Chapter 21: Chunin Prep:

I've been a genin for a couple months now we've done more D ranks than I can count and enough C ranks to keep us busy… AND NEARLY KILL US! The village is full of psychos, sending genin on infiltration missions!

On top of my group missions, I've been doing missions with tou-san to help my kekeigenkai development… SUCH FUN! He's not acting weird but I know something is wrong, he's watching me like a hawk on these missions as if he's looking for something… I don't like it

My individual training is going well and my blood affinity technique is getting more and more awesome every time I do it! It's starting to become second nature, I can feel other people's blood without trying now but I still have to concentrate to feel their chakra. I can even tell people apart by their blood and chakra so no more sneak attacks from Yuki or other fan girls… I HATE FANGIRLS EVEN MORE THAN I HATE RABBITS!

I also learnt a new blood attack called Ruby Spear. Tou-san says it's a basic C rank attack of the clan that all clan members should know. Basically it uses chakra to shape and sharpen cells into a flexible spear or spears that can be aimed like senbon into vital organs, causing severe wounds or death. It's REALLY effective. The demonstration on a mission made me feel sick for a week, the Iwa nin knew a lot about it from the agonised screams he let out before he died. The memory of it still turns my stomach…

Kaa-san is also on the teaching wagon, near kidnapping me from team training, not that I complain because it means more precious time away from the psychopathic yaoi fangirl who is getting MORE ANNOYING BY THE DAY! She's teaching me all about herbs; how to focus my chakra correctly and when I'm not on missions forcing me to practice on animals like fish…the woman is a slave driver! I literally have nightmares about her training, more than once waking up screaming the answers to her questions!

My speed of learning is apparently verging on demonic; I'm absorbing information faster than I can get it. I was not this fast a learner in my old life, I was good but not this good… tou-san and kaa-san love it but apparently I'm scaring some of the other genin teams who have heard about me… well the boys… the girls love me, PLEASE SAVE ME FROM THEM!

I thought my days of fangirls were over… HOW WRONG I WAS! If anything it's got A LOT worse, I'm getting love letters and girls confessing to me… I DON'T WANNA! GIRLS ARE CREEPY!

Hidan is developing well, he's got even more into his religion if that is at all possible, teaching me more about it but also doing more practice of his sacrificing. It used to be just on animals but since his first kill he's gone into murder overdrive. He's been talking to me about teaching me how to sacrifice to Jashin! HELP! He's already got me praying to him… Infact the more I learn, the more I'm convinced he's the one fuckin with me… Jashin if you are the one fuckin with me I will hunt you down, god or not and kill you!

We've all had our first kills, even Yuki as shocking as it seems. She's definitely a scary bitch…I've found out her family use a type of boiling water style jutsu… she boiled her first kill alive from the inside out… what's worse is she did it ACCIDENTLY! SHE HAS NEAR NO CONTROL OVER IT!

My first kill was… violent… I 'accidently' crushed a shinobi who was about to attack Hidan from behind with one of my blood helixes, It was pretty messy all that blood screaming out to me… when no one was paying attention I sent a small wave of chakra out and it came to me, like a magnet, as if it wanted to be mine… It was creepy as hell but kinda cool… does that make me a twisted individual? I haven't told anyone, I know I'm not meant to be able to do it… I'm not going to be considered something special. I'm not anything special, I just am a little different… I haven't repeated my little test again but I have a feeling I should…

Team aka has been gathered in the 2nd training ground, tou-san apparently has something important to tell us all. Hidan is still wearing his shirt but I don't think it's going to last long, he's complaining more than usual about how uncomfortable they are and how they get in the way… I'm expecting him to one day turn up naked, PLEASE DON'T HIDAN, I'LL BE SCARED FOR LIFE!

The second tou-san arrives we stand at attention, the other two have learnt that it is better to pay attention around tou-san for his sudden change from normal to Satan's personal trainer from hell.

"Hello my little ones, it's such a beautiful day!" tou-san giggled happily as he walked towards us with a spring in his step… he's too happy… HOW ARE WE RELATED AGAIN?

"As you know we've been a team now for a few months and as a result we've done enough missions to be considered for the chunin exams and I being the best sensei in the universe have recommended you for them! I'M SO EXCITED MY LITTLE BABIES ARE GOING TO THE CHUNIN EXAMS!" He squealed happily, doing a 360 spin on his heel… kaa-san MUST have had an affair… there is no way in hell we are father and son…seriously, what the fuck!?

Hidan has a smirk on his face the second he hears the news "FUCK YEAH!" He cheered while Yuki giggled happily… I'm surrounded by sadists… I nod my head in understanding but in all honesty I'm not sure if we're ready, yes we have developed team work but Hidan still tries to murder Yuki every mission for some sort of yaoi innuendo aimed at us, yes our individual skills are good but Yuki has no control, Hidan is too scythe happy and I'm still developing mine in secret.

A sudden question pops into my head "sensei… where are the exams being held?" I wouldn't say any of the smaller villages would hold them so it would have to be one of the 5 great shinobi nations, leaf, cloud, mist, stone or sand… I don't really like the sound of any of them… I'm too lazy to travel all the way to one of them…

Tou-san's happy smile falters slightly "It's going to be held in the Mist"…

…

… WHAT! OUR TEAM, COMPRISED OF 2 KEKEIGENKAI USERS AND A JASHINIST IS GOING TO THE BLOODY MIST WHERE THEY HATE KEKEIGENKAI USERS!? I'M GUNNA DIE! HIDAN'S GOING TO BE THE ONLY ONE TO SERVIVE!

I feel my blood run cold at the thought, the bloody fucking mist village… Is the village trying to kill us? Maybe. Is tou-san crazy for willingly taking us there? DEFINITELY! Am I the only one thinking this is a bad idea? Yes… Yuki doesn't seem to recognise the danger… yes they don't cull kekeigenkai clans any more but that's because there are most likely none left in their village… I don't even know which Mizukage is in power right now… PLEASE BE MEI! I don't really fancy going there to find out which Mizukage is in power… nope, don't wanna!

Tou-san smiles at me "MY ADORABLE SON, THERE IS NO NEED TO WORRY YOUR SWEET LITTLE HEAD, DADDY WILL BE THERE TO PROTECT HIS LITTLE ONES FROM ANYONE BAD!" he suddenly flickers himself in front of me, yanking me into a bone crushing head "BUT YOUR CONCERN IS ADORABLE! DADDY LOVES HIS PRECIOUS BABY!" He squeals in my ear while nuzzling me. DO YOU WANT TO DEAFEN ME?!

I can feel my cheeks burn up with embarrassment. MAKE HIM STOP! Please don't let him do this while we're in the Mist village… I'll never live it down…

I'm suddenly yanked away from tou-san's squealing by Hida-asshole who pulls firmly into his side with his arm tightly wrapped around my shoulder. He smirks down at me playfully "we're gunna breeze it fuck face! WE'RE GUNNA BE BAD ASS CHUNIN!" He cheers to which I smile… bad-ass chunin...

We leave in a couple days… I guess I have to prepare… I just want to come back in one piece… and preferably NOT in a body bag… It's definitely Jashin who is fucking with me…