Chapter 21
Colliding Worlds!
"Holy crap!" Harry exclaimed uncharacteristically. "It's a girl version of me!"
"Goodness!" the girl-Harry gasped, peering at her alter-self. "It's a bloke version of me!"
She stood a little shorter than Harry, but taller than Hermione. Harry guessed that she was at least 5' 6". She had the exact same messy hair like he did, except hers was down to her shoulders and looked a hell of a lot nicer than his. She also had the same green eyes as Harry did, but hers were much more almond shaped and wide. She had a slender oval face – taking the trait from Lily of course – and a cute button nose. Her bowtie lips looked as if they were naturally pink, but darker somehow. She wore witch's robes, which did nothing but flatter her toned and athletic body. Judging by the amount of sinful curves she had, Harry deduced that she was Gryffindor's Seeker in her world. Her toned skin was very pale and fair.
"I can't believe my portal worked!" Hermione cried happily. "Granted, I didn't expect this but -"
"I can't believe you've brought another Potter here!" Harry shouted.
"I can't believe it's not butter!" Sirius yelled, holding a tub of the margarine with the same name.
Everyone stared at him.
"Aren't you supposed to be at work?" Harry asked.
"Aren't you supposed to be dead?" Hermione and the girl-Harry asked afterwards.
Sirius slapped his forehead, which was hilarious because the hand he used held the tub of margarine.
"Bloody hell!" he gasped. "You're right! What am I doing here? See you later Harry, suspiciously older Hermione who should be at school and Harry's highly attractive long-lost twin sister!"
He apparated away, leaving a group of people wondering if their Sirius would have been like that if he hadn't gone to Azkaban. Perhaps going to prison really was good for him…
The girl stood up and brushed herself off, glaring daggers at Hermione all the while.
"What?" Hermione finally asked after ten minutes under scrutiny.
"How do I know that this was your idea?" the girl asked sourly. "If you're anything like my Hermione then this is all your fault!"
"I didn't mean to bring you out of your world!" Hermione pleaded. "I wanted a rock, or a bush, honestly!"
Meanwhile, Harry watched as the portal turned fluorescent blue and started to flash.
"Uh, ladies…"
"You're just lucky I defeated Voldemort Hermione cause I swear to God…!"
The portal began to undulate spastically and Harry began to back away slowly.
"Don't you think you should…"
"You beat him?" Hermione asked excitedly. "Did you destroy all of the horcruxes first?"
The portal ejected another figure out, one who was clothed in a skin tight blue outfit that glowed in some parts. It was definitely a young girl, since the deliciously round bum was anything to say about it and she had shoulder length red hair.
"Hermione, you really should -"
"Of course I did!" Fem-Harry said. "It was fairly easy fighting Tom afterwards."
"That's wonderful!" Hermione exclaimed, overjoyed. "You just have to tell us how you did it!"
The portal now turned gold and Harry helped the pretty red head up as they silently watched it spit out another female. She was older, maybe in her twenties. She had light blond hair that was swept to the right side of her face and a wild ponytail hung over her left shoulder.
She wore a loose fitting white blouse with a blue and yellow collar. She had an armored plate on her right shoulder that had a thin red cape attached to it at the back. She also had very short shorts that were beige in color, not even halfway down her thighs in length. She wore a dark red skirt over those. Attached to her right leg at the back of her thigh was a large holster that held a strange looking machine gun.
Harry helped the extremely attractive woman – confused, extremely attractive woman – up and just motioned for her to stay silent for the moment as the portal changed again.
This time it turned a soft blue and grew slightly bigger. A man with short blond hair and European looks fell out. He looked Japanese, but his face and features were totally European. He wore a full set of blue samurai armor and had a set of devil horns on a band around his forehead. He also had a massive blue katana broadsword and an equally large orange dual edged broadsword attached to his back.
Seeing the lineup of odd characters, he just shrugged and joined them as they watched the portal some more.
Hermione still hadn't noticed the portal or the newcomers and she and the Fem-Harry – now known as Alessandra – continued trading stories.
The portal changed to a bright green and shat out a tall man with huge defined muscles and crazy black hair that stuck up at odd angles. He wore an orange outfit that was form fitting but baggy. The shirt had a white circle with a black Japanese symbol on it. He looked around curiously.
"This is definitely not what I asked Shenmue for," he said in confusion. He sat on the grass and started to meditate.
"OH MY GOD!"
Hermione finally noticed their guests. She jabbed her wand hysterically at the portal and cried, "Finite!"
The portal let out a rude noise – that sounded very much like a raspberry – and with a wet squelch that reminded everyone of a wet log it disappeared.
Hermione began to hyperventilate once seeing her handiwork. "Omigod, omigod, omigod!" she repeated over and over again.
"Hermione?" the cute little red head asked.
Hermione looked at the girl, recognition dawning in her chocolate orbs. "Shelke?" she whispered.
Both girls ran forward in a totally clichéd reunion scene and embraced eachother. A little too friendly in Harry's opinion. And was Hermione grabbing the girl's ass? No, definitely not, Hermione was supposedly in love with him! … Right?
"I thought I'd never see you again!" Hermione cried happily as she hugged the girl tightly, tears splashing onto the girl's tight, tight suit.
"It's so good to see you, I've missed you!" the girl named Shelke said with a warm smile.
Harry realized that this was the girl Hermione had met on one of her travels. Although they were a little too close for comfort. He decided to step up.
"Hi there, I'm Harry Potter," he said, shaking her hand.
"Shelke," she said shyly. Turning to Hermione she whispered, "Wow, you were right, he is a sight to behold!"
Hermione flushed but luckily she was saved by the others.
"Well, I don't know what I'm doing here but I'm Goku!" said the guy on the grass.
"Lightning," the beautiful woman said shortly.
"Ehh, I suppose you can call me Soki," the guy with the big swords said. He shook Harry's hand with a large grin. He then looked confused. "Ehh, what? How am I speaking this Western language?" he asked in surprise, clutching his throat.
"Yes, same here," Lightning said quietly, her intelligent eyes taking everything in. "Is it some kind of magic?"
Hermione thought… thoughtfully. "It would appear so," she said after a moment. "What languages do you normally speak?"
"Japanese," Soki said.
"Same," said Lightning.
"That's weird," Harry said. "Maybe your portal did something Hermione? Like a language barrier or something just in case?"
"I never spelled that into it," Hermione frowned. "Oh well, it's not doing any harm and it's more helpful to us so let's just leave it, hmm?"
"So you brought us all here?" the man named Goku asked curiously. He got up and started pacing around Hermione, poking her in odd places. "Did you use your planet's Dragonballs?"
"Dragon what?" Hermione asked. Goku cocked his head sideways.
"You know, the seven Dragonballs that summon a magical dragon that grants you a wish?" Goku asked incredulously. "You don't know that?"
"… No?" Hermione ventured. "I just created a spell."
Goku's eyes widened. "You can do magic like the dragons?" he sputtered.
"What dragons?" Hermione asked sourly. "The dragons I know are magic-resistant and very dangerous."
"Tell me about it," Harry muttered, reminiscing about a black dragon in his fourth year. He decided to forestall any argument and stepped in between the two. "Listen, since you're already here thanks to Hermione, and since you probably can't go back to your worlds until she makes up a new spell, what say you to helping us?"
"Ehh, sure," Soki said, scratching the back of his neck. "You got Genma here too?"
"What's a Genma?" Harry asked.
Soki shrugged. "Demons," he said. "Very nasty bastards, and ugly too. I was in the middle of a war when I got pulled here."
"And I as well," Lightning said dryly, giving Hermione a pointed look.
"I'm sorry!" Hermione huffed.
"So these Genma are demons right," Soki continued, walking around. "Some resemble undead skeletons, others like four legged skeletons and really nasty ones are huge and powerful. Only the blade of a Yagyu or Oni can kill a Genma, and I'm an Onimusha."
"What's the difference between an Oni and Onimusha?" Hermione asked, her eyes alight with the chance to learn something.
Soki laughed and placed both hands behind his neck. "Well an Oni is a warrior, born of a different type of demon, an ogre," he said. "Supposedly. They can kill Genma. An Onimusha is a sort of ascended Oni, who is capable of wielding the terrible power of the ogre. Once an Oni warrior turns into an Onimusha, he is in a 'powered up' state, you can imagine."
"That sounds a lot like a Saiyan," Goku said, entering the conversation. "I'm a Saiyan. We come from the planet Vegeta and we're born warriors. We're naturally powerful and once we get strong enough, we become Super Saiyans, much like this Onimusha you're talking about."
Hermione's jaw hung loosely. "You're an alien?" she gasped. "Amazing!"
Goku nodded sagely. "I didn't even know I was an Saiyan until I was much older," he said. "The planet I lived on was attacked by a group of Saiyans and they told me who I was. The rest after that is history. Hey, do you have any food?"
Soki's eyes lit up. "Ooh, do you have any simmered Taro?" he asked excitedly.
"I'm hungry too," Lightning said. "Being pulled through dimensions would do that I suppose."
Shelke looked at Hermione. "Yes, do you think we could get something to eat?" she asked. "I'm pretty hungry as well."
"We'll go to the Three Broomsticks," Harry said, slapping his fist into his palm. "Just let me make some portkeys."
"What's a portkey?" Soki asked. "Is it magic?"
"Yes," Hermione said. "A portkey is something that will allow you to travel anywhere in the world instantly."
"It's somewhat nauseating however," Harry said dryly, casting Portus on a few rocks. "Okay, everyone put a finger on the rocks I give you and we're off!"
As the odd party of super what-nots were portkeyed away, the backyard was left in relative peace at last. A rustle in the bushes signaled the end of the short-lived tranquility and two people came out and surveyed the area. One was a tall man and the other a beautiful young girl, as are all the females in this story. Actually, wait, Umbridge doesn't count okay?
"So that's how we came here?" the male person asked quietly. He shifted his weight since the sword on his back was quite heavy.
"I think so," the girl said worriedly. "Come on Cloud, let's go find that broomstore they were talking about!"
Harry and his new inter-dimensional group arrived outside the Three Broomsticks, with Soki toppling over as he landed.
"Never again!" he gasped, clutching his stomach. "That's worse than a Genma portal!"
"Come on, let's go in!" Harry urged. "It's a Hogsmeade weekend so we'd better get a good table before the students come and get them all!"
"Students?" Goku asked. "People who use magic like you?"
"Correct."
"Well, let's go get a table then!" Goku said cheerfully, grasping the door handle. "I'm starving, hope you got a heavy wallet!"
He made to open the door and neatly tore it off its hinges. Ok, I lied, he took the hinges and half the door frame with it.
Harry and the others were still gawping at him when Rosemerta came out, wondering why there was a hole where her door should have been.
"What in Merlin's name?" she gasped, upon seeing Goku sheepishly holding said door in his hand. He gave her a toothy grin nervously.
"Hehehe, uh, sorry?" he ventured. "I – uh – spent some time under heavy gravity and I don't know how to control my strength yet."
"I – gravity – so strong… what?" she babbled.
Harry decided to step in. "Sorry about that Rosie," he apologized. Taking the door frame from a sheepish Goku, he placed it back where it belonged and said, "Reparo!" to fix the damage.
"Can we get a large table?" Juliet asked quickly.
"'We'?" Rosemerta gasped, seeing the others. "Um, very well, this – uh – way please."
They were shown to a table that had been enlarged to fit the larger men. The established business' regulars stared quietly at the highly colorful group.
"So what kinda grub do you folks have?" Goku asked. "I'm so hungry I could probably eat another whale!"
"You ate a whale!" Juliet shrieked, garnering attention to herself. "A whole whale?"
Goku frowned thoughtfully. "At least, I think it was a whale," he said. "It sure was big. And it had an awful lot of teeth! Maybe it was just a big fish or something…"
The others digested this information – Lightning looking rather curiously at Goku – and they ordered food. Goku polished off nine soups, six steaks, twelve pork chops, an assortment of fish and a bunch of potatoes and side dishes. Harry had a salad.
During the meal, the students from Hogwarts started to trickle in and many could only gape at the company Harry held. They could only shrug their shoulders and with a shake of their heads they reasoned that only Harry Potter would keep such weird company.
"Allo mon chere!" Fleur said brightly. She and a heavily pregnant Kuna came up to Harry's table. Kuna narrowed her eyes.
"Who are they?" she asked snobbishly. 'They' meaning the females in Harry's group.
"Oh, just some friends from another universe, he replied casually. "Butterbeer?"
Fleur acquiesced but Kuna wanted a Gillywater. Introductions were made and Harry's new friends had mixed opinions on Harry's concubines. Goku thought it was weird, but didn't mind since they were treated well and Harry couldn't really do anything about it. Soki was totally okay with it since he came from ancient Japan and concubines were normal to him. Lightning just gave Harry an icy glare and Shelke gave Hermione a worried – but knowing – frown. Harry was just glad that none of them blew up like his mother.
Several rounds of drinks later, Harry's sister and her friends finally made an appearance. Naria's eyes bulged out at the newbs surrounding her pseudo-brother but she didn't say a thing for fear of exposing them to the public. Instead, she had Neville and Ron pull up a table – with a little help from her emerging Succubus charm – and they sat down with the adults.
Hermione gave her older 'sister' a wary look and sat down next to Ron. Ginny and Shelke just stared at eachother awkwardly. They were almost identical except for a few noticeable differences. Ginny's eyes were a soft brown while Shelke's were a deep shade of the bluest blue. Shelke's hair was chin length with the rear flaring out while Ginny's went down to the small of her back. Shelke looked extremely Asian however, but the likeliness was still there.
Introductions were made yet again and the others soon got along. Ron kept asking Soki to show him his swords while Goku nearly removed Neville's arm in an arm wrestle. Fleur's suspicion towards Lightning was removed when she found out that the quiet woman was not a Veela who was trying to steal her Harry away from her. They started to talk about fashion and looks but it was mostly Fleur talking and Lightning trying not to look bored. The fact that the beautiful woman wore no makeup whatsoever made all of the women jealous.
Some time later, Madam Rosemerta came up to the table and asked to see Harry. He followed her to the backroom, wondering what she wanted.
"Yes Rosie?" he asked. She had a somewhat dazed look, and her eyes were strangely glazed…
"Shit!" Harry swore, drawing his wand. It was just like in his sixth year when she was put under the imperious curse by Malfoy! A second later a sharp pain in his head made him fall into dreamland…