Tony stood in the quiet hallway of the room that locked Loki in, which he hadn't been allowed inside at all since this whole thing had started several weeks ago. But today… today he would finally get to see Loki in person and not through a window or anything else.
The psychologist, Miranda, who had led him to this point, stopped right outside Loki's room and turned to him, smiling wanly. "He has made some progress," she said. They were just out of sight of Loki's window, so Tony couldn't see inside. He silently wished for her to hurry up. "He recently had a breakthrough moment where he almost made 'Amora' go away. Since then, he hasn't said much about her presence, nor has he been talking to something that is not there. We suspect he might be trying to push her out of his mind or that he is hiding her from us. We can't be sure at this point."
Tony sighed, feeling overwhelmed from it all. "What can I do?"
"We need you to see if he reveals anything, if there's any indication of the hallucination still being there. The medication should slowly be helping but we need Loki to work with us too."
Nodding, Tony looked over her shoulder at the door. He would do anything to make Loki better. Then he glanced back at her, saluting her, saying, "I'll do my best, captain."
She smiled. "I think Loki will need your positivity in his life."
"Thanks," he said, his chest warming with pride. There were not often times where Tony felt worthy of Loki, but every time someone said something like that, it slowly became more believable.
She moved aside and slowly unlocked the door. As soon as the door was opened, Tony was through it, stepping into the abnormally white room. Honestly, this room alone could cause a person to become more insane than they already were.
Tony paused just inside the door and took in the sight of Loki. Loki did not look as ragged as the last time he had seen him, several days ago. In fact, his eyes full of life and they lit up at the sight of Tony.
Loki straightened from his spot in front the window, where he had his feet kicked up against the window's ledge. He swung his feet down and stood in a flash. "Tony," he huffed, his eyes welling with emotion.
"Oh, Loks," Tony said, feeling himself breaking. He crossed the room in an instance and gathered his boyfriend into a tight hug, holding on for dear life. Loki, in response, wrapped his long arms around the back of Tony's neck, holding him closer still. Their hug elated Tony like a breath of fresh air. He kissed Loki's soft black hair, just above his temple. "I missed you," he whispered.
"I missed you more," Loki murmured against Tony's neck, tickling him with his hot breath.
"That's impossible," Tony said, pulling back just enough so he could rest his forehead against Loki's. "But honestly I think Sprinkles misses you the most. He practically wants nothing to do with me ever since you've been gone."
Loki laughed breathlessly. "I can't wait to go home."
"I promise, once you make a bit more progress, we'll get you out of here," Tony assured, stepping back but taking one of Loki's hands in his own and leading Loki over to the bed. He sat down gingerly and Loki followed just as cautiously. It was so awkward to be together like this after the way they had parted. "You know that I'm sorry, right?"
"Sorry for what?" Loki asked, glancing over at him and then at their intertwined fingers that were resting against their legs. They were sitting as close as humanly possible, as if afraid of losing one another.
"You know, for making you stay here."
Loki looked away, but ran his thumb across Tony's knuckles. "It was for the best. I need to stop seeing these… hallucinations."
"And are they going away?"
Loki's eyes flickered as if he was disappearing within his own mind. His gaze flicked to the corner of the room briefly and then back again. "She's… gone."
"Is she really?" Tony said. He didn't mean to sound so stern but he needed to know, to know that Loki was trying.
Loki nodded, letting his hair fall into his face. Tony tucked it behind his ear for him. Loki seemed to be trying hard to lie to Tony but Tony knew better because he knew Loki wouldn't act this suspicious if he was only telling the truth.
But he didn't argue. "Okay," he said, pressing another kiss against Loki's forehead.
Loki's gasp of surprise sent Tony's senses into overdrive. He promptly pressed a hand against Loki's cheek and pressed a chaste kiss against to Loki lips. Loki pushed back against him and deepened the kiss, opening his mouth to let Tony in.
They continued for a while, just the sound of kisses and gasping. "You know there's cameras in here," Loki murmured against his lips.
Tony smiled and pressed his lips to Loki's neck instead. "Has that ever stopped me before?"
Loki laughed and they made out some more.
"So how would you say that went?" Miranda asked, closing them into a private office room.
Tony sat down in one of the large leather chairs with his face flaming. "Well, I mostly made out with him," Tony laughed uneasily.
"I know," she said, seeming amused. "We do periodically check the surveillance cameras, you know."
Tony looked away, rubbing a hand through his hair. "Yeah, sorry about that."
"Not at all," she said, waving a hand dismissively. "I just need to know if you noticed anything in subtext. For example, was there anything off in his behavior?"
"I think he's lying about not seeing Amora," Tony said immediately. "It really seemed like he was avoiding the question when I asked about her and, I don't know… he was just looking around the room from time to time."
She nodded. "Just as we suspected." She scribbled something down in her notebook. "And how's his memory?"
Tony looked up at her in surprise. He didn't know how, but he'd basically forgotten about Loki's memory issue. "It didn't seem like he forgotten anything. It's kind of amazing."
"I think that is wear Amora comes in. I believe Loki uses Amora to store some of his memories that tend to slip away from him. I also think that he projects the ideal image of his mother onto his hallucination. He describes someone who helps him through all of his problems, who looks a lot like his mother, and who cares deeply for him. I think Amora, as well of his other hallucinations are a product of the head trauma and his past traumatic experiences."
"Is he still seeing other hallucinations?"
"He confessed that they weren't as frequent as seeing Amora. But when they do appear, Amora tends to warn them away."
"Oh," Tony said, sinking into his chair a bit. So if Amora really did go away, how would Loki cope then with the hallucinations that were ten times worse? What would he do if Tony wasn't there to help him?
"Tony," Miranda interrupted his thoughts, leaning across the desk. "I will assure you that Loki will lead a completely normal life like you and I. He will just require a bit more counseling and medications than us." She smiled softly at him.
He managed a smile and breathed out slowly. "Well, you're the expert. I'm sure you've seen cases like his before."
"I have," she said. "It's now just a matter of coaxing him into becoming independent of Amora again. However, I'm sure this is something Loki will have to struggle with time to time in his life."
But Tony was already reassured. He felt himself becoming suddenly light and calmed. He could deal with an occasional episode time to time because honestly he's much more surprised that Loki doesn't have any more issues beyond it, considering how much his boyfriend has gone through. "We can do it," Tony said confidently.
She grinned. "Glad to hear it. Now we only have to keep him for a bit longer and then we will discharge him into your care, but we can talk about that more when we know for sure that Loki is continuing to make more progress."
"Thank you for helping him," Tony said, standing to leave. He reached across and shook her hand. "I'll be waiting for your call."
Loki was lying underneath his sheets again that night, looking sadly at Amora who laid beside him. She was utterly pale and Loki could see practically all the way through her. Her face, again was littered with bruises and cuts, but it was somehow worse since he'd talked to Tony today. "I'm sorry," Loki whispered, choking back his tears.
"I thought we were going to pretend that you were better," Amora said, distressed.
"I'm sorry," Loki repeated. "I just couldn't lie with Tony looking at me like that. I tried, I really did, but lying to Tony feels like…" he trailed off, watching Amora's face.
She looked slightly upset but she mostly looked resigned. "I'm going to disappear," she said finally. She curled further into herself but neither of them tried to dispute it. Loki honestly knew that even if he didn't let her go, the medication would be sufficient in keeping her away often enough. "What are you going to do without me?"
Loki winced, thinking of Odin and the bathtub and the sensation of drowning. All of that sometimes came back in hallucinations seemingly as real as Amora, but Amora was often the one to snap him out of it. "I don't…" he stopped. "Actually I do know. I will use Tony and Thor to help me, I know it. But I just don't want to let you go yet, Amora."
As he said these words, she faded further. "I have to go."
"Please don't," Loki said, his eyes prickling with the pain.
A door opening and closing suddenly sent Loki straight up in bed and Amora was instantly solid again. There, at the end of Loki's bed was Obadiah, shadowed against Loki's dark room. "Just as crazy as ever," Obadiah said, his deep voice sending Loki disturbed chills.
"You're not real," Loki said quickly, trying to banish the man from his mind.
"He's real," Amora warned, standing from the bed, alarmed.
"I'm definitely real," Obadiah told him. "And I have a proposition for you."