WOO! More chapters than my previous story! cough
Chapter 19: Possibility of Change
"You know, Xani. . . I am certain now, we're not going to get out of here. . ." Chereesa mused for the tenth time that day as she stared ahead of herself.
"You already said that today. . ."
"Yes, but I am certain now."
"You already said that as well."
After the failed breakout attempt, the centaur had not chosen to just kill the rest of them, but had instead not done anything to them for two whole days. That included giving them food and water. Their bodies had deteriorated into bony husks of what they once were and hunger and thirst, especially the thirst, gnawed at them continuously. Slowly the temperatures had increased as well during the day, until it was now truly starting to get dangerous to be in the sun for to long. Night-elves were hardy creatures when it came to surviving the natural elements, but there were limits. Already several night-elves had died of thirst, starvation and the heat.
But after those two days, and that was the day they 'lived' in today, the centaur had again started to take night-elves for execution. It was more execution now, instead of torture and then death, as if letting them die from thirst and starvation wasn't going quickly enough for them. And it was Obi who had been dragged out of the cage that morning. Barely a few screams were heard before it went silent again. But maybe it had just been an end to an even greater torture. It hadn't done any good to Xani's state of mind that it had been someone closer to her this time, but it had been even worse for Chereesa, who not long after Obi had fallen silent had openly admitted to having been in love with him and that it had been mutual. Xani had suspected that, but had never voiced her suspicions before. In a futile attempt to cheer Chereesa up, she asked what Chereesa found so attractive in Obi. She never got an answer. Chereesa had sunken away into deeper regions of her mind, trying to remember better times.
Again the dreadful moment came when centaur again stood at the entrance and had opened the door. The centaur now seemed truly far less eager to make their captives suffer. They still only pointed at one captive who had to come forth. Fear clenched Xani's heart. The centaur pointed at her! She hung her head for a moment and swallowed hard before looking at Chereesa for a moment. Chereesa was by then aware of the choice the centaur had made. They exchanged looks, but Xani only found very puzzling messages within Chereesa's.
Eventually Chereesa said, "No way. . ." And almost visibly Xani saw something snap within Chereesa. Xani's friend stood up on shaky, weak, legs. Xani was to weak to make any protest, but had wanted to shout at her, 'What are you doing? Sit back down! It's my turn!' But she couldn't, the sound wouldn't come forth from her dried throat, or at least not loud enough.
Instead of Xani, Chereesa ran at the centaur as if it were her destiny awaiting in their arms. One of the centaur caught her and for a moment had a puzzled look on his face. The centaur who caught the elf briefly exchanged glances with his companion and then shrugged. After a brief look in Xani's direction that seemed to say, 'don't worry, you'll be next' the two centaur dragged Chereesa away. Xani stretched out her arm in futile attempt to pull her friend back, but Chereesa was dozens of feet beyond her grasp.
No no no no, don't leave me all alone! I want out to! Her voice still would not work, though. She looked desperately at the six other night-elves remaining, but they did nothing besides give mournful looks. In her not completely sane mind anymore, she moved into a position that priestesses normally used during prayers. By Elune, please. . . GET ME THE HELL OUT OF HERE! She fell back and lay motionless for minutes, eyes closed, and listened for screams, but there was only silence. Only when somebody touched her, to see if she was dead, did she open her eyes again.
Kaylin hovered over her. Kaylin's expression was as emotionless as it normally was, but her voice did express concern, even though it was unrecognisably distorted by drought. "Can you hear me?" She asked concerned. Xani only nodded weakly. "Sit up, you're catching to much sun if you stay down like this." For a moment Xani wondered whether survival was the sole driving force for Kaylin, no matter in what sort of shape it might leave her. Even though Xani had lost any true will to survive, she still struggled to sit up as Kaylin had told her to.
While Xani thought she was nearing her last bit of strength, there was one who was even worse physically. The only signs that Jonno was still alive came when somebody every now and then checked whether he was still breathing.
Hours went by, but the centaur didn't return. Slowly, Xani felt her consciousness waning. Death seemed to be only inches away from her, staring her right in the face. She didn't care anymore. Her deterioration was noticed by Kaylin, who sighed as she counted the elves remaining. "Seven. . . There are only seven of us left." Kaylin said to keep Xani focused. "Seven. . . Out of. . . Tens. . . of thousands. . ." Kaylin sighed heavily again. "Tens of thousands when our battlegroup was at the height of it's strength. . ." Kaylin now seemed lost in the past herself.
Amazingly Xani's voice now did work, albeit very poorly and softly. "That isn't helping. . . Commander. . ."
Kaylin snapped back to reality. "I know. . . But the good news is. . . That we are still alive."
"Good?"
"See. . . We still have a chance of getting out of here. . ."
"I can't even walk. . ."
"Yeah, well, we'll just think of something for that when the time comes. Just hang in there."
Slightly, very slightly, reassured by Kaylin's words, she stayed conscious. Looking over to Jonno, she wondered whether maybe he had gone into some sort of trance, for he was still alive. He was still in the same state as he had been all day and had not moved once to her knowledge. Any sense of time she still had, left her. She fantasised about drinking whole bodies of water dry. Her barren surroundings changed to a whole ocean of cool water.
Something shook her from her delirious state of mind, quite literally. Kaylin shook her shoulders to get her back to full consciousness. The world got back into focus. Kaylin said something to her, she seemed excited about something, but Xani didn't understand. It was as if her mind was just incapable of processing the sounds and images that came to her. Kaylin disappeared from her side, of to chase what had made her so excited, Xani suspected. Slowly she remembered where she was again and she wanted it to go away again. But as she let her tilt to the side, she noticed something that made at least curious enough to stay conscious a bit longer.
Outside the cage, she saw four legged creatures running away from her position. They seemed to be afraid. She grew more interested and started fighting to truly regain full consciousness. The other elves around were excited, just like Kaylin. Xani realized that some of the sounds she was hearing were of commotion further in the centaur village. The sounds of battle. Battle against the centaur. She managed to make a link between the sounds of battle and the fleeing centaur. Something is driving them away!
The battle didn't last long at all, the sounds were soon gone. What replaced them to draw Xani's curiosity was a figure at the entrance to the prison. A large figure. A very large furry figure. With large sideways jutting horns. Or rather one sideways jutting horn, the other had broken of. A tauren! She finally realized. A very large black tauren at that. The tauren seemed to be equally surprised as most of the elves were. Tauren! That's a good thing! Suddenly she remembered the tauren's affiliation with the orcs. Sure enough, the large tauren called out something and an orc appeared. Seemingly one in command. Anything is better than this hellhole! And she blacked out.
"So. . . Who have stood out so far?" Talgrun asked, rubbing the side of his head. Even though it was already evening, a massive headache was still wrecking his head, the lingering result of several pints to many the previous night. It had been an attempt to momentarily forget his problems with the past. For a moment it had worked, but it did not have a great effect on his mood the next day, and this was the fourth day in a row like this.
The officers gathered around him in one of the tents on the training field momentarily muttered amongst themselves. These were just the officers of his own group of trainees, the officers of the other groups he could talk with another time. The muttering stopped and Kargagtha stood up to speak. The question had been about which of the trainees showed great promise. He had been meaning to discuss that subject earlier, but had decided it was to early then. "Well, two mainly stand out." Kargagtha said. "First there is Kiramm. . . She seems to overly excel in hand-to-hand combat, already after this short time. We believe she might have had some training from her parents or somebody else. She is extremely quick and agile. Besides that, she is among better quarter of all trainees in all other parts of training."
Talgrun remembered having seen her nearly beat the training officer of hand-to-hand combat to the ground during a demonstration. "I remember her, she's the one with the rather short dark red hair, right?" There were others who fitted that description, but none of those Talgrun remembered to be anything special in hand-to-hand combat. If he remembered right, she was of pretty much the exact age that orcs normally started warrior training and was of warrior parents.
"Yes, that's her. We all agree that she could go far, IF. . . She can keep her arrogance in check. She feels she is superior to almost everybody and greatly despises all those of the lower castes, including those in training."
"Like that's a big deal. . ." One of the other officers muttered.
"It is around here!" Talgrun intervened. "Anywhere else, I don't care. . . But here, they are all equal, understood?" Nods were the answers he got. "Continue Kargagtha. . ."
"Where was I? Oh yes. . . Drakken. He has the greatest stamina of anybody here, including us, and although his skills with the axe were nil when we started out with training, he is now among the best. He also seems to be talented in almost all other types of combat. He might not have been able to stand up long against Kiramm during a sparring match in hand-to-hand, but he is pretty good nonetheless."
This one Talgrun remembered as well. Also one of warrior parents. "Short, very young and somewhat lean?" Talgrun simply asked.
"Yes. . . Unlike Kiramm, he doesn't have any problems with the lower castes, but he is prone to losing his cool in a tight situation. He might need some help with that. . . Oh, and although he might be very talented, he is not the brightest of them." That somewhat reminded Talgrun of the fact that most of the officer he had under his command right now were also not exactly the smartest orcs around, but he had seen worse and knew better than to be irritated by it. "Those two are mainly who I'd say stand out mostly."
Most officers seemed contend with that, but a few seemed hesitant, but none said anything. "So nobody else in particular?" He asked. Still none said anything. He turned to one of the more hesitant looking. "You. . . Anybody you think needs to be pointed out?"
"Well. . ." The officer still hesitated, feeling the pressure of all the officer looking at him. ". . . There is Kirrax."
Disapproving shouts flew through the air. "That peon is nothing special!" Was one of the things that was shouted and another was, "He's to old to still become a warrior!" There were more, but they all meant the same thing, either berating this orc for his heritage or his age. Kargagtha was amongst them as well.
"QUIET!" Talgrun shouted. "You said Kirrax. . . Why?" He asked of the same officer who had first brought the orc up. Talgrun couldn't remember anyone who went by that name, but he knew only a few of the trainees by name. He was interested, though. If that one orc could draw such divided responses from his officers. . .
"Well. . ." Again the officer seemed hesitant, but he went on nonetheless. ". . . He is absolutely gigantic, second largest orc I have ever seen. . ." A few eyes strayed towards Talgrun, as if saying Talgrun was the only orc larger than Kirrax. "he is amongst the best in all parts of training and, funnily enough, is the only one capable of beating Kiramm in hand-to-hand." Now Talgrun did remember who it was the officer spoke of.
"He is a peon and should remain such!" One of the other officers shouted and received backing of many of the other officers. And then the officers who backed the Kirrax officer joined in the argument, by starting to shout back. And from one thing, there came another.
Besides the fact that Talgrun hated the shallow mindedness of these officers, the continuous shouting didn't do good things for his headache. "SHUT THE HELL UP!" He roared. Nearly instantaneously all the officers fell silent. "Did everybody forget what I said a not so long while ago?" He stared at them all individually for a moment, daring them to say something. "Thought so. . . Now, if you have anything more to say about this Kirrax. . ."
"Uhm, yes I do. . . If not for the fact that he came from the lower castes, I'd say he already had some training sometime in the past. . . Oh and he is pretty smart to. . ." For a moment the officers again seemed ready to start arguing, but they remained silent this time. ". . . Yes, he is past thirty already, and yes, he did come from the lower castes and it will hold him back the rest of his life, but I think he nonetheless has great potential around here. . ."
"Alright, thank you. You can sit down now. . ." He let his gaze again pass over the gathered officers and then said, "I hope that by now it has gotten through your thick skulls that we are here to train all of the trainees, and not leave those of lesser heritage at the side. . . I think he made a very good point with Kirrax, that there are those of the lesser castes that are capable. Now, onto those who seem absolutely incapable. . ."
That evening proceeded without anymore incidents and not long after the meeting, Talgrun was back in 'The Sword and The Axe'. This time none of his officers had come, but he didn't care, he could use some time alone. Although now, there was nobody to hold him back on the alcohol. Drink after drink went in, and although he had a high threshold, even for orcs, the drinks began taking their effect in due time. He knew he had to many when he began feeling as if his vision was turning around. But then his mind instantly sharpened when he saw a flash of a face he shouldn't be seeing. For a moment he thought he saw Malkak walking past, who had been dead for over a month.
Thinking it was just someone who looked a lot like his dead friend, he finished his drink and looked around again. He couldn't find him anymore, but did see someone else. The bartender, that small dwarf, had somehow gotten Nielak's face. Oh! This is a dream! Talgrun thought to himself. I fell asleep at the table. But the fact that he was completely conscious discouraged that. So he shook his head and tried to look at the bartender again. Nielak's face had been replaced by the dwarf's own face again.
But now it was young Garona standing not far away from him, talking with several others. Other long dead faces began appearing. He saw Ysondra's head on another dwarf and other both possible and impossible combinations. It went on until the whole pub was filled with people he knew and who could not possibly be there. The possibility of it being a dream seemed very much more plausible than anything else he could think of. He tried pinching himself and even went as for as jabbing a fingernail into a small wound he had caught whilst training the trainees, drawing blood. Nothing would change though. He didn't wake up. Nothing at all. The faces stayed. It is not a dream! He thought slightly desperate and greatly unnerved.
The possibility that he was going crazy suddenly seemed very. . . Possible. He quickly got up and, unsure whether he had paid for the drinks already, put several coins of silver on the bar near the bartender. Avoiding looking at people as much as he could, he made it back to his house, quickly stored away his armour and plunged himself onto his bed.
Every night the urge to get the crystal out of the small chest was there, but this night it was even greater. "I don't need you!" He shouted at the crystal. "I just need to stop drinking. . . That's all. No more than two pints a day for me from now on. . ."
Sleep was definitely harder to get this night, but he nonetheless got at least some, before Kargagtha came to wake him as she always did early in the morning since they started the training.
But sleep hadn't driven away his waking nightmare. While Kargagtha's voice was still the same, her face had been replaced by that of the dead paladin Derrington. Hoping it would go away soon, he went about the day as normal. Fortunately he could still recognise people by their voice and clothing/armour. But the continuous reminding of the death of people he knew well in a lot of cases slowly got to him. When he saw his own father's head on the body of a young trainee, something snapped. I have to get away from here! Somewhere without people!
Walking over to Kargagtha/Derrington, he gave her instructions for the rest of the day and then walked away in a way that he hoped didn't attract attention. His excuse, that he 'needed to take care of something which couldn't wait', didn't seem to have been sufficient to fully convince Kargagtha, but she hadn't protested. One of the advantages of being a 'champion'.
He quickly made his way to the edge of the encampment. His plans to make a quick get away from the encampment were almost destroyed when a guard, wearing the sucked dry face of Krizslak, confronted him. While fighting against the urge to show his disgust at the sucked dry face of the guard/Krizslak, he quickly made up an excuse and hoped for the best. Surprisingly, the guard let him pass without further questions.
Wasting no time, he raced away from the encampment. Once he was certain that he was somewhere where he wouldn't be bothered by anyone, he sat down in a completely open spot, purposefully avoiding the nearby tree. The realization that he didn't have anything to drink with him didn't bother him.
The hottest part of the day hadn't come yet, and already the heat was tremendous. As far as he could tell the truly hot season of the year was approaching fast. Even though his armour was supposed to remain cool, even in warm situations, it soon felt like a sauna. But he didn't take it of. He stayed put.
In a sort trance he tried to clear his mind. Tried to find a way to get rid of his burdens. He heard a lot of things were going on around him, but he realized it was his own mind playing tricks on him. For how could there possibly be a beach in the middle of the Barrens where there hadn't been one before. The delirious part of his mind kept playing such impossible tricks on him, while the other, sane part, tried to close itself of. His mind felt broken while at the same time working at a pace he had never experienced before. Or at least that was what he felt.
That day ended and became night, but he stayed put, not moving a muscle, while trying to put his thoughts in order.
But eventually the night ended as well and became another hot day. The sun quickly replaced the cold of the night with the heat of day.
"What are you doing out here?" A strange voice asked him. He had been sitting in the baking Barrens sun for hours already that day, head turned towards the sun, but eyes closed. As he looked towards the source of the voice, he felt his eyelids had become burned by the sun. And as he spoke, he felt his lips had cracked from drought. There stood a skeletal figure wearing armour not to far away from him. It's form wavered as if it were a ghost, or a figment of his imagination.
Despite his initial disgust of the skeletal figure, he quickly noticed it wasn't wearing the head of anybody he had ever known, putting him strangely at ease. Although, he felt as if he did know this particular person although he couldn't remember who. The skeletal structure suggested it was either a tall and lanky human, or a variation of elf. "Do I know you?" He asked.
"No, for I am but a figment of your imagination." It's voice seemed completely intact, even though there was nothing that could produce the sound, it's bones had been picked clean completely. The figure approached and sat down next to Talgrun. For a moment the skeleton leaned back as if enjoying the sunlight and then turned back towards Talgrun.
"So. . . You're here because I put you here."
"No, I am not here at all. I am your creation, a figment of your imagination. You are talking to air."
"And does this particular bit of air know why I am talking to this particular bit of air?" From this distance Talgrun could see these were definitely the remains of an elf, for the armour suggested such. One of the elves from across the ocean, not a night-elf.
"Well, I am supposed to look like no one you know. At least not anybody you know personally."
"It's a bit hard for me to recognise you when you're just bones."
"That's the point."
Slowly it dawned on Talgrun that he had indeed seen this particular pile of bones before. The armour in particular reminded him of it. "I do know you!" And as he recognised the skeleton, he immediately disliked it. "You're the one I found that crystal on. You were the owner of it before I was."
"Indeed."
They remained silent for a while, the sun continuing to burn upon Talgrun's skin, while the phantasm did not even create a shadow on the ground. Eventually Talgrun said, "Well? Aren't you supposed to suggest I head back to encampment and continue normal life?"
"I could. . . But you already thought of that yourself. . ."
"Then what?!"
"How about. . . You stop living in the past and start living in the present, and start thinking about the future, instead of continuously thinking about everybody who died, in the past."
"Easier said than done."
"Yes, but not impossible. You did so before."
"That was years ago, and I had less death resting on my shoulders."
"Still, you can't keep sitting here as if you're the last orc in existence. . . There is no way you can forget what happened in the past, it will always be with you--"
"Like I don't know that! Look! I am old enough to have given that speech many times myself."
"Did anybody ever give it to you?"
"You just did. . ."
"Then get on with your life! Get your ass of the ground and back where it belongs, so you can get on with making the lives of those trainees miserable." It remained silent for a while. Then, as if it had decided it's job was done, the figment of his imagination disappeared. It's voice continued echoing in his head, though.
"I might just do that. . ." He said after the ghost was long gone.
It didn't take him long to get back to the encampment. The first thing he noticed was the fact that everybody had the correct heads again, reassuring him that he had indeed succeeded in what he had tried to do. He felt great thirst and hunger, but he had suffered through worse in the past and decided he would first go to see how his officers had held up during his absence. When he arrived at the training area he saw that everybody was going about there business as if they didn't even need him.
Unnoticed, he stepped up besides Kargagtha, who was supervising several trainees sparring with fake wooden axes. "What! Where have you been?!" She asked surprised, seemingly having momentarily forgotten a difference in rank.
"I don't need to clarify myself to you. . ." He told his subordinate, who seemed puzzled at that, but otherwise thought better than to protest. "How have you held up so far?"
She hesitated, as if still wanting to ask where he had been, but eventually just said, "When you didn't show this morning, I improvised and--" She interrupted herself to give one of the trainees the advice to watch his right side "--and decided to take some time for combat exercises."
"Good, good. So no time wasted?"
"None at all."
"Good, I'll take over from here."
When the day had almost ended, new lists of trainees were brought to him. They would start the next day and would need the space to do so. He made the lead training officers aware of that fact and then cut the day short, deciding the trainees had deserved a longer night of rest after many long days of training. There was no visit that evening to 'The Sword and The Axe', which greatly surprised several of the officers, who seemed to be eager to hear some sort of explanation for his absence.
The next day started out as nothing special. No tricks of the mind plagued him, no hangovers wrecked his head and the death of the past was pushed all the way to back of his mind where it would remain. He felt better, saner, but also felt different in another way. Just how and in what way he couldn't tell.
He was making sure the new officers and trainees were not making to much of a mess of things when a familiar person appeared at the top of a hill. The man beckoned for him to come closer. Quickly finishing up the thing he had been talking about with one of the new lead officers, he stepped towards the human.
"You look terrible Talgrun!" It was the first comment he had gotten on his burned skin and cracked lips from his sitting in the sun to long, none of his officers had dared say anything about it.
"What are you doing here, William? Don't you have duties to attend to." Now he also saw that Björn had been standing there as well, but the hill had made it impossible to see him before. "And you. . ."
"Yes, we do have duties, but not today, I made sure of that." William muttered an explanation.
"Thing is. . ." Björn said when William seemed to take a long time think of what to say next. "We were wondering how you were doing. . ."
Talgrun immediately felt suspicious. He didn't know either of them for being the type that would go to someone just to ask how they were. "Kargagtha didn't happen to put you up to this?"
"No, no, why would you think that?" William quickly said, to quickly.
"She did?"
"No!"
"So she did. . ."
Alright! She did. . ." William finally admitted. "She saw me in the pub last night and she knew you and I went back a while and figured I might be able to talk to you."
"Thing is, you have been drinking a lot lately." Björn said quickly.
"I didn't last night, and I wont be doing a lot of it from now on. . ." Talgrun quickly countered.
"Really?" William asked surprised.
"Yes, I am fine, I don't need a check up." He smiled, in an attempt to put them at ease.
"Then what about the fact that you left for a whole day without telling anybody where you were going?."
"Uhm, yeah. That might have seemed strange, but it wont happen again."
"Really?"
"Yes, really."
"So you're fine?" Björn asked.
"Yes, I, AM, FINE! Now stop asking! Unlike you, I do have. . . Things. . . To do. . . Today. . ." Something had caught his eye as it moved through the encampment some distance away.
"Are you sure?" William asked suddenly very suspicious of Talgrun's sanity.
"Yes. . ." Talgrun answered without really paying attention.
William followed the orc's eyes and saw what it was Talgrun was looking at, Björn did the same soon after. "So that's what night-elves look like. . ." Björn muttered. "I heard they are giving some of our troops up in the north in Ashenvale a hard time. From the descriptions I thought they'd be taller though."
It was a small group of night-elves. They were escorted by quite a lot of orcs and several tauren, amongst which was Walken, and they looked to be in bad shape. "Uhm, Talgrun. . ." William started carefully. "You're staring."
"I know. . ." Talgrun said quickly. He wasn't looking at the night-elves as a group anymore, but more at one in particular. One who seemed to be in a particularly bad shape and was being carried by two other night-elves. He would have to find some way to find out what they were doing here, they were supposed up in the north, being a nuisance to the Horde/Alliance forces in Ashenvale. But they were certainly not supposed to be here. He regretted having to admit to himself that he hadn't given them to much thought lately, but he had been busy. Maybe he could find a way to get to them, he did after all, speak their language.
A/N: R&R people.