So, I feel like blitzing you guys with chapters lately. Hope you like!
Arguments Between a Vampire and a Werewolf
"What will you give me?"
"Nothing. Absolutely nothing."
"You can't ask me to do this and promise nothing in return. This warrants at least, like, a few dozen donuts. Or a car."
"Just do it, Jacob. How often do I ask you to do anything?"
"All the freaking time. Jacob, get your feet off the coffee table. Jacob, stop eating so many bagels. Jacob, buy me another hairbrush and I will literally bite your face off. You pretty much only speak to me in the imperative."
"Maybe because you only act in the disruptive."
"Maybe because you never have any fun. You put a damper on any kind of fun. You are a dampire."
"And you are an unfair-wolf. Jacob, you owe me this favor six times over. It would be wrong not to do it."
"Owe you? You still owe me for last week. You know, when I went to Blockbuster for you?"
"That was an emergency."
"It was Gone with the Wind."
"We were really in the mood. And it was sunny outside. It had to be you."
"Right, wouldn't want to get your glimmer on and send the entire town running in terror."
"I am putting up with your snide comments only because I desperately need you to do this for me. Please, Jacob?"
"No! Last time, he...yelled at me. And scratched me with his nails."
"Oh, come on. It wasn't so bad."
"It was. I hated it. I wanted to die."
"You didn't want to die."
"I did! He made me feel...so small. Like a little child. A bad little child."
"I'm sure he didn't mean to make you feel that way."
"Yes he did! That's what he said. Jacob, you are a bad little child."
"He's just...competitive."
"He scares me. He scares me like dolls scare me. And war. And Rosalie in the morning."
"What if I made you macaroni and cheese?"
"Don't bring macaroni and cheese into this."
"What if I bought you an iPod?"
"A Touch, or a Nano?"
"A Nano."
"No."
"A Touch."
"No."
"What if I wrote you a song?"
"A song? Would it be about me? Would it praise me?"
"Yes. It would be very praising."
"Would you play it on the piano?"
"Every morning."
"For how long?"
"One week."
"Okay, let me think about this. Yes."
"Alright, deal. Now, you must go immediately. He's waiting."
"Right now? I...I thought I'd have some time...you know, to process."
"I'm afraid there's no time to process."
"Not even 15 minutes of processing?"
"If you want your song you're going to have to sacrifice processing."
"Okay. Okay, I'm going."
"Good."
"I...am...going."
"You're not moving."
"My legs have rejected my decision to move."
"Just go, Jacob!"
"I can't! Please, don't make me!"
"Jacob!"
"Please! I don't want to play Risk with Jasper!"
I imagine it would be terrifying, personally. CHECK OUT MY PROFILE ON FICTIONPRESS! I'm currently posting a very long story there. Don't miss it!