"Mr. Callen, open your eyes and talk to us."
He shook his head refusing to open them.
"G, come on, man, stop this."
"I can't do this any more. Can't."
Sam got close to his ear again. "I saw you going through something when Hetty cut up that soap. Want to tell me about it?"
"Hell no, never." His eyes flew open. Callen started to stand.
Sam pushed him back down again. "Stay," he said, his voice soft and calm.
"Please Sam, don't make me talk about this. I need to go. I need… must hide. They'll find me and…."
"What will they do if they find you?"
He shuddered, flashes of memories bombarding his mind. "Make me, oh hell, I can't stop them."
"Make you do what, G?"
"Make me, please…." He closed his eyes and tightened them against the onslaught of more pictures flashing before his mind. "Suck their cocks. Damn it. I didn't want to do it. They made me. I couldn't stop them. They made me. Please, I'm sorry, I'll do what you want. Don't do that again. Please."
"Don't do what again?"
"Put… damn… she put…." He buried his face in his hands and started crying.
"G, I'm right here. You're safe. This is a memory. Remember?"
"That's a lie. The bitch put the soap in my mouth."
"Hetty?"
"Yes, she put the soap in my mouth because I wouldn't obey them."
"What?"
"You don't believe me? You think I'm lying, right? Go to hell!"
"I don't think you're lying about what happened back then. Right now, G, Hetty did not put the soap in your mouth."
"Bull shit she didn't! She did."
"Look at the dining room table right in front of you."
"I can't bear to even see her."
"It's Hetty."
"Liar!"
"G, listen to me, man, you're not thinking straight."
"So now I'm crazy, right, thought you'd say that."
"I'm not saying that. I'm asking you to look at this reality and see that Hetty didn't do that to you."
"She slapped me on the face."
"Didn't happen, man."
Callen's eyes flew open. He turned to Sam and tried to punch him.
Sam grabbed both of G's wrists and held them away from his face. "Look at what you're doing. Look at how you're acting. You're swearing and freaking out about this. You're acting as if we're abusing you like these people did to you." He felt him relax and released his wrists.
"It is to me. It's happening to me right now. I can't get away from that. It is real."
"Look at me, G. It did happen. It's not happening at this moment."
"Liar."
"Look at the table."
Callen glanced at the table for a moment. The sliver of soap lay on it in the same place Hetty had put it. "Damn it, I'm losing my mind. I swear she put it in my mouth."
"Tell me the FBI Agent's name, Mr. Callen."
He shivered. "Agent Myers," he said keeping his voice low. "Sorry Hetty, I'm losing it."
"You are doing just fine, Mr. Callen. I believe what Mr. Hanna said. You were in the throws of a memory and I inadvertently triggered it with the bar of soap."
"No."
"Really now—"
"No! You slapped me and that's what did it. You lied to me. You said you don't go around slapping agents."
"Mr. Callen, I did not slap you."
"What?" Callen's jaw dropped.
"Maybe I should have as you were over the top."
He nodded.
"I am glad you agree with me, Mr. Callen. Shall we continue?"
He swallowed hard, tears welling up in his eyes. "I… sorry."
"Apology accepted, shall we?"
"I don't know if I can say it, what she… they made me do."
"Take your time."
"They made me… damn it, made me suck their cocks whenever they needed it."
"Any time they wanted it, Mr. Callen?"
"Oh hell, yeah, any time."
"Anyone in the FBI?"
"And then some," he said lowering his voice.
"Who else, G?"
"Can't Eric go some place else?"
"Mr. Callen, Eric is harmless. Do not worry about him. Continue."
"My father."
"And?"
"Damn it, Hetty, must you press this?"
"Yes."
"I lied to you about something."
"Mr. Callen, I understand now why you lied. It does not make it right. However, under the circumstances any one of us here would have done the same thing. You were protecting yourself from what you thought might happen again. I do understand the need for protection. Do let me get this straight, Mr. Callen. You served no longer than a year at each organization?"
"Yeah."
"I see, okay then, we will need to some 'surgery,' for lack of a better word, on your files when this is finished."
"When what is finished? When you fire me? When you make me suck off everyone here too? Is that what you want me to do? Huh?"
"Whoa, Mr. Callen!" Hetty got to her feet. "I can see where this is going." She kneeled at his side and took his hands in hers. "Please accept my apologies for all the people who did this outrageous and horrible abuse."
"Sorry, Hetty, I'm a little gun shy."
"I would be too, Mr. Callen. Have we ever acted like those… them?"
"The drugs."
"I see. They were necessary only because we needed you to talk about what happened."
"Slapping me."
"Happened only once in the hospital."
"So I brought on it myself, sucking cocks?"
"Mr. Callen!" Hetty said, dropping his hands and standing up. "When have I ever asked you to suck someone's cock?"
He shuddered. It was her telling him to drive to the prison. Her drugging him just before they walked inside. Her tying him to the bed. Her using that hideous accoutrement in his mouth. Her inviting them into his father's prison cell.
She watched as his eyes changed into that faraway look of when he had memories. Another part of the memory was here again. "Mr. Callen," Hetty said, her voice soft and tender, "what are you seeing?"
"Her."
"What is she doing?"
"Too much."
"G, I'm here."
"I lied, damn it, I had to, Sam, sorry."
"About what, man?"
"The partner thing. I was the shittiest partner to her. Really. I wouldn't do what she wanted me to do."
"G, she wanted you to do horrible things. She was the shittiest partner."
"If you only knew."
"Knew what?"
"What horrible things I did."
"G, she's got your mind all messed up. You've got it turned around."
"Are you sure?"
"Yeah."
"She forced me to go with her to see my father. I didn't want to go. She said if I didn't she'd make me suck more cock."
"Man, I'm sorry, G."
"It sucked," he said, smirking afterward. "I know stupid joke. I told her okay. What could I say after all? So I went along with it. She made me drive there. Drugged me when we got there. She said it would make her time more enjoyable. I couldn't understand what that meant. Her time more enjoyable? She took my hand and guided me into to see my father. He hugged and kissed her while I stood there and watched in a stupor. I couldn't move really. I was just frozen in time and space. They made out on his cot. Made me watch. My father's cell mate was there watching too and leering at me. I shuddered when he gave me that lecherous look. He got off his top bunk and started stroking my sides, telling me how much he liked me and how much he wanted me. I couldn't move. I watched my father eye his cell mate. That's when things got scary."