"Fine you can go," Nathan grit out from behind clenched teeth, slowly he lowered his hands which had been gripped into his hair.

Her eyes were disbelieving behind the sheen of tears. "Nathan, I do not need your perm—"

"Yes, you do! If I was going to take off for five months, I'd be asking for your permission. Don't even try to pretend that this doesn't affect me as much as it does you," he cursed softly under his breath. "I know you would have done this with or without my permission so maybe it doesn't matter to you."

"This isn't about you! Nathan, please don't take this personally—"

He cut her off with a harsh and bitter laugh. "Not about me? How can it not be about me, Haley? Before you, I didn't even have the concept of personal. Everything about you is about me."

"I don't know how to talk to you about this, Nathan. Why do you think it's taken me so long…" Haley took a deep breath, "to own up? I know Jenna and she wouldn't have lied. She must have told you whenever I was at a meeting. It's done, Nathan, okay? I couldn't talk to you about this during the process because if I did, I wouldn't have the nerve to go through with it."

"Done?"

"All the paperwork's done. My parents paid already, Adam and Viv even chipped in a couple thousand. I can't just back out now," her face contorted miserably when he picked up a shoe and threw it across the room, the rubber bouncing harmlessly against the wall. "I'm sorry. I don't know what to say to make this better."

Nathan just gave her a disbelieving look. "Nothing? Nothing crosses your mind? How about 'I'm not going'? 'This is all a joke?' Damn, Haley," he dropped onto her bed, palms crushing into his face. "You couldn't have talked to me about this even a little? Given me some kind of warning?"

"You understand though?" she questioned hopefully.

He gave off another bitter laugh. It was ridiculous how well she could read him, sense even the slightest cracks in his exterior, and when he was about to give into her. "Well, you haven't really left me much of a choice. It's what? Agree or lose you? Agree and lose you anyway?"

Haley's expression dropped into one of misery he'd never even seen before. "How could you even think those things, Nathan? When have we ever been all or nothing?

"What am I supposed to think, Haley? This morning I thought the biggest thing on your to do list was to sign up for next year's housing with Jenna. Now you're telling me you're not even going to be on campus next year! Hell, you're moving to another country for who knows how long and I'm supposed to have seen this coming?" Nathan heaved a sigh, knowing arguing about it now wouldn't change anything. "Haley, you already know how hard our relationship's been—especially since we've been at school. Do you really think it can handle this much stress?" He buried his face in his hands, missing the shock and dismay that immediately crossed her features.

"Well, I'm sorry. I didn't realize how much of a burden it was for you to be with me. If you felt that way, why the hell didn't you just break up with me in Tree Hill? Were you just trying to beat Dan again? Prove you weren't going to leave the high school sweetheart high and dry? Congrats, Nathan, you never managed to knock me up so you can stop feeling obligated to hang around!" Haley made for the door but he quickly grabbed her wrist and spun her back into his chest. "I'm so sorry. I didn't mean that but you think I haven't been stressed too? It's practically made me sick to keep this from you," she mumbled into his shirt, feeling even guiltier.

Nathan held on tightly even as she huffed and puffed, making half-hearted attempts to pull away. Internally, he rolled his eyes at the last statement. That certainly explained a lot about the last few weeks. Dumb girl would rather make herself sick and worry them both than speak up. "Then you shouldn't have," he spoke tiredly, getting another mumbled apology. "How in hell did me being upset that we're going to have an ocean between us turn into…this?"

"When I said stress, I meant stress for me. I don't know if I can stand being away from you for that long. I'm almost positive I can't. And I know we've only been together two and a half years but I don't think I can function without knowing you're behind me every step of the way. I don't know if I can keep from killing all those stupid groupies and everyone who'll say it's okay if I cheat because, hey, you're not here and you'll never know." Haley gave a visible full-body cringe at the last statement and he tightened his hold. "I'm not saying I even want to and I definitely won't. But I already know what everyone else is going to say and expect and I don't want to deal with their bullshit."

"It's going to be hard, really hard, especially once the season starts. I'll have a shit day and want you and I'll have to settle for a phone call or an email. I can't keep you tied to me forever. You're so much better than that and you're going to do so many great things but that doesn't mean I don't want to. I know you need to find yourself, but I hate that it means being apart from me. You're worth it now, Hales. And I can't imagine you getting any better but when you find whatever part of you that's 'missing', I'll be more than happy to benefit from that, too."

Haley gave a watery smile, pressing a hand against his heart. "Has anyone told you that you're kind of perfect, Nathan Scott?"

"Only because you helped me get there," he smiled softly down at her, brushing back a few loose strands of hair. "We're going to be okay, right?"

"If either of us has anything to say about it, hell yes."

She gripped tightly to Lydia's hand as they strolled through the Raleigh airport. It felt more like a death march than anything. Jimmy was parking the car and would meet them at the security gate and she had a fleeting worry that he wouldn't be able to make it.

They had made arrangements almost four months ago for her to leave from the Raleigh airport. It was a compromise so that he wouldn't have to drive all the way home from school just to see her off. With the situation as it was, Haley wasn't entirely sure he would show up. Her parents had also insisted on being about four hours earlier than her flight, worried since it'd be her first time out of the country. She was sure that if Nathan did show, it'd be at the last second and after multiple hours of debating with himself.

Nathan sat on a bench just behind the international check-in of her airline, legs splayed, arms crossed, and looking just as surly as his high school days when Dan ruled with an iron fist. She let out a quiet sob at seeing him there and his head turned faster than if he'd been whiplashed.

The next thing Haley knew, she was wrapped tight in his hard arms, almost crying openly as her mom whispered a few words of comfort before stepping to the side with her suitcases. "You're here?"

"Of course, I'm here. You better not be all hugged up with some stranger," he muttered, arms wrapping tighter. He felt her shaking in his arms and pressed a kiss to the top of her head. "You alright?"

Nathan could feel her head shaking 'no' against his chest and bit back the urge to tell her to stay. Her arms squeezed around his waist and she lifted her head, reluctantly pulling away. "Thanks for coming," Haley murmured, managing a small smile before taking her lower lip between her teeth. She leaned forward again, pressing her lips against his heart before retreating. "I didn't think you would."

His eyes softened as he caught her hand, tugging her closer again. "I'm sorry. We should—"

"Nathan, I'm getting on a plane in three hours and I'm not coming back for five months. Talking isn't going to change that," she rushed out, wincing when his expression fell. Out of the corner of her eye, Haley saw her dad approaching and again moved back, ignoring Nathan's look of frustration.

"Hey there kids," Jimmy greeted with slightly forced amiability. He slung an arm around Haley's shoulders before dropping a kiss on top of her head. "You all checked in, Haley Bob?"

"Yes, Jimmy, that's why I'm standing here with her suitcases," Lydia called from the sidelines. "Will you get over here and leave them be?" Her exasperated look was returned with a deep sigh and dragging feet from Jimmy as Nathan and Haley looked on with matching amused expressions.

Haley sighed before turning back to Nathan as he entwined their fingers. "Can we not argue? I'm just really happy you came."

He nodded slowly before swallowing hard. "Okay. Why don't you check in? I think your mom's losing her hearing trying to eavesdrop."

She quirked a smile before gesturing her parents over to the end of the line. Lydia quickly moved towards it while Nathan approached Jimmy. The older man offered a comforting pat on the back and urged Nathan to take the seat next to him. "Those James girls, huh? Feels like my heart's breaking every time one says goodbye."

"Not helping, Jimmy," he muttered, shaking his head lightly. Nathan heaved a sigh as he watched Haley, looking very much like she was about to face a firing squad.

"It'll be alright, Nathan. I know it'll be hard but if you wait, she'll come back. And if you're lucky, you'll never have to say goodbye again," Jimmy advised, letting out his own sigh when Nathan grunted in response. "It'll be alright, son," he repeated, giving a small wave when Haley suddenly turned around, as if she were expecting them to be gone.

Nathan stood as she returned, this time only a purse and laptop case in hand, and immediately wrapped his arms around her. "Unless you plan on carrying her to security check, you might want to let go," Lydia teased, smiling tightly when both their faces fell at her words. They dejectedly shuffled off towards the security line as she shared a look with Jimmy.

"With how long they'll be together, five months is barely a drop in the bucket."

"Alright, Romeo, give me the poison. Juliet's not dead; she's just not here," Jenna said, barging into the dark room without any warning. Rolling her eyes when Nathan used a few choice words to tell her to leave, she paused in the doorway, flicking on the fluorescent lights. "Wait, you have showered in the last three days right?"

"If I say no, will you go away?" Nathan grumbled from his pillow. He'd throw a shoe at her but he was pretty sure Jake and Haley would kill him for it. "Leave, Jenna, and leave Jake's key behind too."

"You boys don't lock your room. I didn't need a key to get in," she sighed, hopping onto Jake's bed across the room. "Seriously, Nathan, pull yourself together. Do you know how guilty Haley would feel if she knew you were acting like this?"

"Good, she should feel guilty. What the hell was she thinking leaving me here?"

"She should feel guilty? Is that why you keep acting like everything's just fine whenever you two email or webcam, which I might add is about three times a day? Worst broken up couple ever," she muttered lightly, a sympathetic smile overruling her tone.

Nathan cursed under his breath and the smile fell. "Damn it, Nathan. Why don't you do something about it instead of just sit here wallowing in your own misery? It's getting pretty pathetic," she arched an eyebrow before realizing he was still face down in his bed.

"Pathetic would be flying to another continent—which I'm sure is your idea of doing something—to chase a girl who broke up with me," he snarled, fists clutching the sheets.

Jenna grinned at his accuracy. "Just because it's a cliché, doesn't mean it won't work. Come on, picture it. She's sitting at a sidewalk café, you walk up, hands completely empty because you just had to see her, she cries tears of happiness, and five minutes later you're in her room, torturing a whole new roommate. It'll be just like old times."

"This coming from the girl who's been waiting over a year for my roommate to make a move?" Nathan shot back, grumbling into his pillow.

"If you had pulled your head out of your ass anytime this semester, then you'd know that Jake and I started dating a month ago," she replied quietly, obviously stung by his remark and lack of awareness. His head popped up and he turned to stare at her with a guilty expression, her eyes narrowing at the several days of scruff on his face.

Jenna sighed before playfully rolling her eyes. "It's fine, Nate. You don't have to apologize for being a crappy friend." This time his eyes narrowed at her and she waved him off, "Yeah, I know you weren't going to anyway, jerk. Okay, look, Haley thinks she's missing something and she may very well be right. I think she's going to have a hell of a time finding it without you, and obviously, you're not doing so great away from her either. It's hard to make the first move but isn't it harder to be without her?"

Finally, Nathan sat up on his bed, swinging his legs over the edge. "Get out, Jenna. I'm not going to say it again or any nicer."

"Fine," she scoffed, throwing herself off the bed and out the door. "Can't say I didn't try. Ass!"

Nathan just smirked.