at my neck. My hand found his knee and traveled the inside of his thigh.

"Nervous now?" I asked. He didn?t even answer me, just crashed his lips against mine again.

His hands, around my hips, pushed me backwards a little bit, almost asking me if I wanted to, and so I put my head to the cushion of my own power. He collapsed over me, alternating between lips, jaw, and neck. It never really occurred to me before, but now it was obvious that he'd done this before. I didn?t really mind; I had too. But Scott...it was nothing like this. He wasn?t this sensual at all...Patrick's hands kept traveling from my shoulders to my hips and back again, like he was afraid to do anything else. I'd finally had enough of this foreplay bullshit and got a hold of one of his wrists, guiding it downward. He paused for a second before finding the zipper of my jeans, taking the little metal tab and flicking it a little, before finally dragging it down. Once the zipper was down, a heat erupted between us. He slipped his hand into my jeans in an attempt to get them off. I too was working casually at the hem of his shirt, teasing him ever so slightly. I finally pulled it over his head. So wait, I lost my jeans and he lost his shirt. This wasn?t going to work. I started work on his belt, and my hand brushed against the unexpectedly large lump growing just beneath. Upon contact with my hand Patrick basically went crazy. He slid his hands under my shirt, sliding them along my stomach and up. I helped the meaningless fabric over my own head. I finally just broke the kiss to look down and get his belt off. He got fed up too and pulled it off effortlessly with his own hand. I slid them down and kicked them off, exposing boxers. So down to the underwear. Patrick released my lips, leaving me to breathe heavily and started trailing his mouth down my neck to my chest, using his teeth on occasion. He sunk his teeth into my bra and one hand reached up my back, squeezing the hooks together and forcing them to unclasp. I pulled it clumsily off me and threw it in a pile with the other clothes. Looking down as his head working it's way down my stomach, I decided that his hat was no longer appropriate. I threw it behind me and tangled my fingers in his hair. I shuddered again as his lips and tongue touched the area right between my navel and the band of my underwear. As soon as he felt fabric on his lips he slid back up to kiss me again. I could feel him pressing into my thigh and I could practically hear him pining to get out of the boxers. Instead of abiding by his plea I slipped my hand inside and grabbed him. He let out a soft moan.

"Fuck Heather..." I pulled off my own last remaining garment and let them fall, but left him in his pants. "No fucking fair." he muttered. He quickly pulled his boxers off and discarded them as well. I had to say there was something to this skin-to-skin contact thing. At this point, while Patrick seemed to be regaining control of himself, it all became too much for me. I arched my back and pushed my hips up, trying to meet his. He let out a small laugh

"Patrick come on...fuck, come on..."

"Ahhh I don't know..." in response I bit him where shoulder became neck. I broke the skin, but only enough to make the slowest trickle of blood dribble foreword. The psycho in me took over and I licked it up. I got the smallest of moans out of him, he was a quiet little fucker (no joke intended) sometimes wasn?t he? Finally, at the moment I least expected it he entered me. God...we were moaning together into each other's mouths. His hips moved up and down, and I tried to move mine in his rhythm, but he pinned my hips down with his hands, holding me still.

"Oh come ON." I whispered.

"Calm down, just wait." he said.

"Mr. take control huh?" I asked.

"When I know what I'm doing."

"Oh you dirty little Slut."

"Thank you." But he was right. After changing angles maybe twice, he hit a spot that made me scream out in unexpected ecstasy. My hips jolted up, breaking Patrick's hold on them. "Told you." he moaned.

"Shit Patrick do that again." he did and it forced another scream out of me. Realizing just how much that got to me, he hit it with every other thrust and soon my screaming stopped, and I just replaced it with moans that seemed to drive him harder. I closed my eyes and bit my bottom lip as my best signal that I was close. Like I could honestly fucking talk. He dove back for my lips and that just added to the sensuality of it all, making it even harder to wait for him. I wanted it to happen simultaneously. He inhaled sharply and pulled out, warm liquid probably ending up all over the couch/floor. Honestly I didn?t give a fuck. Three or four more thrusts, all to that one spot, and it happened. My eyes went wide open and I let out my loudest moan yet. My back arched so much that it hurt and I tried to force my hips upwards, prolonging the time before he left me and it was over. I dug my nails into his back, probably (hopefully) drawing blood. We both went limp and fell over the edge of the couch, collapsing instead in a heap on the floor together, and within minutes, I was asleep.