Chapter 21 – Myrnin's POV – "Your Cruelty Astounds Me"

The sun was fading over the horizon, as I recalled the night before, with exact clarity – every touch… every look…every taste. A low growl of desire, emanated from my throat, as I admired her bare silhouette beneath the sheet. I wondered what dreams entertained her. My mind worked to comprehend our wholly changed dynamic, from one night to the next. She was MINE, the feral side of my nature contemplated, in deep satisfaction.

I was so instinctually tuned to her emotions, I had sensed the change in her immediately – she seemed to be exploring her thoughts, awakening her mind to what her body was already feeling. Hmmm…her body…. A familiar vibration coursed through me and it took a shocking amount of control, to hold myself back, from taking her right then – I shook myself, no, we had work to do tonight – I had to focus.

Flashes of the night before, invaded my senses – the feel of her skin in the rain, her intoxicating scent, the moment…she became mine.

No, we would never get home, if I never let her leave the bed….I shook myself again, fighting against what I wanted. I felt my pupils dilate and without knowing how I got there, found myself next to her on the bed.

Claire stirred at the motion, and slowly opened her eyes; the happiness on her face overwhelmed my senses and I stared back at her in awe. She blushed under the intensity of my gaze, silently sharing the memories of the night before, with me.

"Good evening, Cariad" I whispered. "I thought you would like sustenance early, as we have much to do tonight," motioning to the tray sitting on the other table. I stroked her cheek and backed off of the bed, on my way to the door, mentioning, "I need a minute, but will be back soon." I knew I would need to feed more frequently now, in order to maintain any shred of control around her.

Understanding lit her expression, and…something else? I had to physically grasp the door, to keep myself in place, as she slipped the covers off and stepped out of the bed, her naked skin shimmering in the moonlight. She knew what she was doing – and that it was dangerous – which made me want her even more.

"Hmmm…Your cruelty astounds me…" I growled low with desire; using every ounce of determination I had, to force myself out of the door.

The gleaming calculation in her eyes, belying her overly-innocent smile as she purred, "You're restraint astounds me…I will have to work on that…" But she didn't come any closer; knowing it would only take one small step for me to completely lose my tenuous grip on my control.

I was breathing hard when I finally made it out of the door, the unnecessary action calming me. I had never experienced this side of her before, and I thrilled at the thought of exploring it thoroughly.

When I returned, Claire was fully clothed and perched on the edge of a chair, gently researching the tattered books, diagrams and manuscripts laid out on the table. I reveled in the familiarity – sharing our common love of knowledge, with her once again. She tilted her head expectantly toward me, and my eyes lingered on her soft skin, counting the beats of the pulse in her neck. Her laugh was pure and unaffected, as she noticed the wistful look in my eyes, and teased, "Is someone still hungry?" My eyes widened at her boldness – this was a whole new side to her. I couldn't determine if she completely trusted me not to bite her or wanted me to. She laughed again at my inability to respond, and held out a book. "Look, I found something. There is reference to time and 'magic' – but, from the description, it sounds like, what we refer to as energy."

I crossed the room and settled on a low couch next to the table, accepting the text from her and began to read, commenting, "Indeed, many facets of their magic were precursors to scientific principles we hold true today. It's a shame so many of them burned at the hands of zealots, fearful of change."

I jumped up, excited to show her the illustrations I found earlier. "Here! These drawings – they are alchemical symbols for many processes fundamental to portal theory and manipulation. These four are most promising."

Claire walked around the table to view them from my vantage point, wrapping her arms around me from behind, as she peeked around my right side to see the drawings. I instinctually lifted my arm, so that it did not impede her field of vision, letting it rest gently over her shoulder. "Yes, I recognize these features here," she said, moving her hand to outline each one with her finger.

I had stopped listening the moment she touched me. I vaguely recalled her pointing to something on the table, but was much more interested in the way her other hand slid up my chest. I turned in her embrace to face her, coiling one arm around the small of her back, while sliding the other up to cradle her head in my hand, closing the distance between our lips.

Her lips were warm as they moved against mine. "Wait." She whispered. "We…need to…portals…"

I growled and deepened the kiss, effectively stopping the conversation. Claire moaned softly, surrendering to me again. I curled my fingers into the hair on the nape of her neck and gently pulled her head back, so that I had better access to trail kisses from her neck down to her chest.

"Myrnin," She said breathlessly.

I quite enjoyed when she did that.

"We…we need…to get back to work…"

Hmmm…clearly, I never should have left her mouth available to speak. I sighed and stopped moving, knowing she was right; but finding it almost impossible to let her go.

She felt my internal struggle and laughed softly, "Tonight…" she promised me.

I growled again as I softened my grip on her, and she took a tiny step back.

"Teach me…" she asked.

I pulled her back to me tightly, and whispered suggestively, "Anything…what would you like to learn?"

She laughed again. "Focus…portals – "

I sighed heavily and let her go. "Okay. A Time Portal takes a tremendous amount of strength – you have to meld all of your senses and your thoughts together – and then force the energy to submit to your imagination. Let me show you." As I mentally forced the portal open, the horrendous pain hit and I slumped forward to absorb the shock of it.

I felt Claire's hands on my face as she whispered urgently, "Stop."

I released my breath, and stumbled back, landing on the couch. The portal snapped shut. Claire sat next to me, worry etched on her face. "You know I have to do this," I told her softly.

She nodded mutely, her eyes in agony.

"I could have a Hotel attendant take you to the Garden for an hour or so, while I practice," I suggested. There was no reason we both needed to suffer.

The force of her response shocked me. "I will not leave you," she replied fiercely.

I was stunned to see and feel the depth of her emotion – no wonder she had struggled so deeply, trying to deny herself, what she really wanted, for so long. I wrapped my arms around her, nuzzling into her neck, "Ah, Cariad".

"We do this together – or not at all," she whispered softly, but her tone did not lose any of its determination.

I went completely still, as understanding reached me, and then leaned back to search her eyes – "Not at all?" My voice halted, "Is that what you want – to stay here together? We can do that…if you want it. I have plenty of wealth. We could go anywhere…do anything we wanted." I struggled to stay calm as that dream washed over me, and I realized how badly I wanted it.

Her eyes twisted in pain, as she stroked my cheek, "I…can't leave…my parents. Not like that."

I pulled back, "Is that all? Or, are there more reasons…people…you cannot leave behind?" I thought we were past this, and horror washed through me as I waited for her answer – I knew I wouldn't survive losing her now.

I was beyond hiding the anguish of that thought from her. I saw her face shift from confusion to surprise and back to determination of a different kind as she climbed onto my lap, straddling me. She held each side of my face firmly in her delicate hands, forcing me to look into the depths of her eyes, as she whispered with assurance, "I love you…I was an idiot for not recognizing it for so long, and then fighting it, but I know it now."

I crushed my lips to hers, as the reality of her love, grew in me. I deepened the kiss, as I wrapped one arm around her waist, lifting her as I stood. Heat was rolling off of her, as she feverishly kissed me back, entwining her fingers into the curls of my hair, and wrapped her legs around me, as I carried her to the bed.

I had no intention of stopping now.

With my free hand, I climbed onto the bed, set her down gently, and settled myself on top of her, rocking forward with my hips into her, to let her know what I wanted and fully intended to do.

She gasped and moaned loudly in response; I felt her nails dig into my back.

I lifted slightly to run my hand over her curves down to her belly. Claire shivered in response and moved her hand under my shirt, sliding up my chest. I pulled the garment off, the seams tearing easily as it released from me, to give her better access. Her fingers trailed down to release the tie on my pants. I effortlessly slid them off and let them fall to the ground, and then flipped her over so that she was sitting on top of me. I could feel her soft skin against mine and knew she didn't have any undergarments on under the shift dress she was wearing. She squirmed trying to position herself over me, but I held her hips still, making her wait; eliciting a small whimper from the back of her throat. "The dress," I whispered.

Claire locked her eyes on me, and slowly lifted the garment over her head and let it fall. I was momentarily stunned at her beauty in the half-light; it was as if I was seeing her for the first time. She lifted her hips again against my hands again, and I let her find what she was looking for; shuddering when she settled in place.

Our second time was no less intense than the first. Maybe more so, as we freely explored each other, unhindered by the shyness that first touch brings. I had always enjoyed the side of Claire that was feisty and determined, never backing down from me – but had no idea how strongly that side would play into a sexual relationship. I must admit, I loved it. She was bold and playful, and I found it shockingly difficult to hold back, more than a few times, when she whispered her needs in my ear or moved her body in unexpected ways.

"What are you smiling at?" Claire interrupted my reverie and I looked over to where she was sitting again at the table. She had slipped into a barely-there sheer undergarment, with an intricate hand-stitched lace pattern; with one leg tucked up on the chair, resting her chin on her knee, as she shuffled through papers.

"Let's go swimming!" I said. In an instant, I moved from the bed to the couch across from her, causing her to shift in surprise at my sudden change in position.

"What?"

"Swimming! It's a warm clear night; the stars will be out."

She giggled, "I think the Garden fountain might be a tad too shallow to really swim in."

"Hmmm. I hadn't considered the fountain – I like it! But no, I was referring to the waterfall the night we arrived."

"Oh," she breathed, her eyes lighting up with excitement. "Yes."

I jumped up, "Perfect!"

"Wait! First, we finish working – and you put pants on, while we do it!"

I sulked, "But you don't have pants on."

Claire laughed, "I will put pants on, if you don't – would you prefer I get dressed?"

"You are a cruel, cruel woman," I said, slipping on pants and settled back down on the couch. "Okay, where were we?"

"I want to try opening a Time Portal," Claire was hesitant, but I saw the determination in her eyes when she spoke.

My mood changed instantly, as I rejected the thought of her being in that much pain, "No," I said darkly.

Claire stepped out of the chair and walked to me, placing a hand on my arm. "You know I have to do this," she repeated my earlier words.

"No," I said again "I will open the portal. You just need to concentrate on where you land."

"Are you sure that will be enough?"

"Yes. I just need to practice." I looked into her eyes, knowing it would not be easy for either of us, "Are you ready for me to try again?"

I could see pain reflected in her expression, as she prepared herself, but she nodded her head without hesitation. I spent the next hour opening and reopening Time Portals; feeling a very gradual lessoning in pain, each time I did it. I was able to successfully hold it open and navigate it to locations in my mind. Claire never left my side. I felt her cringe each time, but she started breathing more normally toward the end, as she saw the change in the severity of pain on my face.

I was spent, and leaned against the couch, letting my head rest back. Claire gently slid my hair away from my face. I turned to smile weakly at her. "I think that is enough for tonight. Let's go."

Claire nodded in relief as she kissed my cheek, and went into the guest room to change. As she settled on something, she called to me from the other room, "Myrnin, how long had Anwyn been looking for you, and how was she actually able to do it after all of this time – especially when very relevant memories of you were missing?"

"I am not certain. She had a blood bond to me, and told me that helped; but I believe she just never cared to try before then."

Claire walked back into the room and stopped "A blood bond?"

"She's tasted my blood…" I tried to say it nonchalantly, to avoid the look I expected, and then saw come to fruition, as Claire's countenance fell. I was at her side in an instant, "No, Cariad, it was not like that…" I lifted her chin gently, so that she could read the sincerity in my eyes, "It was the night I left. We fought and she bit me. Nothing more…"

Claire relaxed, and I felt the tension leave her body. I took her hand and we headed out the door.