Okay...first off I am so sorry for the lack of updates, but it has been a work frenzy recently. Luckily things have calmed down in the run-up to Christmas day and I am hoping to post another chapter within the next few days. I hope you are still enjoying this fic and that it is not too sluggish for you. I have to say, thank you so much to you fabulous people who reviewed, and I wish you all a merry christmas. Please review again xxx
Following a rather unspectacular breakfast of toast and marmite, apparently the only thing Ruth was able to face after her sickness that morning, Harry had informed her that he would wash up whilst she changed in to something for work. Knowing full well she would need her privacy for something like that, he hid downstairs and washed up the two plates, whilst wrinkling his nose at the horrific smell of marmite. It was extremely odd, he thought, that with the regards to the fact that he detested marmite, he actually had some lying around in his kitchen cupboard. He rather suspected it was left over from one of the times the inquiry had tasked a man to follow his every move; thus Harry had needed an escape route and the only one available had been in a small convenience store at the end of the street. He must have picked up the first items he saw during his cover and then slipped out of the back entrance. He smirked unashamedly at the thought of the expression of that young man, who must have waited for at least thirty minutes before following him inside the shop, only the find that Harry had mysteriously vanished.
Harry finished off scrubbing away at the last, now dry plate, flipping the tea towel casually over his shoulder whilst he carefully slipped both the plates back into the cupboard. It was then he became aware of the clatter of footsteps on the wooden stairs; the pace was slow and most likely still stiff and painful, but nevertheless, Harry was proud of her independence, especially regarding the state she had been in since the attack. He removed the damp tea towel from his shoulder and tossed it onto the rack next to the cupboard, just in time to see Ruth emerge through the kitchen door. She wore a long-sleeved, high-neck, navy blue top, accompanied by a warm-looking cardigan of a similar colour. Harry could not help but notice that she was not wearing a skirt which was her usual work attire; instead she wore a pair of plain black trousers, and underneath them, flat heeled boots. Ruth's face was the picture of anxiety, and her fingers were plucking at the edge of her cardigan. Harry again questioned whether or not she was ready to be going back to work, but he reasoned it was better to keep an eye on her at the grid, than risk anything like what happened yesterday. She was apparently very aware of Harry staring unashamedly at her, and she bowed her head in nervousness, also seemingly conscious of the fact that she was wearing clothes that covered practically every inch of her body. She opened her mouth to say something but then closed it after a moment of hesitation, and Harry had the distinct impression she wanted to ask him if she looked alright. He looked her up and down before saying very honestly and very quietly:
"You look beautiful Ruth." Her eyes grew wide and a blush tinted her pale skin, as her gaze shot up to meet his and he continued. "You always do."
She stood there for a few moments, her mouth opening and closing rapidly, whilst her blush deepened to such an extent she had gone bright red. Slightly concerned, Harry moved closer to her, "What's wrong? Is everything alright?"
Ruth looked as if she wanted to say something else rather than the concise answer she provided, "I…I'm fine." Her eyes descended to the kitchen tiles again, and the resumption of her fingers fidgeting with her cardigan brought Harry into awareness that everything was not 'fine'. He reached forward a hand to still her fiddling one, and wrapped his fingers around hers, forcing her gaze to retreat back up to his.
"Ruth," he said sternly, in a tone that brooked no argument. "What is it?"
"N…nothing…it's really…nothing." As she caught sight of his concerned expression, she added hastily. "There's nothing wrong…really…there's nothing that's upset me."
Harry frowned confusedly, "Then what's the matter?"
"Really," Ruth said desperately, her eyes now beseeching him not to pursue the subject any further. "Nothing's the matter. Just…please leave it…you'll think I'm silly, and I'll become embarrassed again and…I've already had quite enough of that recently."
Harry wanted to do as she said, for he could see that if he pursed the subject for much longer, searching for an answer like a dog with a bone, she might become distressed again, and any progress they had made would be destroyed. Yet, he could not stop his shameful curiosity, "Ruth, you've hardly embarrassed yourself in front of me," at her sceptical look he added. "Really you haven't. And if you have then…then I haven't noticed. I'm a man aren't I…aren't we supposed to be generally ignorant and unobservant about these things?"
He watched as another slight, heart-stopping smile appeared at the corner of her mouth. She considered his statement for a moment, still staring at the floor before saying quietly, "But you're not most men. You're a spook…it's your job to be observant."
Harry smiled at her slight jest before pursuing his question, "Ruth, what's the matter?"
Ruth sighed, now apparently very aware that he was not going to drop the subject. He could almost see the little cogs in her brain forming the argument that this was another aspect of his job that he was good at – interrogation. He felt her hand twitch a little in his gasp as if wanting to resume plucking at the cardigan but he held it still and tight.
"No one…"she began very slowly, and hesitantly. She closed her mouth and shrugged her shoulders in an attempt at giving up, but Harry squeezed her hand gently to encourage her to continue. "No one…I mean…I've never…" She took a deep breath in and released it back out again before saying virtually incoherently, "No one's…no one's ever told me I…look beautiful."
As soon as the words left her lips, her head shot up to meet his eyes, as if daring him to laugh. He did not laugh but she caught sight of the wide grin on his face, and she made to pull away from him. "See…I told you that you would think I was silly."
Harry held fast to her hand before bringing his other hand up so that he had both hands clasped around her small ones. "No I don't think it is silly." He said insistently.
"You're laughing." She mumbled self-consciously, using her other hand to wrap her cardigan protectively around herself.
"No I'm not, I'm smiling." Harry said firmly, removing one hand to grasp her other one. At her doubtful expression he continued, "I'm smiling because right now you're more beautiful than ever."
Ruth blushed even more, going beetroot, and Harry thought she looked adorable, although he could not help but feel curious about her previous past with men, regarding her confession just now, and the tearful statement she had made about ex-lovers whilst they had been arguing months ago. Sensing now was really not the time to ask, he checked the clock above kitchen cupboards and saw that it was almost seven o'clock.
"We'd better get going." Harry said heavily, inwardly concerned at Ruth suddenly tensing at his words. Regardless of what she said, he could tell that she was absolutely petrified at returning to the job that got her attacked in the first place, yet Harry was certain that he was not going to let anything like that happen to her again. "You'll be alright." He assured her.
"I…I don't think I can do this Harry." She said suddenly, eyes wide and vulnerable.
"Do you want to stay here?" he asked her hopefully, although ready to accept any decision she made at this point.
She considered this for a moment before shaking her head, somewhat uncertainly, "N…no." She then took a deep breath and said a little more confidently. "No I've got to…I can't stay here feeling sorry for myself…that's not how it works in this job is it?" Harry did not reply, and despite the uncomfortable feeling he might have told her that at some point over the years, he desperately wished it was not so. He wished she could have had a normal life where she could have been happily married with children, and no complications by now…and have the right to grieve in whatever way she chose. Of course this was not so.
"Are you sure?" he asked her firmly.
Ruth nodded which much more confidence. "Y…yes."
"Right," he said, also nodding, before ushering her through to the hall towards the coat rack, and shrugging into his own coat. "Let's go."
From the moment they had entered Thames House, he had sensed Ruth's apprehension from next to him. He was heavily aware that the vast majority of workers flocking around the various corridors and departments, were male, some of them travelled in droves, dressed in black, carrying briefcases and laughing loudly with each other. As Ruth caught sight of one of these particular groups she froze entirely, noticeably gritting her teeth to stop herself from shaking and giving the game away at just how frightened she actually was. Realising that the last thing she would want at that moment would be some sort of physical contact, Harry searched for another method of reassuring her. His mind filled with relief as he spotted John Bland from Section C at the centre of the group, and called out in a bid to show Ruth that the men were not going to do her any harm. "Morning John."
John looked up mid-conversation with the younger man on his left, and he smiled in recognition, if not a little in surprise, "Morning Harry," he said pleasantly, nodding politely at Ruth. "How's the Russian treaty going?"
"Appallingly," Harry responded honestly. Although he had never really taken the time to get to know men from other departments, he had always considered John Bland to be a fairly pleasant and mature fellow.
"So I've heard." John admitted smiling, before nodding that he had to re-join his colleagues who had continued up the corridor without him. "Well, good luck with it."
"Thanks." Harry said, sensing Ruth move in a more relaxed posture from her spot, and he knew he meant his gratefulness in more ways than one. He looked down at her and saw that her jaw was set firmly, as if she was purposely gritting her teeth to prevent herself from crying. At long last, the pair of them reached the entrance pods to the grid, and Harry patiently waited yet again for Ruth to prepare herself, as she took a few good, long deep breaths, and straightened her shoulders in brilliant defiance. She nodded once to Harry and they both neared the automatic doors, feeling them skim open, releasing warm, stuffy air against their faces. Harry watched her raise her gaze from the floor and stare agonisingly slowly round the grid; a building which she was so used to, but in contrast now seemed so different. He followed her gaze around the room, from her lingering look through the panels of his office, past the kitchenette and finally landing on three hard-working young operatives. Calum was sitting with his back to the pods, staring with his undivided attention at his computer, which was running some kind of recognition system, although from so far away, they could not quite tell what it was. Erin was alternating her attentions between both Calum and Dimitri, with her usually neat, immaculate hair beginning to frizz slightly in exhaustion. Dimitri looked the worst, as he was typing away feverishly on his computer, with his eyes narrowed, as though he was only just managing to keep them open. Harry noted that Ruth's gaze shifted automatically to Tariq's empty desk, and he saw her eyes widen noticeably as she took in the fact that no one had yet had the time to clear his desk. The variety of Styrofoam coffee cups were still standing resolutely in the same row that they had the night he had died, as was the newspaper which he had brought in with him that morning.
"Ruth!" a familiar voice suddenly squawked, causing Ruth to automatically jump and stare around alertly. Erin, it seemed had turned round to return to Calum's side and noticed both Ruth and Harry standing hesitantly at the edge of the grid. Upon analysing the older woman's face closely, Erin decided to ignore just how exhausted and ill she looked, and instead focused upon the joyous fact that she was still alive. Having not seen Ruth at all since her ordeal, she had not really had an idea as to the extent of the damage, yet she could now assess it quite easily from the mottled bruising on the older woman's face and neck. Slowly her eyes drifted down to Ruth's stomach, unable to help herself, since overhearing about her predicament through Harry's interrogation of Willard. She did not fail to notice that Ruth had resorted to fiddling with her hands nervously, and Erin hurriedly looked away in case her stare was making the other woman uncomfortable. She felt Dimitri shift from beside her, and Calum also turned around quickly upon hearing the name. In a bid to cover her embarrassment, she continued: "Ruth, Harry…you're back."
"Not happy to see us then?" Harry questioned, indicating with his eyes to keep the conversation light, in a bid to prevent Ruth becoming even more distressed, as at that moment, she had the distinct expression that she simply wanted a hole to open up and swallow her into the ground.
"Of course we are." Dimitri said quickly, shaking himself out of his state of shock, and sliding himself out of his chair to march across the grid towards them; Erin and Calum followed suite. Yet he could not help the images that harassed his mind as his eyes settled more closely on Ruth and the true extent of her injuries; images of her lying bleeding on the floor, of the pile of clothing lying tauntingly by the kitchen door, and Harry cradling the woman he loved whilst she tried to pull away. However, Dimitri forced on his best spook face, and tugged it into a welcoming smile: "How are…things?" he finished awkwardly. He had automatically started towards Ruth with his arms outstretched in the form of a hug, yet as if realising what he was doing, he suddenly lowered his left so that only his right was remaining. To add to the tension of the situation, he found himself wondering what to do with his available hand and he hovered somewhere between shaking her hand and clasping her shoulder, eventually giving her shoulder a brief pat. Ruth looked up at him and provided him with a brief, grateful smile, before she avoided his gaze, suddenly realising just how hard a task this was actually going to be, especially since Harry had told her Dimitri had been there when she had been found.
"Ruth," Erin said hesitantly, yet not unkindly. "We weren't expecting you back so soon. We thought you wouldn't be feeling up-"
"I'm fine Erin." The other woman cut in with as much firmness as she could muster. Only her still constantly fidgeting hands betrayed her true feelings. "Really I am. And all this," she said indicating the grid as a whole. "Doesn't stop just because I was…." She trailed off, sucking in a deep breath to calm herself at the sudden reel of images filling her mind. "I've got to come back and do my job."
Erin glanced helplessly at Harry, unable to find the words to tell Ruth to her face that she surely was not ready to return to work just yet. Despite Harry's defiant expression, she could tell his heart was not really in it, and wanted Ruth to rest and take time off work just as much as she did. For an instant she pondered just how a truly terrifying man such as Harry Pearce – a man who had killed terrorists with his bare hands – could have his heart melted by one single woman, to such an extent that he would obey almost her every command.
"Anyway," Ruth continued. "I expect there's a great mound of paperwork waiting for me on my desk is there…?" Her voice trailed off once again as her eyes rested on her own desk, which in fact, had never looked tidier. Even the stray sheets of paper that had been littered across the surface had been tidied up and carried off somewhere. Ruth turned back to face Erin who simply bit her lip nervously, "I've been getting a temporary analyst up here for a couple of hours each day to do it. I would have thought that work would be the last thing you need right now. So to make it easier I-"
"-Replaced me." Ruth finished quietly, her head craning round to look bitterly at her now tidy desk. Unable to help herself, she automatically balled her fists in anger, and had to clench her teeth tightly in her mouth to stop herself from raging out loud. Once again that helpless anger seemed to have arisen from nowhere. Regardless of the fact that she knew her colleagues were only trying to help, she could not help but feel frustrated that they simply did not understand what she needed; she needed to work…she needed to work to keep her mind off other things. If her mind was left to its own devices she knew what she would remember once again, and she had taken just about enough of it in her nightmares. If she could help it, she was not about to relive that night in her conscious thought as well.
Not only Erin's eyes had widened at Ruth's finishing statement; Dimitri and Calum were both looking completely alarmed as well, and Harry was quite clearly furious, having not been informed of this temporary change of staffing. "No…no Ruth…"Erin said quickly. "Not at all. We just got some work out of the way for you so that you would have time to rest."
"I don't know why everyone thinks I have this insatiable need to rest all day long." Ruth said quietly, yet the anger and bitterness in her voice could be easily detected. "I wasn't gravely injured, and I don't need 'recovery time'." She insisted in frustration. "All I need is for my life to get back to normal. Right now, we need to focus on catching Tariq's killer and who tried to kill Elena to stop this Russian agreement going ahead."
Despite the normal buzz of the grid, the corner in which the five colleagues stood was deadly quiet for a minute. During this time Calum's eyes whizzed nervously between the three key players in the game- Harry, Ruth and Erin. The two women looked all set to battle their argument to the end, and Dimitri stood, still awkwardly a few inches away from Ruth, his face portraying the same sadness that Harry's was. As both women's eyes locked once more, Erin sighed in defeat, and shrugged in final response. "Fine." She said reluctantly. She was about to open her mouth yet again when a plain young woman, usually seen conversing with the man Calum fondly deemed as 'the idiot who makes the tea', approached Erin tentatively and whispered something inaudibly in her ear.
Erin let out a small sad breath, somewhere between a sigh and a groan, before nodding her thanks to the young woman, and watched her walk away. After a second she let out a second sigh, and turned around to the direction of her own desk. "Great that's all we need. Apparently, the Home Secretary is most displeased with our progress on the Russian situation and is heading here of all places to give us a telling off."
"Since when did the Home Secretary of this country ever do anything personally. More to the point, since when did he ever venture out of his cosy little Whitehall Office?" Calum interjected bitterly, shoving his hands deeply into his pockets in venture of something to do with them, well aware that he was the only one who had not yet greeted Ruth.
"Since Harry told him he would do something about the hit on Elena Gavrik, and he hasn't." Erin said pointedly, not meaning to sound as vicious as she did, and softening her voice just a touch with an added apologetic expression in Harry's direction. "I'd better see what we have got for him so we don't all lose our jobs."
Upon hearing that Harry had been letting the situation slide; Ruth looked concernedly up at him, and for the first time since her attack, noticed just how tired he actually looked. Having been so absorbed in the aftermath of the attack, she had not really registered the fact that he must have had very little sleep since taking her to hospital that night. In fact, she reasoned, he had probably salvaged little more sleep than she had managed, and her heart broke for him. He had been so intent on looking after her, that he had been ignoring his job, and now he was going to get a telling off from the Home Secretary. She began to panic slightly at the thought of him losing his job permanently this time, again, down to her.
"Oh God, I'm so sorry Harry." She whispered so that only he could hear. "I've been getting in the way of everything. I've been stopping you from doing your job-"
"You've done no such thing." Harry whispered back firmly. "All I've done is put my priorities in order. The right order this time."
Despite the small blush that arose in her cheeks at his words she pressed on, "But you've risked your job twice for me now Harry, they're not going to let that slide."
"They're not going to let it slide when they find out you're pregnant anyway." Harry responded, this time not noticing that Ruth winced at the matter-of-fact way in which he said the statement. She mistook his tone for bitterness and immediately began to twist her hands together anxiously. "It won't make a difference." He added.
"Di," Erin added to Dimitri, and Harry wondered just when his officer had become 'Di'. "Brief Ruth on what we've been doing."
Dimitri looked as if he would really rather not, clearly of the same impression that Ruth should still not be on the grid, yet he nodded and did his best to smile at her. "Right." He said kindly, noting that Ruth was still unable to quite meet his gaze. "We got into your desk drawer and we found the information stick - Calum's been doing his best to find out what's on it, but it's been encrypted with so many codes it's taking ages to actually break into them."
Ruth could not help but smile slightly at the fond memories of Tariq typing happily away on his computer, never quite satisfied without a puzzle, "That sounds like Tariq." She said quietly.
From next to her, Harry smiled; he too being unable to help it for her smile was positively infectious. Dimitri was also overjoyed to see her smile, even if it was only slightly, and it encouraged him to continue, "Yeah, anyway Calum's not managed to crack them yet-"
"Oi," Calum said irritably, having returned to his station, a few metres away, yet apparently his hearing was still very much up to scratch. "I'm getting there, I'm getting there."
"Ilya Gavrik has decided to hold off on the agreement for a while," Dimitri continued, completely ignoring his colleague. "Until we find out who exactly tried to kill his wife, yet the Gavriks' themselves have been remarkably unhelpful, as has Elena's bodyguard, who was with her at the time. Instead they merely complain at the lack of British security in this country-"
"Elena Gavrik complained?" Harry asked surprised, not noticing Ruth's sudden ducking of the head, in panic at the images of Harry and Elena as lovers; that even now he knew her well enough to question various aspects of her personality.
Dimitri however, remained oblivious to any of this, still as yet unaware of Harry's involvement with Elena Gavrik, and continued, "Well no, Elena didn't actually complain…but Ilya Gavrik was doing quite enough of that for the both of them." He looked at Harry. "I think maybe the Home Secretary's going to demand you talk to them…use the old Harry Pearce charm."
Although she knew well enough that Dimitri was ignorant of Harry's connection to the Gavrik's, Ruth still could not help but release a shaky breath, as once again she became a little unsure of herself, and her relationship with Harry. This time, Harry was very aware of Ruth getting upset at his side, knowing immediately what the bowed head meant. She would never publicly reveal her emotions, and so kept her head down to conceal her face. In order to assure her, Harry tentatively placed a reassuring arm around her back and said enigmatically: "Oh I don't know Dimitri, I think you'll find the Gavrik's are well used to my charm by now. I don't want to use it, and they won't waste any time in avoiding it."
This last statement only made sense to Ruth, who stilled her fidgeting hands slightly, indicating what those words meant to her and that she was somewhat calming down. Dimitri however looked completely lost. "What?"
"He and I were Cold War adversaries," Harry said coolly, and not entirely truthfully justifying his previous statement. "He would know the Harry Pearce persuasion techniques like the back of his hand by now."
Just as Harry finished his sentence, the ringing of a phone sounded from nearby, and Calum picked it up deftly, juggling it with his left hand whilst typing furiously with his right. He nodded in response to whoever the caller was, despite the fact that the person on the other end of the line would not be able to see this action, and muttered a few inaudible comments before depositing the phone back into its cradle.
"Oi Harry! Dimitri!" he called, only bothering to look at them for a few seconds, before wheeling around in his chair to return to his work. "They want you both down in the cells pronto. They've been doing facial recog with our systems, think they've found something. They think Willard might be ready to squeak."
At the mere mention of Willard, Ruth tensed suddenly and noticeably and both Harry and Dimitri stared at her anxiously. It was a point neither Harry nor Ruth had contemplated – that Willard would be in the same building as her. Harry tried to contemplate just how frightening the thought must be to Ruth, that just a few floors down, one of her rapists was sitting unfortunately alive and well. He moved his hand to her back gently, and despite Ruth's sudden paleness she did not pull away. The level of her whiteness was so intense, he feared she was about to be sick all over again, but he felt incredibly proud of her when she shook her head slightly, as in silent promise to herself not to get worked up, and she took two very large deep breaths to calm herself.
On the other hand, Harry felt inexplicable anger at Calum for being so callous and tactless – never mind downright rude, and he shot a sharp glare at Calum's back. He would deal with the younger officer later, whilst Ruth was not around to see him lose his temper. At the moment, he needed her to trust him, and he was never going to achieve that if she was constantly fearful of him losing his temper with her. He looked back down at the precious woman beside him, and smiled gently at her as she continued to take deep soothing breaths. Although he had vowed he was not going to leave her side that day, he really had no choice, for not even the lord himself could persuade him to take Ruth anywhere near that bastard, and Harry himself, desperately wanted to find out what Willard was at last willing to reveal. As he stared at her, he could not help but feel a little over-protective, as a mother hen might act with her chicks, yet, Harry considered with a brief smile, his feelings for her were anything but motherly – or even fatherly. Yet, with the nature of her attack, the fact that both he and Dimitri were needed elsewhere, Erin was trying to negotiate on the phone to the Towers' secretary, and Calum had the emotional tact of a bean, he felt reluctant to leave her on her own here. His eyes strayed automatically to Tariq's death before shooting back almost immediately, realising his mistake. Yet, had the boy still been alive, he knew Ruth would have been safe in his hands. He was stuck, somewhat reluctantly, with Calum.
"I'm going to have to go down and…" Harry said quietly to Ruth, who looked as if she really wished he would not, but she attempted a firm nod anyway.
"Of course." She replied in what sounded like a rather forced rendition of her usual clipped, business-like tone.
"Are you sure you'll be alrig-" he asked, although he knew the answer before he had even finished the question. Ruth, naturally, interrupted impatiently.
"I'll be fine Harry." She said quickly. "For God's sake, I'm not a child."
Knowing she was only putting on a brave face to accompany her usual work tone, Harry smiled and nodded, though inwardly, he could not help but feel a little hurt at her abruptness; he had only had her best interests at heart. Now, Ruth bowed her head in apology for her clipped tone, but said nothing. Instead she wordlessly made her way over to her desk towards the other end of the room, and Harry watched her sadly as she hovered around her station for a moment, as if she was trying to take her return to the grid in properly after everything that had happened.
Sucking his teeth slightly, Harry approached Calum and slammed a hand down on his shoulder with more ferocity then he might have done before the young officer had made his tactless comment. Calum almost jumped out of his skin and turned to face his boss with an obvious look of shock upon his usually smug face.
"Dimitri and I are going to talk to Willard." Harry said in a low voice so that only he and Calum could hear it. "You are going to watch over Ruth whilst we are gone, and call us if there are any problems. Secondly," Harry began, his lip curling slightly to show his indignation. "I know I'm not exactly held in high regards at the moment by either my colleagues or the tribunal, but I am still your boss, and not your drinking buddy – thus you do not address me with 'oi'," Calum gulped slightly and stared into Harry's glaring hazel eyes. "And finally, learnt to gather a little more tact. You do not shout at the top of your voice that one of Ruth's rapists is down in the cells, so that not only she can hear, but the entire Grid as a whole; thus causing even more embarrassment to a woman who needs no more."
Calum gulped once more before nodding slowly, clearly intimidated by the close proximity of the other man. Gradually, Harry nodded in reply and removed his hand from Calum's shoulder, and provided him with a meaningful look before he stood up fully and walked of in the opposite direction towards Dimitri. With a final worried glance at Ruth, he sighed and indicated to Dimitri to follow him through the pods towards the cells below. Calum looked up from his computer, Harry's words still reverberating around his head, and he watched Ruth for a split second. Although she had now seated herself successfully at her desk, her eyes were wide and staring hauntingly before her, almost as if she was in some form of trance or meditation. Her hands were clasped tightly in her lap, her knuckles white, and for the first time since he heard about Ruth's attack, Calum felt genuinely terrified and saddened for her.
Again, this chapter was longer than I intended it to be - hence the lack of appearance of the Home Secretary, however I absolutely promise that the next chapter shall contain more plot and particularly, the revelation of Ruth's little bundle of joy, and the arrival of Towers. In preparation for a few chapters time, I would like to ask you guys if you think the gender of the baby should be a boy or girl, because I'm not sure. I'm leaning towards one particular gender, but I want to see if you agree. In my absence I've been planning this story fully, so I not know exactly what is going to happen, so you're hopefully going to get quicker updates. Please review - they would make a wonderful christmas present xxx