From Jacob:

Hey Bella. Wink.

From Bella:

You actually just texted wink?

From Edward:

That's sad.

From Emmett:

THE ACCUSED SHALL NOT TALK TO THE WITNESSES!

From Edward:

And i suppose i'm not allowed to eat cheese either?

From Emmett:

You've read the rulebook?

From Edward:

And i also suppose that the accused cannot read the rulebook as well as not being able to read Wind in the Willows?

From Emmett:

You have read it! Alice!

From Alice:

Yes high Priest Emmett?

From Emmett:

Double security around the rulebook!

From Alice:

Which particular one would that be?

From Emmett:

We have more than one?

From Rosalie:

We have thirty three, not including the language translations.

From Edward:

You have copies of your random caseist rulebooks in different languages?

From Emmett:

THE ACCUSED MUST NOT CRITISIZE THE INNER WORKINGS OF THE ANCIENT RELIGION OF PILLOWCASE!

From Rosalie:

What he texted!

From Alice:

Yeah!

From Bella:

So there!

From Alice:

Why have i suddenly got the urge to put exclamation marks at the end of every sentence!

From Jasper:

I don't know!

From Alice:

Shut up!

From Jasper:

And why would i do that!

From Alice:

Because i'm your wife!

From Jasper:

I know you are! What was i thinking!

From Alice:

Do you want me to hit you!

From Jasper:

Not really!

From Alice:

Well shut up!

From Jasper:

Yes dear!

From Emmett:

Err O.K. That was wierd.

From Bella:

Can we like, get on with this!

From Edward:

I'm getting pins and needles in a place people should not get pins and needles!

From Bella:

We did not want to know that!

From Edward:

Oh good! I told you anyway!

From Bella:

I know you did! That's why i've taken you to court!

From Edward:

Wait...i thought i was on trial for sarcasticness?

From Bella:

Oh yeah.

From Alice:

Actually, your on trial for quite a few things.

From Edward:

Err, why?

From Rosalie:

People added onto the list as we went along.

From Edward:

You made a list?

From Alice:

Yes.

From Edward:

Oh no.

From Bella:

Some people might take offense at that you know.

From Rosalie:

They might even think that you are dissing there list.

From Alice:

Your not dissing my list, are you? Little breakable Eddie boy?

From Edward:

No.

From Alice:

Are you sure? Little extremely breakable Eddie boy?

From Edward:

No, i've revised that whole dissing thing. Really.

From Alice:

Well good. Because we know who got the prize for the best list making don't we?

From Edward:

Err, enlighten me.

From Alice:

IT WAS ME YOU IDIOT!

From Rosalie:

No it wasn't!

From Alice:

Was to!

From Rosalie:

As i recall, it was actually the award for the most amazing waste of paper.

From Alice:

Well...it's the same thing.

From Jacob:

Errr, can i just come into this conversation here?

From Alice:

No.

From Jacob:

Aww, come on! I'm the first witness and i've only said a few lines!

From Edward:

At least you got an award.

From Alice:

Your both kind of steering this conversation away from the subject here.

From Rosalie:

And it's annoying.

From Edward:

Fine, i'll just go and sulk in the corner then.

From Emmett:

THE ACCUSED CANNOT SULK IN CORNERS!

From Edward:

Is there anything the accused can do?

From Emmett:

Errr, lets see. Alice!

From Alice:

Yes?

From Emmett:

The list please!

From Edward:

What, are you the list keeper or something?

From Alice:

You got a problem with that?

From Edward:

No, not a single problem.

From Emmett:

Right, the list reads: The accused can do the following...make kiwi ice cream while the trial is commencing.

From Jasper:

KIWI ICE CREAM! WHERE!?!

From Edward:

I'm just not going to say anything.

From Bella:

There's nothing you can really say to that, is there?

From Alice:

Oh, i could probably think of something.

From Emmett:

We'll do divorce rights later, right now were focusing on the problem at hand.

From Edward:

Yeah!

From Alice:

Huh.

From Emmett:

Look, just go and make a list.

From Alice:

Of what?

From Emmett:

Of the different types of cheese in the fridge.

From Alice:

We don't have any cheese in the fridge.

From Emmett:

Do you have to be so perdantic?

From Alice:

Yes.

From Jasper:

Huh, i should know.

From Emmett:

I told you, i haven't had time to compile divorce rights yet!

From Alice:

Well, get right on it then!

From Emmett:

I AM CURRENTLY DOING SOMETHING ELSE!

From Alice:

I KNOW YOU ARE!

From Emmett:

Oh, just go and list the different types of penguin in the back garden or something.

From Alice:

Penguins are not found in vampires back gardens.

From Emmett:

Oh, so your an ornithologist now?

From Rosalie:

No, she's not! I'm the ornithologist around here! Everybody knows that!

From Edward:

Excuse me, but can we get on?

From Emmett:

There's nothing else on the list really.

From Edward:

Nothing?

From Emmett:

Well, apart from being allowed to eat tortoises in the court room.

From Bella:

WHAT HAS A TORTOISE EVER DONE TO YOU!?!

From Emmett:

You weren't there at London Zoo!

From Rosalie:

No, but i was.

From Emmett:

You wouldn't...

From Rosalie:

Oh, i would.

From Emmett:

But why?

From Rosalie:

An ornithologist will do everything for their research.

From Emmett:

Huh?

From Rosalie:

NOT AGAIN!

From Bella:

THE HUH DISEASE!

From Rosalie:

RUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNNNNNN!!!!!!