AN: Just watched the Doctor who finale – wow, I loved it!

Warnings and Fears

Chapter 21

Ahsoka had become so used to the pain, the medium voltage electricity had been raging through her for what felt like hours – though in reality it had been 10 minutes – she found it hard to remember what she felt like before the pain, it was scrambling her thoughts, pushing her to her mental and physical limits. She wouldn't be able to last long if this carried on.

So when the pain stopped it was an abrupt shock to her system, the fire in her veins and nerves lingered but it was somewhat dulled, could easily be ignored. She gasped, taking in the precious air that she had always taken for granted – well at the moment it was like a drug to her – she couldn't get enough.

"My sources have informed me that the Republic have the stone…" Dooku walked closer to the teenager, eying the sweat and blood covered girl with disgust. "…where are they taking it?"

"Well, since you asked so nicely…" Ahsoka lifted her head slowly, ignoring the pain that the movement brought. "…it's being taken to a little place I like to call burn-in-hell, amazing place I must say. Di'kut"

Ahsoka's spine went into spasms as the electricity was suddenly started again, this time the voltage had been increased and it ran through her like a stream of lava – burning at everything it touched – Ahsoka was in too much pain to regret her actions, too much pain to decided that insulting them probably wouldn't be the best thing to do.

Without the force the help her, Ahsoka was forced to feel every bit of the pain – she couldn't immerse herself in the depths of the force without her force sensitivity, she just…couldn't escape. She didn't get any training for this in the temple, or maybe she did but just didn't listen.

She kept in her cries, she wouldn't let them think they were breaking her; she had to keep strong to keep holding on. She kept repeating that mantra in her head but in reality she didn't know how much longer she would last for, at this rate it wouldn't be long.

Ahsoka closed her eyes as her back arched uncontrollably, jolting and spasming from the pain. When would it end?

She had to keep holding on, if not for herself then at least for those that she loved, she had to hold on so she could go back to them: Skyguy and Obi-Wan and Rex and Plo, their faces burst clearly into her mind – illuminating her thoughts and acting as lights in the darkness - as she fought to keep conscious, fought to keep going.

Once again the electricity was stopped and once again Ahsoka began to hyperventilate, spluttering slightly as the blood that hung in the dank air rushed into her lungs. One of the most unpleasant things she had ever experienced. Skyguy was right…and they had only just begun.

Ahsoka moaned in pain – the first noise she had made since her torture started – she felt the excruciating burning pain of Dooku's lightsaber ripping through her skin, and not in her wildest dreams would she ever imagine it to hurt so much. But they were surface wounds, they would heal but if she blabbed on the Republic and people got hurt…or even killed…those wounds may never heal.

"Don't you want this pain to end?" She barely heard Dooku as she began to fade in and out of consciousness; fighting to keep awake…if she fell asleep she would be vulnerable.

"The weapon?" Dooku prodded "Why does the Republic want it?"

"Do you really believe that I'm going to talk…" Ahsoka's voice wobbled a little as her eyes lolled about slightly. "…nothing you can do will hurt me anymore." She spat icily.

"Youngling I think that for your own sake you should start talking…" Bane leered at her menacingly "…it would be counterproductive to your well being to keep being so defiant."

"Listen, I don't behave for my Master so I'm certainly not going to for you."

"Its our job to get information from you…" Bane gestured to himself and Dooku "…our employer wants to know everything about this weapon, he is indeed very curious."

"And? If I seem to give a damn, please tell me. I would hate to be giving the wrong impression."

Ahsoka was prepared for the blow that swiftly greeted her face, she however was not prepared for how it knocked her head back into the table that she was strapped to, sending her into a dizzy spell and black spots danced around her eyes as she once again had to fight to stay awake.

"Watch your tongue youngling or I shall take it out."

Ahsoka shivered when he smiled at her in a threatening manner, making her insides squirm as his eyes promised more pain and discomfort in her very near future. This was so much worse than Dooku's own torture – she'd give anything for that electricity to replace Bane and his cruelty.

She was beginning to think that maybe she wouldn't get out of this one alive; maybe she would never be found. No, she scolded herself…she couldn't think like that – that's how the Sith try to break you ; she couldn't afford to have doubts in her friends – her family – she needed to be strong for them, she needed to keep going so she could go back to them and go back to how things were.

She could already imagine drinking hot chocolate back in her and her Master's quarters, she could practically smell the mystical aroma…and then the husky smell of oil and machines from the room, but she was okay with that smell – she liked it – it was her Masters smell. It was strong and safe and…home. And with those thoughts Ahsoka found more strength to keep fighting, to keep buggering on.

On the other side of the galaxy, Anakin Skywalker was sat in the Cafeteria, not eating or drinking but rather glaring into his datapad, as if he truly and honestly believed that he could scare the machine into giving him the exact location of his Padawan's whereabouts. If only it were that easy.

Anakin sat staring at the datapad, compiling a list of likely planets where the Separatist could be hiding his Padawan – so far he had every planet minus Hoth, no-one in their right mind would go there. That iceberg could not sustain life, no matter what technological advances were made in the next few years.

If he were going on those criteria's than he could cross out Tatooine as well because visiting that hell-hole was just asking for pain and suffering – some people called it masochism…he called it stupidity.

They were about an hour away from Coruscant and he had spent the entire journey researching and cross-referencing, he had to do whatever he could now so that we he got to Coruscant he could dive straight into the underworld and find information. This was a way to save time.

"Anakin" Anakin didn't notice that Obi-Wan was sat across from him until he spoke up "You look exhausted, why don't you get some sleep, I'll work on this…" He gestured to the datapad, "…running yourself into the ground won't help, it won't help you and it certainly won't help Ahsoka."

"No, no…I have to keep looking." Anakin didn't even look up from his datapad.

"Anakin, you need rest." Obi-Wan said in an authoritative tone. "Don't make me order you."

"Don't even try it, Obi-Wan" Anakin lowered the datapad slightly to glare at his former Master. "Why are you so blasé about this? You're acting like everything is so calm and cool, well it's not…my Padawan is missing, do you not realise that? Or do you just not care?"

Obi-Wan sat up in his seat and imposingly leant towards his former Padawan, lowering his voice to an angry whisper. "Do not try that with me Anakin Skywalker, I care for Ahsoka too…but I know that this will not help her, she needs someone who will be able to stay awake when they try to rescue her. So watch your mouth around me young man…" Obi-Wan pointed to the door before giving Anakin a stern expression, not seeing Anakin Skywalker, the Jedi Knight, but rather Ani, the petulant child. "…go to bed!"

"I am not a child anymore Obi-Wan."

"You are certainly acting like one."

"I have tried sleeping…" Anakin replied in an agitated tone. "…it's evading me and until my Padawan is safe it will continue to do so."

"You are going to end up killing yourself!" Obi-Wan couldn't understand what the boy hoped to gain by running himself into the ground.

"If it gets Ahsoka home safe then it'll be worth it."

"I don't believe what I'm hearing" Obi-Wan shook his head. "You need to stop blaming yourself, Anakin. It wasn't your fault!"

Anakin laughed – not an amused laugh - but rather a sinister, mocking laugh that sent chills down Obi-Wan spine. "It was entirely my fault, the whole force-damned mission was my fault…I'm responsible for this Obi-Wan."

"No you're not, Anakin." Obi-Wan tried a cheap trick but he hoped it would work. "What would Ahsoka think if she could see you? She wouldn't want you to kill yourself trying to save her."

"Well you don't know that because Ahsoka's not here, Ahsoka's been captured…she can't tell us what she'd think." Anakin slammed his hands down on the table. "Stop trying to make me feel better, it is my fault Ahsoka is missing." Anakin got up and span around, turning his back to Obi-Wan whilst running his hand through his hair.

"Why is that?" Obi-Wan got up and walked around the table, folding him arms before standing behind Anakin. "Why is it your fault? Why isn't it mine or Rex's or Alexander's, why does the blame sit solely on your shoulders?"

Anakin whirled round angrily and pointed his finger at Obi-Wan, his eyes flashing with his anger. "Because I let go of her hand." He took a shaky breath in and attempted to reign in his anger, doing some simple Jedi exercises to help himself regain control. "I let her go of her hand and now she's in pain, I heard her Master…I heard her, she was screaming…it was horrible, I can still hear her in my mind…that same tortured scream, they're hurting her Obi-Wan and I can't protect her."

"Oh, Anakin," Obi-Wan had no idea of the guilt his former Padawan had been shouldering and how he was forced to hear Ahsoka scream, no wonder the boy was losing it.

"She's in pain, Obi-wan." Anakin ran a hand through his unruly mess of hair

"Do you think avoiding sleep will change that?"

"I can't go to sleep, not because I don't want to…but because I can her hear sometimes." Anakin put his head in his hands. "It's tearing me apart Master, I can bear to hear her scream like that…she's in so much pain and it's killing her."

Obi-Wan didn't know what to do, he had never before encountered Anakin anything like this, he had never before seen the boy so…tortured, his bond with Ahsoka was causing him more harm than good at the moment, it was mentally torturing the boy. He couldn't go on like this, the boy would end up going insane and if – force forbid – Ahsoka died and that bond snapped, the whiplash from it could put Anakin into a coma.

"Ani…" Obi-Wan used his nickname to try and calm the younger man "…you need to close your connection with her, close off your bond."

"Don't ask me to do that." Anakin pointed his finger shakily at Obi-Wan. "I will not desert her like that, what I have to experience is a small price to pay."

"It's torturing you."

"And they're torturing her…like I said; it's a small sacrifice I have to make, considering whose fault it was that's she's currently there."

"You're using this to punish yourself" Obi-Wan concluded sadly. "You see this as punishment for her capture."

"A very fitting punishment if you ask me, she's being tortured and so am I." Anakin lowered his head out of shame; he had caused so much trouble. How could he possibly be the Chosen One when all he brings is death and suffering?

Perhaps being a Jedi isn't all it's cracked up to be. Despite himself Anakin let out a shaky laugh…he knew better than anyone how the Jedi are full of false promises and cocked up philosophies. They were so wrong. About attachments, about fear, about anger…about everything.

His love for Ahsoka would help him find her…he wouldn't lose the girl he cared for like a sister – a daughter even - he would not. He had an obligation as a friend, a master, a guardian and a Jedi to bring her home. He would do his duty.

AN: Hope you liked, please review