Paper Hearts
Part XXI
One moment, one word, one question can determine the paths of the rest of our lives. It's not often we encounter a soul mate, someone to hold while the world falls down. But when we do, it is the most beautiful thing in the world and we seek such love out with every fiber of our beings.
Addison
"You're not eating that, right? Please tell me you're not eating that!"
"Of course I am," Addison told Callie, matching her skeptical stare with a bright smile. "The baby's hungry."
"For French fries, chocolate sauce, and peppers? Right," Callie snorted, eyeing the dish in Addison's hands.
"Delicious," Addison said. "You should try some." When Callie blanched, Addison laughed and continued into the living room, where Naomi and Miranda sat sipping margaritas and painting their nails. They both made disgusted faces when they saw what Addison was eating.
"Addie, sit down," Miranda said in a stern voice. "Derek made us promise to take care of you."
"Yeah, what is up with him lately? He was really jumpy this morning and freaked out when I started cleaning the apartment," she said, settling down to eat her snack. The other women exchanged uncomfortable glances and avoided her eye, which she normally would have found strange but was distracted by a pile of cucumbers on plate sitting on the coffee table.
"Those are for facials!" Naomi exclaimed, jumping up and swiping the cucumber from her hand. "Derek said to treat you like a queen, and I can't if you eat the raw material!"
"I think I'd rather sleep. Or get fat," said Addison contemplatively.
"No, no you don't," Callie said, showing her a bag full of nail polish. "McDreamy offered us chocolate if we gave you a spa day. We got cocoa butter for stretch marks, a mask for your face, and even a home wax kit. You are going to be beautiful?"
"What for?" Addison asked, closing her eyes. The baby had refused to calm down the night before, bouncing around inside her even after midnight. "I don't like to have sex this pregnant. Believe me, Derek tried to convince me, but I'm too much of a lump."
"Well, I want that chocolate," said Callie. "So lay back, Addison. It's three against one." Addison complied with a sigh, hoping that Derek didn't wait too long to come rescue her. The baby tumbled round and round and she nearly fell asleep as her friends exclaimed over her cuticles. Instead she though of Derek, and the softness of his lips, and his morning glory eyes reflected in their baby's face …
Derek
For once the clouds held back the rain, swaddling it and storing it for a later date. Anxiety bubbled like acid in his stomach. Was he doing this too soon? It had only been four months, but they had waited so long for each other, been through so much, and they would have a child together in two months … that seemed like solid foundation for an engagement. Not to mention that the sight of Addison made him crazy, and he was sure he loved her more than any person in the history of the world had loved another.
Though rain did not fall, the streets were wet, and they reflected the glowing lights of the city. People bustled around them, Seattle active like a livewire at night, glowing and pulsing and glittering.
Derek held Addison's hand loosely as they shouldered their way through the streets. The weather had improved over the last few weeks, meaning she only wore a light sweater dress that showed off her baby bump. Despite her slight smile as she took in the lively streets of Seattle, he could tell something was bothering her.
"Chinese?" Derek asked with a grin, pointing at a small Chinese place down the street. This was the only flaw in his plan: if she did not feel like Chinese food, he was in trouble.
"Sure, I think your kid wants some Chinese food tonight," Addison said, her hand automatically flying to her large baby belly. She'd gotten past the sickness, horniness, and cravings, and now she positively glowed. There was nothing more beautiful than Addison carrying his baby, and he was so glad that even before they knew they loved each other, she had still chosen him to be the father of what might be her only child.
"Two orders of Sesame chicken," Derek said as they stepped up to the register, because it had been their tradition since med school. He winked at the man behind the counter.
"Oh, you is Mr. Shepherd?" he asked while Derek shook his head frantically. Apparently the man had not exactly understood his English earlier.
"Uh, yeah," he said, digging out his wallet. "Thanks so much." He accepted the bag full of food boxes, utensils, and fortune cookies.
"Did you know him?" Addison asked as they took to the streets again, heading for the waterfront.
"Um, I've been there a few times before," Derek said, thinking quickly.
"You must have tipped pretty well, for him to remember you," she laughed shortly.
Derek merely shrugged and indicated that they had reached the correct spot. From their vantage point, they could see the ferries pulling in and lights reflecting off the Puget Sound. It was perfect. "So," he said to Addison, who was fiddling with her chopsticks. "What's going on, Addie?"
"Nothing," she replied, refusing to meet his eyes. She looked upset, but since he made sure she would spend the day with her friends, he couldn't imagine what could have gone wrong.
"Come on, Adds, you can tell me," he said persuasively. She looked like she was going back and forth about telling him whatever it was. "What is this about?"
"I don't – I just – What if I'm not good at this, Derek?" she asked, gesturing at her rounded stomach. Sometimes in the middle of the night he would lay beside her and just watch her stomach, occasionally being rewarded when his child moved inside her. "I can't cook. I suck at cleaning. I was raised by my family's cook! So how the hell am I supposed to do this, Derek?"
"It's the hormones talking, babe. You're going to be an amazing mother. It's always been you I've pictured carrying my kids, Addison. Not anyone else but you. And I know that you –" he grabbed her hand, "– we can do this. Together. I promise you that," he said earnestly. She seemed affected by his sincerity and smiled back uncertainly, moving their hands to the top of her bump.
"Somehow, I always pictured you being my child's father," she said, leaning against his shoulder, her mist-laden hair curling against the skin exposed by the neck of his sweater. "Not always in the traditional sense, but I would always see you and me and the kid, not whoever his or her father was. I guess my subconscious was trying to tell me something," she said ruefully. "I love you, Derek. You're my best friend in the world, and I feel so lucky to have you."
"I disagree, I'm the lucky one," he teased lightly. "But I'm also hungry, and we've got to feed our little monster." It was an apt description; Addison consumed her entire meal and then tried to sneak some of his. "That's mine, woman," he said when she reached for his food, blocking her fork with his. "You can have both the fortune cookies, though."
As he handed them to her his heart began pounding frantically, a drum against his chest. It seemed to talk her an eternity to select one of the cookies, heft its weight with a frown, and then crack it open, the light brown pieces falling around the shiny platinum engagement ring. Addison's eyes widened, and she gasped.
"I never want to spend a single day apart from you, because I will love you to the end of my life and beyond. So," Derek said, grabbing the other cookie and opening it to reveal the words inside. It read: Will you marry me? He held one of her hands as he got down on one knee to reinforce the message, "Will you marry me, Addison Forbes Montgomery?"
"Oh my god, Derek, I can't believe it – yes, yes of course I will!" she said, throwing her arms around his neck. He was slightly worried when she didn't say anything more, but then he realized she had broken down into sobs against his shoulder.
"Sorry," she sniffed, pulling back and straightening. "Hormones. This is a beautiful ring, Derek, how did you know?"
"I know you better than anyone, remember?" he asked, reaching for her hand to slip the ring on. It sparkled in the sparse Seattle light, a symbol of the small amount of hope, his hope that she would eventually love her, and her hope that she could, despite the odds, carry a baby, that had ignited their relationship past the bounds of friendship.
"How did you get the ring in the fortune cookie, though?" she asked, looking down at the pieces in her hands.
"Well, I wasn't too sure about how to do that, so Mark suggested I use bribery. I paid that man back there to put it in there," he said. "I told him it was a fake diamond so he wouldn't steal it."
"And he believed you?" she asked incredulously.
"It's there, isn't it?" he answered, grinning. She rolled her eyes and pressed her lips feverishly to his, moaning as he ran his tongue over her bottom lip. Their display was a little too ardent for the setting but he hadn't ever been less worried about modesty. Addison slid her hands down his neck to rest on his chest as she kissed him, and they were joined together under the sliver of moon, each equally unwilling to end their bliss.
Until Addison pulled back with a start and grasped her stomach. "Your baby is doing somersaults," she giggled after a second. "Here, feel."
Addison
"Is the baby a boy or a girl today?" Derek asked as he felt the movement beneath her skin. It was surreal to feel an actual living person inside her, for all she was used to it.
"Well, yesterday I thought she was a girl. But today I'm thinking he's a boy," she said thoughtfully. Some days she saw a little redheaded girl, proudly showing off dance moves to her, Derek and Mark in a tutu, and other days she saw Derek teaching their son to fish, the little boy excited as his father helped him real the squirming animal in.
"If you keep thinking like that, it's gonna be a hermaphrodite," Derek joked.
"Good one," she said sarcastically, heaving herself up to throw away their empty food boxes.
"Well, even if we don't know the sex because every time Dr. Cashew asks you, you refuse to find out, we can still pick up a couple things. A crib, toys … lots of stuff," Derek pointed out, grabbing her hand. "Or we can buy yellow or green clothes."
Addison wrinkled her nose. "Ew. My baby is not wearing yellow, at least not all the time. And green is a boy color."
"We wouldn't be in this predicament if you hadn't insisted on a surprise," he pointed out as they headed to the mall. It was crowded, teeming with people enjoying their Friday night out, but the baby store they entered was fairly serene. Derek headed off to look at furniture while she wandered through racks of clothes, occasionally touching an outfit she found particularly cute.
"Addie, I found a crib!" Derek called, and she wound through various displays to find him standing beside an expensive-looking white sleigh crib with sailboat bedding.
"It's perfect," she sighed, running a hand over the railing. "Beautiful. Although we can't buy the bedding." Derek grumbled, and she remembered his love for ferry boats, but then suggested a soft changing blanket, the top of which looked like a lion. "Oh, and look at this rocking chair, Derek! And this mobile, we could have a jungle theme!"
He smiled, nodding in agreement with what she said, but she noticed he had a far-off look. "What's up?" she asked.
"Well," he said. "I always dreamed I'd be here with you someday. I just never thought I truly would." She wasn't even given a chance to respond as he kissed her passionately, hands resting on the member of their little family that would be joining them shortly.
Hello, everyone! Sorry, I know it's been a little while. There's only three more chapters of this story after this, and the baby is born in the next one, which I'll try to get out soon!