The adventures first...explanations take such a dreadful time.

Lips on my neck, whispering. I would do anything he wanted so long as it meant he would smile.

Marriage though? If I said yes, that meant I was going to take his life from him. Was I ready for that?
Was he?
He still didn't have the full story. The insatiable thirst the first year. The amazing strength and inability to control himself or his emotions in certain situations.

What if he stopped loving me after the change? Then what? What if he couldn't stop himself from feeding on humans? So many 'what-ifs', I attempted to wrap my brain around it all, which was proving to be difficult when his hands were on me, his lips leaving a fiery hot trail across my neck.

Slow down.

I pulled his face to mine, our noses touching, his breathing was ragged and excited over my face and once again I was almost lost.

I pushed the words out while I could still think.

"Edward, lets take this slow. Please? I'm not saying no. I'm not. But, Charlie, he hasn't even met you. And there are, things, we need to talk about. Things I want you to know before you decide that this is what you want." I wanted him.

I cracked a small smile.

"You make me lose control, and I have to be very careful around you. I want you, but I want to make sure you know exactly what this is. I won't let you make this decision without all the facts, Edward. Because I love you."

I tilted my face and pressed my ice cold lips to his warm soft mouth.

"I love you."

"Nothing is ever going to change my mind, Bella. I love you more than anything conceivable." I murmured against her lips. "More than my own life. I'd walk away from everything to be with you."

I didn't want to take anything slow when it came to her. In a week, my world had completely turned upside-down, our magnetic pull in sync, moving together yet separate.

Her lips pressed into mine and I inhaled her sweet breath. "I don't want to go slow," I confessed. "I want to make up for all the lost time," pressing my forehead to hers. "I've waited my whole life for you. I don't know how much longer I can wait."

The tense look on her face cut through me. "I would wait as long as I had to," I corrected. "Let's just get the details over with so that I can show you."

She never would have forgiven herself if she hurt me. I didn't want to force the issue. It would only cause her pain. My breathing steadied as I continued to lay with her, our bodies entwined.

"We're calling in whispers, we're tired of waiting

We'll take what we want and leave, leave what we know behind

We are still dreamers in our dead sleep, naked and tangled, twisted in love

And tonight we are the only ones who feel it

So let it last all night

Let the fire surround us, let it all cave in, let it all burn wild

We are leaving it all behind, we are leaving it all behind

Heaven is here"*

I couldn't hold still any longer, I shifted quickly, so that I was looking down at him, smiling when his hands rested lightly at my hips.

Gently I ran my fingers under his eyes. "I will miss the color."

I bent and kissed his eye lids.

I sat back up, resting my hand at the pulse on his neck. "I will miss the way your skin dances at your throat."

I kissed him gently and breathed in his spiced scent.

I settled my hand over his heart. "I will miss this wonderful song of your life."

My lips replaced my hand.

I sighed quietly, enjoying the moment, knowing that I had to keep going.

"Edward, when, someone changes," I paused to look at him, holding that connection. "they often aren't the same person they were before. You will be strong. Very strong. Stronger than me." I smiled at the thought of him keeping up with me.

"Your eyes, they won't be like mine. For a while. Or ever." This was a lot harder than I thought it would be. I could imagine his new face, my fingers absently dragged over his cheek.

"You won't be warm anymore. But, you wouldn't feel cold to me. Just to, others. Your skin, will be hard, almost impenetrable." I continued. "You won't be able to go out in public for a while, Edward. A long while. Until you have learned to control yourself."

My head dropped, my chin tucked, my eyes on his chest, watching it move with his breaths, his heart.

"You might not care for me, the way you do now. Everything will come second to your thirst. For a while. A long while." I looked back up into his eyes. "I would never leave you though. I promise you that."

I listened intently to her description of what my future held, relishing in the gentle kisses and tender touches against my skin.

"Impenetrable?" I pondered on it for a moment, then continued. "I should get a tattoo now, then, huh?" I smiled. "What would that do? When the skin changes? It'd be permanent, right?"

My eyes lit up at the thought. "Bella, as for the rest, I don't care. And I will always care for you the way I do now. You are my life. And you always will be. Nothing can ever change that." I kissed her forehead, knowing the only way to really tell her was to show her.

With a quiet sigh I added, "You'll see."

We laid in the quiet darkness for a while, our bodies tangled together as one. "You know what I am looking forward to?" I asked, already knowing the answer. "I can't wait for you to not feel like you have to control yourself around me. To feel like I'm so... breakable." I smiled at the thought of her free and uninhibited.

My eyes alert in the dark.

"How do you do that? How do you just, take everything so well? Aren't you worried? Scared? Apprehensive? Don't you want to know what you would eat? I mean, if I can help you get past the hurdle of your natural instincts."

I sat up, cross legged next to him.

"Your eyes, are going to be black, Edward. Your skin is going to be pale white. And you are going to be..." I couldn't help the words that followed. "... even more beautiful than you are now."

I groaned.

"Sorry. I know, most men don't like to be called the "b" word, but you are. To me."

Pulling his hand into my mine, I laced our fingers in my lap.

"If you got a tattoo now, it will be there after the change. It won't go away. That too, will be forever." I laughed quietly. "Better make it count."

"Black eyes. Check," I said with a shrug. "I'm okay with that."

I leaned into her with a smile, kissing the crook of her neck, "I'm not scared. I just want to begin the rest of my life with you."

There was one thing I was curious about. "Okay, so I've seen enough vampire movies to know that there's blood involved. But, I've never seen you..." I wasn't sure how to phrase it properly.

"So, what can I expect there?" This was a conversation about details, not concerns. "And what instincts? Are you saying there are options?" I inquired, very matter of fact.

Nothing could rattle me at this point. I would sleep in a coffin and avoid the sun for the rest of eternity with her beside me.

I knew what I was going to get tattooed before I asked. Something that would connect me to her as forever as this change.

Before I finished our conversation, I jumped up from his bed, peeling the wet denim from my legs, tossing them gently on the end of his dresser.

I opened a drawer and started digging, looking back over my shoulder, "Mind?" I pulled a pair of his boxers out.

"Your bed was getting wet. Don't want to make a mess."

I snickered at the double meaning and slipped the shorts on. Crawling back up the bed and into his arms. I smiled.

"Yes, there are, options." I twisted to face him. "Your, my, natural instinct is to, well." I moved my eyes slowly down his neck.

"But, instead, Charlie and I, feed off of animals. Deer, elk, " I grinned brightly. " bear... There's also lion, and moose. I find moose to be not so good. And even though I am, fed, I never really quite feel, 'full'."

She moved in a blur toward my dresser. And then, it happened. Her jeans were off. She was standing in a relative state of undress in front of me. My heart leapt.

Down boy.

"I have never minded anything less in my life," I answered, dazed in her wake. Before I could move to her, she was back in my arms. My hands slid along the length of her sides, crossing my wrists behind her back as I curled her into my body.

"Mhmm," I said quietly. "Animals."

God I wanted to ravage her. This goddess was laying beside me, talking about draining the blood of animals to feed and all I wanted to consume was every inch of her.

"Are you listening to me, Edward?" His arms were tight around me. "Are you cold?"

I shook my head, "No. Not cold at all." I brushed the hair back from her face. "Bella, I heard you. But, I told you," I reiterated, "none of this concerns me. It's all just details."

My fingers grazed her back, instinctively I was always trying to warm her, I think. "Do you see now? That the only thing that matters is you?"

I frowned.

"Well, it concerns me." I brushed my lips over his shoulder. "I just want you to be okay."

I pulled gently from his arms, propping myself up on an elbow to look at him.

"So, tell me about not going to school?" I smiled. "Please stay with me. Please? I want to do it with you. I want to enjoy these things with you before, well, you know."

I narrowed my eyes at her with a smirk. "You really want me there? It's that important to you?"

My hand slide along her jaw, tangling through her hair. "Please tell me you don't want to wait until graduation."

My eyes lit up.

"Graduation. That would be nice. I would love to watch you graduate, Edward." I frowned suddenly.
"There is one other item, I forgot to tell you about." I took his hand and placed it on my bare stomach.

"No family."

"Bella, graduation is a long time to wait," I bit my cheek in thought before the corner of my mouth pulled back. "Wouldn't you rather walk down the aisle than see me do it?"

I could see her face shift into concern as she moved my hand to her skin. My thumb rubbed against the place reassuringly, "I'm not sure that this... lifestyle," I struggled to find the right term, "is conducive to raising a family."

"I'm okay with that," my brows raised as I looked into her eyes. "Are you okay with that?" She seemed sad.

I shrugged silently.

"It makes me a little sad, now that I know you." I smiled weakly. "No little mini Supermen running around with fire for hair."

I kissed him lightly.

"But, I have also had a lot of time to come to terms with this. On my own."

I was enjoying his warm arms and his touch.

"Maybe, I could watch you graduate and then walk down the aisle?"

A compromise.

"Maybe," I said with a smile. "Let me talk to my advisor and see what I can do," I promised.

The clock lit up the corner of the dark room with a crimson glow. "I think we have a date with the Chief, do we not?" I brought her hand to my mouth, kissing the back before pressing her palm against my face.

"Probably best to get this over with," I added.

"Bella?" My thoughts turned to the various weapons of a police officer. "How's the Chief's... control?"

I swallowed hard.

"I think it's best we not discuss, marriage with Charlie yet, Edward. Let's let him warm up a bit." I smiled. "He's good. I promise. We just have to go easy on him." I cocked my head.

"He isn't going to nibble on you. His control is actually a lot better than my own." I frowned again. "He hasn't once fallen off the wagon."

A surge of need and love washed over me and I kissed her honest mouth. "Easy," I mumbled against her lips. "Promise."

Were it left to my discretion, we would have spent the rest of the night, the rest of eternity in that bed. I never wanted our bodies to be disconnected again. But, I had to meet the Chief. It was important that I have his blessing for what I was planning to do. Bella would forgive me eventually.

I grabbed my shirt and tossed it on. Edward handed me an old pair of sweats and a hooded sweatshirt to ride home in.

I was beyond nervous as we walked toward the front door.

I took Edward's hand and smiled up at him once before twisting the door open.

The tv was on. Charlie was sitting in his chair.

"Hey, Bells." He didn't turn to look. I know he smelled Edward. Sensed him.

"Why don't you both come in."

I heard the resignation in his voice. Edward squeezed my hand once and his entire face smiled.

I squared my shoulders and walked into the living room.

"Hey dad." I let go of Edward's hand, leaned to kiss Charlie's cheek. "This is Edward." I looked back at the most amazing man I had ever met. "Edward, this is my dad, Chief Swan."

I stepped back to stand next to Edward.

Charlie eyed us both.

*Dashboard Confessional, Heaven Here