Hi pals!
I'm finally returning to FanFiction... so sorry for the time it took me to upload this new chapter, but it's finally here. And writing the next ones, so don't worry about the time, huh! Thank you to the few people who had the willingness to write a review.
Hope you enjoy this chapters, before they knew what the Volturi are planning for them.
Okay, I leave you to read it. Enjoy it. =DD
Chapter 20. NEW
I had felt something more than excitement when I listened to her heart beating for the last time. Because she would finally be with me, but...
I actually couldn't believe that this had arrived so fast. Just at the moment when we had thought that everything was perfect, that Bella would keep enjoying her human life for a while longer by my side, without the need of quitting to her father, Charlie and her mother, Renee, that little detail, our ignorance was the guilty that had made us change our plans.
The future that had seemed so quiet and full of love for a few more years. Everything I had wanted was becoming true. Everything I wanted was that Bella enjoyed her humanity before giving up completely on herself before join me for eternity.
It wasn't that I regretted something, now we were more than just Bella and I, I had been able to give her a family as I had never dreamed I were going to. Renesmee.
Speaking of families, each member of our family, Esme, Emmett, Jasper and Alice, except for Rosalie and Renesmee, walked into the room just in the moment in which Bella's heartbeats stopped dead, extinguished for eternity. There was no other sound, not even of our breathings.
All I could see in their minds were anxious thoughts, and at the same time a little surprised of seeing that the change had happened so quickly. It had only been two days.
Two days? Would it be because of the straight to her heart injection? Carlisle was wondering.
Jasper was the member of the family who was tenser. We'll have to be really careful with her, Edward.
Whoa, she was fast. Two days. Cool. Emmett was excited to see Bella again.
Alice was smiling lightly, she already knew what'd happen. Everything'll be fine, Edward. You'll see.
Though I could see her visions of the future, I wouldn't be calmed until what she was showing me actually happened.
Everyone were begging and pleading to me to keep calmed, that all the nightmare was over, that everything would finally be okay, that Bella and I, and now Renesmee would be together forever. It was almost overwhelming to hear them, but part of my mind, was so focused on every movement that Bella did, that it was difficult for me to focus on what my family was thinking.
Then, her eyes opened to give some space to the only access I had to her thoughts. I prepared myself to see what was next, I knew they wouldn't be the beautiful chocolate brown eyes I loved so much, I knew, still it was surprisingly to see that red color shining in her. I controlled myself to not let a gasp escape from me. Bella didn't even start to being conscious of her surroundings, she didn't even know that we were there in the same room that her, watching her.
It was great relief, that after two long days, the longest days of my existence, Bella were finally opening her eyes, giving me access to her again.
It was a great relief to know that now eternity was waiting for us in front of us.
My hand was still holding hers, I decided not to move, Bella would freak out for surely. She didn't seem to notice that I was holding it.
I focused then, in Jasper's mind, reading every emotion that crossed through Bella.
The first thing Bella saw when she opened her eyes, was the light that shined above her. Her eyes concentrated on the light for an eighth of a second in what she was seeing, I could imagine what it was, being able to see for myself what she was seeing.
I knew perfectly well that one of the first she would notice, something that her human eyes wouldn't have been able to distinguish, an eighth color.
To which, not even Carlisle had a name.
I concentrated in the deep back of my mind to what Jasper was feeling on Bella. There was nothing more than curiosity and wonder to what she was seeing. It made me feel a little better, to see that Bella was feeling good, for now.
Her eyes were still looking above her.
She seems to be reacting well. But... we have to wait for her to get up. Jasper was thinking, a little worried by her behavior afterwards, the one of an uncontrolled newborn. My forehead frowned for a thousandth of a second, and then smoothed as quickly as it had frowned.
Carlisle was analyzing intently to each of her movements, to each action Bella made. Esme was just anxious to see that Bella were fine, so she could finally see me relieved.
Emmett was excited to see Bella awake, and there a small part of him that was worried for everyone else, for our family. Jasper had insisted that both of them should be at the front in case Bella lost control over herself.
Alice, I sighed mentally, Alice was Alice. She was deeply focused on the future, searching for some reason why Jasper didn't get calmed not even a little. She didn't see anything out of control, something to be worried about, so I calmed down. I saw Bella launching herself at me with her arms wide open, then Carlisle asking how was she feeling, then Alice bringing a mirror so Bella would see herself before leaving to hunt...
That reminded her. You promised that I would be there the first time that Bella saw herself in a mirror, hey! You're not taking her to hunt before that happens. Alice told me, while she winked at me. No one else than us noticed our exchange.
In that moment, Jasper felt shock emanating from Bella, but a reaction, more of surprise than something else. I didn't dare to take a look at Jasper and his expression, my eyes were glued to Bella. In the same instant, Bella inhaled, and by what I saw, her emotions were nice, she liked what she was smelling. Of course she did, it was a sensation almost wonderful the way we could taste the aromas that were on the air, she should be experimenting it in that moment.
Bella started breathing, and we with her. I kept reading her reactions in the mind of Jasper, and there was something around us that she found pleasant.
In this moment, it was one of those in which more desperate I felt about not being able to read her mind.
What are you thinking? I wanted to say.
Then, at the same moment in which a car passed by the highway with Rap music, Jasper felt a new emotion in Bella, she was bewildered. She had surely heard the same thing. Then scare.
What had scared her?
I was immediately anxious because of her reaction. She should be so confused with what was happening, that the fear was getting the best of her. Desperate to reassure her that everything was now fine, I gently squeezed her hand, my mind was in two places at the same time, Bella's face and Jasper's mind. I could see than more shock ran through Bella when she felt my hand on hers.
Watch out, Edward! Don't surprise her that way... Alice warned me while she showed me what would be happening in a second.
During a long second it was the only emotion that emanated from her, and then, her muscles got rigid and arched, she let go of my hand and got away from me, her back against the wall, air hissing out of her mouth.
It felt so bad, so painful to see and feel that reaction on Bella to my touch. Maybe because it had never happened such thing, Bella had never been frightened or gotten away from me. I knew it was immature of me to feel that fear. It had only been confusion, at not being familiarized to out now equal temperature. Her skin didn't feel cold, but either warm. Bella, surely, should have been waiting for my cold skin...
Still, it hurt not having her hand in mine. It had been two whole days without getting away from her side for not even a second. It had not even been half a second, when I felt the change in her emotions.
While Bella was realizing what was happening, that it was me who had been holding her hand, I only wanted to be close to her. Suddenly, all the thoughts behind me disappeared for a thousandth of a second. My entire body and mind was focused on Bella, on being with her, on never having to be apart from each other again, on the life that was waiting for us with Renesmee. It was an indescribable sensation the happiness that made me feel that thought alone. Anxious for having her hand in mine, I leaned over the table towards her, I raised my hand in her direction, waiting for her to come back to me.
Patience, my son. She must still be adjusting to everything. It must be confusing for her.
Bella's eyes returned to my face, and they immediately passed to the faces of my family. Emmett and Jasper were in front of everyone else, watching out that Bella wouldn't do anything she could regret later. As if I were going to allow anything to happen. Bella noticed the position my brothers were in, and she noticed the reason. Danger. Her body reacted the same way any of us would have, her nose trying to find the danger it seemed to be, not understanding why my brothers were like that for... her.
Her eyes rested, then, on Alice's face. She was behind Jasper, logically.
Well, it's time the atmosphere gets relaxed. Alice told me, while she was leaning from behind Jasper and smiled at Bella.
Bella, it seemed, felt relieved and confidence on Alice's smile, and her position relaxed, leaving the attack position from just an instant ago.
Then, finally, her eyes rested on my face. It was a relief to feel her so close to me, to see her so healthy, so alive, that it almost seemed another dream, or just part of my imagination, or even more likely, just a mirage that cruel faith was showing to me, playing with my joy.
She saw me for a instant, her mind, I could see from Jasper, was totally focused on my face. A gasp left her lips.
All this time, three second maybe had been since she had gotten away from me, they had seemed like an eternity, and I decided that it was time to be by her side again. Very carefully of not scaring her with my movements, she was still getting used to, I moved toward her, surrounding the table.
Edward, son, careful! Carlisle and Esme were thinking almost the same thing. I ignored them.
Why hadn't she said anything yet? I could remember the pain that had caused her before and during her transformation. Did she hate me, as I had so much feared that she would if I condemned her to this life?
"Bella?" I kept my voice low, trying to make it sound calm, but I may not have fooled even Bella.
Not answer again. I focused an instant on Jasper, but there was no fear or hate in Bella. That made me confident, just a bit, that my fear were just that, fear, not reality. Her silence should be bewilderment about everything being so different, my face, my voice, my temperature, everything...
"Bella, love? I'm sorry, I know it's disorienting. But you're all right. Everything is fine."
Still, Bella didn't say anything. She may have been considering what I had just told her. There were too much to think about. It was true, Jasper felt the change in her emotions. Irritation running through her mind. While Bella considered my words, I continued getting closer to her, half ignoring the thoughts of my family that begged me to be careful.
I could guess what Bella was thinking in.
Renesmee...
Jacob and the pack...
The treaty with Sam...
Charlie...
There was an answer for all each of her doubts, though they weren't all in my power. I didn't certainly know what had happened with each one, just Ness-Renesmee, though there was the question about her accelerate growth, we weren't still sure of what would happen about it; and of Jacob I didn't even want to think about, but Bella's doubt would be about the treaty with Sam for sure; and Charlie, I only knew that Carlisle had spoken with him before leaving and her had said that Bella was in Atlanta, only that. But, it was hardly the best moment to worry about that. Not even I could focus on those issues, the only thing I wanted was to be near her.
When I were close enough to her body, to her face, I raised my hand slowly, so Bella wouldn't react like before, that she saw my intentions. With my fingertips I caressed her cheek, and imagined how her skin would have blushed with my touch. In that moment, I felt the same electric current running slowly thought my body, subtle but going higher. Her skin was just as soft as I remembered it, her temperature was now the same than mine, it was warm, and every thousandth of a second that I kept my skin against hers, the electricity got out of control inside of me.
While my hand was getting closer to her cheek to touch it with the palm of it, and cuddle it, my mind registered the change in her emotions.
Yearning?
Even Jasper was surprised when he felt that reaction from Bella to my touch.
I raised my eyebrow, I was a little surprised because I still had that kind of potential on her, that even as a newborn she could feel desire for me as I felt for her...
Surprising me again, just like everyone, Bella launched her arms around me.
I felt an incredible relief by having her by my side, that it was almost indescribable. As if were once again complete, as if I were able to breathe now that Bella was with me, and by what it seemed because of her reaction, she too wanted to be with me. She rested her face on my chest, her arms around my neck, the scene and the feeling were so familiar, that I could almost forget the situation we were in. she was a newborn just waking up after the venom burnt her…
Unaware of the strength she now had, the strength she was exercising into me, she made me say for the first time thanks to her an ow, not before I tried to half got away from her strong embrace, not wanting to completely do that, I pulled away a little bit from her, her eyes raised to my face, and without needing to see it through Jasper, I saw the emotions in her eyes, confusion and fright by my reaction.
I had to explain to her, I would never want to be away from her. I would rather she turned me into dust. "Um… carefully, Bella. Ow."
Her arms let go of me immediately, and put them behind her back, understanding the reason for my reaction. Again, leaving me caused me a pang of pain, I controlled myself.
"Oops." Bella said silently.
I smiled in the way that always caused her heart to beat uncontrollably, and her breathing to stop. Almost waiting for it to happen, remembering that it wouldn't anymore.
Taking her words for me as much for her, I told her. "Don't panic, love." I raised my hand to caress her open lips. Again, the electricity was running through me. "You're just a bit stronger than I am for the moment."
My hand caressed her cheek again, unable to keep myself away from her skin. Another wave of desire ran through her.
How can she feel desire for Edward? Her thirst is supposed to be so unbearable… Jasper was thinking, wondering what Bella was feeling.
Then, she took her hand from behind her back, I could see that she was doing in such a careful way, more than necessary, and she raised it toward my face. Her fingertips caressing my cheek in the same way I had been doing it, sending more currents through my entire body, making it difficult for me to think in our companion, when everything I wanted was to be only with her…
Her eyes were staring intently into mine, when she told me. "I love you."
Those simple words, sent me to ecstasies. Happiness running through me, there was nothing more that I could for more than to listen to her saying that.
I smiled widely, feeling that my face wasn't enough for me to show to her all the happiness I was feeling, and the relief by realizing that Bella was still loving me like the first day.
"As I love you."
Without being able to stop myself another second more, without being able to stop the sudden desire that attacked me for just touching her, of having her lips over mine once again, wanting to prove that this were really the heaven we had so much searched for Bella and I, I leaned down slowly to her. Like the first time, my slow movements asked her to be careful, of course, that now that careful had to be had by her with me.
Slowly, I closed the distance between our lips, thinking all the time that this would like our very first kiss. In this occasion there would be no fears controlling me, I could kiss her for the first time in a full and total way, show her all the love that I felt about to make me explode with expectation…
Our lips met, and I felt the current of electricity that I so much missed when touching her lips.
I kissed her sweetly, and then, without being aware of my surroundings, as if we were locked up in our own bubble, I let myself give completely to her. All the passion, all the love and the desire I felt for her freed for the first time.
Our breathings became so fast as if we were still humans. I realized that Bella had also forgotten that we had companion when her body curved toward me in an inappropriate way. But for the moment, I didn't care at all. Bella could do anything she wanted with me…
The thought sent a shiver through my back of pleasure. Remembering the moments in which I had kissed Bella. That very first time when we were coming from our meadow, how this kiss had begun almost the same way, with me hesitating before touching her sweet lips, sweetly, gently, to not hurt her… now she was the one who had to be careful with me. How ironic!
But again, I would rather turned into dust into her strong embrace than being away from her.
Every part of my body felt about to explode with the excessive charge of electricity that was running through my body while her lips were kissing me. Now there was so much that I could have from her and she from me that before hadn't been possible. More than her lips with my tongue…
I still didn't finish enjoying the happiness that I was feeling all over me, that didn't let me get away from her lips for not even a second, when I listened to Emmett grumble in his mind.
Get a room!
I ignore him for a moment. Enjoying of this moment of happiness at my Bella's side. Everything had stayed behind us, all the suffering and the waiting for this moment to arrive. We would finally be together for all eternity. As I had wished since the first moment, as Bella had wanted.
Then, he cleared his throat in an attempt to get our attention. I immediately felt Bella stopped and got away from me.
I felt a pang of irritation with Emmett for having interrupted, but otherwise, we had all the time in the world…
Shame was what I was reading in her face, and in Jasper's mind. At least I knew that I could still read some of her emotions with just seeing her face. Her cheeks would've been burning red this moment. The heat I would've felt irradiating toward me.
I chuckled before moving to her side when she did. I wasn't going to allow not even a millimeter to be of distance between her and me. Nothing could separate us. I wrapped her waist tightly with my arms. I felt as if my face were glowing with glee and relief by being able to say, finally, that all the fears had stayed behind us. There was nothing that mattered, just that Bella would be with me forever.
Everything was perfect now.
Surely all of this Bella could see, too. Realizing of how much happy we would be very soon. Together the two of us, and by our daughter's side, Renesmee. A family.
Bella took a deep breath, and turned her face toward mine. Accusation in her eyes.
"You've been holding out on me." Her eyes narrowing.
I laughed, without being able to help it when I heard her getting a conclusion so right on target. Everything I had been doing while she was still human, was held out on her, her blood, her body especially. All of her, and now there was no need. "It was sort of necessary at the time. Now it's your turn to not break me." I laughed again.
Bella frowned her forehead at my words, and everyone else started laughing too.
Oh, Edward. He finally looks so happy. It was about time to have his full happiness… Esme was thinking.
Alice took a quick look at me and winked. I told you so. Was everything she said, knowing perfectly what she meant.
Well, it's time to get a little serious. Carlisle thought, a little ashamed of having to interrupt.
Carlisle walked toward us, rounding Emmett. Jasper moved behind him. His eyes were on Bella.
She's doing it too much well for being a newborn. Would she keep going, or is it just a lapse? Jasper wasn't sure that Bella would keep doing so well as she had been so far, thinking that her thirst could be too much at any moment. He was making that I myself got worried too. But at the same time, I tried to push those thought away.
But it was almost impossible, my mind was so focused on many things at that moment, on Bella, on Carlisle getting closer to her, on Jasper reading each one of her emotions…
Would it be possible for Bella to lose control at any moment?
It didn't matter if it really happened, because I would be here to take care that nothing happened to Bella that she could regret. And she knew that.
"How do you feel, Bella?"
Bella thought about it before answering.
The time I had most been dreading these days was coming. Listening to the way Bella had been coping, knowing if she had suffered or not, thought deeply I knew the answer.
I was almost begging internally to be able to listen to her answer. On the other side, I wasn't sure that Bella were going to be one hundred percent hones with Carlisle. I was by her side, and she knew that every one of her words would stay etched in my memory, and if she had suffered, the guilt would fall in my shoulders. Even when not even a scream of pain had escaped her lips, I could see the suffering she had been through every time her breathing escaped her lips as a gasp.
"Overwhelmed. There's so much…" her voice trailed off. I could imagine the reason and so did Carlisle.
Thought my mind crossed the moments in which Esme, Rosalie, Emmett and myself had woken up and opened our eyes to this new life, or existence.
We had all felt the same confusion when we saw for the first time the things as they actually were. We could smell intensely every each perfume that floated in the air, we could taste that same perfume in out tongues, we could listen to each sound that passed and before we hadn't been able to, we moved in such a way that what we saw didn't even moved or became blurry.
"Yes, it can be quite confusing."
Bella nodded quickly, before continuing. "But I feel like me." Her words caused me so much relief, after all the time that had been her biggest fear. "Sort of. I didn't expect that."
I lightly squeezed my arms around her waist, and I leaned down to whisper in her ear. "I told you so."
I don't understand… Jasper was still wondering to himself what was happening, when there was nothing to be worried about, it was becoming too much for him.
I tried not to worry about his theories, or about his worry. I focused on what Carlisle and Bella were interchanging.
"You are quite controlled. More so than I expected, even with the time you had to prepare yourself mentally for this."
Let's hope she keeps it going.
I considered what Carlisle said. It was true that Bella had had too much time to prepare herself, my family had told her so many stories to let Bella being aware of what this life would bring to hers. Rosalie and Jasper, especially.
Bella kept quiet for a moment, considering what Carlisle was telling her surely. "I'm not sure about that."
Her answer left me tense for a minute, before remembering the difficulties we went through when recently waking up for the change. Everything was difficult to control, and remembering the way her emotions changed a moment ago all of a sudden… I understood what she meant.
Still, not even now, I could avoid worrying. I realized that I would never stop worrying, it was part of me, and that wouldn't change. I would always be there, by Bella's side worrying about her, and now about our daughter. All the stress was worth it, if I had them both by my side for eternity.
Carlisle nodded, considering what she had said, too. The next thing he was going to ask got me one hundred percent focused on Bella's reactions. My eyes on her face.
"It seems like we did something right with the morphine this time. Tell me, what do you remember of the transformation process?"
Bella hesitated for an instant before answering, and that was enough to make me wonder what it was she was hiding. It was frustrating to realize now, that not even when our brains were more alike than before, I could listen to not even a whisper from her mind. I had been waiting for something to be unblocked. "Everything was... very dim before. I remember the baby couldn't breathe..."
As soon as her voice trailed off after remembering our baby, Renesmee, I knew what was coming. Bella turned to see me, her eyes full of fear.
"Renesmee is healthy and well." Something I saw in her eyes told me that she had believed what I told her. But it wasn't still time for us to talk about Nessie-Renesmee. "What do you remember after that?"
Her face didn't betray any emotion. "It's hard to remember. It was so dark before. And then... I opened my eyes and I could see everything."
"Amazing." Carlisle said.
As soon as Carlisle told that, I saw that Jasper felt something similar to shame ran through Bella. Why would it be shaming to Bella having said that or having heard Carlisle saying that?
There must be something more, we have to have more details. This is almost an exploit. Carlisle was thinking excitedly.
"I want you to think-to tell me everything you remember."
Bella didn't answer, and in her eyes was discomfort. She didn't want to talk about that, it was clear. Carlisle noticed, and his thoughts took on a different direction.
"Oh, I'm so sorry, Bella. Of course your thirst must be very uncomfortable. This conversation can wait."
Thirst. It was all I saw for a moment in Jasper's mind when he read that Bella was thirsty. Of course she was thirsty...
One of her hands flew toward her throat and she seemed to be caressing it, as if she could turn the fire off from outside.
I think it's time to hunt, Edward. Jasper was almost begging me. He would more relaxed when it when did it.
I dropped my hands from her waist, and only took one of her hands, I patted it. "Let's hunt, Bella."
Her eyes opened wide, full of shock. The same thing Jasper felt.
I remembered the conversation we had had, when Bella had asked me if that, seeing me hunting, would be something she would get to see: I had refused categorically, but I knew the curiosity had never left her. I grinned hugely to her, waiting for her to see that there was nothing to be worried about, not while I were there with her. "It's quite easy, love. Instinctual. Don't worry, I'll show you."
Bella didn't move at all, still too shocked to react. I smiled at her again and raised my eyebrows, almost waiting to dazzle her... "I was under the impression you'd always wanted to see me hunt." I reminded her.
She shakily laughed when she heard me, remembering, too maybe. Her hand was still on her throat. "Shall we?" I told her. I stretched my hand to take hers and caressed her throat. "I don't want you to be hurting."
"I'm fine. Wait. First."
"Yes?" Carlisle asked her, thinking that maybe there was something she wanted to say about...
"I want to see her. Renesmee."
Edward... I listened to Rosalie worrying.
Immediately, I could listen to every each thought of the minds of my family getting tensed hearing to Bella. Even Rosalie and Jacob. Renesmee was happy unaware that her mother had woken up finally, and that she wanted to see her as much as she wanted to, too.
Oh, dear. Edward, would it convenient? Esme worried quickly.
She will soon see her, Edward. But will be after hunting. Alice was telling me while she showed me a bit from the future.
Bella let go of my hand then, and they fell to her stomach, not flat and empty. There was no more baby, more Renesmee inside of her.
Carlisle talked to me in his mind and I turned to him.
Son, it's your decision. But I think it would be better for her if she weren't thirsty, don't you think? Nessie has human blood.
All of that I knew and I had considered it before.
"What?"
"Bella." I tried to tell her softly, in a comforting way. "That's not really a good idea. She's half human, love. Her heart beats, and blood runs in her veins. Until your thirst is positively under control..." I hated to have to tell her what was next. "You don't want to put her in danger, do you?"
Bella frowned when I was finished talking, I could imagine what she was thinking.
"Where is she?" she asked me, and her expression became focused. Trying to listen to her, surely.
If I could listen to her, so could she. Rosalie was with her and... that mongrel, too. I didn't feel the need of mentioning it, not yet.
"Is Rosalie with her?"
"Yes." I answered her, thinking that so was Jacob.
Without wanting to waste anymore time, the sooner we left, the sooner we would be back and Bella would see our daughter. I could visualize their meeting without needing Alice for it.
I took her hands from her stomach, and patted them lightly. Before she could say anything, Bella interrupted me. "Wait. What about Jacob? And Charlie? Tell me everything I missed. How long was I... unconscious?"
First what's first, right, Edward? She's got to feed...
"What's wrong?"
"Nothing is wrong." Carlisle was the one to answer her, deciding that it would be best if he explained to her. Besides, he had a better knowledge about almost everything than I had. "Nothing has changed much, actually-you were only unaware for just over two days. It was very fast, as these things go. Edward did an excellent job. Quite innovative-the venom injection straight to your heart was his idea." Carlisle stopped to smile at me and congratulate me again in his mind, but when he saw that it wasn't the moment to do that, he sighed and continued. "Jacob is still here, and Charlie still believes that you are sick. He thinks you're in Atlanta right now, undergoing tests at the CDC. We gave him a bad number, and he's frustrated. He's been speaking to Esme."
"I should call him..." Bella started saying and then her voice trailed off again. Perhaps she was thinking on how different her voice sounded like. Charlie would notice. "Hold on-Jacob is still here?" Bella noticed.
Carlisle and I interchanged another look. That's on you, son.
"Bella. There's much to discuss, but we should take care of you first. You have to be in pain..."
Thirst was again what was Jasper seeing, Bella swallowed in a convulsive way before continuing. She was still as stubborn as ever. "But Jacob-"
In gently interrupted her. "We have all the time in the world for explanations, love." I reminded her.
All the time you want, I thought to myself.
"Okay." Bella finally agreed.
Oh you're not getting away, Edward Cullen. Alice interrupted me, and she showed me what she was thinking. I had forgotten about that, or didn't want to remember.
"Wait, wait, wait." Alice stopped us, while she walked toward us. Jasper got tensed immediately when he saw Alice so close to Bella. "You promised I could be there the first time! What if you two run past something reflective?"
"Alice-"
"It will only take a second!" Alice interrupted me before leaving the room and brought the mirror.
I sighed. With Alice you never win, I better not even tried to stop her. It was impossible. I heard her running toward Rosalie's room and took the giant mirror, in comparison to her. It was bigger and wider, it covered her up completely.
The entire she was smiling, excited of what was coming next.
This is so exciting. Bella would see herself for the first time, I wonder what she would think...
"What is she talking about?" Bella asked.
I'm back, I'm back. Just a second, Edward. I heard you sighing. What's the rush? We have forever. Alice started babbling.
Jasper became nervous when he saw Alice walking between our family toward us with the mirror. He followed her carefully, always looking out for her.
Did he actually believe that I would allow anything to happen to Bella or Alice? His distrust was ridiculous.
Jasper's eyes didn't leave Bella's face, and I even felt the spasm of shock that ran through Bella when she saw Jasper's face fully.
Being human, Jasper's scars had been almost invisible to her eyes, so it was normal that she felt that way when seeing for the first time Jasper's face. For a human he was beautiful, but for us he was someone to be afraid of, seeing his face and his arms full of scars that only a vampire could leave marked on us, it only indicated that he had been in war, so it was normal that one tensed by seeing him.
Sure, Jasper thought, it's as if I were a new person...
Exactly, that was how Bella should see him. As if he were an entirely new person.
I felt Bella tensing, too, but for a completely different reason to Jasper's, and at the same time exactly the same one.
Danger.
Jasper saw and felt the change in Bella, from shock to caution. No one else was aware of the exchange between Bella and Jasper, but I could hear it all, and I was highly intent on each one of her movements.
Jasper smiled at Bella in an ironic way, for the situation.
It would seem we're both dangerous in this moment.
Alice was still intent on the future of Bella, searching for what would be her reaction that she hadn't noticed what was going on between our mates.
In her mind, she recalled the moment in which I had mentioned to her this detail, not having made sure that Bella saw herself in a mirror on our wedding.
"Edward gave me grief for not getting you to a mirror before the wedding." Alice explained to Bella, and her eyes went back to Alice. "I'm not going to be chewed out again."
I felt like laughing. Please! It hadn't been anything at all like that, or perhaps it would have been like that if Alice couldn't see the future and had saved me that step.
"Chewed out?" I raised an eyebrow.
Well, well. You know me, Edward.
"Maybe I'm overstating things." Alice told me while she turned the mirror toward Bella, who seemed to not be very aware of what was happening around her.
"And maybe this has solely to do with your own voyeuristic gratification."
Alice turned to see me, and winked. Of course, Edward. Hey! You do know me.
We all stayed silent while we looked at Bella seeing herself in front of the mirror, everyone was studying her reactions, it was me and maybe Alice, the only one who studied her closely.
This had been her dream since almost two years ago, and now she was seeing it fulfilled. She had always believed that she ordinarily average next to me. That I was some kind of Greek god and she was just a simply human girl with nothing to attract me or hold me by her side, of course, I had always known that she was beyond wrong.
For as much as I told her that she was beautiful, not only to my eyes but to a lot of more ones, though I didn't like to tell her that other ones found her beautiful, it was necessary that she realized all the attraction she exerted.
While I was thinking in all these things, the reasons Bella had to never doubt of her beauty, I listened to my family and of course, to Jasper.
The first reaction of Bella, was pleasure. It was a different pleasure than the one she had felt with me. I could almost hear what she was thinking of her new look.
I still couldn't believe that the image in the mirror caused her pleasure, when she had already owned the greatest beauty in this world that I could have ever seen touched this ground. Of course, with her human eyes she couldn't have been able to see what she actually was, what made me feel so especial when I had been chosen for her, not only for the incomparable beauty, but for her pureness, for her intelligence, for her good hear, for all what she was that seemed to have been created with my wished in mind.
Why didn't she see her beauty, without having had to get to this?
That's why it surprised me when her second reaction was horror.
Was she now going to tell that she was regretting it, that what she saw in the mirror didn't like it, that she wanted to leave everything and go back to be the same one from before?
Just thinking that it would be the first thing in my life that I wouldn't be able to give her, it caused me an immeasurable pain and sadness. This was all she had been being to me to give her and the only thing I had categorically refused to give her, and now she didn't want it, I found it difficult to understand it.
Her face didn't say anything, only Jasper and I knew what was going on through her.
Alice saw a second before it happened, the next thing that Bella would say, and I understood the reason for her fear.
"The eyes?" Bella whispered. "How long?"
I too got scared for a bit, Edward. I thought she wouldn't like her image, it's normal that her eyes... Alice kept talking alone in her mind.
I answered Bella myself. "They'll darken up in a few months. Animal blood dilutes the color more quickly than a diet of human blood. They'll turn amber first, and then gold."
"Months?" her voice came out louder than usual. Stress emanating in each one of the layers of her voice. Her eyebrows raised with surprise and incredulity, at least that was seemed to be what Jasper was feeling.
Uh-oh. Edward, be careful, please. Jasper warned me while he was taking a step forward.
The emotion that he felt emanating from Bella told him that there was a mistake coming in track, though I didn't see anything in Bella's face that told me the same thing.
Alice started looking in the future, and I with her. No one had answered the question of Bella, noting the change in the atmosphere after having heard her tone and the reaction of Bella.
I hope everything goes okay. Bella's doing it amazingly... Esme was begging internally.
On the other side, Emmett would rather have some fun for a bit. Let's see what you do without being able to read her mind.
How did he know I couldn't? Of course I couldn't, but I hadn't said anything about it. I felt a pang of frustration.
Alice was starting to see that Bella would make a mistake, when her eyes rose toward our faces. We listened to her taking a deep breath, and the future changed.
There was nothing to worry about.
"No, I'm fine." Bella said, her tone sounded sure, as if she were trying to calm us. Her eyes returned to the mirror. "It's just... a lot to take in."
Jasper frowned.
What! How is it possible...? Jasper was trying to understand Bella's behavior.
His emotion was clear, and then... how does she do it, Edward?
"I don't know." I answered to Jasper.
I saw Bella from another perspective frowning her forehead too when she listened to me answering, without having heard the question. "What question did I miss?"
Yes, explain, Edward. You know how I hate not knowing what you're talking about. Emmett complained.
I smiled hugely listening to Emmett. "Jasper wonders how you're doing it."
"Doing what?"
Yes, doing what? Emmett complained again. Always so impatient.
Jasper went over quickly a way to explain to Bella what he didn't understand. His years of expertise with neophytes made him the most expert on treating them, but he was confused with Bella's behavior. It wasn't simply the most normal.
Allow me to tell her myself, Edward. Please. I need to understand.
"Controlling your emotions, Bella." Jasper started explaining. "I've never seen a newborn do that-stop an emotion in its track that way. You were upset, but when you saw our concern, you reined it in, regained power over yourself. I was prepared to help, but you didn't need it."
I didn't bring the mirror to be discussing about her control...
"Is that wrong?" Bella asked, worried. I felt her body going rigid while she waited for Jasper or someone answered to her.
"No." Jasper answered, though his voice didn't sound sure at all.
No... I don't know... this is confusing. Maybe...
I caressed Bella's arm, trying to remind her that there was nothing to fear. "It's very impressive, Bella, but we don't understand it. We don't know how long it can hold."
Bella stayed quiet for a moment.
I was wondering what was going through her mind. Just like Jasper, I wanted to know what was that made her being so controlled, what was she was thinking in, what she felt...
But of course, not even now that she was a vampire like me, could I listen not even a whisper from her mind. All her secrets were still securely under key without access. I supposed that I would have to get used to an eternity of silence by her side. Not that I complain about. While she were with me, I could be still if it was necessary...
Alice, of course, had another idea in mind.
I didn't bring the mirror to be ignored. I need to know what she thinks. Had she liked the dress?
Well, something in favor to Alice, if Bella didn't like it I did.
"But what do you think?" Alice finally asked, while she was pointing to the mirror to leave clear what she meant.
"I'm not sure." Bella answered, she sounded more like she didn't want to answer honestly.
Her face returned to the mirror, and she looked at herself for a moment again.
Bella, Bella. Always the same, right?
My mind was still wondering what could possible be going on in her mind. And every time my frustration was getting larger.
Jasper felt the change, and guessed the reason. Frustrated about not being able to read her mind as you hoped for?
I didn't answer him, a little change in my lips gave him the answer.
A question that I had made to myself for a time ago came to my mind. Would her mental silence somehow continue to get more and more frustrating until I went mad? Or was there a limit that I would eventually reach?
Something her face made that Bella felt better, though I had no way of knowing what it was she had found. Maybe something familiar...
And then the pieces fell together. Her lips.
Bella raised a hand as if she wanted to make sure that the woman in the mirror was herself, and not a mirage.
Come on, come on. Alice was anxious.
Her hand touched her cheek.
I sighed, caught again in my own frustration. What are you thinking? I wanted to say, but before being able to say something, Bella got ahead.
"Disappointed?" Bella asked, her voice impatient for the answer.
I would have growled if I would have been thinking on the same thing she was, but instead of that I laughed. She was still unsure that for me, she was the most beautiful creature on this universe. "Yes." I honestly answered her.
Of course, it wasn't the same disappointment that she was concerned about.
Shock crossed her features when she heard my answer, something I expected.
Edward! Alice scolded me in her mind, and growled. I ignored her.
Just like I ignored Jasper when the face of Bella left the shock and passed to show pain. My silly Bella...
Careful, she could...
I had had enough of the careful, this was what we had been waiting for to leave behind the insecurities. I wanted to tell them to stop asking me to be careful, tell them out loud and to Bella, that I would rather turned into dust in her arms than being away from her.
That's why, they had to know. It should be pretty obvious.
Ignoring them, I leaned down to Bella and wrapped my arms around her waist, enjoying the electricity emanating from her body. I pressed my lips to her cheek before whispering into her ear. "I was rather hoping that I'd be able to hear your mind, now that it is more similar to my own. And here I am, as frustrated as ever, wondering what could possibly be going on inside your head."
The change was immediate. Her biggest fear hadn't changed. How was that possible?
He must be overflowing with happiness, my son. Esme was thinking happily.
"Oh, well. I guess my brain will never work right. At least I'm pretty."
Everybody laughed internally of Bella's comment. Though Jasper was still worried and waiting for us to get out of there so Bella would hunt something and her thirst were firmly under control. He was getting me nervous too.
Still, I ignored him. I growled in her ear to both comments. "Bella, you have never been merely pretty."
Edward, please. Could you take her hunting once and for all? We don't know how long she'd be controlled?
Damn! If it were for me, I would stay the same way for the rest of eternity, holding Bella in my arms and sighing in her ear, enjoying of the electricity that emanated from both of us, but my brother had another ideas.
I pulled away from her face, and sighed. It didn't make me happy to get away from her, even when I knew that I would be with here in our first hunting. "All right, all right."
It's necessary, Edward. Sorry.
"What?" Bella asked.
"You're making Jasper more edgy by the second. He may relaxed a little when you've hunted." I explained to her.
A wave of different sensations ran through me when I thought of Bella hunting, drinking the blood of animals from the woods or luckily some bear, she would be confronting them so she could feed. Seeing her that way would be so strange. I almost felt it getting on my nerves thinking of that. But Bella was as strong and durable as anyone of us were, I didn't have any reason to worry, although knowing that, didn't prevent me from doing it.
Bella turned to see Jasper to look at his expression, and it was enough to see his face to know that my words had been true.
Should we go with him? Esme wondered, I almost answered her before she considered asking me or Bella. No, they'd want to be alone...
"Okay. Let's hunt."
This time, I could imagine what Bella was thinking. She had always wanted to know if she would someday get to see me hunting, at that time I would have said a categorical negative, but now with her being a vampire too, there was no reason to not allow it.
Bella pulled my arms away from her waist to take one of my hands. Then she turned her back to the mirror, maybe with relief of doing it.
Excitement and nervousness ran through all my body at that moment.
Our first hunting together.
I really really hope you had loved it and please review... no matter if it's just one letter. Thank you to all those readers I can't write back thanking you.