Chapter 21.
"I'm bored," Jude groaned. "And hungry."
"We'll get something to eat in the cafeteria if we don't find out anything soon," Sharon promised him. "Just be patient for a little while longer."
Callie yawned. It was getting late. Her arm was draped around Mariana, who was half-asleep, her head resting on her shoulder. Then, as if Jude's complaining had signaled it to happen, Lena finally emerged from the double doors. Callie sat up straight, regardless of her sister. "What's going on?"
Lena looked exhausted. She came to the circle where her family sat, and sunk into a chair. "So, guys, it looks like mommy has an upper-respiratory infection. She's stable, and they're giving her antibiotics intravenously to make her better. But since an infection like this could become serious, they're going to keep here here."
"For how long?" Mariana asked, her face sagging as if she might cry. Callie quickly pulled her closer, and she laid her hand over hers.
"At least overnight," Lena told her. "But it really depends on how well she responds to the antibiotics. Now, I'm going to stay here with her tonight. But Grandma will take you all home and get some dinner into you. It's going to be okay."
"Can we see mom?" Brandon asked.
"Yes," Lena nodded. "But you have to be quiet, because she's in ICU, and people are resting."
The kids and Sharon stood up, and followed Lena back through the double doors. On the way down the stark white hall, Callie remembered when Stef had been shot, and was also in the ICU. Callie didn't get to see her then; she wasn't immediate family. This time, she was, and she didn't feel so much like she was just on the outside looking in.
Stef looked small in her hospital bed, and when she saw her, Callie's eyes stung. Her tough, beautiful mother looked so defeated.
"Hi, babies," Stef managed, raising her head a few inches.
Brandon was the first to step forward. "Hi, mom." Tears glistened in the corners of his eyes as he leaned down to kiss her cheek.
As it was, Callie ended up being last in line to see her mom. There was no particular pecking order in the family; she was just too polite to crowd in front of anyone else. She stepped up to Stef cautiously. "Hi, mommy," she said quietly.
"Hi, love," said Stef. She reached out to touch her daughter's hand. "Can I have a kiss?"
Callie nodded, and bent down. She was surprised to feel her mother's arms delicately encircle her. "You look out for everyone while I'm in here," Stef whispered to her. "Okay?"
"Okay," she breathed.
Stef pressed her papery lips to Callie's forehead. "You're the strong one, whether you think you are or not. You're a survivor."
Callie looked down at the pink rubber bracelet that Stef wore; the one she'd given her. It seemed so long ago now. "So are you."
"I love you, slug-a-bug," Stef winked, her eyes glassy.
"I love you too," Callie told her. Then, Sharon motioned for her to hurry along. It was time to go home.
"I don't feel like cooking tonight," Sharon told the kids, once they were piled in Lena's car. "I know your moms don't like you to have junk food, but what do you say we go to McDonald's?"
Everyone agreed, so they pulled up at the first restaurant they saw, and ordered. Then, they found a large table, where everyone could sit to eat.
"I forgot how good fast food tastes," Jude commented, biting into his cheeseburger.
Callie ruffled his hair lovingly. "Remember how dad would take us for Happy Meals if we were good?"
Jude nodded. "We'd sit at the tables outside, and feed french fries to the birds."
Callie laughed at the memory; it felt good for a moment. Then, she looked down at her uneaten food, ashamed. Was it right to laugh when her mother was laying in the hospital, so sick? She looked over at Brandon, whose face was equally sullen.
When they were all finished eating, they went home. The house never felt emptier. Everyone congregated to the living room, trying to make it feel cozy, as they finished their homework or winded down for bed.
"Are we going to school tomorrow?" Jesus asked, looking at the clock. It was after ten o'clock.
"I don't know, kiddo," Sharon told him. "I'll have to ask Lena what she wants you to do. But we better get ourselves to bed, to be on the safe side."
The kids all looked at each other, making no move to go upstairs to their rooms. Then suddenly, Brandon stood up. "Why don't we all sleep down here tonight?"
"Yeah," Callie agreed. "We'll feel better if we're all together."
"I think that's a good idea," Sharon nodded. "As long as I get dibs on the sofa. Once I get down on the floor, I'll never be able to get back up."
"Sounds fair," said Brandon.
Callie followed her siblings upstairs, and they gathered their pillows and blankets. On the way down the hall, she peeked into her moms' room. Their bed was unmade, and against Stef's pillow, her teddy bear rested. She'd forgotten to take it with her; she always brought it to the hospital, even to chemo. Callie looked at it sadly, then went to it and picked it up. She hugged it to her chest as her eyes welled with tears. She'd give it to Lena when she came home for clean clothes the next day; she would bring it to the hospital for Stef. But for that night, Callie decided it would sleep with her.
"Callie?" said Brandon, peering in the dimness of the room. "You coming?"
"Yeah," she said. "I'm just getting some extra blankets."
He nodded, looking down, then came closer. "You know, tonight, you've been more like you used to be. Before mom got sick."
"What do you mean?" she asked.
"You're just being brave," he told her. "The way you've been taking care of Mariana and Jude, and all. I've missed that side of you."
She shrugged, grasping the bear. "I'm just doing what I have to do."
"I wanted to show you this," Lena told Stef. She took the pamphlet from the bedside table, and passed it to her wife. "See, they do beauty treatments and demonstrations, and you get free products to take home..."
Stef opened it and looked it over, coughing. "Hmm."
"It might be fun," she told her, trying to sound more cheerful than she felt. "You deserve an afternoon of pampering, honey."
Managing a small smile, Stef nodded. "Is this something you would want to do with me?"
"Actually," said Lena. "I was thinking... it might be something fun for you to do with the girls. They could use a mother-daughter day with you, to take their minds off of things. They'd love trying on make-up and stuff. I could do something fun with the boys that day. What do you think?"
"I'd love to do this with them," Stef replied. She looked down at the IV in her arm. "If I make it out of here."
Lena shook her head defiantly, tears blurring her vision. "Don't talk like that, honey. Please. It scares me. I'm worried about you enough."
"I'm sorry," Stef sighed. "It's just hard to think positive in here." She glanced down at her other arm, and felt an instant of regret. "Oh no. I forgot my bear. The one Callie gave me. We left in such a hurry..."
"It's too late to go get it, sweets," Lena told her. "The kids are probably in bed. But I'll go home and get it for you tomorrow. I promise." She reached out to touch her wife's hand. "Just rest..."
"I can't," Stef fretted, her eyes filling with tears. "It hurts. And I miss my babies."
Lena's heart ached. Standing up, she went to the opposite side of Stef's bed, and climbed in beside her, taking her in her arms as well as she could without disturbing the various wires and tubes attached to her. She pressed a kiss to her cheek. "Please don't cry, baby." She kissed her again. "Just think... the sooner you get well, the sooner you get to go home to them. But you have to rest, and do what the doctors say first."
With a nod, Stef snuggled against Lena, her tears drying on her cheeks. She was always cold lately, but her wife felt so warm, so comforting.
"I love you," Lena whispered.
"I love you too," Stef replied. She closed her eyes, and slowly let the sounds of beeping monitors lull her to sleep.
The kids arranged their bedding on the living room floor. Callie was between Mariana and Jude, and Brandon and Jesus were above them. Sharon spread a blanket on the sofa and fluffed her pillow. "You guys," she said, sitting down. "I know that you don't study any particular religion, but I was raised Protestant, and so was your mother. I think it would be nice if we all said a little prayer for her tonight." Her grandchildren looked at her questioningly. "We have nothing to lose," she told them. "And if someone's up there listening, it couldn't hurt."
"I think that's a good idea," said Jesus. He turned to look at his siblings.
"Okay then," said Sharon. She put her hands together and closed her eyes, imploring the kids to do the same. They did, and she began to speak softly. "Please, protect Stef tonight. Give her comfort and rest while she sleeps, and give her doctors the wisdom to treat her. Let her regain her strength and vitality soon so she can come home to her precious children. Watch over Lena, as well. Help her to keep her energy up as she cares for her wife. And watch over us. Calm our worries and give us peace. Amen." She opened her eyes, watching her sleepy grandchildren.
"That's was nice, Grandma," said Mariana.
"Thanks, honey," she yawned, laying down. "Goodnight."
"Goodnight," said Mariana. She lay down on her sleeping bag and turned to Callie. "Did you guys ever go to church when you were little?"
"Sometimes," Callie replied, resting her arms behind her head. "On holidays and stuff."
"So did we," Mariana replied. "We'd go to mass on Christmas eve, before Ana got really bad. I still think it was beautiful, with the candles and the stained glass."
Callie made no reply, but reached out to hold her sister's hand. Then the light went out, and it was dark.
"Callie?" Jude whispered from the pallet next to her, a few minutes later.
"What?" she whispered back.
"I can't sleep," he confided. "I miss moms."
"I know," she sighed, looking up at the shadowy ceiling. "Me too."
"Mama always kisses me goodnight," he told her quietly. "And tucks me in."
She turned to her little brother. "Move closer to me, if you want."
Jude shifted closer, tucking himself under her arm. He hugged her around the waist, and she kissed the top of his head. It felt just like the old days, except now, they were surrounded by people they loved. They didn't have only each other.
The clock ticked on the mantle, and Callie pulled her blanket up to her chin. She brushed her finger across her nose, and her thumb touched her lips. Quickly, she dropped her hand to her side and curled up closer to Jude.
To Be Continued