Finally getting out of the early winter weather to finish the potion with Malfoy Hermione trudged up the small hill to the school. She walked slowly from the cold that had seeped into her muscles, but she arrived before Malfoy again and began setting things up. Hermione was pretty sure after today they would have to potion down pat. She realized she hadn't worked at all on how to counter act the paralysis. Without even considering it, she had just left it to Malfoy to figure out. Which he probably would anyway. But she didn't want him to think she wasn't putting in the work.
Hurrying over to the desk, Hermione didn't sit but leaned over to look at their notes, trying to find at least something she could bring up to Malfoy.
Ten minutes later, and slightly late, Hermione started as Malfoy rushed through the door. Her surprise at his loud entrance was nothing to her surprise at his appearance though. His hair was completely loose and free around his face, surprisingly longer than Hermione had thought. His blond fringe framed bright pink cheeks, high over a broad grin.
The strangest thing though was his eyes, they were light gray, almost the same color as the stormy sky outside, but they were positively sparkling. They had always seemed to Hermione to be the most communicative part of his face, and right now they were practically screaming happiness.
Hermione was too surprised to even raise her eyebrow. She just stood as Malfoy walked over to her and wrapped her up into a hug, spinning her around once for good measure.
"We did It, Hermione. We actually fucking did it." He stepped back to look at her face. "We made a new potion, a fucking great potion," His hands still on either one of her shoulders he shook her slightly as though to emphasize his point. "and gods, do you like flying? Because I swear, there is nothing to compare."
Hermione was slowly beginning to regain her composure, but still couldn't quite believe that the person in front of her was actually Draco Malfoy. Suspecting Polyjuice Potion she looked at him carefully.
"Draco, do you know where you are? Do you know who you are talking to?" Half joking, half serious, Hermione actually wanted to hear his response.
Malfoy's face fell into a mask of mock seriousness. "Yes, I bloody well know who I am talking to Granger. I am talking to the only other person who can actually appreciate what we have just accomplished!" His smile was back, and Hermione tentatively returned one of her own.
"That's the spirit. Now, I believe I know what we need to adjust, it's quite simple really, let's get started."
And with that, he began working on the potion. Hermoine stood still for a couple of minutes simply watching him in amazement, but eventually jumped in beside him.
Like the last two night, they didn't talk much. Unlike the last two nights, Malfoy seemed to be humming to himself while we worked. Amused at the new development in his personality Hermione didn't say anything, only shook her head, making sure that he could see.
Hermione had often experienced Harry and Ron's adrenalin highs after flying, but she had never expected to see it in Malfoy. Her newfound determination to keep her distance from him was already slipping. This person was simply completely different from the person she had seen this morning.
After making the few adjustments to their potion, a combination of their success yesterday, and Malfoy's exuberance made Hermione considerably less nervous than she had been.
Immediately after finishing, without a word to the strange and cheerful Malfoy, Hermione drank down a full cup. Malfoy turned as she swallowed and halted, anxiety suddenly showing on his face.
Hermione swallowed. One second. Two seconds… Hermione smiled, and she was actually able to!
"Haha!" Hermione did a little jump unable to contain her excitement and Malfoy's smile returned.
"You can move..."
"So it would seem." Hermione spun on her heals in a full circle, arms wide. "I can move!"
Draco quickly gathered here in another hug, this one much tighter than before.
"We did it." His voice was barely above a whisper, and it felt like he was letting rather a lot of his weight rest on Hermione, his head on her shoulder despite their height difference. They stood that way for a second, both of them breathing in their accomplishment.
"So," Hermione cleared her throat, stepping back "We still need to do the tests. Make sure that part is still working too." And she held out her hand waiting patiently.
Malfoy quickly pulled out his knife and put her hand in his again. Hermione was finding it very difficult not to flinch now that she could actually move. Looking at a knife about to cut through you was something your brain would simply always fight against she figured. Hermione felt the pressure as Draco pressed the tip of the knife to her palm. She closed her eyes to help stop herself from pulling her hand back.
She heard Malfoy chuckle and opened her eyes quickly to see her hand, and his filling with blood
"Since you didn't even notice when I cut you, I am going to assume it did not hurt." Setting down his knife, he pulled his wand from his robes. Holding it lightly he murmured a healing charm, tracing the cut, skin sealing behind the path he traced. For a moment Hermione was reminded of earlier that morning when Malfoy had been lightly holding his wand. He had the same grip on it now, light and loose, but completely in control. Her heart took two quick beats, but his face was still smiling, this simply was not the same person as before. It couldn't be.
Shaking her head Hermione tried to put those thoughts aside for now.
"Next."
Hermione held out her arm for Malfoy to break. He raised his eyebrows slightly at her sudden demand, but after taking a deep bracing breath like he had last night, he said the spell that would break her bone.
A shudder went through her body at the snapping sound, like a twig being stepped on. Only considerably louder. But she did not feel any pain. She nodded quickly at Malfoy "Good, now fix it please." Her voice shook a little bit, and Malfoy hadn't missed it.
"It hurts?"
Hermione shook her head "No, it just… I don't exactly enjoy standing here with my arm bending the wrong way. I'm feeling a little dizzy." A little didn't exactly cover it. The world was spinning slowly, and Hermione was sure if her bone were not healed soon, she would be falling to the floor for the third time in as many days.
Possibly Malfoy had noticed the blood draining from her face because he didn't hesitate to cast the healing spell and step back as she moved to lean against a desk.
"Ok, so now what?" Draco was looking to her for direction, clearly not wanting to push her.
Hermione knew what they needed to do next. She also knew that Draco would not be happy about it.
"Draco," She intentionally used his first name, hoping to communicate how serious she was, "You have to Crucio me."
"Ha! Um, I'm sorry, what did you say?" Malfoy was immediately serious again, condescension in his voice that Hermione hadn't noticed in awhile "I must be mistaken because I could have sworn you just asked to have the Cruciatus Curse cast on you."
He just looked down at her, nose in the air and eyes narrowed. This was the Malfoy she had dealt with for the last six years. And, it was what she had expected.
"I know it seems crazy" Malfoy scoffed, clearly thinking that 'crazy' was not the word he would have chosen. "But what else can we do? You want to give this potion to the people we are trying to protect not knowing if it will actually work?"
Hermione paused, but Malfoy just kept staring, so she continued "As everyone is quick to point out, the unforgivable curses are old magic. It doesn't react the same. We may have just created the most powerful pain blocking potion in existence… But we don't know if it will counter act the old magic. Not until we try it."
Hermione waited for him to speak, but again, he just stared down at her "Look, if you have another option, I'll take it. I'm not exactly jumping at the chance to be cursed. But, if not…" She let the statement stand. Determined this time to wait for him to speak.
After a slow sigh Malfoy finally responded; "Even if you are right, which you have an unfortunate habit of being, there are so many holes in this plan I can't even begin counting them."
Hermione just raised an eyebrow, imitating his earlier tactic to keep him talking
"Ok. One," Malfoy held one finger out in front of them " you are assuming I can cast an unforgivable. Two, If I could cast an unforgivable, which I am not admitting to being able to do, we are on Hogwarts ground. Hogwarts is protected. Anyone using that kind of magic here would certainly set off all kinds of alarms."
Hermione had anticipated this, Hogwarts; A History had mentioned protections of the sort.
"We won't do it here. Christmas break is barely under a month away. We wait until then. We can meet up in a place with lots of magic, but somewhere private, the Leaky Cauldron, or, I'm sure there is somewhere in Knockturn Ally. Even with the trace, they won't know it is us. They won't be able to trace it." She had been pretty proud of this idea, trying to ignore the fact that they would not only be breaking school rules, but laws if they did actually do this.
"Wait almost four weeks?"
"I know it isn't ideal - but like I said, better than giving them a faulty potion." Hermione waited for Malfoy to consider what she had said.
"Three" Malfoy went on holding out another finger, and giving no indication of what he thought of Hermione's latest idea "in case you forgot, the unforgivable curses are illegal. Effectively a one-way ticket to Azkaban. And you want me to cast it. Even if we don't get caught at the time, suppose for some reason" he rolled his eyes pointedly "I am taken into custody, and my wand examined. Do you think they would believe me that the victim had asked to have the curse cast on them?"
Truthfully Hermione hadn't considered this point. Potential arrest and investigation were not exactly things she thought about often. "Well," she tried to think quickly "first" she held out a finger in imitation of Malfoy "if you do know the Cruciatus Curse, then it will show in your wand already. Doing it once more is unlikely to make a difference. And second, you can use my wand."
She said it without really thinking, but she hadn't thought it too big of an issue. The shock on Malfoy's face seemed to indicate otherwise, but she continued,
"I know it won't work as well as your own, but, if I give it willingly, it should work alright. Plus, your magic is powerful enough, you'd still be able to get the effect across, even if it wasn't as intense as it usually is when you cast it."
"you realize you would also be sent to Azkaban if they found your wand having cast an unforgivable I presume?" It seemed that condescension was how Malfoy dealt with being off balance, he decided not to mention how personal it was to allow another to use your wand.
"Maybe, but why would they ever have reason to search my wand? Also, you may be forgetting that I am best friends with the 'Chosen One'. I'm not above using his fame to keep myself out of trouble."
She cringed slightly at how Slytherin this sounded. But honestly, if it came down to it, she doubted they would imprison one of Harry Potter's best friends. Especially after how much help she would be providing in the coming war.
"Ok," Malfoy seemed to have taken her Slytherin behavior in stride "Last question." He paused, looking directly at Hermione, forcing eye contact.
"Have you considered the toll an unforgivable curse take on the one that casts it?"
Hermione was completely thrown by this. Maybe it was the intensity when Malfoy had said that, or maybe it was the almost-admission that he had cast an unforgivable, but she had to work to keep herself from shivering at the chill that went down her spine. She hadn't known there would be any effect on the caster, no spell she had ever cast had done that.
Malfoy took a deep breath and began pacing seeming to anticipate her lack of knowledge, "The unforgivable curses are so named because of their cruel nature. But that is not all," He was gesturing with his hands while he spoke, and Hermione was reminded strongly of a Professor lecturing to a student "there are plenty of evil spells that are not considered 'unforgivable'. I just cast a spell on your arm and, with no effort on my side, broke the bone in your wrist. That is nothing compared to what some curses can do. But the unforgivable curses have been singled out because of their effect on the caster. There is no clear way to explain it to someone who has not experienced it…"
Malfoy continued pacing but seemed to be having a hard time deciding what to say next. For her part Hermione sat frozen, watching his path and listening intently. His voice was slightly less composed as he continued.
"It is like the feeling that a dementor gives you. Empty darkness. Only... it draws you in. Your mind will fight against the pull of the dementor. Your mind races towards the pull of the unforgivable. It is a comfortable darkness. Soft and deep. Like home, almost… safe."
Hermione could only stare. Malfoy cleared his throat and continued, back in professor mode.
"The unforgivable curses are singled out because they are, simply, temptation. They are a pull to what you would call 'evil'. They are like a muggle drug. Each time you cast is a hit, it takes you further into oblivion, but you welcome it. It can take many times to fully corrupt of course, but still…" Malfoy paused his pacing directly in front of Hermione, locking eyes with her once more.
"So let me ask you this, Hermione. Do really want me to perform this spell? On you? With no one else around? Knowing the state of mind it will put me under, the pull it will have?"
His eyes were narrowed, and there was danger in his voice again, but Hermione didn't think it was directed at her.
"Exactly how far are you willing to trust someone like me?"
Hermione tried to speak, she really did, but her voice seemed to have left sometime during Malfoy's speech, and she didn't know exactly how to get it back. Malfoy looked at her searchingly, and Hermione had a thought that maybe he was referring to more than just letting him cast the curse on her.
Malfoy's eyes clouded over, narrow and dark. "I guess we have our answer."
"Wait," Hermione jumped up, having finally found her voice and grabbed his arm to prevent him from leaving the room. He only looked at her, his face a mask, betraying no emotion. "Draco, I…"
She didn't know what she wanted to say. This man was dangerous, as she had been reminded this morning. But, that wasn't what concerned her most, she didn't want to be the cause of further pushing him down the path he was going.
What had he said? Like a hit to a drug addict? She didn't want to do that, but…
Malfoy shook his head, an ugly smirk on his face at Hermione's continued lack of comment, and turned to leave again.
Acting truly on impulse, like the Gryffindor she was Hermione redoubled her grip on Malfoy's arm and spun him around. Before he could do anything, she reached down to the cuff of his left sleeve and pulled it up.
There on his arm was the Dark Mark. She had been hoping she had been wrong. Hoping he had been bluffing, but there it was. Black as ink against Malfoy's pale, ivory, skin.
Hermione hadn't been sure how Malfoy would react, but he seemed almost too surprised to move, taking advantage of his momentary pause Hermione left one hand wrapped tightly around his left wrist and brought the other up behind his neck, pulling Draco's head close enough to hers that their foreheads were pressed together.
"I trust you, Malfoy. I simply do not want to make anything worse." She glanced only briefly at his arm, but Malfoy hadn't missed it. His eyes were trained on hers, as though searching for a lie.
They stood that way for more than a few minutes. Neither one exactly sure what their next move should be. Eventually, Draco closed his eyes and leaned his forehead more completely against Hermione's. Placing his free arm on her shoulder and wrapping it around her neck, but not pulling her any closer, they both simply stood. Breathing, and feeling.
Whatever was happening with Draco right now, the last thing Hermione wanted to do was interrupt. He seemed to be… processing? She didn't know. She was happy to simply feel the light pulse in his wrist, now held gently in her hand. And the feeling of his head against hers was surprisingly comforting. It was… intimate. She smiled briefly when Malfoy had rested his arm across her shoulders, and decided now was one of those times when she should just stop thinking.
An indeterminable amount of time later, but not entirely long enough, she heard Malfoy let out a heavy breath and opened her eyes. He was staring right back at her, closing his eyes lightly he leaned forward and lightly brushed his nose against Hermione's before taking a step back and running a hand through his hair.
Partly disappointed, and partly relieved, Hermione looked back at him. She was full of questions but now was not the time. She did not want to do anything to break the spell that seemed to be surrounding them.
"I'll do it." Malfoy said this simply.
He looked at Hermione questioningly, but when she didn't respond, he simply nodded, turned, and walked out of the room.