Since Easter is on Sunday here in the States, I thought I'd give you an extra update :) And it's a long one too! Chapter 22 will be updated on Wednesday like usual. Enjoy!

Chapter Twenty-One

"Edward's all moved in to his new place," Alice tells me. She's taken to coming over as much as possible since Rosalie left for California with Emmett and Jasper. I know she's lonely so I indulge her.

I'm lonely too.

Edward is the first and last thing on my mind. I miss talking to him and I know that Addie misses him as well. She's always cranky these days. My parents keep telling me that she's teething but I know the truth. She misses Edward. If I didn't get the courage to talk to him soon, we would both lose our minds.

"Are you ever going to talk to him?" she asks. She places Addie down into her bassinette before turning to look at me. I glance away from her. How do I answer that? How do I tell her that I'm ready to talk to him but that I can't? I couldn't handle it if he turned me away.

You did say some pretty awful things, Bella.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Horrible Bella Swan.

"Bella, you can't keep doing this to him. To yourself," she says. I glance up when she takes a seat beside me on the couch. "Please go talk to him. You're killing him."

"I've made such a mess of things, haven't I?" I whisper. "I'm going to go out there and beg for his forgiveness and he's going to laugh in my face."

"He will not! He may be a little mad but he won't ever stop loving you. You're it for him." I scoff at her and turn away. She stands from her position and crouches down in front of me. Her fingers play with the ends of my hair and she smiles when I finally look into her eyes. "What are you so afraid of?"

"Everything," I answer with a weak chuckle. "I'm afraid of what I feel… of what I've said… of who I am… or who I am becoming…" I take a deep breath and wipe at the tears that have started to fall. "But more than anything, I'm so afraid of never feeling half of what I feel when I'm with him."

"Then go to him, honey," Alice urges. "He goes on his lunch break around seven. Make him some meatloaf and potatoes… take him some of that cake you have in there… and ask for his forgiveness. Beg if you have to." She smiles at me and I start to feel a bit better. Ever since I've known her, she always had that way about her. Just a smile or a hug from Alice Cullen could put anyone at ease. "I don't think you will have to do much begging though. He still tells me how wonderful you are. He's completely broken hearted over what he's lost."

"So am I…"

"Then get your ass in that kitchen and cook your man some food!"

I laugh and stand rather abruptly, knocking Alice over on her ass. She doesn't seem to care. She's laughing too. I help her up then throw my arms around her in a tight hug. "I love you, Ali. I'm sorry for being a raging bitch and putting you in the middle of this whole mess."

"Aw, Bellsie," she sniffs. Is she crying? I pull away from her and look her over. She is! "You're my BFF. I would do anything for you. Now!" Alice claps her hands together and does this little jumping thing that she does when she's super excited. I can't help but laugh at her. "His favorite meal is meatloaf with mashed potatoes and I may have tried some of your chocolate cake. That mint chocolate chip frosting is soooo good, Bella! Take him a slice of that. Once that slice of heaven touches his lips, he will be yours forever."

"He should want to be with me for me, Al, not because of my cake," I tease.

Alice snorts and wiggles her eyebrows at me.

Yeah. I know what she's implying. Perv.

"My mama always told me that a way to a boy's heart is through his stomach," she says.

"Then what's keeping Jasper because you can't even boil water," I throw back at her as I turn towards the kitchen. A loud smack sounds through the house and I yelp loudly. I turn around and glare at Alice. She's grinning her typical crooked grin.

Like Edward.

"Get moving, Sweet Cheeks."

I roll my eyes and walk into the kitchen. I quickly glance around, thinking of what I need to make a nice meal for Edward. The cake was already done so that wouldn't be a big deal. So what next? Cut the onions first. I nod to myself and grab an onion out of the pantry then a knife out of a drawer. I get to cutting the onion into small pieces, smiling to myself.

This was it.

I was finally going to go talk to Edward. I would beg, cry, do whatever I could to get him to forgive me. If he didn't – which was a rather large possibility – then at least I could say that I tried. It would break my heart but I would deserve it. Trying was a great step for moving forward and I wanted to move forward with –

The pain shot through my palm, bringing me out of my thoughts of Edward. Alice came running into the kitchen just as I let out a loud "Shit! Fuck!" Cradling my hand to my chest, I reach for the nearest dish towel and wrap it around my hand. Alice is paler than usual and I instantly know why. My white dish towel is practically a bright red by now. I'm sure I need stitches.

"Well so much for meatloaf," I try to joke. I start breathing out of my nose. The scent of blood always bothered me and with the amount of it, I was beginning to grow light headed. "I don't think Edward would appreciate blood red onions." I go to move towards Alice but stumble instantly. I grab the nearest chair to steady myself but we both go down. Alice's arms reach out instinctively.

She missed and I hit my head against the refrigerator.

Holy shit did that hurt.

I groan and attempt to rub my head while keeping my cut hand cradled and wrapped against my chest. The baby starts crying and I move to get up but the room is still spinning.

"Stay right there, hun," she tells me. She's already moving towards the living room so I shut my eyes and try to calm my breathing. I feel like I'm going to throw up. The sound of the front door opening and closing has me opening up my eyes.

Big mistake.

The blood is already seeping out of the dish towel and down my arm.

Fuck me.

"Bella?!" my mother shrieks. "Oh my god, honey. Bella, baby, what happened?" I feel her cold hands on me and I can't help but think of how nice it feels against my warm skin. She starts brushing my damp hair from my face and I can't help but think that I don't want her to stop because it feels so good.

"Mama…" I sound pathetic. I can't help myself really. My hand feels like it's on fire from the dish towel sticking to the cut and my head is pounding. "It hurts, Mama…"

"She cut herself while dicing the onions," Alice explains. "Then she fell and hit her head. I was trying to help her but then the baby started crying."

"It's alright, Alice," Renee tells her. I feel her gently pull away at the towel and I hiss. "Sorry, baby. I just need a quick peak, alright?" I nod. I let her do as she wishes. She knows what she's doing. Before I came along, Renee used to be a nurse at the hospital. With two small children, she decided to keep her license renewed but stay at home. Now she works at the school three times a week. "You really did a number on yourself." I feel her closing the towel back up and push herself out of her crouched position. Her hands wrap themselves around my arms and she pulls me up off the floor. I wobble a little but she steadies me. "You're going to need stitches." I groan and rest myself back against the fridge. "Stop being a baby," she scolds but I know she isn't really angry with me. I can hear it in her voice. "You should have been paying attention."

"I thought I was," I grumble.

"Alice, can you take her?" Renee asks. "I'll stay with Addie."

"Sure, Mrs. Swan," Alice says.

"Oh, dear. How many times do I have to tell you to call me Renee?" she says, gently. "You know that I think of you as my own." I can practically see Alice beaming from ear to ear. "I'm parked behind you so just go ahead and take my car." I hear the jingle of her car keys and Addie's sweet little coo.

The smell of blood isn't as strong now so I get the courage to open my eyes. My arms and shirt are caked with blood but I have a new dish towel. I look at my mother.

"Changed it when you were willing yourself not to vomit," she tells me.

"Thanks, Mom." She kisses me on the forehead and Addie reaches out to pat my cheek. "Bye, baby." She coos at me in response before shoving her chapped little fist into her mouth.

Okay so maybe she was teething.

What did I know? I look like a crazed lunatic who just went on a killing spree.

"Come on, Bells," Alice grabs hold of my arm and leads me to the front door. I glance back at the kitchen where my mother still stands with Addie. She's busy making her wave bye bye at me. Addie just giggles.

"But the cake," I grumble.

"You'll make Edward some more cake," Alice replies. She grabs my coat and helps me slip it over the uninjured arm then drapes the other half lightly over my shoulder. She grabs both of our purses too. "Besides, your mom is right." She places me outside on the porch before closing the door behind her. "You need stitches, Bella. It's like you were carving a turkey."

"That bad huh?"

"You sliced part of your palm off." She grabs hold of me and walks me down the steps to my mom's car. Once I'm settled inside, she buckles me in. "It's still sitting inside on the counter."

"Ew! Gross!"

"Well, you shouldn't have been daydreaming about my brother!" And with that she slams the car door in my face.

Bitch.

"Is this really necessary, Al?" I ask once I'm seated in the waiting room of the ER. "I can just see any doctor."

Alice rolls her eyes at me and searches the busy waiting room. "Nonsense," she says with a dismissive wave of her hand. I want to bite those damn fingers off. "You're here. Edward's here. You might as well confess your undying love for him while you're here."

"Alice, stop it."

"I'll be right back. I'm going to go talk to Margie."

I don't even have time to register much of anything before Alice takes off to speak with Margie Tanner, the receptionist. Poor broad won't know what hit her.

"I need Doctor Cullen ASAP," she tells Margie.

I look over in their direction. Margie and Alice are staring each other down.

"He's seeing other patients right now," Margie tells Alice. "I'm afraid you'll have to wait."

"But my BFF is practically bleeding to death!"

"Alice, I'm fine," I snap at her.

She rolls her eyes and faces off with Margie once more. "Plus he's my brother and they're hopelessly in love with each other. Please just page him."

"I'm sorry but it will have to wait. Doctor Cullen is extremely busy with other patients right now."

Alice angrily slams her hands down on the counter and I jump from the sudden loud noise. "Page Doctor Cullen right now," she snarls, "Or I'm calling the other Doctor Cullen and telling him about your piss poor attitude."

"That's enough, Alice!" I hiss. "Stop being such a bitch." I smile. "I'm sorry, Margie. My little accident seems to have traumatized her." I hold up my covered hand and wave it around a little. It only causes me to hiss out in pain.

"Oh, Isabella!" Margie cries out. "I didn't realize you were the one injured. I'll page Doctor Cullen right away."

Alice let out this weird screeching noise as she stomped over to me. "Really?" she quietly hisses. "It couldn't have been that easy from the very fucking beginning?"

I laugh as she takes a seat next to me. "For crying out loud, Alice. I could have waited to be seen."

"No, you most certainly could not! You and Edward need to have this conversation then Bedward needs to happen and you two can go back to his place and bone like crazy."

My eyes widen and I quickly glance around the waiting area to see if anyone heard her. I breathe a sigh of relief. She seriously had no filter. "There won't be any boning," I hiss. "And stop trying to make Bedward happen! It isn't going to happen!"

"What isn't going to happen?"

I still in my spot and slowly turn to look behind me.

God did he look good.

I had never seen Edward in his scrubs before but…. Oh. Em. Gee. Did he look good. I wanted to lick him then do naughty, naughty things to him. Why did I stay away from for so long? More importantly, how could I cause so much pain to such a beautiful creature?

I could only hope that he would accept my apology and take me back.

Please take me back.

Don't make me beg.

Okay… I would beg if I absolutely had to.

"What's going on?" Edward's eyes dart back and forth from me to Alice then back again before landing on my bloody dish towel. "Bella, what happened?"

"Had a little accident," I answer. "Think you could fix me up, Doc?" I see him swallow before nodding and together, Alice and Edward help me up. "You coming, Al?"

Alice waves me on.

"No, no," she says. "You go ahead. I'll wait."

"If you're sure?" She nods rather vehemently. Now that I think about it she sort of resembles a Chihuahua on crack. "Okay then. Lead the way, Doc!"