Chapter 21: Gone

A/N: Well here is the next installment! I hope you enjoy it. I'm not sure if I'm having trouble writing because I had been gone for so long and need to slip back into Vik's fur, or if it's 'cause I just don't want the story to end. Though I have been ruminating some other stories… hmmm… Well please feel free to review and tell me what you think!

I slowly but carefully picked my way towards the clearing with each step reaffirming the decision I had made. I made sure to take a particularly winding path as I constantly looked over my shoulder. I had to make sure that no one was following my trail. However, I made a pit stop at my den to pick up my collar. I also knew that I had some time to kill; if anyone had been following me, I needed them to think had just been heading for my den.

I sat on my bed for a moment as I delicately secured the ornament around my neck. I let my paws fall to my lap, landing in a neat pile on top of Romeo and Juliet. I silently leafed through the destroyed pages. I let my mind wander as the words flew in front of my eyes.

I wondered who Romeo and Juliet were. What kind of trials had they been through? Were they best friends or were they ever in love? I looked up at the shelves of books as I held the valued tome squeezed against my chest. All those tales, all those lives stood displayed before me. I quickly found myself regretting my shallow treasure trove. Instead of merely collecting them because they were they were visually appealing, I began wishing I had thoroughly read them. What if somewhere in those stories, an answer to our problem had been recorded into history.

I sighed and stood to turn away from the bookshelf. I couldn't stand to look at the books anymore, there was no use contemplating what I couldn't change. As much as the thought inspired me now, I didn't have the time to read those stories, I just had to take what I had in front of me now. I carried the book to my vanity and placed it gently in front of the mirror and opened it, exposing the secret compartment.

I took a deep, steadying breath and began my work.

I turned to my collection of ribbons and picked through them. I quickly chose my two favorite ribbons, the baby blue one from before Quaxo's gift and a faded, ratty, red ribbon. The red ribbon was the first ribbon I was ever given; it was a gift from Asparagus and Jelly. I quickly but neatly folded the ribbons up and placed them in the book. Even though I loved my diamond collar, I knew that wherever Quaxo and I went, I would need to be practical and treasure his gift.

I then placed a small, travel brush in the compartment along with a few pretty trinkets that I hoped were of some value. I needed to be thinking ahead. I could only take the bare essentials, and even though I didn't really care about the trinkets, maybe there was something in them that we could use to trade with other cats.

I closed the book reverently in front of me with a final glance around the room. My gaze rested on the three pictures secured to my mirror. These were truly rare and valuable possessions.

Some time ago, what Addie called a camera had been dumped in the yard. Addie had spent most of his youth reading the human manuals that had been thrown away. After collecting any manual he could find and extensive reading, Addie had been declared the technology expert of the yard. When the camera had been dropped of in the dumpster, he told us that it was a special camera and we were in luck that there was still 'film' in it.

He told us that it was thrown because some device known as the flash wasn't working, but we could still use it. He showed us when we got in front of it and he pushed the button, and exact image known as a picture would come out of the bottom of the camera.

It didn't even matter that the flash wasn't working, because the tribe had used up the film before the day was out. I was graced with three pictures: one of my family with Jelly and Asparagus, one with the four female queen-kits, and the last one was a picture of Plato and I. I had my arms wrapped around Plato's waist as his arm draped casually around my shoulders. We both beamed at the camera, excited to have one of the last pictures for ourselves.

Tears sprang to my eyes as I slowly reached out to pull the pictures down. Each time the pictures tore free from the adhesives behind them, I flinched. It was as if as each picture came down, it cemented my decision. It as if there was no going back.

I silently slipped the pictures into the pages, making sure not a crease or fold appeared on the pictures. Once my book/makeshift suitcase was complete, I sat staring at the book that seemed to weigh exponentially more than it did before.

I grabbed a crumpled up piece of paper from a small pile in the corner of my den and methodically smoothed it out, placing an almost unreasonable amount of time in flattening each crease. I then grabbed a small stub of a pencil from a box under my vanity and sharpened it with my claws. Once I was satisfied with the tip, I sat gazing at the almost blank paper before me. Who did I want to write my note to? What exactly did I want to say?

The realization hit me that I didn't want to put all my muddied emotions on paper. I wasn't even sure I would be able to keep myself together while simply writing the note. No, I couldn't write a note to everyone. I simply put the pencil to paper and started writing what first came to mind.

The note was addressed to Plato. I hoped that he could convey those feelings that I felt I would only fail at expressing. I prayed that he could make the Jellicles understand why I left, why I was the new Grizabella.

I sniffled as I wiped a tear off of my nose, catching it before it hit the page.

I concluded the letter with the warmest farewells I could put into words. I wanted to make sure that Plato knew how much I would miss him. The hope that we would see each other again rang clear as I concluded with a promise to write to him soon.

Tears began to flow more freely as I folded the paper into thirds with as much care that I had used for flattening the page. I quickly placed the note in a box under my vanity that used to be a box where Plato and I would store secret messages for each other. Only he would think to look there.

My paw quickly retracted from the letter and the box as if it had been burned. I buried my face in my paws as my elbows rested on my knees. I finally let lose the torrent of tears that I had been fighting since I left the clearing.

Plato might not know, or he was fooling himself, but I knew that we would never see each other again after I left. No matter how much I would want to, it would be too dangerous. If the Jellicles still saw Quaxo as a traitor, and if I was seen as no better, then he would only be risking his standing in the tribe to see us. He needed to think about Cetty. Additionally, Macavity didn't take very kindly to losing his possessions, and losing Quaxo, one of his best magicians, would never be forgiven. I was willing to risk my life to be with Quaxo, but there was no reason to put Plato in jeopardy. No, I would write to Plato, but I needed to understand now that I would never see him or hear back because he could never be allowed to know where Quaxo and I settled, if we ever settled.

I sighed and shook my head, gathering the book up in my arms. I stood and turned, surveying my den for the last time. I batted my mirror ball for a final dance with my little snow fairies. I performed a quick pirouette and landed a little clumsily since my arms were burdened with my book.

I figured that I had spent enough time hiding in my den and tentatively stepped towards the entrance. I discretely peeked my head out the opening in the wardrobe and glanced at all the piles surrounding my den. I couldn't find any hint of an observer, not even a single piece of trash out of place.

Once I had made certain that my going would be safe and unobserved, I deftly stepped out of my den, and as I squinted in the glaring sunlight, I quickly ran through the junkyard. My back paws felt like they had grown wings as I sprinted towards the place where loneliness and sadness didn't belong. I ran towards my love, Quaxo.

A smile came to my face immediately as I saw Quaxo's back and his tail swishing back and forth. As I neared the entrance to our clearing, I saw that his tail was moving in exertion as he seemed to be studiously pushing a rather large television set towards the edge of the clearing.

I suppressed a giggle as I stood there and simply watched as my tom worked. I knew that he was doing it for me, for us. He wanted our clearing to be clean with as much passion as I had in the past. Even though I had not been able to spend too much time in the clearing, I knew how often trash must fall off the piles, and yet I never saw any. I could easily guess that Quaxo had been carefully clearing it away. It was his way of showing his hope. He was doing his best to demonstrate that he expected to stay in the yard and that our clearing needed to be clear so that we could dance in it every day. I saw his muscles strain as he tried to push the set a last few feet.

This time I couldn't suppress the giggle. I allowed my laughter to fill the clearing as I gingerly placed the book off to the side and trotted over to Quaxo. At the first sound of my laughter, the magical tom turned towards me, a smile already lit on his face.

He held his arms out to me as I ran to meet him. My paws found their place around his neck as his found where they belonged at my waist. I gave him a quick squeeze before placing a gentle kiss on his lips.

His laughter mingled with mine as he nuzzled my neck. Anyone watching would have suspected that we were two lovers who had not seen each other for years. In fact, it had been less than twenty-four hours, but even that had been too long.

Our laughter turned to purrs as I continued to let out a few fits of giggles.

Quaxo's paws gently cupped my cheeks gazing intently into my eyes. I found myself lost in his copper pools. They seemed to dance with mischief. I wasn't sure if it was the magic burning deep within in him or if he was simply happy to see me. Whatever the reason was, I knew that I could get forever lost in them and never look away, and I would be blissfully enraptured for the rest of my life.

After a moment, his smile broke even wider, if that was possible, as he kissed my nose. "What's the good news? Did you think of something?" as he asked, his voice seemed to be tinged with the laughter he was suppressing.

I let a hint of sadness touch my heart before I quickly banished it. I couldn't suppress my smile as I leaned forward to kiss him a second time. I then took his paws in my own and kissed each center pad. I looked back into his eyes, resisting the urge to be lost in them again. I then gave my head a slight snake. "No, but our deadline is so close…I've just come to terms with the fact that its not going to happen."

I saw his eyes quickly fade and his smile became lost to me. He immediately looked away and refused to meet my eyes from that point on. He turned from me with a kind of awkwardness as if his limbs were numb.

I stood where I was, watching him as he began to pick up minute pieces of trash. It was the kind of trash that normally wouldn't be given a second glance in a clearing, but I could tell that Quaxo was just trying to keep his paws busy. I felt like he was mad at me, and I was the naughty kitten waiting for a generous word from her mother.

After a while of the silence, I was about to finally say something when Quaxo beat me to the punch.

"What if we made an extension?" His voice was low and gruff, but I could tell now that he wasn't mad, but just hurt. I could only guess that he was hurt that I had given up.

I hadn't thought about it, but what if he was depending on this plan as much as I had been? I could tell, even if no one else could, that he had loved his time with the tribe. He had finally had a family and friends. Just as much as he wanted me to be able to stay in the yard, he wished to stay as well.

I folded my paws in front of my chest watching the wind play with my fur. I remembered the clouds drifting through the sky, and immediately knew my answer. We couldn't keep living like this: a future uncertain. No, I was sure that this was an impossible task, and if we gave ourselves this one extension, there was no telling if we would have the control to stick to the next one. I didn't want to live like that and I knew that Quaxo didn't either. We had to face the truth and move forward without looking back.

I tried to answer him as gently as I could. I understood how he felt, and I didn't want him to think I had made this decision lightly. "Quaxo… We can't make an extension. Two weeks was plenty of time. As I said, I think Mac outplayed us a little…" I knew that he wouldn't like hearing that, but we couldn't stay in this yard in denial. So I tried to brighten up. I smiled again and ran to his side, wrapping one arm around his and seizing his other paw, trash and all. I squeezed his arm to my chest, purring happily. "But just think, once we leave, we can be together. No more only seeing each other for a few hours! No more hiding!"

He let a small smile curve the corner of his mouth and a tentative purr spring from his chest. He dropped the trash from his paw and reached out to cup my cheek. I willingly met his paw, my purr increasing in intensity when our eyes met. After a few moments of total bliss, he let his paw drop and fingered my collar absentmindedly. He let his eyes drop to the gems placed delicately around my neck.

After a few moments, he finally replied, his voice low and quiet; I had to strain to hear him. "I just want you to be happy…with me and your family. I don't want to know that I made you leave…"

I was about to protest when he raised his paw to my cheek again and his eyes met mine. It was all I needed to tell that he wanted me to remain silent and let him finish.

"That being said, for me and for you, please don't give up. We still have over forty hours, there's plenty of time to think of something. And we won't leave if we come up with an idea. Even if you think up something in the last minute, I won't budge from this yard until we've tried it."

I smiled, taking his paw in mine, pressing it further against my cheek. I closed my eyes, making sure I chose each work carefully. "Thank you Quaxo. But I don't want you to feel any guilt. I promise you I'll keep trying to think of something, but I want you to know it's okay if we have to leave. You're right, I lived a wonderful life here and I love each cat in the junkyard. However, on that same note, since I had a wonderful, full, long life here, it's okay if I have to leave, as long as it means I can stay with you. You are my new life. Don't forget that."

His purr reignited and became much louder. "As long as you promise not to give up." He replied as he disentangled his arm from mine and took hold of my other cheek. He acted like he had only listened to the first half of my statement, but I knew he had heard the whole speech; I could tell by the light in his eyes.

He leaned forward, kissing me again. I couldn't suppress the shivers running up and down my spine. Even after all the kisses, he still had this affect on me. It felt very similar to the time he had let his actual magic flow through me, but I knew that this was different; this was the magic of us.

As he withdrew his face from mine, he began to wipe the tears from eyes. I wasn't sure what the source of the tears was, happiness or sadness, but his touch instantly comforted me.

"Just know that I will never make you choose between me and your family. If ever you want to stay here, I will always follow you." He purred as he wiped the last tear.

I rolled my eyes, letting a giggle escape. "It will never be a choice. I guess I'm in too deep." I said as I kissed his cheek.

With the conversation at an end, I bent over to pick up the trash that he had dropped. Unable to remove the smile from my face, I began skipping towards the edge of the clearing to deposit it in its rightful place on the pile.

As I made my away across the clearing, I couldn't help but think how much I had matured in the past week and a half. All those things I had noticed about my queen-friends I could actually apply to me. I had left kittenhood behind and finally grown up.

After I deposited my burden, I turned back to see Quaxo resting peacefully on our little tablecloth. I couldn't suppress the smile as I began to jog over to join him.

However, in the middle of my travel, a kind of fluttering caught the corner of my eye. I turned to see the wind blowing my book open as the picture of Plato and I escaped its paper confines.

I let out a shriek as I sprinted after the renegade picture. I could only think of a few times where my feet moved with the same speed and desperation. I quickly picked my way up the junk pile, reaching out and grabbing the picture at the last minute.

Just as my paw grasped the picture, a sickening noise reached my ears. It was a sound I had only heard once before. It was an explosion, a decimation of the peace that had so frailly been built.

I let my limbs go dead as I slid down the pile landing in a heap on my tail. I sat there for a minute, not sure if I had imagined what I heard.

A second explosion echoed through the clearing. The noise seemed to jar me out of my trance and I was quickly on my feet. I ran across the clearing and threw my arms around Quaxo's neck, tears pouring from my eyes.

"Please!" I shrieked, terror reverberating through my voice. I could tell from the look on Quaxo's face that I hadn't been making up the noise in my head. "Please! Don't leave me! You could get hurt or even killed! You can't go! We-we could just leave! I can't be alone!"

My mind had became so selfish and one-tracked. All that maturity that I had been contemplating was gone.

A/N: Dun, dun, dun! Well my dear readers, we are nearing the end! I hope you enjoyed! Please review, it always inspires me to read them!