Dedicated to that deathly decadent cheerful cherub, Non Innocent Angel. Or... NIA! So... So close to MIA...
Diss the Claim: Velcome... To my hoh-mble ah-bode! *ceiling falls in* Iz true, I do nah-t earn the monies from theez.
Warning(s): preslash, OOC!main characters, ridiculousness for the sake of ridiculousness, insanity
G/Fl Edit: 12/15/2014
"What about a leprechaun could possibly be a clue?" Ron mused as he attempted to detangle the little bugger from his hair. He hadn't slept very well for- well a week. First the worry for Harry and- ugh- Malfoy in the Tasks, then that horrible letter from his mum about getting his grades in Potions and History of Magic up that had turned out to be a prank from the twins, and then...
"I can't tell ye, laddy," The leprechaun bemoaned, "I would if I could, see. Anything for a fellow countryman, but I woul'n't live if I tried ta go up 'gainst that there Dumblydore."
Ron sat up in the curiously purple bed he'd found himself in when he awoke. He'd recognized it as another bedroom in the Room of Requirement due to the horrid color scheme and had remembered enough of Harry's threat to sleep through dinner. The leprechaun climbed around the back of his head like a spider to hang from his other ear. Ron quickly detached him and put him down on the bed in front of him. Ignoring the muttered, "Destroyin' me fun, 'e is..." Ron asked, "Can you tell me if I'm getting close?"
The little hominid carefully thought this over and brightened considerably, "By Jove, I think I can!"
Ron and the leprechaun cheered for this sudden break through merrily and the leprechaun began to dance around Ron as Ron danced in place at the unfamiliar feeling of triumph (at least when not connected with a chess game).
This is what Harry peeked in on a minute or so later and giggled in a most un-manly manner. Shocked at himself, he cleared his throat and gave a low, rumbly chuckle. Draco, meanwhile, was trying not to cry from the effort he was expending stifling his hysterical laughter at Harry's double reaction.
"Oh, shut up, Draco," Harry gave in and grinned, nudging Draco's shoulder with his own.
"Didn't say anything," Draco asserted innocently.
"Uh-huh," Harry replied dubiously.
"COLD!" A Scottish brogue shouted from the guest bedroom. "OH, E'EN COLDER! ICY!"
Draco and Harry shared an odd look before fully entering the room. The leprechaun was dangling off the back of Ron's head, with his toes gripping the snarl-holds he'd created towards the top.
"Erm, Scotland?" Ron guessed helplessly.
"Oh, I'm gettin' freezerburn, lad!" The wee man gesticulated wildly enough that he fell out of the snarl-holds and down onto the bed.
"What are you doing?" Draco sat down on the bed with one eyebrow inching its way over the other as the leprechaun scurried back up Ron.
"I second that," Harry agreed as he plopped down on the bed and inadvertently shook the leprechaun's hold enough for him to drop once again, "Sorry."
"Eh," The red-haired midget waved it off and took a flying leap to Ron's shoulder.
The only brunette in the room started off a one-man round of applause, "That was impressive!"
As the little leprechaun bowed and blew kisses to the "crowd," Ron answered Draco's almost forgotten query, "I was guessing what a leprechaun could mean as a clue, 'cause he can't just tell us, but Professor Dumbledore didn't say anything about telling us if we're close."
Draco stared at the Gryffindor redhead in shock (He has a brain?) while Harry abandoned the clap on the shoulder at the last second for a proud handshake, "That's my chess-master best mate!"
Ron beamed at the praise, "Well, Sean helped."
"Sean?" Harry and Draco echoed.
"Yes?" The small creature popped its own head out from behind Ron's.
"Ah, nothing," Harry hastily amended.
"Alright, then," Sean disappeared to re-find his precious snarl holds.
"Hey, Sean, what about four-leaf clovers?" Ron's eyes near-seized as he tried to roll them back enough to see the leprechaun.
"I'm shiverin'. I think I got an icicle drippin' off me nose."
"How about er, the color red?" Harry volunteered.
"Are ye tryin' ta gi' me frostbite?"
"Fool's gold?" Draco offered disinterestedly, observing the way his fingers looked corpse-pale when entwined with Harry's.
"An' now I'm on fire!" Sean crowed. Everyone perked up and gave the leprechaun their attention.
"Is it some kind of trick?" Harry asked eagerly, "A puzzle?"
"Er, ye were warmer on the first one."
"The second Task is about courage, though; not trickery," Draco pointed out confusedly, having actually paid attention to their short briefing after the Goblet had selected them.
"So... Some sort of terrifying illusion?" Ron scratched out one of the leftover snarl holds on the side of his head.
"Blazin' hot! My, I think I may melt!" Sean swooned dramatically on the top of Ron's head. He opened one eye, "Though not as hot as it could be."
"Is it a spell?" Harry's grip on Draco's hand had tightened in his excitement and now he leaned forward, eyes sparkling.
"Cooler. I can breathe easy now, not nearly as humid."
"A cursed artifact?" Draco mused aloud.
"Eh, warmer than before, but not quite as warm. Still sorta comfy. Oh!" Sean jumped, nearly upsetting his precarious balance on Ron's head, which he managed to recover by digging his talon-ended fingers into Ron's scalp.
"What'd you do that for?" Ron yelped, swatting ineffectually at the air around the leprechaun. Sean was still staring dazedly off into the distance, though.
"Ron, I think something's wrong with him," Harry edged closer with his eyebrows frowning worriedly for him.
Sean suddenly shook his head into a blur for a second and refocused on his surroundings, "I ain't sayin' that!"
"Saying what?" Draco insisted, bringing his free hand down on the bed for emphasis.
"Dumblydore ga' me some cockamamie poem to gi' ye, but I ain't sayin' it!" Sean's face was crinkled like a dried up apple and he crossed his little arms over his chest with a humph, "It just is sayin' that ye'll have an hour to get back what they take, and ye'll hafta face yer darkest self, on'y more flowery wordin' and hippogriff shit mixed in."
Ron barked out a laugh at his phrasing but Harry sobered completely, "What will they take?"
Sean twitched, and adopted an over-exaggerated "proper" British accent, "...To recover what you most hold dear, you'll face the you inside you fear..."
Ron's strangled laughter was the only sound for a good minute as Draco and Harry attempted to digest this.
"So basically, we're just facing our fears to get back some object they think we treasure?" Harry summarized with an unreadable scowl on his face.
"I can't talk. I've burned ta ashes," Sean informed from his sprawled eagle position on Ron's head.
"That's a load of bunk," Harry crossed his arms, "How can they just take, say, a family heirloom without any permission from the family as a whole?"
"The Goblet's a contract, Harry; basically they can do whatever they want with us under the directives of the Tournament," Draco clenched and unclenched his free hand irritably.
"How is it so easy to enter someone into a contract like this? I mean, it probably wasn't even my signature!" Harry groaned, putting his hands (plus one of Draco's) over his face.
Draco looked away and told himself there was absolutely nothing wrong with noticing how soft someone's cheek was when the back of your hand was being pressed against it. It was just a simple, ordinary, everyday observation. Just a little mental note...
"Well, it'd be easy to tear your name off some returned homework or something," Ron voiced, causing Draco to jump mentally and scold himself for getting lost in thought, "But what I'd like to know is why this happened now?"
"Dumblydore thought a leprechaun was too obscure of a clue an' convinced the others to let him send out a less obscure poem," Sean spat in distaste, "See the egg linked all us leprechaun 'volunteers' to each other an' Dumblydore."
Harry frowned, dropping his hands and Draco's down to his lap, "Aren't you a voluntee-"
Draco cut him off, stumbling over his own words in order to do so, "Ah- I, er, yes. So, the fool's gold refers to the illusion of whatever we fear and the object we want back?"
"Er, yes?" Sean responded waveringly.
"There's more to it?" Harry suggested, eyes wide.
"Well, ye've mostly got it figured out, hafn't ye? So, le's just leave it at that..." Sean retreated warily to the back of Ron's skull.
"I can't lay down if you're back there," Ron reminded him. "And that reminds me, what did you tell the teachers?"
"I told them you had died of the dragonpox and needed to adjust to life as a ghost for a day or so before you came back to classes," Draco drawled, looking down at and straightening his tie one-handedly.
Ron changed like a chameleon to a brilliant scarlet, "What? Why would you-"
"Ron!" Harry grabbed his hand, "Relax, he didn't say anything like that. I just told the professors that you arrived at our room last night looking like death warmed over twice and needed to sleep 'cause of the harassment you were facing back at the Tower." Draco eyed where Ron and Harry's limbs were still attached calculatingly and shifted just enough so Harry had to let go or risk falling over.
"Oh, er, yeah." The crimson bloomed even brighter across his face as he realized he'd fallen for Draco's trick so easily. "When did I start believing Malfoy?"
"I'm just amazing like that," Draco dismissed.
Harry dug through his book bag as he spoke, "Well, I got your homework from the classes I have with you, but you're going to need to get the DADA homework yourself, sorry." Retrieving the parchment he was looking for he handed a small stack to the Weasley boy in front of him.
"Gee, thanks, Harry," Ron moaned, "I should get started..."
"It's not like it's due tomorrow!" Harry joked, "Procrastinate more!"
"Yeah..." Ron threw the papers behind him and Sean leaped down to begin the construction of his homework fort, "I guess I'll do it the morning it's due."