Chapter 21: Softer Reason.
When she
woke up the next morning, Joanie was gone.
Skyla blinked
groggily, and felt around her disorientated. She remembered the
feeling of a body against hers and it hurt not having someone close.
The Winged Horse had not taken them far that evening. In her current
state she was a terrible judge of time, but by her guess they had
flown for about an hour before he finally set them down. In the dark,
she could not see where they were but it was sheltered from what felt
like a very cold wind. Joanie had already fallen asleep on the Horse
and, although she wasn't tired, Skyla had carefully put her down
where the Horse indicated and lay down beside her - partly for
warmth, party for comfort. It took her a very long time to fall
asleep and when sleep finally came, her dreams had been dark and
haunted.
She knew, deep inside her that she had lost Skyler again
and waking up without Joanie was terrifying. She was deeply worried
about the girl purely because worrying about Joanie was better than
worrying about herself.
Skyla got up and looked around her. She hadn't noticed it the night before but the Horse had led them into a cave of some sorts. Moving to the walls she gently ran her hand over the wall's surface, taking note of the crystals embedded in the wall. Shivering, she realized that the Horse wasn't around either.
She was completely alone.
Fighting panic, Skyla stumbled out of the cave, automatically checking to see if her glove was still on her hand. It was, but it disturbed her to see that there was blood on it. She touched the glove's palm as she stepped into the sunlight, then looked around quickly.
A flash of silver alerted her to the nearby presence of the Horse. He was grazing on a patch of grass not far from her at the edge of a small pool. The cave, she realized, was set in the bank of it and they seemed to be still quite deep in the mountain range. Stark rocks and boulders rose up around her. Unable to help herself, Skyla spread her wings and tried to fly but it was as useless an attempt as it would've been in the academy. She sighed and noticed that that Horse was staring at her.
Skyla
smiled politely and inclined her head in respect before she
approached him. He puzzled her, perhaps even frightened her. She
sensed an immense power in him, yet he bowed to her and seemed to
expect nothing in return. It was because of that that Skyla, when she
was close to him, bowed down carefully.
"My Lord."
The Horse
snorted and trotted over to touch her lightly on the shoulder in
permission to rise. "My Queen," he said amused and bowed down to
her when she stood up. He did not wait for her permission to rise
though and looked up, his eyes expectant.
"How are you
feeling?"
Skyla held
up her hand in defeat and shook her head. "Disorientated and
confused," she admitted. "Please, can you tell me where my
daughter is?"
The Horse nodded and tossed his head in the
direction of the pool, sure enough – when Skyla had a second look
she realized that Joanie was sitting on the opposite bank. Taking a
deep breath of relief Skyla closed her eyes in silent prayer then
looked back to the Horse. He was staring across the waters with a
thoughtful expression in his clear eyes she wasn't sure she liked.
Biting her lip she once again inclined her head and set of towards
the young Sky Dancer. She had not taken two steps when his clear
voice called her back.
"Skyla Zavere."
She stopped
despite herself and turned around to look at him. The Horse stepped
forward, his expression unreadable.
"Your daughter will tell
you of her journey," he said quietly. "But, I should tell you of
the reason first."
Relief
brushed over the maelstrom of emotions she was feeling as she nodded
and walked back to the mythological being. He led her over to a flat
rock where she sat down. He too sank down into the grass so that she
did not have to look up at him.
"I did not think much of your
daughter when I first saw her," he began quietly. "She was
desperate, arrogant. She allowed her emotions to dictate her actions
rather than clear thought. It was understandable under the
circumstances. Two days before you had disappeared before her eyes,
brought here to the Crystal Mountains by a curse as old as this land
itself."
Skyla frowned and stroked her Skyswirlstone. "A
crystal," she said frowning slightly. "One… About the size of…
A child's head? That carried it?"
The Horse nodded solemnly. "You remember?"
She nodded
slowly and frowned across the waters where Joanie was sitting.
"Vaguely," she said carefully. "I remember… a party." She
frowned deeper. "A celebration of my coronation if I'm correct."
The Horse nodded, following her gaze to her daughter. "Your
five year anniversary," he said. "The stone had been sent by your
brother-in-law…"
"Skyclone…" Skyla murmured, her eyes
narrowing. "If it comes from this realm, how did he come by it?"
The Horse sighed softly, but he seemed pleased with her question. "Your daughter never considered that," he said. "Never bothered to ask." He flicked his tail in a very animal like gesture then breathed deeply and looked at her. "I sent it to him. With very clear instructions on how it works. Though, admittedly he thought that it would kill you."
Skyla's
reaction was immediate, with a soft cry of shock she stood up and
almost pointed her Skyswirlstone at the beast but his cool steady
eyes stopped her.
"Why?" she queried appalled. "Joanie at
least seem to think that you can be trusted!"
The Horse sighed and tossed his mane. "Do you think that any of us with power can be trusted?" he said solemnly. "Can you?"
She sat down slowly but didn't dare take her eyes from his. "I try to be trustworthy," she said. "I try to be the best person I can be."
The Horse
seemed to smile at her and glanced over to where Joanie was sitting.
"You have certainly seemed to make an impression on this young
girl," he said quietly. Skyla didn't say anything, nor took his
gaze from him. "Don't touch my daughter if you intend to harm
her," she said softly, dangerously. "I will not have it. I
won't."
The Horse flicked his tail again, his clear eyes resting on hers. "But, I already have Skyla Zavere," he said softly. "I touched your daughter the day you gave her the right of flight." When the woman didn't comprehend what he was saying he continued solemnly. "Joanie's Silver Feather comes from me. Years ago I gave it to a man who had travelled to this realm from yours. Your Master Anwar I believe." He twitched his ears in what appeared to be irritation. "I felt as if I had no choice at the time, as if history had already been written." He flicked his tail again. "When I sensed your daughter's presence holding the feather I had to… meet her. Feel her worth. I could not just show up in your realm so I decided to bring her to mine. A test first to see if she'll come, a challenge when she did."
Skyla's heart was beating a frantic taboo in her chest. She shivered and tried to still her unease. She tried to find the right words but couldn't. Eventually, she clutched her hand over her chest and looked across the waters again.
"What did you find?" she breathed. "In your madness, what did you find?"
The clear
eyes drew hers back to his and Skyla could feel the Horse smiling.
"That she is a force in herself," he said. "And you could
not have given the power of my Silver Feather to a better candidate…"
&
The girl
was still staring into the pool.
Skyla looked at her, remembering
the night she had told her that she intended to give her a home at
the Academy. The girl had begged her not to give her hope, as if it
was some strange disease which she would never survive. In a way, she
had not. The Joanie-Ellen she had spoken with that evening and the
girl she saw before her now were two completely different people. The
change in the girl has been drastic over the past few months.
And, she had changed now.
Skyla
sighed softly and went to sit down next to her. Joanie looked up
briefly, her dark eyes lost in thought. None the less, the relief of
seeing her was almost palatable. Unsure of how she should act,
remembering the whispered 'Mother' on Joanie's lips,
Skyla carefully put her arm around the girl's shoulders.
"Are
you alright?" she asked softly. "Good morning."
Joanie pulled her eyes away from her face and sighed softly, smiling weakly. "I think it's afternoon," she said quietly. "But, it's hard to judge time here. Are you… alright?"
Skyla
smiled gently, ruffling the young girl's hair. "I asked first."
Joanie flinched, but not at her touch. "I'm… good," she
said then suddenly, almost frantically. "You? Are you
alright?"
Skyla nodded, not speaking but it seemed enough for
Joanie. The young Sky Dancer breathed a sigh of relief and gingerly
touched her side. Skyla noticed with a touch of dismay that there was
some blood on the unknown shirt that she was wearing but she decided
not to comment on it. Not yet. She sighed and looked out across the
dark pool until she felt her adopted daughter stir.
"What were
you two talking about?"
Skyla involuntarily glanced at the Winged Horse who had stared grazing again. "You," she said quietly. "And me." She took a steadying breath. "Joanie, the horse told me that… You've had a difficult journey here." When the girl didn't make any comment she carried on quietly. "And… And to rescue me, you had to see…" Joanie shifted but didn't look at her. "Some of my memories."
The young girl's back stiffened and, maybe unconsciously, she moved away from her.
"It's
alright," she said monotonously but Skyla wasn't convinced. She
sighed softly and sensing that Joanie didn't want to be near her
took her arm from the girl's shoulder and waited quietly.
"I
can… deal with most of it," Joanie carried on softly. "Firstly,
they weren't… You didn't share them willingly, I had no right
to them. It's… An invasion of privacy." She sniffed and
shrugged. "And, they didn't affect me. Or shouldn't have."
She rubbed her brow and looked at the woman pleadingly. "You said
yourself, you're not perfect."
Skyla nodded quietly, mentally wondering when Joanie had heard her say that. "And," she queried softly, "are you alright with that?"
Joanie
didn't look at her immediately as she glared at the water. She
seemed to want to nod then rather changed her mind. She took her hand
from where it had been pressing against her side and made a vague
motion.
"The Tinker deserved what he got," she said softly.
"I think in the grand scheme of things he plays his own game. He
always has I think. And, they were trying to force you…" Joanie
bit her lip when Skyla frowned at her puzzled. "I've been
thinking about it all morning," she said quietly then took a deep
breath. "There were… Three memories. One of… The day you…
Faolin was there. It was the first day that you had been left on your
own I presume after your husband died."
Skyla's brow darkened as she closed her eyes. "I… remember," she said with regret. "I did… apologize. I'm sorry you had to see that Joanie."
The young girl sighed and made a dismissive gesture. "Now you know I know," she said quietly. "And, it… I've been thinking about it. It doesn't affect us. Or me. If it should've affected anybody, it was Faolin. You treated her… She didn't deserve that mo… Dame Skyla. She didn't. She loves you terribly, I think. But, she stayed on and must've forgiven you for it so…" Joanie sighed, a sound of release. "So who am I to judge you?"
Skyla
nodded relieved, watching the young girl as she licked her lips. "And
the Tinker?" she queried puzzled.
Joanie's frown intensified.
"Same day," she said softly. "You met him in your husband's
office." She sighed and ticked at a stone with her heel. "The way
I figure, he kept you alive those past few days after Skyler… You
must've been pretty angry at them. At the world. I… can
understand that. People forcing you to do what you don't want to,
what you should not have to do…" Her dark eyes were older than
Skyla remembered when they touched Skyla's glove. "I can
understand that you were angry with him even if he was trying to help
you."
Skyla shifted uncomfortably and turned so that she could look at Joanie with more ease. "But?" she queried.
Joanie sniffed and closed her eyes. "But the woman mom," she said softly – the word sliding off of her tongue in a bitter sweet way. "The… the magician. Oriana the sorceress." She seemed to check her words, cut them. "I… she didn't appear to be well. She couldn't have been. She was an innocent, an outside player in this… I saw…" she opened her eyes and allowed them to drift up to Skyla's face. "Did you… Did you kill her?"
Skyla
closed her eyes and touched her face. Nobody had known where she had
gone that day except the Tinker and he never knew the details. It had
been…
"I wanted to," she replied quietly. "In that
moment, I wanted to."
Joanie closed her eyes, her free hand
travelling to her face as if she wanted to close her ears.
"But,"
Skyla continued quickly. "I didn't. Joanie-Ellen, I have never
taken a life. I… She saved me that day. By allowing me to…" She
closed her eyes. "I didn't kill her my pet, I didn't."
Joanie's
relief was almost visible in the chilly air. She rocked forward with
relief, then without warning quickly moved so that she could be close
to Skyla again.
"I'm sorry for doubting you," she
whispered, her voice thick. "I'm so sorry for doubting you."
Skyla laughed softly, giddy with relief herself. "You had every
right," she whispered softly and touched the young girl's head.
"I almost did."
Joanie
seemed to move into her touch. "What happened?" she asked puzzled
causing a bitter edge to enter Skyla's laugh.
"I missed,"
the queen said softly, looking at her Skyswirlstone. "I just
missed."
Joanie choked a laugh of pure shock. "Bummer," she managed.
Skyla laughed and shook her head. "No," she said. "No, a gift…" She let her hand travel down to the youngster's shoulder and carefully drew her closer. "I was faced with the darkest side of myself that day, that second. And, she allowed me to see it. After… I realized what I had done or what I had almost done, I had a choice. I could allow my grief to swallow me, to drive me as mad as the woman in front of me, or I could live above it, beyond it." She smiled slightly, pleased when Joanie seemed to bury herself in her side. "I chose the latter."
The girl's breathing was very deep, as if she was fighting tears. Skyla held her tenderly, remembering with renewed joy that Joanie had called her 'mother'.
"What did she mean?" the girl queried when she got her emotions under control. "That you… Married a dead man." The question sounded strange, as if Joanie already knew the answer.
Skyla sighed and shrugged. "I never found out," she said quietly. "Oriana kept her secrets close. After we spoke, and I had time to think about it, I realized that she had been right though. Skyler had always loved me with a painfully fierce intensity as if… as if every moment could be his last. It made me a little insecure at times because I felt as if he was constantly planning to leave me." She sighed and shrugged, her gaze painful. "Perhaps he had had a premonition of what was to be. I will never know."
She was
aware that Joanie had buried her face against her chest. "I'm
sorry," the young girl whispered softly, causing Skyla to laugh.
"You're not to blame," she said softly. "Life is about
unanswered questions." She looked up to the sky and sighed. "I
should take you to meet Oriana one day. We… don't get on well,
but I have tried to make an effort, if only in the memory of my
husband." She smiled slightly. "I certainly try to make sure that
she always has jam at her disposal. I haven't gone to her in
months, but the Tinker still goes quite often to my knowledge."
When she felt Joanie stiffen she made a quick soothing sound. "She's
not always as mad as she was… That day."
Joanie nodded quietly but said nothing.
&
To Be Continued…
AN: In
the past 6 weeks, I have not slept in the same bed for more than 8
days. I think it's starting to affect the way I think, lol, because
I had an unnaturally hard time producing this chapter. None the less,
here's another for your enjoyment! I'm hoping to finish this
story before summer's end. Though mind, that's the general
summer. According to Scotland weather summer's already but a
memory. (If it ever truly came). I have put another Sky Dancers vid
on you tube (some time ago). It's the Skyler vs. Skyler one which I
wrote a filler for. Hope you enjoy. Have a great day! Alyss
-;--
