Draco had been sitting on my bed for two days. I only barely coaxed him to eat, but he didn't move. When we arrived at my father's home, he admitted he wasn't ready to go to the Order just yet. I took him to my room, instead.

I knocked on the door with the sandwich on a plate. There was no reply, so I opened the door.

"I have a sandwich for you," I said quietly.

Draco didn't acknowledge my arrival.

I set the plate on my nightstand, before sitting beside him. "If you want to talk..."

There was no answer. I sighed quietly, "Mum and Dad wanted to see you, but I told them to leave you alone."

He just stared at his clasped hands that dangled from his knees. I touched his arm slightly, expecting him to draw away. But he didn't move. I rubbed his arm in what I hoped to be a comforting gesture.

"I wish things were different," I told him.

He nodded slowly and I gave him a small smile. "Come on, eat something. You haven't eaten all day."

I handed him the plate and he took the sandwich slowly. I watched as he ate it all and then took the plate. "Would you like another?"

He nodded.

"I'll be back," I told Draco.

I made my way to the kitchen, spotting my parents in the living room having tea. I made another sandwich, jumping when I saw Draco in the doorway as I turned around.

"Draco..." I looked him over. "Are you alright?"

"I'm fine," he said. He made his way over to me and I handed him the plate. He took the sandwich. "Thanks."

"Draco... how do you feel?"

He didn't answer until after he finished his sandwich. I took the dirty plate, putting it in the sink.

"I'm fine."

I threw the plate down, causing it to shatter, "No! You're not fine! You've been sitting in my room, sitting there and just... just staring at the wall, Draco! You're not fine! Don't lie to me! I want you to talk to me! I want you to tell me what's going on! I want you to tell me how you feel!"

Draco watched my outburst, "I'm... okay."

I relaxed, "That's better."

Draco sank down onto the kitchen stool, "I haven't really accepted it."

"I know," I said quietly.

The next thing I knew, he was looking at me with tears in his eyes. Draco Malfoy never cried.

"You don't have to be strong all the time," I told him. "You can punch some walls if you want," I offered.

He gave a shakey laugh, "I want to."

I gestured to the wall to my right, "All yours."

He sank back down on the stool. "I don't know what to do."

"You don't have to do anything," I told him. I touched his arm, "That's the glory of pain. We don't have to do anything. Because it'll always be there. We just decide how much it hurts."

As a tear spilled over, he looked away from me. "I hate being weak."

"You aren't," I promised. "No one can just... do what you did. She was like my second mother. I loved her too..."

"You haven't cried," Draco muttered.

"Because I'm more concerned about you," I admitted.

He jerked his arm and wiped his face. "When can we go to the Order?"

I kissed his cheek gently. He glanced at me and I cupped his face, using my thumb to wipe away a stray tear, "My father said as soon as you feel ready. They're informed of our intent...They know the reason. Nothing's guaranteed, especially Potter being nice. But I figure my mother on our side, he'll be fine."

He gave a small smirk to that, "Bet Potter's going to love this."

"He doesn't know, actually," I told him. "I figure a surprise will be best."

"Can we go tonight?"

I nodded, smiling brightly at him, "If you want to, sure."

He nodded, "It'll take my mind off things."

I kissed him gently, pulling away, "Alright. I'll go tell dad."

"Can I come with?"

"I'm not leaving you alone," I said simply. I took his hand and guided him to the living room. My mother looked up in surprise.

"Tonight, father," I told Professor Snape. "We'd like to go tonight."

My father regarded us with a blank expression before nodding, "Very well. Clean yourselves up... seperately. I'd like to leave in an hour."

"We'll be ready, sir," Draco said quietly.

I let Draco take a shower, as he needed one desperately. I had taken one only a few hours before. I fixed my hair, redid my make-up, and then brushed my teeth. Draco changed after he got out of the shower, and I ruffled his hair, smirking.

"It looks better messy," I told him.

"Too much like Potter," he muttered.

"You gotta be on familiar ground somehow," I smirked.

He protested to the messed up hair, but kept it in the end. "Ready?"

I fixed my red lipstick, before nodding, "Beautiful?"

"You know you are."

I smiled, "I know."

Glad that he was a little back to normal - though I knew it'd be a very long time before he actually was - I took his arm and led him down the stairs. My father and mother were dressed and ready to go as well. My mother took Draco with her as she apparated. My father and I were only a few seconds behind them.

I ran my hands across my skirt, flattening out a few wrinkles.

"Women," my father muttered.

I smirked, making sure my hair was perfect, before my mother knocked on the door.

The door opened and Mrs. Weasley greeted us. "Severus! Lily! Do come in! And Orpha, pleasant surprise-Mr. Malfoy?"

I took Draco's arm, "He's with me."

Her hand shook, but she opened the door, "Of course. Come in."

Draco and I exchanged a look, before I led him over the threshold.

"I'd like to ask for wands to be surrendered," I stated. "We'll give up ours if you give up yours."

Mrs. Weasley nodded, "A reasonable request. Come in, take a seat. The Order will be here soon."

I pulled Draco and myself to the far end of the table, farthest from the door.

I heard pounding steps on the stairs, "Is that Remus, Mum?" Weasel's voice called. "I've been meaning to ask him-" He stopped as he entered the dining room and spotted Draco and I. "You!"

"Ronald Weasley, put down your wand!"

I smirked at Weasel, his face turning red as his mother grabbed his wand from his hand. "They're here for Order business!" she scolded him. "Away. And tell the others to stay away."

"Why is Malfoy here, Mum?" he cried. "He's a Death Eater!"

I rolled my eyes, "I already told you he wasn't, Weasel. Do as your mother says and leave us."

So he did, in a furious scramble as he called up to Potter, "Malfoy's here, Harry! Mum's gone mental, I tell you!"

Mudblood Granger appeared next and took a seat a few seats away from Malfoy and I. I regarded her with indifference before turning back to Draco. "Just... be yourself... but not yourself."

He smirked, glancing at me, "Don't want me to scare them away?"

"I mean," I rolled my eyes, "Don't let them try to get to you. They're going to try to push your buttons. My father warned me earlier, but I forgot to tell you."

"Thanks for the advanced notice," he said with a hint of sarcasm.

I elbowed him, "Shut up."

Slowly, they filed in. Order members from Ireland, Scotland, Wales, and England alike. They all didn't seem surprised to see me. My mother sat beside Draco, giving him a comforting smile, but Draco was tense beside me.

"And if they kill me?" he whispered under his breath.

"They surrendered their wands," I told him. "No one's dying."

Mad-Eye Moody walked in and I watched him as he stared at us before clanging his staff against the stone floor. Draco cringed slightly at the sight, and I took his hand, giving it a gentle squeeze.

"This Order meeting begins," he gruffed out. "Snape, what's the meaning of this?"

"They came to me, wishing to join the Order," my father said coldly. "I hardly denied them."

They barely glanced at me, instead looking at Draco, "And boy, why do you want to join?"

Draco swallowed, visibly intimidated by the man that had turned him into a ferret just a few short years ago. "I can't do it, sir."

"Can't do what?"

Draco ducked his head for a moment, seeming to draw strength that way, before meetig Mad-Eye's eye, "Kill Dumbledore. Kill anyone, for that matter."

"He's gone soft," a croaky voice muttered.

I turned my head sharply to spot Mudungus Fletcher, scum bag of both sides. I grimaced at him, "Look who's talking. Fletcher, you haven't even bathed in months. How many bottles of cologne have you used to hide your scent?"

"Shut up, girl," he spat at me.

"Enough, Fletcher," Mad-Eye spat. He turned his attention to Draco. "And why not?"

"Do I have to have a reason to not kill anyone?" Draco questioned, his tone a bit stronger. "My father just killed my m- my mother two days ago. That's a pretty good reason to me."

Mad-Eye rolled his eyes, glancing at Albus Dumbledore as he strode through the doorway, "I once knew a boy, Draco, that made all the wrong choices," he said in his whimsical tone. "I'm glad to see you aren't turning into that boy, and instead making the right decisions."

Draco swallowed, "I've never wanted to be who my father shaped me, sir. I've always been.. been trying to find a way out. I couldn't find any until Orpha mentioned something about the Order."

I nodded, "I wanted out too. I knew that the Dark Lord would ask something of me I couldn't do. I'd rather die nobly than die a coward."

Draco nodded, "My mother was the only thing that was keeping me there. If I didn't kill Dumbledore by the end of the school year, and let the Death Eaters into the castle, he'd not only murder me, but my mother. I couldn't... now that she's gone, I can do what she wanted for me. What I want for myself."

"Very well... we'll deliberate."

Mrs. Weasley ushered us out of the dining room and into the kitchen. "Stay put," she instructed. "We shouldn't be long."

I nodded and was surprised when one of the twins came out of the room. "I'm to make sure no one kills you," he winked at us.

I nodded slowly, sitting on one of the kitchen stools. Draco sat beside me, his head falling into his hands. I knew he was tired, as he hadn't exactly slept in the last few days. I barely got any sleep watching him and making sure he wouldn't do anything stupid.

And we began our wait.

Review, everyone, please? And thanks to SlytherinBaby98 for the idea!

Read my disclaimer in the previous chapters... I don't feel like typing it again(: But I don't own, just the plot and Orpha

- Wynde