Chapter Twenty-One

SIX MONTHS LATER

Bucky looked over at Madeline, "I don't get it," he said looking at her like she was insane.

The last six months had been some of the best in Madeline's life, even with the lows that came along with it. Bucky had been making slow progress, he kept remembering more and more, somethings he knew but couldn't remember context or emotion. He could remember his parents, he knew their names and what they had looked like, and intellectually he knew he should love them, but he couldn't remember the feeling. That seemed to be the hardest for him, context of emotion. Interestingly enough, that was the hardest part of a memory to map. It was easy to map the principle idea, but the thing that made it a true memory, was the emotion behind it, that was proving the hardest thing for Madeline's team to quantify. Until they could manage that , Bucky was stuck with the old school, run of the mill neurologist on his side.

Shortly after their discussion in the kitchen, things got much worse for Bucky. His dreams continued to be terrifying for him, horrible memories were flooding back to him during consciousness. When Madeline address Dr. Lang about these issues Sandra assured her, as painful as it was, it really was a good thing. Because Bucky had started having emotions he hadn't had in so long, trust, care, concern, it unfortunately opened the flood gates for all the emotions he had been repressing; guilt, anger, fear.

But now things were finally evening out. Madeline and Bucky had fallen into a familiar pattern, neither of them mentioning what had been said in the kitchen. But something was definitely different between them. Madeline didn't hesitate to touch him on the arm or the back, and he didn't flinch or stiffen under her touch any more. Whenever he did have severe night terrors Madeline would talk him down and then spend the night with him. They never really acknowledged this. It seemed far to complicated for either of them to want to address.

A part of Madeline wanted to delve right into it. Find out what Bucky had meant by care about her, the same thing she had meant? But at the same time, she was quite fine just not mentioning it because she had no idea what to say. She had never done this before. Never had a boyfriend or gone on a date. For the first time in her life, she admitted she wished her mother had been there. Sure she could talk to Pepper, but it just didn't seem quite the same. Besides, Madeline could never keep up with her and Tony's relationship and Madeline felt getting advice from someone in a completely stunted relationship didn't seem like the most intelligent choice.

Right now, Madeline and Bucky sat on the couch talking about climbing. Madeline had suggested they go climbing that weekend. "What do you mean 'you don't get it'?!" She looked at him like he was the insane one.

"I don't see what is enjoyable about climbing something, someone else has climbed already, especially when it comes with great personal risk."

Madeline felt her mouth drop open, "What are you talking about?! It's about pushing yourself to your limit. Accomplishing something you didn't think you could do! Doing something only a handful of people can do!"

Bucky raised his eyebrows, shaking his head, "Doesn't seem like that much of a challenge."

Madeline kicked his hip with her foot, "Well, not to you!" He chuckled at her frustration. Then it caught in her mind, 'great personal risk' of course Bucky wasn't worried about himself. He had a tendency of treating her like she was made of glass. "Trust me, it isn't a hard face, and you must be getting stir crazy. Aside from our runs, you never leave this apartment. We could be outside in nature, weather is gonna be beautiful."

He looked like he was thinking. Madeline really didn't want to force him to do this, this weekend, because this was gonna be it. She was gonna tell him she was madly and completely in love with him. Having never done that before she figured somewhere beautiful would be nice. And after climbing a rock face? Perfect setting as far as she was concerned. And if he didn't say it back well, oh well, but she had to say something because it was driving her mad. She figured the fact she was fantasizing over his brain scans was a pretty good indicator that she needed to say something.

Madeline pulled her knees up underneath her, raising herself up onto her heels, Bucky looked at her raising an eyebrow. "Look, I haven't been climbing in like two and a half years since I did Everest with dad, so I have a pretty big itch. I am going, and I will even let you climb ahead of me, and I will carabiner myself to you." Madeline could stop herself from rolling her eyes, "Boring, but safe as possible." She put on her most innocent face and Bucky looked like was just about to give in when her phone rang on the coffee table.

He looked at the phone then back at Madeline, "You should get that."

She scowled at him, "You're just trying to change the subject."

"Could be the lab, weren't you waiting for my latest blood work?" She wanted to argue with him but he had her with that.

She glared, "I'm sure it's no one." She picked up the phone and the name Uncle Tony was across the screen, "Shit," she looked at Bucky. He hadn't seen the screen. Madeline had been pretty studiously avoiding talking about the Starks. Every time they did come up Bucky would instantly become distant and tense, and Madeline couldn't for the life of her figure out why. She didn't ask him about it, she figured if it was something he wanted to discuss with her, he would. Bucky looked at her, "I do have to get this, but I won't forget what we were talking about."

"I'm sure," he muttered as Madeline leapt over the back of the couch and ran onto the balcony.

She picked up the phone, "Hi Uncle Tony!" She said brightly.

"Well there's my girl! Geez, it's easier for me to speak to the president then it is for me to get you on the phone!" Madeline had also been avoiding talking to the other Stark. She didn't want to lie to her uncle but she couldn't be honest with him, as technically he was one of the people who was supposed to be looking for the Winter Soldier by the sheer fact he was an Avenger now.

"Oh well, you know how it is. Breakthroughs don't come from sitting with your thumb up your ass."

"Spoken like a Stark," He sounded proud.

"Thought you would like that," Madeline chuckled.

"You still at the lab?" He asked.

Madeline had a moment of panic. If he was calling from the Suit, he might be flying by, wanting to drop in. If she said yes he would go to Wayne Tower and freak when she wasn't there. If she said she was at home, he could simply swoop down on the very balcony to see Bucky sitting on her sofa. "Uh, on my way home." She answered vaguely.

"Wow, that's early. It's only seven thirty!?"

"I am trying this new thing were I don't work myself into exhaustion. Going pretty good so far." Madeline said nonchalantly.

"What's his name?" Was her uncles deadpan response.

"Wh-what?" Madeline stuttered.

"The only way Starks prioritize anything over work is when it has to do with a tug on the old heart strings. And even then sometimes...not so much. So what's his name? Must be some guy."

"There's no guy, Uncle Tony,"

"Girl?"

"No, but good to know your actually are as liberal as you say you are,"

"Mazel tof,"

"For the record, it's guys. And there isn't one, and even if there was, I certainly wouldn't tell you, or you and your Avenger buddies would swarm the poor guy."

"Damn straight I would! Glad to hear there isn't any schmuck though."

"Hey! How come he would be a schmuck? I have good taste!"

"Based on your mother's taste, I would like to hold judgement on that till I see real evidence."

"Hey!" Maddy snapped but as per usual Tony ignored her.

"Look, it works out better for me, because now you have no to reason to turn down my invitation for the weekend."

Madeline's heart dropped out from her chest. She looked up through the window at Bucky who was sitting on the couch. He was just staring into space, waiting for her to come back in. "Well, I kind of was planning on going climbing," Madeline said weakly.

"Pppfhh," Tony scoffed, "You can do that any time. Look, I need an exceptionally attractive date for this weekend. The Smithsonian are opening a new exhibit as part of the Captain America wing."

"Oh god, not Ironman Land," Maddy teased, turning to face the city, leaning against the railing.

Tony chuckled, "You know, I have had that thought... Maybe I should start some mock ups..."

"Uncle Tony? This weekend?" Madeline prompted.

"Right, right, so no, not Iron man but it is for the Avengers. So, we all kinda have to be there, and I haven't seen my dearest niece in far too long."

"We've both been busy." Madeline said lamely into the phone.

"Regardless, come on, say you'll come. I can introduce you to the whole gang! ...Wow, that is literally the first time I have ever actually said that?!"

Madeline rolled her eyes, "What about Pepper? Shouldn't she be your date?"

"Pepper is busy with Stark Industries." The answer was vague and clipped and Madeline knew better than to pester him about it.

"Uncle Tony, I have so much going on at the Lab right now. Practically a million balls in the air-"

"So crazy your home before eight thirty?" He interrupted. Madeline opened her mouth to argue but she knew she had no defence. Tony knew her too well. He had been the one coming to her room at three in the morning when she had been in med school demanding she go to bed, or he wouldn't sign the form for her to add another advanced course on her curriculum. He knew her work ethic. "Look, I will have a helicopter pick you up at the penthouse," Madeline looked to her right at the Helipad off the dining room, "I'll get you a nice hotel for the night and make sure the helicopter is ready to go by eight in the morning, just in case you are lagging from a hang over."

"You know I don't drink," Madeline scoffed.

"Another fabulous Wayne trait."

"Really?" Madeline asked shaking her head.

"Come on Maddy, it's one night, in DC. A two hour helicopter ride at most. You can leave Gotham for one night, Wayne Tower won't burn down without you. Besides, I would like to think I have some semblance of a family left, and if I don't get to show you off at one of these things the guys are gonna think I made you up."

Madeline sighed, she did miss her uncle. They may have their ups and downs but he had been there for her. He invited her into his home without any understanding, whatsoever, of teenage girls. He helped her with her school work and always tried to make sure she had fun. "Just one night?"

"Scouts honour,"

"You were kicked out of the boy scouts."

"Well, yeah, but no one was hurt when cabin exploded, so I still feel they overreacted. People are so small minded when it comes to chemistry experiments."

Madeline laughed, "Yeah, ok fine. What time?"

"I'll have the chopper pick you up at four in Gotham, then we can grab dinner before the event. Buy yourself something pretty to wear on my card."

Maddy rolled her eyes, "I can buy myself a new dress, Uncle Tony,"

"I know that dear, but I want to. I'll see you on Saturday?" He really did sound excited.

"I'll see you then."

"Alright, Love you Kiddo, take care of yourself."

"I will Uncle Tony, I love you too." As they hung up Madeline had this rush of guilt wash over her. She turned on the deck to look back into the apartment. Bucky had stood up and just turned at the same time as her. Their eyes met, and she smiled at him. A small smile pulled at the right corner of his mouth.

How could she possibly explain to her uncle about Bucky? She didn't know where he stood on the search for the Winter Soldier. She never discussed his avenging with him. Had no real reason to until now. But now? Now things were different...

Madeline took a breath and walked into the penthouse, "So, we will have to take a rain-check on the climb this weekend." Bucky looked almost relieved. Madeline had become an expert at recognizing his micro expressions, from a pull at his lip, a hitch in his brow, a ripple on his forehead. Probably from borderline obsessively watching his face when he wasn't looking. God, this falling in love thing was complicated, it was enough to make anyone go mad. "I have to go to DC to see my uncle."

Bucky's jaw clenched, there it was. That reaction to a Stark. "Your going on your own?"

Madeline was caught off guard by the question. Surely Bucky didn't want to come along to see old Uncle Tony? "Well, yeah, it's for some Avengers event at the Smithsonian."

Bucky suddenly looked agitated, "Are you sure this is a good idea?"

Madeline blinked, shrugging she answered, "I don't see why not."

Bucky took a step towards her, "If they find out you're helping me-"

Madeline shook her head, "No one is gonna find out. No one had a clue you are even still in the country. If they did, I think the knock on the door would have already happened." She closed the gap between them stopping about a foot away from him, "I'll be fine, I have a good poker face." She took a deep breath, watching Bucky, hoping the concern wasn't written all over her face.

"What?" He asked, his brow in turn furrowing. Maybe she wasn't that good at poker...

"Well, I am just thinking. What about you? Will you be ok if I leave for the night?"

Bucky shook his head cavalierly, "I'll be fine Madeline, I can make it on my own for one night." He turned away from her and headed to the kitchen.

"Bucky," He stopped before walking down the hall, he turned and looked at her and Madeline found she had nothing to say. She had been planning on just saying it, saying I am falling in love with you, just like that but somehow when he turned to look at her, she found she couldn't. Instead she ended up just shrugging lamely, "Do you wanna help me pick out a dress?"