Disclaimer: All rights belong to Fox and David Shore.
Author's Note #1: Big thanks to my beta Ceciilee. You're simply the best! I'm bowing and chanting "I'm not worthy! I'm not worthy!"
Author's Note #2: The last two scenes are excerpts from one of my favorite House episode titled "The Three Stories." No copyright infringement is intended. The dialogues are just way too perfect to mess around with so I'm keeping it as is.
***
It's perfect summer cookout weather, the sun is shiny and the temperature is in the 70's F.
House has set the retractable awnings to cover about half of the deck, just enough to shade the outdoor dining area. Jake stocked up the cooler with ice, beer, juice and soda and begins firing-up the grill. He's in charge of the grill so he cooks some burgers, salmon, veggies, and Filipino pork barbecue (Lina marinated them especially for House).
The gathering is pretty low key with just the Cuddy-House family along with Wilson and Lina.
Everyone is seated around the outdoor dining table enjoying their meal when the phone rings. Cuddy walks into the house, answers the phone, walks back out and turns on the speakerphone.
"It's my mom; she wants to wish you both a happy birthday."
Emma greets House and her grandson a happy birthday and tells them that she bought each of them a very special gift.
Jake asks "You did?"
Cuddy hands Jake two nicely wrapped medium size boxes.
House grabs Cuddy by the waist and pulls her onto his lap and asks "Emma said I have one. Where's my gift?"
Cuddy looks at House and tells him "you can open your gift later."
House wiggles his brow and whisper "is it something sexy that you'll be wearing for me tonight?"
Cuddy gives him seductive look and whispers back "you'll have to wait and find out big boy."
House has a smug grin plastered on his face for a good few minutes as he tries to imagine what Cuddy has in store for him.
Jake asks his Nana "do you want me to open it now?"
Emma replies "yes. I hope you like them."
Jake smiles as he opens the first box to reveal a MOMO design motorcycle helmet and immediately tells his Nana that it's "totally rad." Jake opens the second box to reveals an electric shaver/trimmer kit.
Emma says "I heard from your mom that you had taken on your dad's unshaven look."
House interjects "it's a hereditary trait. Besides, his new look got him on the list of top 10 hottest men in PPTH."
Wilson rolls his eyes because House has been quoting this list since he found out that he was selected number one.
As Jake promised his mom he would take care of his grizzly bear look; unfortunately, he must have got the instruction mixed-up. Jake now sports a buzz cut which highlights his deep sea blue eyes and his chiseled cheekbones. And instead of shaving off his beard, he trimmed it to a closely cropped "designer stubble" look like his father. Because of the fact that Jake has the same build, close to same height and similar stance as his father; he is often mistaken for his father from afar. Cuddy doesn't press her son about shaving off all his facial hair since House is beaming with pride about his boy sporting his signature look. She also knows that his son has been very conscious about appearing his age. She overheard him telling his dad that people take him more seriously when they don't know his real age and his facial hair makes him look older.
Jake received a Gibson Les Paul guitar from his parents, Wilson gave him two tickets to the Monster Truck Rally, and Lina gave him a set of Filipino Christmas ornaments. John and Blythe also sent a gift package that contains a motorcycle mesh jacket/armor (great for hot summer months).
After Lina has left, Jake asks Wilson if he can give him a ride to his friend's house. House tells Jake to use one of the cars, but before he can finish his sentence, Cuddy asks House to give the twins their bath. House and Cuddy goes through their nightly routine with the twins (all abbreviated since it's about three hours pass the twins' normal bedtime).
As they enter their bedroom, House starts getting frisky with Cuddy and starts demanding his birthday gift.
Cuddy seductively says "good things come to those who wait" then walks out of their bedroom.
House thinks to himself "she probably is getting some stuff in the kitchen." He's trying to recall if there were strawberries, chocolate or whip cream in the fridge. But quickly realizes "this is Cuddy we're talking about. I'm sure she has everything prepared." He strips himself naked, slip inside the covers and patiently wait for his rewards. After about five minutes of waiting, House yells "Lise, Mr. Happy is getting impatient."
Cuddy has enlisted the help of both Wilson and Jake in planning House's surprise birthday present. The trio is now in the garage trying to quietly sneak the 'secret contraband' in place.
Upon hearing House's voice, Wilson asks Cuddy "he name his penis Mr. Happy?"
Cuddy rolls her eyes and says "you don't want to know."
Upon making sure that the gifts are in place. She signals for both to be quiet.
Cuddy yells "Greg, can you come over and help me with the garage door. It won't close."
A buck naked House limps out of the garage and says "Why is it open? I made sure it was closed earlier."
Both Wilson and Jake immediately turn around at the sight of House in his birthday suit.
Wilson says "good god House! I guess, Mr. Happy is really happy!"
"He'll be much happier if you two are not here. What the heck are you two doing in my garage, anyway?"
Cuddy immediately grabs a piece of towel from the laundry/mud room next door and hands it to House to cover himself up. She replies "I ask them to help me with your birthday present. Surprise!!!"
And right on cue, both Wilson and Jake unveil Cuddy's gift by pulling the old bed sheet away from the black T100 Triumph Bonneville motorcycle.
House is literally speechless and gives Cuddy a hug and kiss.
Both Wilson and Jake yells "wooa, wooa,wooa" as they remind House to keep a grip on his towel.
House looks at Cuddy's eyes and asks "how did you know?"
Cuddy replies "your son told me that you've been looking at it online."
"What else did the little snitch tells you?"
Cuddy smiles and replies "the exact type of motorcycle jacket (gift from Emma & Henry) and helmet (gift from his parents) that you like."
"Does this mean you're not wearing any sexy lingerie for me tonight?"
***
Both father and son drive to work on their respective motorcycles. They walk in the hospital lobby wearing their leather jacket and blue jeans; with their backpacks on one shoulder and their helmets on one hand. It was truly a sight to see, as if Steve McQueen and James Dean have resurrected from the dead. Jake heads straight to the fourth floor to report to his new boss, Dr. Wilson as he begins his internship at the oncology department. House turns right to Cuddy's office. Like always, he barge-in without knocking and demands "what is so damn important that I have to be here at eight-thirty in the morning?"
"It's eight-forty five. I need you to cover Dr. Riley's lecture."
Begin of Excerpt
"Why? What's wrong with him?"
"Dr. Riley is throwing up; he obviously can't lecture"
"You witnessed the spew, or you just have his word for it? I think I'm coming down with a little bit of the clap. I may have to go home for a few days."
Cuddy laughs and replies "Dr. Riley doesn't have a history of lying to me."
"You said this is the fifth time he's missed a class this year! Either he's dying or he's lying."
"I'll give you two hours off clinic duty."
"Fine, I'll have Cameron do it. She loves inspiring the inspired" House starts to walk off.
"No, you'll do it."
House turns back and asks "Why is it always have to be me?"
"Because the world hates you. Or because it's a class on diagnostics. Pick whatever reason feeds your narcissism better."
"I'm not doing it." House leaves, stops at the door, and walks back in. "You're supposed to stop me and renegotiate."
"Hmm, and you were supposed to keep on walking. Sorry, I guess we both screwed up. Go on, do it again."
"I'll do the lecture for four hours off clinic."
"Two. I know you'd rather spend a couple of hours listening to yourself than listening to patients." Cuddy shoos House out of her office adding "class starts in ten minutes."
As House leaves Cuddy's office into the lobby of the clinic, nurse Brenda stops him.
"Dr. House, there's a patient…"
"I'm outta here, take it up with Cuddy."
A familiar voice calls "Greg"
House turns around to see his ex-girlfriend "Hi, Stacy."
"How're you doing?"
"How am I doing? Well, the last five years have been like… you ever see those 'Girls Gone Wild' videos?"
"Your life's been like that, or your life's been spent watching them? I have missed you."
"Is that why you're here?"
Stacy shakes her head and replies "I need your help." She hands him the films; and House limps over to the clinic desk to take a look.
"Who am I looking at?"
"My husband."
"Who is suffering abdominal pain and fainting spells. No sign of tumors, no vasculitis. Could be indigestion, or maybe a kidney stone? A little one can pack a lot of wallop."
"Did you think I wasn't going to get married?"
"Not to someone so poorly endowed. This guy's pancreas is pathetic."
House begins to walks towards the lecture hall and Stacy follows.
"There is no kidney stone, no indigestion. Three hospitals, five doctors, not one of them found anything."
"Well, maybe there's nothing to be found."
"Right, you suddenly trust doctors, love puppies and long walks in the rain."
"The walks are out."
Stacy grabs House's arm and says "I was around you long enough to know when something's not right. Mark's had personality changes; he's acting strange, disconnected…"
"Interesting. It means there's either a neurological component or he's having an affair."
"No affair, no nothing! He's sick! I know you're not too busy; you avoid work like the plague. Unless it actually is the plague. I'm asking you a favor."
"I'm not too busy, but I'm not sure I want him to live. It's good seeing you again."
End of Excerpt
Next Chapter – we begin a new story arc with you know who :-]
Author's Note #3: Please continue clicking the "Review this story/chapter" button at the bottom of this page. Feel free to send me your comments, questions and suggestions. I appreciate all types of feedback, it's the only way I know if you love, hate, or even reading this story ;-)