NEW!

THIS IS MY SKIN

(and it's thick. this is not your skin - yet you are still under it.)

everyone wants to be the sun

to lighten up everyone's life

but why not be the moon

to brighten in the darkest hour

- 21 -

This time, Harley didn't even bother packing anything more than a carry on bag, not wanting to waste time having to wait around collecting her luggage. The sense of urgency stormed like the ocean within her, refusing to abate. She cursed herself for ever thinking that she had the control over what Tommy should do with his life, acting like damn martyr to a cause that wasn't even real. She loved him! She loved him! If only he would forgive her, take her back and she would never leave him again.

"Here, I found something! Your mum was born over there, right?" called Holly from the kitchen where she was reading through all the immigration pages she could find. Harley had gotten her new application for a visa waiver approved which was all she cared about but Holly was thinking ahead. She didn't doubt that Tommy would take her back but Harley wasn't so sure - she just wanted to have her chance to tell him the truth.

"Yeah, she moved here when she was a teenager."

"Ooh, that's good! It says here you can apply for citizenship if you have a US citizen for a parent at the time of birth and they lived in US for at least five years!" Holly could hardly contain her excitement but Harley wasn't ready to give up her hopes yet. Just one thing at a time, she told herself.

"How about I first see if Tommy wants to see me again, then we can talk about citizenships or whatever." Holly tutted at her friend's lack of enthusiasm but kept researching.

Meanwhile, Harley was rooting around in her desk for the envelope of dollars she'd had leftover from her last trip and stuffed them into her purse. Her heart was pounding, her hands shaking but she refused to lose her nerve. Her love for that gruff man had knotted itself into every aspect of who she was, it wasn't something she could ignore any longer. In her arrogance, she had pushed him away but nothing could sever the bond they had, not even her own stupidity. At least, that's what she hoped for.

Maybe Tommy had moved on, maybe he was thankful that she had decided to leave. Perhaps he had realised in the space she had forced upon him that she was right, he did have the chance at a better life without her around. The very thought made her eyes well up so she quickly cast it away. There was no point thinking the worst until she had spoken to him, face to face. Until then, she would remain hopeful.

The doorbell made her jump but she heard Holly scrape back her chair, so she continued to charge around her room, grabbing socks and underwear, trying to find a clean pair of pyjamas.

"Have you booked your flight already?" Holly called up to her as she passed the stairs.

"Nah, I don't want to be put on hold for an hour. I'll just get on the next one I can when I get there," she replied before running into the bathroom to sweep whatever was on the shelf into arms so she could chuck it on the bed. Anything that counted as a liquid she did not have time for and discarded it straight away. The length of the flight was going to be hard enough without holding herself up at the gate because of perfume.

"Hey, Harley? I don't think you're going to need to worry about that flight."

Harley rolled her eyes impatiently, hoping her friend hadn't 'helpfully' booked her onto a flight by accident. With her luck, she'd end up in a different state. With an agitated sigh, she hurried the stairs to see what Holly was going on about this time.

"What are you talking ab-"

Holly was stood in the front hall, her face lit up with pure excitement, and beside her was a man she had never expected to see under her roof.

"Tommy?"

It wasn't until the plane took off that Tommy had a moment to think about what he was doing, and he was glad for it. He'd been worried that he would talk himself out of it if given the chance so he had got his things, booked a flight and got on the plane as quickly as possible, with Brendan sending him encouraging texts along the way.

Now, with over eleven hours ahead of him, he could relax: he was on his way. The city below lit up like fireflies under the night sky, getting smaller and smaller until all he could see was grey and purple clouds. It would be morning in his time when he touched down but afternoon in London, so he knew he should get some sleep to avoid being jetlagged but his mind was racing.

He hadn't told Colt that he was leaving, knowing that the manager would have freaked out this close to the tryouts and that was time he didn't have to waste. He hadn't told his Pop either but he probably wouldn't even know he was gone, which he felt almost sad about. The only other person who knew he was leaving was his landlord who he had just texted in case he came round while he was away.

This kind of spontaneity wasn't something he was used to. Impulsive choices made because out of anger, sure, but not hopping on a plane to track down the woman he loved who had very clearly told him to not do that. Well, he supposed, she could tell him again to his face if that's how she really felt - which, he admitted, was a possibility. He could be flying halfway around the world just to get rejected again but he had to try. He owed it to them and that time they had spent together to at least try.

Brendan had given him something else on his way out but Tommy wasn't so sure. There was being spontaneous and there was being unrealistic. He didn't want Harley to feel pressured or guilted into anything, he just had to know if there was a chance that they could make this work. They could figure out the specifics later.

With his thoughts in the clouds, the journey went by quicker than expected and before he knew it, they were touching down. The clouds were grey but the sun was shining and as the Captain welcomed the passengers to London, it hit him that he was really here. Now he just had to find her house.

Luckily, Harley had left copies of her travel documents from her first flight back at the apartment which included her home address. Ignoring how damn creepy he felt, he had searched for her house on Google Maps so he knew what it looked like and then had tucked the paper into his wallet. Now, he showed it to the taxi driver at the airport who nodded and told him to climb in. It took about an hour to reach her street and as he paid the driver, the man helpfully pointed at the house he wanted.

"Good luck, mate," he said with a wink and drove off, leaving Tommy bemused, and as he stare up at the front door, a little scared. He wasn't sure how long he stayed stuck in the spot until he heard his niece's voice in his head.

Well, go get her!

His hands shook a little from the adrenaline so after he had rung the bell, he stuffed them into his jean pockets. His reflection was staring back at him through the opaque glass panelling and he wondered whether he should have freshened up first but then the door opened, revealing a tall redhead with vivid blue eyes.

"Hi there," she greeted, looking him up and down expectantly.

"Hey, er, does Harley Sinclair live here?" He prayed she would say yes because otherwise he would start having to go to every door like a madman or, you know, a salesman. For a very awkward minute, the woman just stared at him with wide eyes, then she gawked.

"Oh my God, you're him aren't you? You're Tommy?" she exclaimed, her voice low. Before he could respond she grabbed his onto his jacket and dragged him unceremoniously into the hallway. His first reflex was to resist but the fact that she knew him was a good sign and she seemed more excited than dangerous.

"Yeah, I'm-" he started but the redhead shushed him, sneaking a look over her shoulder towards some stairs. His heart began to race - was she here?

"I can't believe you're here, this is so crazy! I knew it though, I knew it!" Tommy was half amused, half wary of the woman's enthusiasm. With far too much familiarity, she threw her arms around his shoulders, squealing a little in his ear. Tommy tensed but she didn't seem to notice.

"I'm Holly by the way, her best friend. The moment she told me about you, I told her she had to go see you - but here you are!" Okay, he liked this girl no matter how overly tactile she was.

"Is she here?" he asked, desperate to see her. Instead of replying, Holly turned to yell up the stairs. Tommy heard movement and then footsteps on the stairs. He had goosebumps, everything inside of him vibrating as he waited to see her, and -

There she was. The afternoon sun from the skylight haloed her from behind, her wild hair spilling down her shoulders, green eyes downcast as she hurried down the steps. He saw Holly turn to him out of the corner of his eye with a wide grin but he couldn't tear his gaze away from the woman he loved, descending like a dream made manifest.

When she saw him, she stopped in her tracks. He couldn't help but smile as she said his name, the green of her eyes more beautiful than he remembered.

"Hey, baby," he said, and then she was there in his arms, shivering like a leaf as she buried her face into his neck. He noticed Holly slip quietly into the kitchen to give them some space and he mouthed thank you as she left.

"You're here," Harley whispered into his chest and Tommy gently pulled her back so that he could look at her, his thumb wiping at her tears.

"Yeah, I'm here." She looked dazed almost, like she didn't quite believe what was happening.

"But… why?" Tommy laughed and was surprised at himself.

"Why else? I love you, baby. I know you told me you didn't want me to come with you but-" He was abruptly cut off when Harley slapped her hand over his mouth, something vulnerable in the seagreen of her eyes, the curve of her lips.

"I was coming back to you, I was just about to leave! Jesus, Tommy, I wish I could take that back, fuck, I wish I had never said that. I thought that by letting you go you would be free to live this…" she gestured wildly with her hand, "happy life. Everything was going so well for you, I didn't want to ruin it."

He couldn't help it: he laughed again. The ridiculousness of it all, of them. Trust them to be given something so precious, so good, and be so damn terrified of it. In the midst of their grief they had found happiness - and ran from it.

"I had a happy life because of you, ya silly woman," Tommy scolded and Harley smiled for the first time, still a bit teary.

"I had a happy life because of you, too," she whispered, seeming very young in that moment. She was scared, it was easy for him to see and he was determined to prove that there was nothing for them to be scared of, not when they were together.

It was then that he remembered Brendan's last minute addition, that little glint in his eye as he'd slid it in the Tommy's coat pocket. Tommy had thought that the timing was wrong, had been afraid of pushing her away further but now, holding her in his arms, damn near screaming with joy, he knew that it was now or never. So, without further ado, he slid out the velvet box and got down on one knee.

"Oh my God," Harley murmured, and he heard Holly swear from the kitchen where she was peering out from around the corner. There was a million reasons whirling around his head why this was the wrong thing to do but then he saw the way she lit up like the northern star and decided they didn't matter.

"Harley Sinclair, will you do the honour of being my wife?"

Harley couldn't believe it. She wanted to pinch herself to make sure she wasn't dreaming because that's what it felt like. Tommy, turning up on her door to propose to her after she told him to not come after her? This was the soppy sort of shit she would imagine as she lay in bed, cursing her ability to fuck up every good thing that came her way.

"Really?" she asked before she even knew the words were coming out. She cringed but Tommy just laughed - my god, she had never heard him laugh so much or seen him so jovial - unphased by her response.

"Yes, baby, really."

"But you're not worried that it's too soon? We've only known each other for three months!" He shrugged and she had to admit, she was liking this side to him.

"It's enough. We've been through hell t'gether, baby. What more do we need to do to prove that we're meant to be together?"

What more, indeed. When it felt like her world had collapsed, Tommy had been the one to help her put it back together again. He had given her his secrets to safeguard and she had walked him through his darkest of nights. Their time apart had been agonising, the ghost pain of something she had thought forever lost, but here he was, kneeling before her like she was the sun and the moon and all the stars, wanting her to share his life. There was good in this world, she thought, and you had to hold on to it.

"Yes!" she cried and and offered him her hand. The ring was beautiful, a warm gold leaf band with a large inset diamond that had her heart racing, and it slid on like it had been made for her. Harley jumped into Tommy's arms as he came to a stand, wrapping her legs around his waist and kissed him with all the desire, joy and devotion she felt for the man. Her man. Her fiancé.

"Oh, this is so romantic!" Holly crowed from the doorway, clapping her hands together as the engaged couple kissed and laughed and cried together.

"This is crazy, right?" Harley said in his ear, sounding breathless. Tommy spun her around and kissed her again.

"The craziest."

The quote for this chapter is by... well, in all honesty, I don't know. I googled and googled but couldn't find the original author. Sorry!

We're nearly finished, guys! The next chapter is the penultimate one, but it's a pretty hefty chapter to get through everything. Please let me know what you think!

xo