Me: Hey everyone!
Percy: WOW! Who are you?
Annabeth: It's the author duh!
Me: Yeah, I haven't been on for ages…
Poseidon: Yeah…I thought you weren't coming back
Me: Oh yeah…I was um out
Annabeth: Meaning you couldn't be bothered?
Me: NO! PSHH! HOW COULD YOU SAY THAT?
Annabeth( studies me with grey eyes): Yup! You couldn't be bothered
Me: Hey, you've been watching waaay to much The Mentalist
Annabeth: Then where have you been?
Me: NONE OF YOUR BUSINESS
Percy: When did the author start talking in capitals?
Me: NOW!
Percy: Oh…Okay!
Zeus: Just get on with the story!
"I need to get out of here!" shouted Percy, "I might never see my dad again and I'll have to live with Hade-"
"There was once a scardy kid, and Percy was his name oh! P-E-R-C-Y, P-E-R-C-Y and Percy was his name oh!" sang the girl on the couch,
"Shhh!" waved Percy madly around in case James heard and came in with the sword to quickly send Percy on his way,
"Old man James had a sword, ei ah ei ah oh! With a stab, stab there and a stab, stab there, here a stab there a stab everywhere a stab, stab. Old man James had a-"
"Help!" was all Percy managed to say in fustration,
"Do you want to escape?" sang the girl in a melodic voice,
"Yes, I do!" sang-mocked Percy,
"Stop that, copycat!" sang the girl in an unbelievably low tennor tone,
"Okay!" Percy yelped, frightened, "You watch too much High School Musical," he added
"Can Gaberellia do this?" sang the girl, "LAAAAAAA!" and it was so peircing that the wall at the back shattered leaving nothing,
"There you go! Free to go as you please!"
Percy was suspicious, "Wait, if you could do that, then why don't you free yourself?"
"Don't you get it? I live here!" she sang, reaching a perfect octave, "And also that boy with the dog, he's just here so you wouldn't be lonely!"
"What? This is too confusing!"
Meanwhile…
"Let's go back to camp!" said Annabeth gathering all the demigods togather, "After all we need to decorate Percy's cabin!"
"Luke the builder! Yes we can!" shouted Luke grinning broadly but his smile faded as he saw everyone giving him the eyebrow.
"Okay, Grover you get the tree while Thalia and Nico get the decorations and we'll all get on the sleigh and head back to camp," shouted Bianca with so much authority that everyone thought they were back in school and shouted, "Yes Miss Di Angelo!"
Everyone was on the sleigh and was prepared to launch into another concert when Grover hesitatied, "Hey has anyone seen Percy Jackson?"
"Hmm?" asked Annabeth a little annoyed as she was just about to start singing the solo bit of Santa Lucinda,
"Percy? Anyone seen him?"
"You mean Prissy? Well I bet he's off saving the world from his grandpa…dear sweet Kronos! I mean isn't he invincible now? Well I bet he won't even need us," said Clarisse a little too sarcastic and was over doing the hand gestures way too much,
"Hey!" shouted Luke, "Don't talk about Kronos like that!" but everyone ignored him since they were too busy talking about how 'great' Percy was.
"I mean he's such a great guy that someone wrote a book just on him and he's the protagonist of the whole series about how WE defeated Kronos TOGATHER!"
"Um, do I sense some jealously going on?" asked Grover tentatively, but of course everyone except Luke and Bianca ignored him.
"Jealousy...tisk tisk...we don't care cause we're dead," said Bianca bluntly,
Grover, Bianca and Luke looked at each other helplessly as their friends got more and more worked up so they decided to sing a very calming song out of Luke's Demigod Christmas handbook.
When your friends are getting angry over something at Christmas and ruining the 'Christmas Spirit' choose one of these calming tracks to help the calm down:
Danny Boy
You Raise Me Up
So Happy Togather
Love (From Robin Hood)
And in small print:
Ask your Physician if side effects and symptoms of extreme anger presists. Discontinune use if anger level rises. Use amber and musk notes if appropriate along with some hints of jasmine and lime to assists effects.
"Okay?" commented Luke, "But it's worth a try if we still want a really good Christmas TOGATHER…" he added copying the way Annabeth said it,
"So which one?" asked Bianca eyeing the options,
"Danny Boy is SOOO hard to sing," decided Grover, and at last they decided to sing Love (from Robin Hood) and if tht didn't work they decided to sing You Raise Me Up since that was one of Hades' favourite music and Luke listened to it about a thousand times when he was on 'detention' for playing pranks on serious but important dead people like George Washington, Abraham Lincon and the such.
"Love
It seems like only yesterday
You were just a child at play
Now you're all grown up inside of me
Oh, how fast those moments flee," sang Bianca while Luke pulled out a couple of neon pink lights and swished them around to resemble magical fireflies,
"Once we watched a lazy world go by
Now the days seem to fly
Life is brief, but when it's gone
Love goes on and on," Bianca sang passionately while Grover played some notes on his panpipes,
"Love will live
Love will last
Love goes on and on and on,"
Luke sweapt his random stick on a xylophone from one end to the other,
"Once we watched a lazy world go by
Now the days seem to fly
Life is brief, but when it's gone
Love goes on and on," finished Bianca while their friends seemed to go really quiet.
Meanwhile…
"Apollo! I would like you to experience the oriental uh…um experience of Asia!" Hermes announced with a glorious sweap of his hands and then he helped Apollo out of his own car like a butler.
"What are we going to do now?" asked Apollo, "I brought my yoga mat…"
"Well my friend ,to truly be calm you have to experience the food…the culture…the-"
"Yeah, yeah," interrupted Apollo, "can we just get going? I don't want to miss the Christmas party the demigods put on with special guest: Kronos!"
"What?" asked Hermes, "Isn't Kronos suppose to be a BAD guy?"
"Well my friend, when you're the bad guy it doesn't mean that you're a bad cook… Am I right? Huh? Huh?"
"Yeah I suppose his roast chicken is a bomber and not to mention his Yorkshire pudding and blueberry baguls!" admittled Hermes in the end,
"Well are we going to explore some cultures or what?" asked Apollo impatiently.
Me: Hey, what are you guys looking at?
Hermes: Oh, just the ad for Ferrerro Rocher, the one with the Greek gods in it…
Zeus: Oh look! That's suppose to be me!
Artemis: Hey look! I just shot the pyramid of chocolates with my bow and arrow!
Me: Well the gods look like they're having fun…
Percy: We should totally make one with a demigod version!
Nico: Yeah! I'll get the clothes I borrowed from Aphrodite… and we'll do it on in front of a green screen!
*Nico comes back with basket and Bianca gets video camera*
Me: This is going to be so cool! I'll be narrator! 3,2,1 ACTION!
Me (in mysterious voice): A long time ago in an ancient time…
*I zoom in on Annabeth and Thalia spinning out of control in swishy blue silk tunics and ballet shoes while luke sits on a huge, jagged icicle and rotates slowly while wearing a heavily embellished mask while grover did some gentle drumming*
Me: The gods of Olympus would gather every night…
* Bianca gets out her bow and arrow in a majestic white tunic and shoots a pinata filled with Ferrero Rochers and they come raining down on Annabeth, Thalia, Nico, Percy and luke who dances happily with garlands in their hair and classic rope sandals*
Me: And to make every night special, they had a devine secret…
*Percy sits on a throne with a fake beard and 'controls' the chocolate on a fish wire with his hands*
Me: Then one day it slipped from the heavens to be discovered by man…
*Annabeth wearing gold eye shadow accidenatlly drops it and the next shot is of luke wearing a simple toga looking down from a balcony*
Me: Discover the secret of gold…Ferrero Rocher!
Luke: It's a wrap peoples!