"I'm a murderer."

That thought still pestered Octotto as he threw a fourth sword with pinpoint accuracy, leaving it quivering against the hastily-painted bulls-eye on the stone wall. He'd found the blades in the deepest chambers of the abandoned castle he now called home. A very temporary home, no doubt, but nonetheless it was a place of refuge against a growing number of species who defied him.

Yes, he had killed one of his own kind. Octotto would have liked to be able to say it had been nothing personal, but Septsiet had always irked him to no end with his goody-two-shoes model soldier act. The dead wolf meant one less to stand in his path anyway. So why was it bothering him?

Annoying behaviour aside, Octotto had to admit he hadn't really enjoyed shooting him. A few years back, when murder was just one of those dreadful things other people did, he'd figured that if you were going to take someone's life then you might as well take the pleasure of the kill along with it. Yet even now with his hands metaphorically stained red, he'd disobeyed his own outlooks.

Not that it really mattered. This wasn't going to change his intentions or make him have a revelation about the sanctity of life and suddenly become a God-following zombie like the rest would. "I didn't like it because even I'm not that twisted. I'm a man who's willing to do whatever it takes to get what I desire. That's all. Septsiet's death was necessary, and I'm going to think no further on the subject."

He plucked the sword from the wall and twirled it slowly. "Something bothering you, Heads?" he asked to the space behind him.

Although he couldn't see the fox, Octotto sensed him jump. "What the…how did you know I was watching?"

In response he simply tapped the glass surface of the orb on his head. Octotto hadn't so much as heard Heads breathing; it was the sphere set in the decorative crown which had alerted him. Its constantly glowing aura had gifted him not only the power of short-range teleportation and increased strength, but it had also heightened his senses until they were honed to an incredibly fine-tuned level – the evidence being the small dent in the wall where he'd hurled all four swords into that exact spot from thirty feet every time.

But his divine interventions and newfound physical prowess didn't make him feel like a deity. The orb wasn't just an energy source; Octotto was sure it had a consciousness of its own. Despite not being in possession of it for very long, he'd already experienced moments when he had not been himself, as though the orb hid sneaking roots that crept unnoticed into his skull to hijack his mind. And most worryingly of all, these blurs of uncontrolled thought manifested themselves as images depicting evils even greater than his homicide.

He wasn't a king with a mighty weapon. No, he was merely the servant of a higher power which could not function without a host. "For all I know it could have long planned to betray its bearer and decide to vaporise me when I achieve whatever the hell it wants me to do." Then again, this entire train of thought could be absolute rubbish – Deczehn had worn it for over a year, if undeservedly, and all he'd ever suffered from was a lack of ambition. Octotto had already concluded that the rewards outweighed the risks. "Even if it does want to exploit me, given time I'm sure I could learn to control it. Then I WILL be unstoppable!"

The hybrid-wolf realised Heads was still stood there, so he turned to face the kitsune and frowned. "You know, just because we're allies now doesn't mean I want you following me like a lost dog. This isn't a helpline; it's an agreement of fair give and take. When I put my plan on wheels, I expect you to assist. So when you come up a dastardly plot of your own, then we'll talk about how I can help. I'm not doing everything for you." He held the lethal sword casually, but it was raised slightly to emphasise his point.

"I've got something in the works." Heads replied in a bad attempt at being mysterious. "Let's just say Tails will be screaming in pain before I even draw the first drop of his blood!"

His voice was seeping with hatred, but Octotto could only hear the boy's undeveloped tone behind the words. Heads sounded exactly like Tails had when the wolf had first met the group of Mobians: like a child. To Octotto, hearing the accidentally cloned fox spitting such dark promises in his relatively high voice was, in short, hilarious. "Sounds intriguing…I can't wait for your scheme's unveiling." he said slowly, trying to minimise the sarcasm. "So why are you watching me chuck swords at a castle wall? I know I'm good, but still…"

"Too good." answered Heads with a poisoned smirk. "And I've got a feeling it's that thing on your head that's responsible for the sudden talent."

Octotto clapped loudly, this time making no attempt to conceal his sarcastic demeanour. "Bravo! Genius! No-one else would ever guess it's the thing I killed for which is improving everything about me!" He laughed when he saw the state of Heads' unappreciative face. "Oh dear, you really don't have time for anything except revenge, do you? Fine then, let's talk business. What intrigues you so much about the orb?"

One side of Heads' face fell as though he'd just asked the dumbest question in history. "Well, let me put it this way. Sensing other people when you can't see or hear them. Huge gains in physical power. Teleportation, for God's sake! What sort of crystal ball can give anyone those abilities?" The fox folded his arms and a look of intense curiosity appeared on his face. "I'm intrigued by everything about it! How did Deczehn originally obtain it? Where did it come from? Is it from your home planet? Why does it glow when it's on your head, but never did on Deczehn's?"

Octotto held up a hand to signal for Heads to stop the bombardment of questions. "Just a minute! First of all, even I don't know everything about it. But even if I did, I'm sure you can understand that I can't blab everything to an ally who hasn't yet proved his worth." This was one thing on which Octotto was adamant; he couldn't afford to spill secrets of the orb's past, lest Heads almost certainly make an attempt to swipe it. He was rightly suspicious of the fox's motives and actual sanity in the first place, so letting him in on any valuable information may well end up returning as a knife in his back. Heads knew what powers the orb bestowed – that was more than Octotto wanted him to know already. "The only question you asked which I'm prepared to answer is that it glows when someone of worth wears it. What the thing considers 'worthy' is another story, but it's obvious that I possess far better traits than Deczehn. Hence, I get the lovely benefits."

"Fair enough. But if that's your only offer, don't expect me to tell you anything either." the fox replied curtly. They stood in tense silence for a few seconds before Heads released his breath in a frustrated sigh and turned to leave. "Come see me when you realise the advantages of logical teamwork." he said. Heads looked back and shook his head, stopping for a moment at the top of the ancient steps leading down to the entrance of the castle. "You're as tight-lipped as that Seedrian was…" His footsteps echoed as he left.

Octotto had actually zoned out at 'advantages', not in the mood to get a hypocritical lecture about trust by a bitter being who knew very little about the real world. Yet one word which had passed over his ears did a U-turn and connected with his brain. "What did you say?!" He whirled around in search for Heads, but the damned fox had vanished. "Wait! COME BACK!"

Heads launched back into the room, fists raised – then lowered when he realised there was no enemy. "You nearly frightened the tails off my spine! What was that yelling for?"

Octotto grabbed Heads' shoulders in a vice grip. "Did you say…Seedrian?" His victim tried to wrestle free but the wolf only squeezed tighter and shook him. "I said, did you say 'Seedrian'?! Answer me!"

Heads growled. "Yes! She's the green-haired girl I was telling you about when we first decided to work together! The one who was regenerated with me before I got dumped as the expendable extra! Now LET, ME, GO!"

As if he was going to do that. Octotto picked him up by the throat with one hand and carried the struggling animal to a stone stool, where he near enough slammed him onto it. "You're going to tell me everything you know about this Seedrian! How was this girl regenerated at the same time as you? Why did those Mobians bring her back in favour over any other dead Seedrian? WHERE IS SHE?!"

"So now you want to talk?" Heads spat on the floor. "Pah! Like I said before, my lips are sealed unless you've got something useful to talk about with that orb!"

Octotto waved a hand dismissively. "Yes, yes, whatever you need to know! I'll tell you every last scrap of knowledge I have! But first, you must tell me about the Seedrian!" Throughout his entire miserable life, he'd never changed his mind so quickly and with such certainty.

But the orb didn't matter anymore. If what Heads was saying was true, the shining sphere inside his usurped crown would become a laughable side-show. Because Seedrians were the reason his life had taken the horrific turn which had left him traumatised and scarred. Seedrians had made his existence torturous until they'd started their civil war and almost wiped themselves out. And if there was so much as one measly Seedrian still feeding from breaths of the same air as him, he would hunt until its body lay in a lifeless pile of bloodied rags before him.

Killing Septsiet had been quick and unpleasant. But this time, he would savour every second of murder.

Tails had always thought that finding a rabbit who loved her friends, was very dependent on others and also had a particularly distinguishable voice wouldn't be a difficult task. However, with five sharp animals failing to locate her, he was rapidly being proved wrong.

He gave up. He'd looked everywhere: in the attic, under the stairs, in the basement, under the beds – name it and he'd checked it. As a last resort he'd searched his workshop and underground storage lab, although her absence there came as little surprise seeing as access to both of his prized facilities required the new password.

It was his fault. The moment he'd left Cosmo to sleep away her troubles, he'd known something was wrong. His senses had been screaming it. Tails had expected to hear perhaps the television blaring downstairs, or maybe rustling in the kitchen as she prepared herself a snack. Even being the endlessly polite girl that she was, she would know that she was welcome to anything in his house; they were best friends and those were exactly the kind of indulgences which Tails knew she would immediately go for. But the house had answered with silence.

A hurried skim of his home had only confirmed his fears. Cream was gone.

Thankfully the rest of his friends had arrived minutes later, but that had still been enough time for his brain to panic and assume another kidnapping. He could tell that everyone was more than a bit miffed about being instantly sent back out as a search party, with grumbles such as "So much for my power nap…" being thrown around by Sonic. Yet they were all aware how critical a fast reaction was and so they'd split up, Amy trying to call Cream's mobile phone as she left.

Tails had stayed, of course. Someone needed to be there to ensure Cosmo's safety; in the last few hours she had endured more suffering and been steamrolled with more emotions than many experience in a year. Who better to guard her than Tails? "I'll protect her with my life. There's nothing I wouldn't do to make Cosmo happy after everything she's been through."

Yet still, as though the universe was deliberately victimising him for a cheap laugh, relaxation refused to enter his system. The notion that as long as Cosmo was with him then he'd be content had flown out the window from that first heart-stopping second of realising Cream had vanished – Cosmo represented a brand new world filled with promise, but his friends were his rock, standing strong as an unmoving shoulder upon which he could lean whenever he needed to feel the comforts of old times. He couldn't live without them.

Since he couldn't sit still or disturb Cosmo, Tails wandered helplessly around the house. Doing nothing was fruitless, but what could he do? Cream had surely been kidnapped; she was slightly irresponsible sometimes, yes, but she wouldn't just leave without telling him. Cursing himself for making the same mistake as he had when Cosmo was stolen, he let out a defeated groan of pain. There was nothing he could do except wait for Sonic to play hero.

Wound up as he was, the suddenly very loud beep of his phone ringing made him jump out of his skin. Checking the ID revealed it to be…Amy? "Oh no…this can't be good…" She was definitely the least likely to have rescued Cream, leaving only the possibility that something had gone horribly wrong. With a shaking hand he lifted the receiver, knowing news of someone's bad injury would be fed into his ear by a panicking pink hedgehog.

It actually turned out he was wrong again, and this time he was damn glad for it. "I've found her." Amy said, sounding relieved herself. "Don't worry, she's…she's not got any bruises or cuts."

Tails frowned at the uncharacteristic pause and odd choice of words. "Are you sure Cream's alright? How did you rescue her?"

"Like I said, she's…not been touched." Amy spoke cautiously again. "And in fact Cream called me first to tell me where she was. Tails, she wasn't kidnapped; she just went to the Luctumarbor."

The Luctumarbor was a lone-standing tree not far from his house which he and Cream had discovered shortly after his third birthday. Neither of them had christened it with the foreign name, someone else having already carved the letters into the bark. A special place was reserved in both of their hearts for it – they'd spent many afternoons just lying under its protective shadow, sharing what back then was important to them as toddlers. Of course, what with the unfortunate process called growing up and the even more unfortunate plotting machine that was Eggman's brain, there just wasn't time anymore. Tails felt a small pang of longing; he still missed those carefree hours with her.

Nevertheless, that was hardly important right now. "Hang on…wasn't kidnapped?" Tails repeated in disbelief. "Are you telling me Cream took off for no reason without leaving so much as a note, probably knowing that we'd all fly into a frenzy looking for her?"

"Yes and no." came Amy's annoyingly uninformative reply. "I wouldn't say it was for no reason."

The kitsune ran a hand through his bangs, getting increasingly fed up with her evasive attitude. His voice nearly automatically raised but he restrained himself; running the risk of waking up Cosmo wasn't appealing. "So Cream's told you why she ran off?" The silence on the other end was all the answer he needed. "Then tell me!"

More silence, but this one couldn't give him any sort of unspoken meaning. Tails was about to demand an explanation again until he remembered something else. Their reasons for no longer visiting the Luctumarbor delved much deeper than a mere lack of time. That day, on Cream's fourth birthday…he didn't even want to recall anything about the horrific incident. Just lying under the tree on her day of celebration, only for that to happen – the old place now held nothing but painful memories.

And Cream had gone there. Tails felt an unpleasant stinging sensation in his stomach as Amy's careful comments that Cream only had no 'cuts or bruises' began to make grim sense. "Amy…be honest with me." Tails spoke as calmly as possible. "Is she ok?"

"I told you before." Amy replied quietly, although there was a certain edge to her words. "No-one's touched her."

Enough was enough. Tails stormed into his living room and shut the door so Cosmo wouldn't hear before shouting "Stop dodging the question! You know what I mean! I have the same right as you to know if my friend is happy!"

Amy's return scream rendered him unable to hold the phone closer than five inches from his ear. "FINE! NO SHE'S NOT ALRIGHT! LISTEN!" She must have brought her phone closer to Cream because the unmistakeable, terrible sound of the rabbit sobbing began vibrating in his head. Plenty of times before he'd seen her cry, but her weeping seemed to be fuelled by a pain he'd never heard from her; the noises she was making were indescribable. "I CAN'T CONSOLE HER! SHE'S ABSOLUTELY DISTRAUGHT, AND GUESS WHOSE FAULT IT IS!"

Tails closed his eyes, feeling the rhetorical theme of conversation looming again. Shouting back at Amy would result in nothing more than hard feelings and awkwardness when she returned to his house, so he lowered his voice. "What do you mean? Is it anyone's fault? Amy, please just tell me what's wrong with Cream."

After an exasperated moan, the hedgehog somehow managed to calm herself for once. "Look, it's not for me to say, and it's really not something to be discussed over the phone. Cream will tell you when she's ready." He heard a few shushing noises and quiet words of reassurance as she attempted to stem the rabbit's flow of sadness, which Tails could still hear. "We'll come back to yours as soon as Cream feels ready. I'll phone Sonic and Rouge to tell them she's safe; you call Knuckles."

Tails inhaled slowly, fighting for full control of his breathing and heart rate. Glad that Amy was finally making sense, he said "Alright, but try not to be too long. And Amy…!" he added quickly before she hung up. "…why isn't Cream ready to tell me as well? I've known her all my life and we're best friends, so I'm sure I can help her feel better. Can she truly not tell me the problem?"

"…No." came the blunt reply. "She can't."

The call disconnected. Tails foresaw a wave of depression about to strike but momentarily pushed it back – he still had a job to do. Punching numbers into the phone didn't release any tension whatsoever, although at least he'd been tasked with informing the least talkative animal. The fox and echidna each spoke a single sentence before ending the call, Knuckles' being "Got it, on my way back."

Now Tails allowed his body to collapse onto the sofa and his mind promptly attacked him with raw guilt. The knowledge that Cream had deliberately ran away without telling him, the fact that it was to their once special place where she had fled, the way Amy had yelled at him to 'guess whose fault' it was – all of this amounted to one glaringly obvious reality.

The blame lied entirely with him. There was no escaping that he had driven Cream away, and no matter how much he wished he could be clueless as to the reason, Tails' incredible IQ didn't even need to dip into triple digits to figure out why. Simply put, he had neglected her. But it was with a tsunami of shame that he realised there was no simple way of expressing the sheer extent to which his ignorance had stretched.

Tails had always got along with Cream, but it was after Cosmo's death that their bond had become both even stronger and yet simultaneously so much more distant. Cream had been the one encouraging a positive attitude and the development of their friendship, always prepared to listen and offer support. She'd visited him far more often than could be considered fair on her part, and even when Vanilla had prevented her daughter from seeing him anymore, Cream had phoned him every single day. Just to talk. So he could get things off his chest. So he didn't go insane.

Her devotion to ensuring he didn't lose the will to live if his efforts to bring back Cosmo failed had known no bounds. Tails had transformed into a spiteful recluse, snapping at anything that dared try to sympathise with him. Most of his friends had stayed away not because they didn't care, but because he'd practically locked any path into his life so no-one could enter. Not Cream, though. The rabbit had pushed past his mental barriers and ignored his cries to be left alone; she'd known better. She knew he'd badly needed a very close friend in whom to confide, and had provided exactly that. Tails hated the thought, but he recognised that without her, suicide would have been an option in serious consideration. "If it wasn't for Cream, that fantastic day when Cosmo returned may well have been the day of my funeral…"

And how had he repayed her? By ranting on and on about his broken heart and how much he missed Cosmo, never once stopping to ask if she was hurting about the Seedrian's death. In hindsight it was very obvious that Cream had been in a state of deep distress, but she hadn't shown it, bravely deciding to utilise her pain in a constructive manner to guide him through the darkest days of his life. Yet time after time he'd repelled her with the belief that he didn't need anyone but Cosmo – selfish and foolish were not words which justified the behaviour of the cold-hearted fox that had reigned within him during those months. Aside from ripping their relationship apart, he'd done nothing but waste everything the rabbit had selflessly sacrificed for him.

Physics dictated that every action had an equal and opposite force; Tails now realised just how true this was. Cream was the rightful positive force with a constructive result, while he had wrongly acted as the opposing destructive force. And as any scientist knew, adding together opposite forces of the same magnitude gave you nothing. A flat line. Something dead.

Tails felt like that now. No living thing would require more proof to conclude he was guilty of mistreating his best friend, but this expansive field of Cream's altruism hadn't yet even touched upon her more recent deeds, including her intended gift of a Chaos Emerald as well as spotting the mistake with the radio wave machine. "How could she remain so loyal and want to give me something so precious after the hell I put her through? I should be the one giving her absolutely everything…" But it seemed that Cream could just take no more of his ungratefulness, and Tails couldn't blame her. "No wonder she ran away…how can I ever make it up to her?"

His tears had started falling quite a while ago, but the very likely possibility that Cream now truly hated him caused a massive wall of despair to crush him. Tails found himself lying on his stomach with his head buried in a cushion, reduced to a wailing mess of fur. All he could do was lie there, paralyzed and emitting the same strangled noises as the rabbit had over the phone, the same girl he didn't deserve to know. "P-please C-Cream…I-I'm s-s-so sorry…" his mouth uselessly begged independent from his brain. "I s-still want t-to b-be your friend…d-don't l-leave me…"

If Tails hadn't felt the hand gently grasp his own, God only knew how long he would have remained in his psychological torture chamber. But the contact, along with the comforting sensation of a second hand stroking his muzzle, gave him the incentive to lift his head.

Cosmo was kneeling down next to him with a look of pure concern radiating from her beautiful eyes. "Tails…" she spoke softly in that sweet voice of hers. He wanted to ask her what she was doing, tell her to get back into bed, but his mouth could only form more plaintive sobs. Cosmo's continued attempts to get through to him were in vain as he allowed the self-pity to overwhelm him; perhaps suffering for long enough would indemnify a small part of Cream's misery which he had caused.

In spite of a desire to ignore everything, an unusual sound was surprisingly effective at making anyone become curious and look around to deduce the source. Tails experienced this when he heard a nearby jingling noise. His head instinctively shot up to see Cosmo holding the bell he'd given her earlier. She rang it again, this time not to grab his attention but instead to stir his memory of its meaning. "She wants to talk to me."

"Cosmo…" he managed to say while wiping away the tears. "I'm sorry about that, what do you want to -" But she silenced him with a finger placed on his lips, and using her other hand she held the bell out to him.

It took Tails a moment to realise it was a gesture of offering – she wanted him to take it. Slightly confused, he slowly closed his fingers around it before Cosmo returned to caressing his fur. "Tails…I can't bear to see you unhappy. You're too noble and caring to admit it, but I know you sometimes suffer from the same self-confidence issues as I do." A contorted frown spoiled her flawless features. "Please forgive my childish behaviour before – I was just so worried that you didn't love me because I tried to kill you." Although a lonely tear fell down her cheek, Tails sensed she would quell the others as her lips curled into a sad smile. "But you were right, as always. That sleep really helped, because I woke up knowing that everything you said was true. You honestly love me. And I love you too…so very, very much. So now it's my turn, Tails. Let me heal you. Please…talk to me." Her eyes glanced towards the bell in his loose grip.

An invitation to liberate some of his haunting shadows had just been extended to him by his angel. The part of him which wished only for Cosmo's happiness wanted to refuse help, but holding every fleck of shame about Cream inside was just impossible. Tails knew what he had to do.

Cosmo smiled as he rang the bell.

Things are still moving pretty slowly here; I figured that after the danger-filled and mostly action-orientated run that was chapters 12-19, a lull was in order where everyone isn't trying to kill each other.

But as they say, nothing lasts forever...