Living Out in the Snow
The room is freezing when Kate wakes up and she burrows down underneath the covers, hiding her face against Castle's armpit. He's on his stomach, his face mashed down into the little space between their two pillows. She can only see the furry edge of his eyebrow and the curve of one ear.
She's never been very good at lounging, and now that she's awake her brain is eager to start the day. They have to drive back to the city, and she doesn't want to do it in the dark. They're aiming to leave at lunchtime, so the earlier she gets up the longer she can enjoy the cabin.
For half a second, she debates waking her husband. He needs his sleep though, and he's so far under that his chest barely moves. She slips silently out from their bed and pulls on a sweater and socks. Her bones are clattering and she hops from foot to foot, rubs her hands together.
Out in the living room, Kate sinks to her knees in front of the hearth and she sets the fire. It takes longer than usual because she's shivering, but she manages to get it lit eventually. She stays right where she is, palms held out towards the flames.
Her face gets hot and she has to move away from the fireplace, but the warmth is moving through the room now. Kate starts the coffee machine brewing and she ducks back into the bedroom to collect her phone from the nightstand.
Castle hasn't shifted and she lingers for a moment to watch him, the hulking mass of his body beneath the covers. She married this man, almost two months ago. It still feels unbelievable, and she has to leave the room so that her girlish pleasure doesn't startle him into awareness.
She hops up onto one of the barstools and scrolls through her phone while the coffee percolates. Kate hasn't turned her data on at all for their trip, and once they make it back to the city and her phone connects to the wifi she'll probably be inundated with messages and emails.
There are a couple of texts, one from Lanie and one from her dad. Both wish her and Castle a happy New Year and she smiles, sends her gratitude and her echoed sentiment back to the two of them. The coffee machine beeps to signal to her that it's done brewing.
Kate collects a mug and the creamer, and then she changes her mind and puts it back in the refrigerator. This is her husband's least favourite day of the whole year, when all of the holiday festivities are over with and they have to get back to the everyday.
Breakfast in bed is a small thing, but it's sure to cheer him up. She makes him a s'morelette, and one for herself too because she actually thinks his creation is pretty delicious. He taught her once and she goes through the motions now, humming to herself as she cracks eggs into a bowl.
Once she's done she fixes them each a mug of coffee and arranges their breakfast onto a tray, carrying it through into the bedroom. She sets it down on the nightstand and moves the coffee mugs, one at her nightstand and one at his.
When she climbs into bed, Kate hovers on her knees beside her husband. He's like a grizzly bear, broad and snoring, and she's loath to pull him out of hibernation. The prospect of spending this last morning without him is entirely unappealing though.
Stroking her fingers through his hair, Kate leans in close and puts her lips to his ear. "Good morning, sleepyhead. Time to wake up."
"Kate?" he groans. She gives him enough space to roll over and he flops onto his back, scrubbing a hand over his face. He blinks up at her and she smiles, shifting to fold her legs beneath herself. "Hi."
"Hi," she says back.
Castle works his way upright, stuffing pillows in behind himself. He tucks the covers in around his waist and lifts a hand to the back of her neck, reels her in for a closed-mouth kiss.
"I made breakfast."
She reaches for their food and moves to sit beside her husband, the tray balanced carefully over both of their laps. He moans his pleasure when he sees what she's made and he digs straight in, shovelling mouthfuls of chocolatey omelette into his mouth.
"You make them even better than I do," he says around a forkful.
Kate lays her cheek against his shoulder and chews slowly. She feels him swallow, and then his lips come to the crown of her head in a kiss. Beneath the sheets, he spreads a hand out over her thigh and squeezes the meat of her leg, his thumb circling.
"What do you want to do today?" she asks him. "Our last morning."
"I think I'd like to go for another walk in the woods." Castle picks up his mug from the nightstand and blows gently across the surface of the coffee before he takes a sip.
His plate is empty now, and Kate has eaten enough, so she moves the tray to the floor and nudges it away with her foot. She collects her mug on her way back to Castle's side. Wrapping both hands around it, she holds it to her chest so that the steam curls over the crag face of her jaw.
"A walk sounds great. Get some exercise in before we're trapped in the car."
"Hey?" he says. Mug put aside on the nightstand, he twists in bed to see her. "How did you sleep? You didn't wake me."
She lifts one shoulder in a shrug, takes a sip of her coffee before she answers him. "I woke up around two and had to take some more Midol. But I went straight back to sleep. I'm alright."
"Okay, good," he smiles. He's goofy in the mornings, his hair fluffy and flopping into his face. Sleep is crystalline at the corner of his eye and his jaw is scattered with prickly regrowth. "You want first shower?"
"Yes please."
Kate gulps down the rest of her coffee in a few mouthfuls, feels the scalding surge all the way down her gullet and into the pit of her stomach. When she's done she sets her mug down and she captures her husband's face between her palms.
Holding him in place, she darts in to steal a kiss from him. Just the careful touch of their lips, because her mouth tastes stale. Her fingernails scratch lightly over his scalp and he groans, a hand coming up to rest between her shoulder blades.
Her hair feels limp and disgusting, hanging like a dead thing over her cheeks. She scrapes a hand through it as she leaves their bed, tucks it behind her ears. In the bathroom she uses the toilet and washes her hands, inspects herself in the mirror over the sink.
Her skin is a little pale, but winter always does that to her. The happy lines around her eyes seem to carve deeper every time she sees them, but those she doesn't mind so much. Kate turns on the water and steps into the shower stall, lifting her hair away from her neck to let it get wet.
Their toiletries are lined up neatly along the little lip of the shower floor and she stoops down to grab her conditioner. Squeezing some out into her palm, she rubs her hands together and sweeps her hair over one shoulder, runs the conditioner through it.
She shampoos second, the lather sliding down her forehead so that she has to screw her eyes closed and tilt her face into the spray from the shower head. The shampoo sluices down her back and to the floor and she slides her foot through the bubbles before they disappear down the drain.
There's not enough water in the tank for her to shave and still leave some for Castle. They'll be back to the city and Castle's bottomless supply of hot this evening, so she leaves her razor and lathers her shower gel over her skin.
After she's rinsed clean she steps out of the shower stall and tips her head upside down, wraps a towel around her hair. The other, larger towel she tucks beneath her arms and knots it between her breasts. Kate pads back to the bedroom, droplets sliding down the column of her neck and absorbing into the fluff of the towel.
When he sees her emerge Castle climbs out of bed and heads for the bathroom. On his way past he captures her with his hands at her hips, and he draws her in close. Kate lays her forearms against his chest, her hands either side of his neck, and she accepts his kiss.
She leaves her hair in its towel hat as she gets dressed. Castle has left the bathroom door open so she darts back inside to rub some moisturiser into her skin and brush her teeth. He's in the shower stall and he swipes at the condensation of the glass so that he can see her.
His smile stretches wide and she grins back, blows him a kiss as she turns to leave the room again. Her blowdryer is still plugged in to the outlet and she works a little product through the ends of her hair, wipes her hands on her towel before she flips the blowdryer on.
She dries her hair upside down for volume, sifting her fingers through it to let the heat get to the damper parts. When she's almost done two hands come to her hips, but by now she's come to expect it and she doesn't startle. Instead, she rocks back against her husband.
He gives her room to finish up, and when she straightens and turns off the blowdryer he winds his arms around her from behind and props his chin at her shoulder. Castle kisses the lobe of her ear, captures it between his teeth, and she shivers under the cool mint of his breath.
"I'm excited to shower without the hot water running out halfway through," he says. His jaw grates against the bones of her shoulder as he speaks and he straightens up, comes to stand beside her instead. "Ready for a walk?"
"Let me get my coat and everything."
They'll need to pack when they get back later, and as she tracks through the cabin in search of her coat and hat she makes a mental note of where her other things are. It's not like it really matters if they leave something here, but it wouldn't exactly be convenient.
She winds her scarf around her neck and tucks the tails inside the lapel of her coat. Tugging her hat down over the tips of her ears, she finds her gloves and puts them into her pockets for later, goes in search of her rubber boots.
They're waiting by the fire, newspaper still scrunched up and stuffed down inside them. The insides are dry when she pulls the paper out though and she pulls the boots on, taps her heels together. Castle is right behind her, and he sits on the couch to put his sneakers on.
"Are they dry?"
"Not quite," he admits. "I really need some rubber boots. And some hiking boots."
She laughs and comes to stand beside him, sifting her fingers through the hair at his nape as he stoops to tie his shoelaces. "We'll get you all of the boots once we're back in the city. Something to look forward to."
"Life with you is something to look forward to," he says as he straightens. Castle takes her hand in his and tugs her down into the chair with him. It's an awkward fit, both of them squashing their lumpy bulk down into the seat.
Kate lays her head against her husband's shoulder, her legs dangling over the side of the armchair. Her feet feel strangely heavy with the boots on and she swings them, kicking against the seat.
"I know. I just mean- I have to go to work on Monday. But at least we've got Sarah Grace's birthday party tomorrow, and our shopping trip planned."
"Good," he says firmly. "As long as you know."
She struggles her way off of Castle's lap and out of the chair. He's right behind her and he slides his hand into hers, their palms clasped and swinging between them as they head for the French doors. Kate bounces down the porch steps and lands heavily in the bank of snow that the wind has collected against the foundation of the cabin.
Last night, she lay awake for longer than she admitted to Castle. The Midol took a while to start working, and she had been curled around her husband's arm with her knees drawn up almost to her chest. Outside, the wind had called out in mournful wailing as it moved through the woods. It made those branches tap against the kitchen window, without rhythm, and she had been unable to fall back to sleep for close to an hour.
Her jump sprays snow up in an arc and it covers Castle's pants. He laughs and does his best to shake it off, still clinging tight to her hand. The cold out here is immediate and she has to take her fingers back from him for just a moment so she can pull her gloves on.
They head for the tree line, their strides a little slower than normal because the powder sucks at their feet with every step. Olaf is standing tall, his face still cartoonish and sharp, and Castle flickers his free fingers in a wave as they head past.
They forge a different route to their walk yesterday, heading away from their own tracks. It means they have to move more slowly, less sure of the path, but she likes the challenge of it. A couple of times she almost trips, but Castle yanks her upright again and she manages to keep walking.
"I hope our bear friend is doing okay."
"He's probably sleeping again," she tells him. Kate knows that the bear looks adorable, and the temptation is almost there to try and find his den, watch him snooze. She grew up hearing horror stories from her father's friends though, and she knows better.
The woods are silent and still this morning, not even the robins with their prideful chests venturing out into the world. Her skin feels pulled taut across her skull with the cold and she wrinkles her nose again and again to try and work some feeling back.
A rustling catches her attention and she squeezes Castle's hand, brings them both to a stop. Kate holds her breath as the buck lifts his head. His antlers splay proudly and his warm eyes linger on them. His muzzle is snowy where he's been foraging for something to eat, and the tip of his pink tongue pokes out.
Castle is absolutely silent beside her, his fingers clutching hers so tight. His breath comes in little visible puffs as he holds eye contact with the deer. The buck's white tail twitches and he turns his head, hearing something their less developed ears can't make out. His body quivers, and in the next moment he's darting away deeper into the underbrush.
"Wow," Castle breathes. His body turns slowly to face her, but his eyes remain fixed on the spot where the deer just was until the last possible second. When they do lift to meet Kate's his face is slack with awe and she cups her hand at his elbow, worried he might go to the ground. "He was so majestic."
"He was," she laughs. Stepping in close, she kisses the corner of her husband's lips until he finds a smile and kisses her back. His fingers sneak into her hair and dislodge her hat. Huffing, she tugs away and straightens it again.
Kate sifts her gloved fingers through his hair in retaliation, messing it up, and he tugs away from her touch. "I recognised him. His eyes."
"You recognised his eyes," she says flatly.
"Yes," he says. His body comes awake in insistence and he lifts up onto his toes with eagerness. Clutching at her hand, he lifts it to his chest and traps it there. "He was the baby deer we saw in the woods with his mother. The first time we were here."
That makes her snort and she rolls her eyes at him, takes her hand back but lets him keep the loose clasp of their palms. "How can you possibly know that?"
"I just do. There was a connection. He recognised me too."
Kate hooks her arm through his and starts them walking again. It's too cold out to be still for long, so they continue to track through the covering of snow. They're both quiet for a little while, enjoying the soft sound of their footfalls, but then Castle pipes up again.
"He looked guilty. It was his fault I got poison ivy on me. I bet he knows, and he was trying to convey his apology."
"Uh-huh, sure," she says, has to press her lips together to stop her amusement from spilling out. Her husband is so earnest in this idea, so boyishly convinced, and she's not about to shatter it for him.
They have to separate when a log cuts across the path in front of them. It's tall enough that the crest of the curved bough doesn't even have a snow covering.
Castle hops over first, and the bulk of his body as he leaps over the log makes her choke on laughter. Bent double, she has to turn away and cover her mouth with her palm. When she eventually manages to stand up straight again he's got his arms folded across his chest and his bottom lip juts out in a pout at her.
Settling one boot firmly at the top of the log, Kate straightens her leg and lifts herself gracefully over it, landing on one foot at the other side. She doesn't really need help, but Rick catches her against the wall of his chest anyway, both arms around her.
"At least you got an apology now. After two and a half years." She pats his chest and then she breaks out of his grip and strides off.
He huffs as he catches up to her and she smiles, doesn't turn around. Kate lets him have her fingers again and they carry on walking. They chatter aimlessly, talking about Nikki and Black Pawn and then he tries to persuade her to come to the giant party the publishers are throwing for all of their authors later this month.
The moment he got the invitation in the mail he had asked if she'll come with him, and she'd said that she would have to see what her work schedule looked like nearer the time. Now, any opportunity to spend time with her husband feels sacred, and she agrees without hesitation to join him.
There's not really a loop through the woods, or at least there isn't one that won't take them hours to complete. They've got a lot to get done when they get back to the cabin, and she wants to leave right after lunch, so Kate squeezes his fingers in hers.
"Wanna turn around and head back?"
"Sure," he says. It feels pretty silly to spin on the spot and walk back the way they came, and Castle laughs as they turn around. This time he hooks his arm through hers and he kisses the side of her face, wet and making her wrinkle her nose.
When they get back to the log he refuses to let go of her and they have to climb over it together. It almost sends them both crashing to the ground and Castle shrieks, clutching at her to stay upright. She staggers, but she maintains her balance and she tugs on her husband until he snaps to attention and continues to walk again.
Back at the cabin, they strip out of their layers. The fire is still crackling in the hearth and after some prodding from Kate it leaps into life again. She sets their shoes in front of it to get dry before they need to pack them, and she pads in her socked feet to find her husband in the bedroom.
"What are we doing with the sheets? Wanna take them back to the city?"
"I don't think there's much point," she says. Kate leans agains the doorframe, shoulder and hip to the wood. Her husband has both of their cases open on the bed and he bends over, gives her a show as he empties the bottom drawer of the dresser.
When he straightens again he catches her looking and he dumps his armful of stuff into the case, comes for her in the doorway. Both arms wrap around her and he draws her in close until their hips meet. Her hair feels flat to her head from the hat, but he sifts his fingers through it and strokes down, playing with the ends.
"This is so much better than the last time we left," he murmurs. "We're going back to the home we share. I don't have to say goodbye to you."
Kate winds her arms around his neck and lifts up onto the tips of her toes, presses her cold lips to his warmer ones. Tugging back, she puts enough space between them that she can feel the curl of his breath, and no more. "Never saying goodbye to you again. My husband."
"My wife," he says back.
They're still in the doorway and she walks him slowly backwards, wishing their bed wasn't taken up by suitcases and her body wasn't betraying her. They're hindered, sure, but it doesn't mean that they can't fool around, and she aches for him. Instead of lowering him to the mattress she backs up against the wall, drawing him in.
Castle settles his palms either side of her head, body covering hers, and he comes in to kiss her. It's so good, the nudge of his thigh between hers and the slick work of his tongue. He breaks away from her mouth and his lips skate down her neck, his teeth nibbling very gently at her skin.
When he gets to her collarbone his tongue darts out into the pool of shadow beside it and she whimpers, rocking against him. His hands are underneath her sweater and he circles his thumbs against her hipbones as he kisses the hollow of her throat.
"Rick," she manages. Her skull is rolling against the wall but she fists her hands in his hair and drags his head up until she can see him. "We can't. We should pack."
For a moment she thinks he'll agree. Instead, his hands slide around to palm her ass and he hoists; her legs hook around his waist automatically. Castle walks her to the kitchen and sets her down on the island, his arms still tight around her.
"I never get to have you in the kitchen at home. One more time while we know nobody can possibly walk in on us. Please?"
It makes her laugh, but she's still rocking desperately against him and she arches her spine. Her breasts crush against his chest and Kate kisses him, biting down hard at his bottom lip only to soothe him with her tongue a moment later.
"I really think there's something to be said for soft surfaces," she gets out. The countertop is hard beneath her butt, and she's not convinced that Castle's going to be able to stay standing. "And horizontal ones."
"We've got the rest of our lives for that," he grumbles. "And the way we're going, the next time we're here really will be with the little ones. Could be our last chance."
"Babe, I do want to. But we can't. Especially not on the counter."
That makes him pause and he drops his hands from her waist, stuffs them down into his pockets instead. His head hangs, and he looks so terribly dejected that she can't help but smooth her thumb over the top of his ear. "We can still make out though right?"
"Yes," she says immediately. "Just- let's get somewhere more comfortable. Couch?"
"Couch."