AN: First of all the reviews for the last chapter were AMAZING. I wasn't expecting such a huge reaction but I'm glad you all seemed to enjoy it so much. You know how much I love reading all your reviews—and I do read every one! These ones especially made me smile, way down deep in my happy place :) I'm glad I have such awesome readers. Thank you all!

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BPOV

I woke up with a raging headache and surrounded by a man who smelled like sin. He was still asleep, his long lashes fanned across his cheeks and those sex-fantasy lips of his slightly parted. The touch of drool crusted at the corner of those lips took a little bit away from the sex-fantasy part but it added a boyish vulnerability and a realism that only made him that much more appealing. His forehead was pressed against mine as if even in his sleep he'd sought to be as close to me as possible. His arms were locked around me and my legs were twisted up in his. For a long time I laid there and simply watched him, basking in the warmth and safety of his arms and wondering how this magnificent man had come to want me in his life.

When the vice around my heart became too painfully tight I rolled carefully out of his embrace and sat up on the edge of the bed, gingerly taking my head in my hands as the throbbing flared from a Shirley Temple tap number to a full-out twenty man Irish Riverdance. Angie was still snoring softly on the bed across from me, looking even smaller than usual in the oversized SpongeBob pajamas she'd borrowed from Ben. Poor thing was going to be in far worse condition than even I was considering how much tequila she'd downed in her enthusiasm over her first PJ and Cuervo night. My eyes fell on the cups of water and aspirin laid out on the table and my heart melted just a little bit more even as I greedily downed my share. Could anyone that thoughtful and generous even be real?

I shifted slowly to look at Edward again, helpless not to note how cute he looked in his rumpled clothing and sleep-mussed hair. He was bound to wake up soon. It was almost eight already and we had a full day scheduled ahead of us, and with his position I knew Edward's schedule was likely to be even fuller than ours. Considering how seriously he took his responsibilities I was surprised he'd even stayed the whole night. He was going to be tired today.

I knew there were several ways I could play this morning. It would be very easy to blame last night on the alcohol and claim ignorance. It wouldn't take much to convince him that I didn't remember any of it. The fact was, though, that I remembered everything. I'd certainly been more drunk than I'd thought at the time, telling Edward all the things that I'd refused to admit even to myself, but not so drunk that there were any blank spots in my memory. I remembered everything I had said and done (some things with a cringe—fuck, had he really caught us watching porn?) as well as the respect and gentleness with which Edward had treated me. I should regret the outburst, knowing I had just taken a large bite out of the fruit of the forbidden tree, but somehow all I felt was….relieved. I felt purged.

So, no, I would not be claiming ignorance. It was time to stop running from my feelings.

I sat there, staring at the object of my desire and knowing that I could no longer live in denial. I hadn't wanted to feel this way again and there were so many reasons why it couldn't work but the feelings were there and if Edward was ready to overlook all the obstacles then maybe so should I. Because this wasn't just a crush or an attraction. Had I said last night that I could love him? I was well past the could be stage and quickly hurtling toward the crash landing at the bottom of that particular hill. I'd come to that realization last night when Edward had stopped the physical attack I'd launched on him because he didn't want to risk me regretting it in the morning.

The simple fact was I would not have regretted it.

I'd known that when he stopped our lovemaking just as I knew it now. Even if last night had turned out to be a onetime affair, if Edward had walked away from it and not looked back, I would not have regretted it. I'd have been devastated certainly, but I would not have regretted giving myself to him. That was how I knew I was long past the point of no return and when I had finally admitted it to myself. I had no idea what might happen next or how this could possibly work but I wasn't going to resist it any longer. That was the one thing I knew now I would end up regretting. One day I would look back on my life and wonder what I might have had had I not let fear stand in the way. I didn't want to be that girl anymore—the coward, the weakling who let her fears control her life.

Old Bella would not have cowered. She'd have hesitated, weighed the pros and cons, thought out the ramifications of her decision, but she would not have cowered and bowed to her fear. Once upon a time I'd been stronger than that—wary but still willing o take chances. I wanted that feeling back. I missed the me I used to be. Until this point I hadn't realized how very far I'd drifted from that person. Edward made me want to be strong again.

I reached out to brush a lock of hair from his forehead. My hand froze as Edward's eyes snapped open and he regarded me warily for a moment. I smiled tentatively and then his face broke out into a grin and he took my wrist, bringing my hand to his mouth to press his lips against my palm.

"Good morning, Beautiful."

I laughed self-consciously. His voice was even sexier in the morning—deeper and more gravelly. I on the other hand probably had bloodshot eyes and hair sticking out all over the place.

"I must look like a wreck."

His eyes scanned down my body, still clad in the worn and childish pajamas I'd had since I was ten, before settling again on my face.

"You look unbelievably desirable. How do you feel?"

"That depends. Is the room throbbing or is that just me?"

"That bad?"

I shrugged. "I've had worse. Nothing a long shower and a hot breakfast won't fix."

"They serve breakfast buffet style in the main dining room from seven to ten, or if you'd rather order room service you're welcome to put in on my—"

"The dining room will be just fine."

It was one thing to give up my struggle against the irresistible pull between us but quite another to allow myself to become too reliant on him or indebted to him in any way. I wasn't about to let him start picking up all my tabs or paying my expenses. He shifted into a sitting position, his eyes dropping as he nodded his head before once again lifting them uncertainly to my face.

"So how much…I mean what do you…"

"Remember from last night?"

He simply stared at me wide-eyed and seemed to wait. I steeled my resolve and held his gaze.

"I remember all of it."

His breath blew out and I realized he must have been holding it. The fact that he was also nervous somehow seemed to calm my own nerves a little. Neither one of us appeared too sure of how to handle the situation but I was glad to know I wasn't the only one who cared enough to be anxious over it.

"Bella, I want you to know I meant what I said last night—despite how my actions may have implied otherwise. I want you, obviously, but if friendship is all you're ready for…"

I shook my head as he trailed off.

"I meant what I said, too," I admitted, staring at the fingers I was twisting in my lap. "I have very strong feelings for you and it was so hard to try to push you away but then I did and you were gone and I was miserable. I don't want to push you away anymore."

"So…you want more than friendship?"

"I want to try."

He scooted closer and cupped my face in his palm, bringing my eyes up to meet his. There was a brightness, a sort of banked excitement in his eyes that I found simultaneously exhilarating and terrifying. The very intensity of our emotions at this moment was threatening to overwhelm me and a part of me still wanted to run from it and hide in the safety of denial. There was another part of me though, the idealistic part that had always wanted to believe in fairy tales and happy endings which I thought had died a painful death at James's hands, who was just beginning to reawaken and make her presence known. And she wanted to strip down and roll around naked in that intensity.

"Are you sure? I don't want you to feel rushed just because—"

"Edward. I want to try."

He closed his eyes and pressed his head against mine. "Say it again."

"I want to try."

"No, not that part."

"Edward?"

He smiled softly, like one does when hearing a particularly beautiful piece of music. "I can't believe how wonderful that sounds. Just hearing you say my name…"

My smile widened. "Edward."

His eyes opened and he grinned boyishly back at me. "I'll never get tired of hearing it."

I cocked an eyebrow. "Even when I'm 'screaming it'?"

His eyes darkened and that cocky smirk I loved played over his lips again. "Especially when you're screaming it."

"You should know…"

"Yes?"

"If we hadn't stopped last night…"

"Yes?"

"I wouldn't have regretted it. At all."

He leaned in and lightly touched his lips to mine. "That's good to know, but our first time together is going to be a lot more special than that."

"I don't need candles and roses, you know."

"Maybe I do."

I laughed. "Edward—"

Edward leaned farther in, caging me in with his arms and hovering over me so that I was forced to lean my weight back on my hands. I shivered at the feel of his breath whispering over my ear.

"It's going to be memorable, Bella. I need you to see how amazing I think you are." He began nibbling kisses along my jaw and down my throat. "When I make love to you" kiss "it's going to be so much more than just a meeting of bodies." Kiss kiss. "I'm going to" kiss "worship" kiss "every last" kiss "inch" kiss "of you."

My head fell back in surrender and my hands nearly gave out from under me. Suddenly I was feeling the need to be worshiped.

"God, Edward."

I could feel him smiling against my throat, and then there were bells chiming. Literally. I frowned at the soft music suddenly filling the room. Edward drew back and dug his phone out of his pocket.

"You slept with that in your pocket all night?"

He shrugged.

"And you set Claire de Lune as your alarm?"

He glanced up. "You know classical music?"

"I liked to have it playing when I was studying, which was all the time so….yeah. Debussy always worked best for me."

"See? I knew we were meant to be. He's my favorite composer."

"I'm sure we're not the only two people in the area who like Debussy."

"Perhaps not but you have to admit it's not a common phenomenon in our generation. It's just one more connection we share."

I bit my lip, both excited to have something else in common with him but worried that he was building me up in his mind when the reality of me would most certainly fall short of the fantasy. How would he react when he discovered I wasn't as perfect as he seemed to believe me to be? Edward's thumb pressed against my lip, freeing it from my teeth so that he could bend down and nip on it himself.

"You know what that does to me," he whispered. "What were you thinking about?"

"I just…I don't want you to think I'm this perfect woman cause I'm not, I'm so far from it—"

"Bella, stop. I don't think you're perfect, no one is. But I do think you're incredible. You need to have more faith in yourself. You are amazing. Give me time and I'll prove it to you."

I nodded. Not that I really believed he would prove to me how amazing I was. Given time it was more likely that he would see how truly unremarkable I was, but at this point I'd already surrendered to my feelings and I would take all the time I could with him.

He glanced at the clock on his phone.

"I need to get going. I'm supposed to meet Carlisle at nine. We'll talk more later, okay?"

He leaned in to kiss me, his tongue invading my mouth and short-circuiting the connections in my brain so that I forgot my anxieties, my insecurities and even my concern over my morning breath until I just became a mindless puddle of hormones. He'd released my lips and was halfway to the door before I regained my wits.

"Wait, stop! Don't open that door!"

He paused, his hand on the doorknob. "What's the matter?"

"I have to check the hallway, make sure no one's out there first. It could be really bad if anyone sees you leaving here at this time of the morning."

I jumped up and rushed past him, standing on my toes to look out the peephole. I couldn't see much of the hallway but the part around the door at least was clear. When I turned back to Edward he was regarding me with an unreadable expression.

"Are you that embarrassed to be seen with me?" he asked quietly.

"What? No! Of course not. But it's—I mean you're you and I'm just, we're not—it's a company retreat and the policies—people will talk and then—"

He shook his head to cut off my incoherent babbling.

"Don't ask me how but somewhere in that disjointed response I understood what you were getting at. It's something else we'll have to talk about and figure out." His hands rubbed up and down my arms and settled on my shoulders. "I'm just glad we're finally being open and honest with each other."

I cringed a little, thinking of all the things I still hadn't told him, still wasn't ready to tell him. I'd only just allowed myself to let him close. I didn't want to scare him away already. I wanted to enjoy at least a little time with him first, then….maybe then I could talk about it.

And somehow find a way to carry on if he decided I was too irreparably damaged for him to fix.

Edward took my hand and squeezed it. "Just promise me one thing before I go."

I looked up at him. "What's that?"

"Don't overthink this while I'm gone. It's not a mistake, I promise you. We'll take things one step at a time and figure it out together."

I nodded, wondering how he knew I would have spent the whole day analyzing the situation to pieces and trying to ride out my anxiety over it without the assistance of the Valium I'd intentionally left in my drawer at work.

"I'll try."

"Okay." He cupped my face and pressed his lips hard against mine in another kiss—this one fervent and primal and just a little bit desperate and left me feeling out of breath and just as disoriented as the soft, tender one he'd bestowed on me minutes before.

"Don't change your mind about this. Please, God, don't change your mind."

I shook my head and stammered out some kind of negative response, then turned and walked straight into the door. Edward's musical chuckle rang out behind me before he took me gently by the shoulders, nudged me away from the door, and pulled it open for me. I shook myself out of my daze and poked my head out into the hallway, looking up and down the hall to make sure it was clear.

"Okay, it's empty, go quick! Take the stairs, they're faster and you shouldn't run into anyone."

Edward laughed. "Are you trying to make me feel like a seventeen year old sneaking out of a girl's bedroom window, or is that just a bonus?"

"No jokes right now! Go, quick, before someone comes out and sees!"

I pushed him a bit for emphasis and he laughed harder, swooping down to plant a noisy kiss on my cheek before turning and jogging down the hallway. I didn't let out a breath of relief until he'd made it to the stairwell and was safely out of sight. Then I closed my door and sagged weakly against it. What the hell was I doing? Was I insane? This could only lead to heartbreak. Did I really think I could handle another devastation of that magnitude….another failure?

I shook the thoughts away. Not even five minutes and I was already breaking my promise to Edward. I'd told him I wouldn't second guess it, so I wouldn't. I was going to move forward through the day and just take this one day at a time. I was going to give it a chance. Edward deserved that much. Ideserved that much, James be damned. Just because he had found me wanting didn't mean Edward would.

I jumped into the shower and spent a long time in there just let letting the hot water cascade over my face and clear my head. I focused on the feel of the water slapping against my face and the familiar scents of my strawberry shampoo and lavender soap, refusing for once to allow my mind to drift. I wasn't going to think today. Thinking usually led to worrying and doubting, both of which I was banning from today's activities. It would be a non-thinking day. I smiled beneath the stinging spray of the water. I'd forgotten how relaxing a long, hot shower could be when you simply allowed yourself to enjoy it.

When I finally emerged from the bathroom Angela was still lying in bed but had pulled one of the pillows over her face and was holding it in place with both arms. Feeling refreshed and lighter than I had in a long time I pried one of the corners up and laughed at the glare she gave me.

"Welcome back to Earth, sweetie. Ain't it a bitch?"

She groaned. "Why's it so bright?"

"Cause it's nine o'clock in the morning and we have an eastern facing room."

"Stupid East," she mumbled. "Doesn't it ever sleep in?"

"Not last time I checked. Your eyes won't adjust to the light unless you actually remove the pillow from your face, you know."

"Light is overrated. I like the darkness. I'm thinking about moving there."

"Okay, well, while you're lying there bemoaning your fate there's aspirin and water on the table here and there's bound to be fresh coffee in the dining hall. If you can get your butt up in time to make it to breakfast, that is.

"Coffee…." She sighed. "The Essence of Life. Must. Have."

"The first step is relinquishing the pillow."

"Do you think they'd protest too much if I just took it with me?"

"Well it'd be interesting seeing you try to eat around it. I think I have a pair of sunglasses in my purse, though, if you want them."

She dragged the pillow from her face, squinting her eyes into narrow slits. "Ugh. Too obvious. I'll just have to suffer through it. It can't last all day, right?"

I smirked and waved my hand at the mostly depleted bottle of Cuervo. "I don't know, I think you consumed your own body weight in tequila last night. You may be down for the weekend."

"Just have them bring the stretcher and roll me out. I think I'm done for."

"In that case can I have your collection of PEZ dispensers?"

"You're evil. PJ and Cuervo night was evil. This was all just an evil master plan to get your hands on my PEZ dispensers."

"You've caught us. Alice and I invented PJ and Cuervo night for the sole purpose of obtaining the PEZ dispensers."

"I knew you were jealous of those. Last night was fun, though, wasn't it?"

"It really was. You can always count on Alice's crazy ideas."

Angela sat up slowly and popped the aspirin into her mouth, washing it down with small sips of water. She frowned down at her glass for a moment then looked up at me.

"Was Edward here last night?"

"Um…yeah he, uh, he was."

"Really? That was real? I can't believe you actually called him! So what does this mean? Are you guys…?"

I bit my lip, unsure how much to tell her and whether or not saying anything to her would be a betrayal to Edward. We hadn't discussed how we were going to play this at work or who we were going to let in on the secret, but this was Angela. I knew I could count on her confidence, and I really needed someone to talk to.

"We haven't really talked about the details yet but I think so. I mean, when he left this morning—"

"This morning? He stayed the night?"

I blushed. "Not like that….really. I passed out, I think, and he was just still there when I woke up…."

"Awww! That's so sweet! I'm so glad you guys are finally working this out. Edward's such a good guy and he's clearly crazy about you and you guys are going to be so cute together!"

"You can't say anything to anyone. I mean, it has to be kept kind of quiet what with work and all…"

"Oh, goodness, of course I won't. I can only imagine how those witches like Jess or Lauren would react to news like that. They'd be out for blood."

"You don't think it's wrong? I'm basically getting involved with my boss. It's completely against policy."

"Bella, I'm not going to judge you for that. There are more important things than what position you each hold in the company, and I know you better than to think you would ever use that to your advantage. Besides, technically he's no more your boss than Rose or Jasper is. Carlisle is the boss."

"That's what Edward keeps saying."

"He's a smart guy."

I smiled, finally beginning to get excited about this as the reality of it set in. "He is, isn't he? And kind and thoughtful and full of integrity—"

"And extremely hot."

"Yeah, um…yeah. God, what does he see in me?"

"Bella, stop. He sees a beautiful, intelligent, kind and thoughtful woman who's full of integrity. Stop fighting this, you guys are perfect for each other. Now, if you don't mind I'm going to go get my shower so we can get on with the coffee and the greasy food."

"Right, of course, go."

I spent the time while Angela was in the bathroom considering what she had said and everything that had happened in the past twenty-four hours. I was still unsettled about the professional side of mine and Edward's relationship—I would have been even if I didn't have the history I had—but it seemed I was the only person to whom it was a big deal. If everyone else I knew was prepared to make light of it then perhaps I should take a page from their book and do the same. Even if my stomach still quivered at the thought of the damage that could be done to my career if things ended badly. For the moment I would simply stick to my resolve not to think or worry about it.

I'd be lying if I said I wasn't still terrified of Edward's eventual rejection. It was a constant shadow in the back of my mind, but it was only a week since I had determined to no longer be James's victim and I knew that was what he wanted for me—to be terrified and alone. There wasn't much I could do about being terrified but I didn't have to be alone. Right now Edward wanted me and perhaps that wouldn't last forever but I was done letting my fear keep us apart. I'd thought myself in love with James but already my feelings for Edward were so much more intense than anything I'd ever felt for James, both physically and emotionally, and if nothing else this past week had taught me that losing Edward in the future could not be any more painful than intentionally driving him away now. If I was bound to feel the pain either way then I may as well make the most of what time I had with him.

So fear or no fear I was going to give us a chance.

Angela spent a short fifteen minutes in the bathroom, coming out fully dressed with her damp hair pulled back into a ponytail, and we made our way down to breakfast. I noticed there were a lot of bleary-eyed people in the dining hall medicating themselves with coffee and food. Edward was not there, but then I hadn't expected him to be. I didn't think he and Carlisle would have their breakfast meeting among all the other employees.

I made myself a very large coffee, piled a bagel and some fruit onto a small plate, and found an empty table to sit at. Angela joined me a few minutes later, her plate heaping with eggs, sausage, fried potatoes, biscuits and jam and several strips of bacon. The sight of it alone had my stomach roiling.

"Are you really going to eat all that?" I asked in disbelief.

Angie shrugged, already halfway through a piece of bacon.

"You weigh like ten pounds. How the hell can you eat like that?"

"103 pounds and it's all metabolism. Believe me, if I could put on more weight I would. It'd be nice to actually be able to fill out a dress."

"How do you even have an appetite after drinking as much as you did last night? Maybe you should take it easy. You don't want to throw up in front of everyone..."

Angela started to shake her head, then flinched and pressed a hand to her temple.

"Drinking always makes me hungry and greasy food is the best cure for a hangover. Besides, I never miss an opportunity to do this..."

I watched her slather a generous amount of jelly onto a biscuit and bite into it with relish as she stared somewhere over my shoulder. I turned and saw Lauren with a single cup of yogurt and Jessica nibbling on a granola bar, both of them glaring at Angela with jealous animosity. I smirked and turned back to Angela.

"Angela, I'd never have expected such spite from you. Alice and I must be corrupting you. I think I like it."

I stole some bacon off her plate and made a show of shoving it into my mouth and then licking the grease off my fingers. I'd only made it to my second piece before Jessica and Lauren finished their "breakfast" and left the room, snubbing their noses at us on their way out. Angela and I both burst into laughter with Angela groaning and clutching her head in the process. We finished our own meal with three hours to burn before the group activities began. We were discussing what to do with the time when my phone alerted me to a text message.

What do you have planned for the morning, Gorgeous? ~ E

I blushed and glanced furtively around before reflexively hiding my phone under the table to text him back. Angela smiled and rolled her eyes at me.

I don't know yet. We were just trying to figure that out. ~ B

Meet me at the stables? Angela's welcome too of course. ~ E

I chewed my lip, wanting to agree but remembering how Angela had been too terrified of the horses to even enter the stables with me yesterday.

"Just go with him," Angela said when I showed her the texts. "I kind of wanted to lie down again anyway."

"You don't have to do that just for me, Ang. Maybe I can talk him into doing something else with us, like checking out one of the hiking trails. Or the observatory."

"No, really," she insisted, "it's perfect. I really do still have a major headache but I didn't want to leave you on your own at your first retreat. This works out for everyone. I can rest for a while and you can get in the horseback ride I know you were wanting."

"Are you sure? It doesn't seem fair to leave you behind…"

"It's only a couple of hours, Bella, and I really could use the rest before our volleyball match at one."

I groaned. "Don't remind me. I still can't believe you talked me into that. I'm a safety hazard on the volleyball court."

"Oh, you'll be fine, it's not like we're competing for anything. It's just a 'bonding experience'." She threw up the air quotes as she said that. "Now go enjoy your Edward time while I try to sleep off the rest of last night's tequila. I'll see you around one."

Angela took her tray up and headed back toward the elevators. I fired off a quick text to Edward agreeing to meet him and made my way to the stables. I was nervous about meeting him, still not entirely sure how to conduct myself around him. After months of forcing myself to view him as only my boss treating him as a boyfriend was going to take a little getting used to. I didn't have much boyfriend experience to begin with and what little I had...well it wasn't really anything to go by, was it?

When I walked into the stables I was surprised to see most of the stalls empty already and none of the tour guides in sight. At first I didn't see Edward either and my apprehension jumped to near panic level as all those old feelings of abandonment began rising to the surface again. I forced myself to breathe again when I heard his voice coming from several stalls down to the right. I was going to have to deal with these feelings on a regular basis now that I was once again exposing myself to the vulnerabilities of the heart, but I'd known that when I made my decision this morning to unlock that door. I was just hoping that I would be strong enough to handle it.

I followed Edward's voice and found him inside a stall talking to an older man who was grooming the horse. Edward caught sight of me, his eyes lighting up as he smiled at me, and I no longer hoped. I knew. I would be strong enough to handle all the private demons I'd locked away because the feelings that Edward evoked in me far outweighed the hurts and fears that lingered inside my heart. I couldn't take the good without the bad and I definitely wanted the good.

I smiled back and took the hand he held out to me, allowing him to draw me in close to his side. It felt right, so very right, to stand there like that with him and I wondered how I had fought against this for so long.

"Bella, this is Miles Kemp. He's been in charge of the stables for the past thirty-eight years. He's agreed to let us take a couple of the horses out on our own on one of the private trails if that's okay with you."

"Mind you, I said if the lady can ride you're welcome to two of my mounts but I can't be having no newbies out without supervision. Ain't no one breaking their necks under my watch."

I grinned at the endearingly crotchety old man. "I can ride. I won't break my neck, I promise."

Miles grunted and tenderly patted the horse he'd been brushing. "This here's Delilah. She's a gentle one. You can take her. Edward, I got either Sandy or Harvey available for you."

"I'll take Harvey."

"Thought you might. I'll get 'em saddled for ya, meet me in the paddock."

Edward led me out into the enclosure and continued to hold my hand until Miles brought the horses out. I glanced around, nervous that other employees might see us, but there was no one else around so I left my hand where it certainly enjoyed being. Edward offered me a hand with getting up on Delilah which I smirked at before slipping my foot into the stirrup and swinging myself onto her back. It had been some time since I'd been on a horse but it was one of those things that just came right back to you. Edward chuckled and gracefully mounted his own horse. I noticed that we were both on palominos but his was probably a good two hands taller than mine.

I followed Edward's lead out of the gate and onto a trail with no signs or markings. After a minute or two the trail widened enough that I could bring Delilah up so that we were ambling side by side. I looked over at Edward and found the sight of him seated on that horse more erotic than I probably should have.

"Is Angela okay? I thought she'd come with you."

"She was feeling pretty rough this morning, said she wanted to sleep it off some more. Plus she's terrified of horses."

"Is she? I never knew that. Well, in any case I'm glad to have you to myself. I wasn't sure you'd know how to ride." He smiled at me. "I'm a little disappointed I don't get to teach you. Where'd you learn?"

"Renee worked at Ponderosa Stables down in Phoenix for a year and I got free lessons out of the deal. I liked it so she let me keep taking them after she'd moved on to her next job."

"Did your mother change jobs like that often?"

"Oh, she was forever trying to find 'her calling'." I laughed with fondness at one such memory that popped into my head. "At one point she went through this pottery phase where she made the ugliest vases you've ever seen and sold them out of our garage. I think the crazy cat lady down the street was the only person who ever bought one. It didn't take me long to convince her to find something a little more lucrative but she still has the pottery wheel. Last Christmas she gave me the most horrendous ashtray."

"I didn't know you smoked."

"I don't but it's just like Renee to give you something totally useless and impractical."

"Sounds like she'd get along well with Rose. I bet you keep that ashtray out somewhere in a place of honor."

I blushed and looked away, still unnerved sometimes by how well he seemed to understand me. Everyone else would have assumed that practical Bella would have done something equally practical with the ridiculous gift.

"It's on my bedside table. I keep loose change in it."

"Sentimentality's not a bad thing."

I nodded, biting my lip in mild embarassment.

"I met your mother last night," I blurted out.

Edward raised an eyebrow. "Yeah, I saw you talking to her."

"I mean, I didn't meet her last night, I've known her, but I just found out last night that she was your mom."

Fuck on a rock, why did I always seem to be babbling around this man? Elocution was usually my strong point.

"She told me. She had a lot of good things to say about you, and my mom's not that easy of a woman to impress."

"What do you mean? You're mother's wonderful! I wish—"

I stopped myself. I'd almost said I wished mine was more like her, which wasn't really true. I loved Renee and I loved the way she was and I wouldn't ever really want her to be any other way. She'd always been like a best friend to me...but I'd be to lying to say there hadn't been times when I needed a mother more than I needed a friend.

"What do you wish?" Edward enquired.

"Um, I mean what all did she say about me?"

This had the possibility o be very bad. Esme knew a lot of things about me that I wasn't ready to share with Edward...

Edward chuckled. "Nothing bad, I promise. No deep, dark secrets either. She just said how much she likes and admires you. And she all but called me an idiot for letting you mark time with that slimy bartender."

I gaped at him. Esme said she admired me? How could she after all I'd told her and with she herself being so, well, awesome?

"Bella, you are admirable. And she was right to say I was a fool for leaving you alone in that room full of predators. I am curious, though, why didn't you take the bartender's number when he gave it to you?"

"You saw that?"

"I was watching you all evening."

My face flushed again and my stomach fluttered. I hadn't known he'd been watching me. If I had I very much doubted I would have even talked to Riley. The fact was I was lonely and depressed after having been away from Edward all that time and it was nice to receive the attention. I hadn't actually flirted with a man in so long...it felt kind of good to do so with no stress or worries or hidden agendas. Harmless fun. It made me feel normal again, but then it had gotten a bit more serious when he started writing those seven digits on the napkin and I'd actually considered taking it just to see if maybe I could be normal again. But I couldn't make myself take it. He wasn't Edward.

Edward reached over to place his hand on my shoulder, bringing my attention back to him. My own nerves fled as I saw the anxiety in his eyes and I smiled softly at him.

"Because he wasn't you."

His hand tightened on my shoulder for a minute before dropping down to take mine and lift it to his lips, his eyes intense and burning into mine.

"You're an incredible woman, Bella. I'm going to see to it that you don't regret this decision—that you don't regret choosing me."

I laughed a little, reclaiming my hand so that I could take up the reigns again. "I don't seem to have much a choice where you're concerned. I just can't resist you."

The Smirk returned. "And I'm going to make sure it stays that way."

We rode on for a while after that in a companionable silence. Every now and then Edward's horse would bump into mine and we would both smile at each other. It happened so frequently that I suspected he was doing it on purpose but I didn't say anything. Playful Edward was something I didn't get to see very often. I nudged Delilah closer until her shoulder was brushing Harvey's then out of nowhere Edward was reaching over and grabbing my reigns, bringing both our horses to a halt. I looked at him questioningly and he tossed me a wicked grin. His fingers threaded through my hair as he brought my head closer.

"It's just so liberating to finally be able to do this," he murmured before his lips descended onto mine.

I leaned into the kiss, moaning a little when his tongue slid across the seam of my lips and then slipped inside my mouth. I gripped his shirt and let the sensations carry away all sense of thought and reason. He was right, there was something exciting and cathartic about finally just letting go and enjoying our connection. I didn't have to worry about apologies or excuses or self-reprisal. I could just enjoy the kiss knowing that after it ended there would be more to come, and enjoy it I did. Edward had a way of kissing all his own and it damn near turned my bones to jelly every time.

When he leaned back his eyes were glowing with heat and happiness and I was sure mine were shining back at his much the same. I still couldn't believe that I was the one to put that look on his face. He tucked a strand of hair behind my ear and his thumb swept across my cheekbone, a soft smile on his lips and his eyes still staring into mine. I stared back, transfixed. The horses shifted restlessly beneath us and the wind blew gently through the leaves. Somewhere up above a songbird chirped, a herald to the arrival of spring. In the distance were the muted sounds of other horses and the chatter of their riders, but those things didn't touch us here in this moment. Not when Edward was staring at me that way and my heart was beating erratically in my chest. It occurred to me that these were the moments that fairytales were written on, and no matter what happened in the future I would carry this moment with me always.

I was so in love with Edward Cullen.

"I'll race you to the creek," he said suddenly and then both he and horse were off.

I laughed and nudged my knees into Delilah's sides, sending her chasing after them. I wasn't going to catch them. His horse had the advantage of both size and strength over mine plus the unfair lead Edward had taken, but damn if it wasn't going to be fun trying. I rode low over Delilah's back, urging her faster, my face breaking out into the first carefree grin since...I couldn't even say. Ahead of me Edward's laughter beckoned. My hands held tight to the reigns and I basked in the certainty that I would not be dropping them.

AN: So Bella's finally making progress...but she still has a ways to go so be patient with her please. These things don't happen overnight! I hope you enjoyed this chapter, it was my first mostly angst free one. I might try to throw you some more of those but I can't always seem to help myself from throwing in a little more conflict...dun dun dun. Until next time my lovelies and thanks for reading!