Chapter 21

Danny's POV:

Trudging along the deserted pathway in pursuit of Bruce and Ralphie-my two dogs-I tucked my chin behind the warm collar of my thick black coat and buried my stiff hands inside the deep pockets of it; hoping to ward off the nasty bite of cold that was trying relentlessly to attack me. The wind was picking up greatly and the icy weather had made an early appearance this year, making me reluctant to venture outside very often. But Ruthy and the dogs had both seemed desperate for an outdoor adventure; so I had been dragged along. On either side of the dirt path which I was trailing along, tall yellow grass stood up from the ground. It reached the height of my waist and trapped us inside the path in an odd straight maze. The ground beneath my feet had been made solid and firm with the cold and I could feel the frost radiating from it, pulsing out of the earth like blood away from the heart. My toes felt numb and I began to worry about Ruthy. She was only small so she would be more greatly affected by this harsh weather than I would.

Glancing around in a concerned search for her, I spotted the dogs trotting alongside each other with their heads stooped low as they sniffed at the old scents scattered across the earth with their tails sticking proudly up behind them. But I couldn't see Ruthy.

"Ruthy?" I called, slightly worried by her sudden disappearance. She had been at my side only moments ago. At the sound of my strained voice, Bruce and Ralphie both stopped in their tracks. They turned their heads towards me, their shiny animal eyes staring. Minutes passed by in silence. So with no comforting audible reply from my daughter, I turned instead to the two loyal dogs that were so eagerly awaiting my attention.

"Brucey, Ralphie, where's Ruthy? Go find her. Go find." I instructed them in a playful tone to get them excited about their task. The two dogs wagged their tails, eager to please, as they sprinted off and pinned their noses to the ground once more-this time in search for a different scent. I had taught them both this command when Ruthy had started walking. She had quickly developed a worrying talent for wandering off and not realising when she needed to come back. Ruthy seemed always lost in her own world-apparently something she had inherited from me according to Georgia.

I increased my speed to catch up to the dogs. Both of them seemed to be heading in the same general direction-to the left of where we were walking. I watched as the grass separated with loud rustles ahead of me where the dogs pushed themselves head-first through them and entered the endless tunnel of grass. My worries increased instantly at the sight of this. Why had she ventured away from the path?

Reaching the spot that the dogs had entered, I stretched my arms out in front of me and pushed the giant blades of grass to the side.

As time stretched on while I travelled through the yellow sea, I began to rush my movements. My arms thrust the grass aside roughly and my feet darted forward in a flurry of blurred movements. The whole time I called for Ruthy. But still there was no answer. As I extended my desperate hands to relentlessly brush aside the clutching plants, fear began to loom over me. I could feel its ice cold breath travel through the air and crawl across my skin with a sickening snigger echoing in the wind. Fear was mocking me; causing my heart to race and my body to react. I threw myself forward with more force than before. Where was Ruthy? Since the tragic death of Lola I had become increasingly protective of her. And this was making me worse.

When I finally broke through the last thick layers of foliage, I landed in a rough circular area that lacked any plants at all. Staring around anxiously, my gaze found Ruthy. She was sat cheerily on the floor, her legs crossed, with one hand patting Bruce-who had plopped himself down happily next to her on the dry ground and was panting heavily-while watching Ralphie wander aimlessly in circles a little way away. Her bouncing brown curls had flattened out slightly due to being whipped messily around her head in the wind-strewn lightly across her cheeks and forehead-and the skin on her tiny round face had gone pink in certain areas as a result of the harsh weather. Noticing that I was now stood near her, she gazed up at me with a vacant smile.

Releasing a heavy sigh of relief, I darted forward and scooped her up into my arms. Bruce-who had been contentedly resting against her-grunted quietly in protest of her movement. But I didn't glance back at him.

I simply held onto Ruthy and allowed myself to feel reassured by the warmth that was radiating from her touch like heat from the sun. She however, didn't reciprocate the gestures of affection that I was giving her. Ruthy had her delicate hands placed lightly on my shoulders but she did not clutch onto me or lean into the hug. After assuring myself that she was here and I had found her, I loosened my grip on her pixie-like body. She pushed her head away from me to stare up at my face with large inquisitive eyes.

"What's wrong daddy?" She pondered, staring at me with one thin brown eyebrow raised.

"I couldn't find you princess, don't do that again. What were you even doing?" I answered in a distressed tone.

"I was just playing daddy." She giggled. "But then I got colder so I sat down for a bit in my den. Oh! This is my den; do you like it daddy? I found it all on my own." She flung her arm out proudly and gestured around herself, indicating to the wide empty circle that we were stood in.

After permitting myself to have a swift glance at my surroundings, I returned my gaze to Ruthy with a stern expression. Instantly reading my face, she frowned.

"Are you angry with me daddy?" Her face fell and her blue eyes lost the usual sparkle that they held when she was excited.

"No I'm not angry. I'm just still a bit scared."

"But why are you still scared? You found me. You win!" She attempted a joke, as if this had all been a game. If that was the case then I had certainly not enjoyed this game.

"It doesn't matter now. Just promise never to do that again."

She replied with a firm nod of agreement so I set her down on the ground and called for Bruce and Ralphie. Then we began marching back through the maze of grass.

Swinging open the front door, I hurried into the house. Bruce and Ralphie scurried through my legs and ran inside towards the warm room with yips of appreciation for the protection from the wind. Ruthy then followed them. With everyone successfully through the door, I swiftly closed it to avoid losing the hot air that had greeted me when I walked inside.

Trudging over to the pegs on the wall, I peeled off my thick black coat and hung it up. The material of it was soft but freezing to the touch so I avoided placing my hands near it for fear of it infecting my now warming atmosphere. As I was about to search for Georgia, I felt a slight tug at the bottom of my thin navy jumper. Whipping my head around in confusion, my gaze fell upon my tiny daughter. She stood behind me with her bulky lilac scarf still wrapped firmly around her neck and one arm appearing to be stuck inside the sleeve of her rich purple coat. Underneath her coat, I observed, she was wearing a seemingly thick baby blue jumper. That would be why her coat wouldn't budge-her jumper sleeve was too big for it to glide over. Ruthy watched me with a sheepish but agitated expression. Her tiny mouth was in a pout and her eyebrows arched upwards.

With a fond chuckle, I crouched down in front of my daughter and proceeded to tug the coat off of her. The silky purple material required quite a bit of yanking but it eventually submitted to my persistent efforts. When I had the coat in my grasp, I discovered that it was ice cold-as mine had been-so I placed it hastily on another of the coat pegs. Then I returned to Ruthy to untangle her from her scarf. I snaked the wool around itself until Ruthy had been freed. With a grin, she threw her lanky arms briefly around my neck before releasing me and spinning on her heel; her curls soared out around her head in a wave with the sudden movement. Ruthy then bounced up the stairs towards her bedroom.

I began to walk towards the wooden archway to the kitchen before I heard Georgia's silky voice call me from the living room. With a grin, I turned around and strolled into the opposite room from my original goal.

Entering the room, I glanced around before I found Georgia. The curtains were fully open, in an attempt at allowing sunlight to flood the room. But because of the dismal weather that was cloaking London today, only a pathetic slither of light was able to feebly clamber in through the window. The light on the centre of the ceiling wasn't switched on so the sections of the room that were unreachable by the sunlight remained dim and foreboding. Hearing the faint crackling sound that was produced only by flames licking wood caused me to turn my eyes to the fireplace. A small fire had been lit and was glowing with burning heat in that area. Across from this fire was where Georgia sat on the couch. Looking at her, I realised that I hadn't detected the worry in her voice earlier. But it was evident on her face. Her brow was creased slightly. Her eyebrows were knotted together above her eyes and she wore a deep set frown. But it wasn't the frown that she gave me when I had done something wrong that upset or annoyed her. It was a frown of pure worry. The concern projected off of her face and latched onto my skin for my mind to absorb.

I hurried to her side with the thoughts of only another tragedy driving me. Georgia watched me approach with the frown not surrendering its position on her face like it usually did. As I sat down next to her, I grasped her hand firmly in my own.

"What's wrong?" I asked almost desperately. She was usually made happy by my appearance-especially after not seeing me for most of the day. But instead of answering or smiling at me, she leant forward to pick up a letter from the coffee table in front of us and placed the white envelope in my free hand.

At first it lay limply in my weak hand as I stared perplexedly at it. But then my fingers closed hesitantly around it. The last time that I had received a letter it had not been for a good reason. And Georgia's reaction to this particular piece of paper wasn't encouraging. Reluctantly, I turned the envelope over and slid the paper out of its transport.

I was partly aware of Georgia watching me as I skimmed over the scrawled words on the page with my blue eyes. That was the only reason that I contained myself-even though I was growing more infuriated after devouring each word. Disgusted, I threw the letter back onto the table and allowed my head to drop into my hands. Why wouldn't he leave me alone? Georgia placed a delicate and comforting hand on my back as she leant into me.

"When did he first contact you?" Her soft voice travelled down my ear.

"He sent me a letter just after Harry and Izzy went into hospital." I mumbled in response. Suddenly, both my body and mind felt completely drained.

"Why didn't you tell me?"

"I thought that if I said no then he wouldn't push it. So I figured that it wasn't worth concerning anyone else with-especially since Harry and Izzy were in hospital at the time. I didn't want to add any unnecessary problems."

There was a long pause in which silence had a chance to creep up on us and work its cruel magic; eating up any comfortable feelings and dampening our spirits.

"Well he is your dad, maybe you should meet up with him." Even without a single glance at her, I knew the look on her face. Uncertainty and reluctance filled her tone. She knew almost as well as I did that I couldn't possibly go to meet my father; even after he had sent this second letter insisting upon it.

"No." I answered firmly. "I can't."

Dougie's POV:

Not knowing what to do with myself, I strolled along the upstairs hallway with no particular thoughts in my head. The wind outside continuously launched itself at the window at the end of the hallway in a desperate attempt at breaking through the glass and infecting our warm home with its poisonous cold air. I paid little attention to anything else except from that disturbing sound and the smiling faces of the people in the photographs that lined the hall. The photos were varied equally between pictures of mine or Lara's family and the band. The photos that contained the cheerful faces of the band went from earliest to most recent as they moved along the wall. Each photo was able to stir strong emotions of happiness and fond memories-very different from the present situation. Since Lola's death, everything had changed. Harry would hardly ever answer his phone or spend time with us. Even though we respected that he needs time, we couldn't help but miss him. And Izzy seemed to be avoiding Giovanna more than everyone else-probably because she would soon have her baby and it would provoke devastating memories in Izzy's ever torturing mind.

The sound of mumbling voices echoed from McCauley's bedroom and caught my attention. So I walked over to McCauley's room and stood in the doorway. There I saw Lara sitting comfortably on McCauley's bed while she read from one of our son's books. McCauley was lying across his fluffy black rug on the floor, playing with his toys, as he listened distantly to Lara's soft reading.

With a faint smile, I entered the room and crossed the floor to Lara's side. McCauley noticed me moving past so he grinned up at me. After pulling a face in response to him, I seated myself beside Lara. As I shifted myself closer to her, a distant smile crawled up her face.

"Hello you." I mumbled, snaking my arm around her waist and placing my hand delicately there.

"Shh I'm reading." She muttered with a grin in between reading out the lines of the book.

Rolling my eyes, I rested my head on top of hers and waited for her to finish. Her voice was rather soothing so my eyelids soon dropped down. The lack of sleep that I had been suffering from recently had not been kind to me so I was grateful for this. The warmth from her body pressed beside mine began to infiltrate the layers of my own skin and heat me up. And the peaceful mood that filled the air of the room soon infected me as much as Lara's body-heat had done. Then I became less aware of my surroundings with every second that rolled by.

I must have fallen asleep because I was suddenly wrenched into conscious thinking once more. Staring around in confusion, I found myself in a dark room.

It took me a while to figure out that I was still in McCauley's room and still on his bed. But now the sun had set outside and the stars were partly visible through the clear window. As I still felt disoriented, I didn't process the fact that there was another body beside me in the dark until I felt a hand glide tenderly across my hair. Glancing upwards, I saw the faint shape of two people lying with me. One of them, a long shape with flowing hair, was clearly Lara. And the other, a tiny body with short spiky hair, was McCauley. McCauley was burrowed into my right side. Lara lay on his other side so that McCauley was pressed snugly between us both; he had at some point changed into his red dragon pyjamas and was clutching-as always-his dinosaur teddy. I smiled absently down at him before looking over at Lara. It had been her hand running over my hair and it now rested above my head; her fingers gently flicking the tips of my hair. She grinned when she saw my open eyes.

"Why did you let me sleep here?" I whispered with a smile.

"Because when I went to the bathroom, McCauley got himself changed and crawled into bed next to you. He was asleep and snuggled up to you and you both looked so comfy so I thought I'd leave you. But then I got lonely and now we're all here." She smiled for a second before her expression changed dramatically. It was as if her facial features had previously been held up by strings but now those strings had been suddenly cut, making her smile descend into a frown and her eyebrows drop with concern. Even her deep brown eyes seemed affected.

"I was also worried about waking you up in case you couldn't get back to sleep later. I know you haven't been sleeping well."

"Oh you shouldn't worry about that. I can deal with it." I smiled weakly and secured one of her soft hands in mine.

"Are you alright Doug?"

"Me? I'm fine."

Lara moved her hand away from my hair and instead placed it gently on my cheek.

"Don't lie to me. I know what happened with Lola has affected you."

"You don't need to worry. I won't end up as bad as...last time." I muttered reluctantly. My depression was a touchy topic for both Lara and I. Although she hadn't been in my life at that time, she still worried about it. So whenever my mood seemed to drop into a downwards spiral-especially after a big event-she would start to worry relentlessly.

"What about Harry and Izzy? Are they doing any better now?" Lara asked with a hint of suspicion remaining on her dimly lit features. I hadn't managed to persuade her that I was alright. But I wasn't going to go back to that topic.

"They're not at their best but they're coming along. Harry actually answered his text from me this morning so I suppose they're making slow progress."

We spent the next few minutes in silence. The darkness seemed to shroud us from one another even more than it had before; separating us.

"Do you think we should still have the wedding this year?" She asked suddenly in a whisper.

"Of course I do. Why?"

"Everyone's just a bit...sensitive still so I'm just thinking that maybe a wedding isn't the best thing." She muttered sadly.

"No it'll be fine. If anything it will make everyone happier. Weddings are causes for celebration you know."

"What. Really?" She smirked.

I am really so sorry about the lateness xS I have the problem of knowingwhat is coming next but nothow to get to it. It's a real problem :/ So I need you to request things that you want me to write about again so that I will have more filler chapters. Just don't ask for stuff like Dougie and Lara's wedding or Tom and Gi's baby because they're obviously some of the main plot points that I need to lead up to x) I also was thinking about writing a prequel to this-not now but when I've finished this fanfiction. It would basically be about my own version of McFly's lives with their girlfriends before they all had children and stuff. So I need you to tell me what you think of that before I decide on whether to do it or not.

Side note and stupid question but-who's in love with Love Is On The Radio? Because I am! ARRRRRNEDJWNJC HJEWBFJFBEW

Please review x