My Beautiful Disaster.

Chapter Twenty.

When the doorbell rang the next again morning, I jumped out of my skin. I had just got out the shower and had my hair piled on top of my head, held together with a towel, as well as wearing nothing but my silk robe. I hoped I knew who it was; opening the door to a stranger would be pretty embarrassing dressed like this. I glanced at the clock I kept telling myself to replace. The damn fish stared right back at me. I saw it was just after eleven; I'd slept in pretty late. Usually I was up quite early for my morning run, but that had been overlooked this morning. I had more Edward related thoughts in my head than the urge to go out and run.

Edward. Who was possibly at the door. I pulled the robe tighter to my body while my bare feet ran across my wooden floors, still cold from the morning air. Moving the towel out of my hair, I quickly ran my hands through the think mess, trying my best to looked presentable. The bell rang again, and I shouted that I would be there quickly. They'd know the reason as soon as they saw me.

I thrust the door open, the wind flowing through the door as soon as it was open. Hiding partly behind the door, I peeked around the corner, eagerly awaiting the beautiful face. And there it was. Defined jaw, amazing green orbs, long manly nose, and those lips that were begging for my kisses. He was there, his lips curled up into a smile, and I couldn't help but do the same. Infectious, but I'd happily have his disease.

"Good morning, Bella."

His voice filtered sweetly into my ears, and it was if they were opened for the first time. Such a gorgeous sound, and in my opinion no concerto - no matter how much I loved music - could do his voice justice. My ears seemed attuned to the sound that passed through his lips.

I smiled wider. "Edward. Come in,"

I opened the door a little wider allowing him to slip through. His strong body passed through the crack I'd left him, and as he entered my small, modest home the lights caught his eyes making them greener than ever. I was momentarily stunned. How could so much beauty be bestowed on just one man?

"Oh,' His voice came through my thought filled mind. 'I guess I should have come a little later on. You aren't ready."

My eyes locked on his and I followed his gaze, taking me down to my own appearance. His gaze stayed on me, almost hungrily. It made me blush. I pulled it closer to my body, only making my curves more pronounced through the thin fabric. I was pretty sure it gave nothing to his imagination. I coughed, embarrassed. "I'm sorry. I just wasn't expecting you so early. Please, make yourself at home, and I'll finish getting ready."

He nodded after a few seconds where his thoughts were obviously somewhere else, and then he turned, smiling at me once more before entering my living room. I took this opportunity to follow his sleek back, watching his body make every move he wanted it to.

"Staring isn't nice, my love."

It was my turn to blush again. Caught. I bit my lip, before running up the stairs to get ready. Getting into my room I fumbled about with my drawers and wardrobe desperately trying to find something suitable to wear. Truth was, I had no idea where we were going. I walked quickly to the hall.

"Edward?" I yelled, and his body appeared in an instant at the bottom of the stairs.

He looked panicked. "What?! What happened?"

I laughed lightly, still quite stunned by his beauty. It hadn't hit home that he was completely mine, and only mine, yet. I shook my hand. "Relax, nothing's happened.' I watched as the tense posture he held calmed, and then his crooked grin appeared. 'I just wondered where we were going?"

"Just lunch. To the café in town."

I smiled before blowing him a kiss and scampering back into my bedroom. Finally knowing where we would be going helped me pick my outfit: a pair of skinny jeans with a red long-sleeved top and my black flats. I didn't wear heels on a regular basis; my balance didn't agree with them.

After running a brush through my hair, and letting my unruly curls settle I grabbed my jacket and went downstairs. As I reached the bottom the sound of music floated to my ears, Duffy's soulful voice drifting through the air. I smiled as I heard Edward hum along to the tune. It appeared he didn't know the words. I stood in the doorway watching as he explored my living room, even though he had been there once before. His fingers flitted across my bookshelves, fingering the spines of the books, then onto my CD collection. His gaze seemed to lower until he reached the bottom shelf. Then he reached down and began to open… My Book.

"And that's when I step in." I said aloud, watching as he jumped up and turned to look at me, guilt in his eyes. I gave him a small smile before ushering him away from the shelves and taking My Book into a locked cupboard playing it there, before hiding the key. I hoped I would remember where I'd put it later on.

"I'm sorry," He murmured with the remains of his guilt still written in his eyes.

I smirked slightly, before walking over to him. "It's alright. Just don't do it again. It's… personal to me. But, just so you know, when I'm ready, I may show you some of my pieces."

He reached out taking both my hands in his and pulled me closer to him, our entwined hands swinging as our arms hung at our sides. His eyes bore into mine, and a peaceful, love-filled look took over him. It was a beautiful sight, and to know that look of love was for me made it even better.

His face closed in on mine. I could feel his sweet breath on my face, drawing me, tempting me in even more. "I won't do it again. Promise. Now, I never got to say a real hello to you…"

His lips pressed into the side of my neck and my heart beat quickened considerably. I wouldn't be surprised if he heard it. Then his lips moved upwards, pressing kisses at every inch as he spoke, "And that - kiss - wouldn't be - kiss - very nice - kiss - of me -' He opened his eyes while his nose was touching mine, his lips mere inches from connecting. 'Would it?"

I shook my head, releasing our hands and pulling his head forcefully, joining our lips together. I needed him right now. I didn't want to wait. I never wanted to wait for Edward. I'd done enough waiting. But not anymore. As our lips moved together in a quick but passion-filled pace, I felt his sense of urgency. We both felt we had time to catch up on. And I wouldn't be the one to stop.

But eventually he began to pull away. My eyes flickered open to watch him watching my expressions, and he kissed away the crease in my brow. "I want to take you to lunch, Bella."

I crossed my arms. "I'm not hungry, for food."

He rolled his eyes but I could tell he was reluctant at leaving the moment we had behind. He grabbed my hand, kissed the palm, and then smiled. "Tough, we're going. I'm not budging on this one."

I moaned. "But Edward…"

He pulled my face into his hands, something I wasn't objecting to. He kissed my cheek, then said against my ear, "I want to take my beautiful girlfriend out to lunch.' He pulled back, watching as the blush spread right on cue across my cheeks. He fingered the rushing blood. "Is there something wrong with that?"

I wanted to complain, wanting to stay here instead. There was a number of reasons: I liked the fact that Edward was in my house. We already started and he, pulling us away from our activities, stopped us. And then there was the fact that he planned to spend money on me. Anyone who knew me knew I didn't like money being spent on me. But… he didn't know me that well, only that I loved him. So going out would help us get to know each other better. It began to sound like a better idea.

So I stopped moping, and put on a bright expression. "There's nothing wrong with that.' Leaning up, I pecked his lips, lingering slightly before pulling away. 'Let me just grab my bag and jacket, and we'll be out of here."

After getting my stuff he took hold of my hand, leading me to the door. I grasped my keys, stepped out into the slightly cold air, and locked the door behind me. I turned back around. "Will we walk, or take my car?"

His crooked grin returned. "We'll take my car, if that's okay."

I hadn't noticed the shiny silver Volvo sitting beside my car on the driveway. It was sleek and as Edward walked towards it I realised how beautiful they looked together. A Volvo was obviously his type of car. My Beetle was nothing compared to it. And if I still had my trusty truck from high school I probably would have been more embarrassed. But thankfully my truck had gone a long time ago. That was a sad day…

He walked around to the passenger side, letting me get in and do up my buckles as he got into the other side. Once we were ready, we were speeding towards Port Angeles, our hands tied together on the gear shift.

The ride as quiet but not uncomfortable. It gave me time to gather my thoughts of the last two amazing days. If you had told me that I would be Edward's girlfriend yesterday morning I would have slapped you in the face telling you nothing of that greatness would ever happen. But yet, here I am. Sitting here with my Greek God of a boyfriend. I never used to believe in miracles, or God, but someone up there must like me right now. I tentatively touched my gold cross, smiling slightly. Charlie would tell me it was all up to God. Maybe, I'm starting to believe him.

There are so many emotions running through m veins right now, you can't even imagine. This is what love feels like. And I feel privileged to be able to say I feel the power of love, even when I've only reached my 22nd year on this Earth. It's too good to be true; it's all a dream. But then all I have to do if look to my side, and find Edward there - then I know it's all happening.

Within minutes it seemed, we were at the restaurant. It was a small, quiet restaurant, not overly extravagant, but just perfect. As you stepped into the place it felt as if you had walked into a magical land. The lights dim; the colours mysterious. It was beautiful and I was glad I hadn't refused to come here. I think this will be my new favourite restaurant.

Edward's hand clasped itself around mine as we were led to our table. We sat down, Edward pulling out my seat for me before taking his own, and then we were given our menus.

"So you know what you'd like? You can have anything you want, Bella. It's all on me." Edward told me tenderly.

I glared at him, "Edward…" Surely by now he had guessed my aversion to people buying me things.

"Bella, just let me get this. It's special; our first date." He stroked my fingers from across the table, looking up at me from under his eyelashes. All thoughts disappeared. Stupid, sexy man.

I relented, deciding on the mushroom ravioli, while Edward went for the roast duck. The waitress took back our menus, staring at Edward a little too long for my liking, and then went off to the kitchen. For now, we were alone.

He pushed his chair closer to me, taking my hand up to his lips and kissing it gently. He then lai our hands down on the table, but made no move to let go. As if I would mind, anyway.

"How are you today, my love." He seemed to pull me closer.

I nestled my face into his neck, kissing it gently, before pulling away and looking straight into his green eyes. They were mesmerising. "I'm too happy for words. Right now, with you…. It's just surreal."

He kissed the top my head, his arm draping around me, enclosing me. I felt safe in his arms. "This is all real; it's all happening. And… I'm so glad it did. I don't know what I'd have done, Bella, if you hadn't said yes. The thought of you in another man's arms…" He trailed off, either unsure of what to say or too caught up in his apparent anger. I could see it in his face.

I trailed my fingers across his wrinkled brow, causing them to fade. I smiled. "You have nothing to worry about on that front. I'm yours, completely. I--I love you."

I decided on the spare of the moment to throw myself out there. I told him how I truly felt, and lowered my eyes, scared of what he would say to me. Doubting; I was always doubting myself.

But this time, my doubts weren't needed.

"Oh Bella, I love you too."

There was no other things needed, no kisses, no embraces, no words. Just looking into each others eyes was enough. I could see all I needed in his and hopefully showed him enough in mine. My brain caught up with me, realising that he loved me. He. Loved. Me. Me? Yes, me. It became more unreal, but I knew this was it. He was… it. The thing I needed. The thing I craved. The thing I… loved. And I knew that my feelings would never change. His name, Edward Cullen, was engraved in my heart forever.

As we seemed to be going down the route of explanations, I decided to add, "At one point, I thought you'd never be mine, Edward. Before… it was torture."

He pulled me tighter to him, telling me he was sorry for what I had gone through. I felt selfish for I knew that he had gone through pain also. But at the moment all that mattered was that he was in my arms.

"I know,' He choked into my neck, kissing in apology every so often between his words. 'I went through the exact same thing. The pain was… at some points excruciating. And I'm sorry I made you go through that. I just wish, more than anything, that I could go back to that day and make it better. I just hope that I can make it up to you in the time we had together, from now on."

"You have no need to apologize. It was me too. I put myself out there, and caught you off guard, and I'm so sorry. You loving me, is more than any amount of money is worth. Your love is all I want." I moved my hand up to cup his face. I hoped no-one was watching. I had forgotten I was in a public place. But all that mattered right now was this moment, when we shredded down every wall and division between us. "But I do want to know something… why did you act that way? Everything seemed to be fine, and then suddenly it wasn't."

He took a deep breath and I see him mentally preparing his thoughts. Then he tucks a strand of hair behind my ear. The exact same action he did that night. Except tonight he pulls he closer to him, and doesn't distance himself. "I was scared, confused, everything all at once. It was a scary thing to feel. I had no control. I wanted to tell you know I felt but… it just never came. So I pushed you away, something I deeply regret. But I felt… like I wasn't worthy. Like I had nothing to give you. I didn't want to hurt you. But it seemed like I did anyway.

"I loved you then, as I do now. You have to understand: I wanted to tell you, so desperately. But something was stopping me. I felt as if I didn't deserve you. I am nobody, Bella. But you, you are somebody. You're gonna be somebody - I can tell. The thought of having you hang onto me, being pulled around with me; I couldn't do that to you. I don't want to… pull you down, with me.

You are so special to me, Bella. The thought of stopping you from---from being able to be with someone worthy, it killed me. I felt as if I would rush you, being with you.' He paused, looking at me. 'But then I found I couldn't help myself. I couldn't stop myself from loving you; wanting to be with you.' He chuckled, then shrugged. 'So, I'm sorry. But I can't live without you, so you're going to get dragged down with me even if you don't want to."

He acted as if his words meant nothing, but his eyes told it all. All of what he'd said, he sill felt. He still felt that being with me was destroying me. I had never been met with such an absurd statement. He meant the world to me - how could that destroy me? But there was something else, something large and pressing that he wasn't told me. But if there is one thing that I know it's how he'll tell me once he's ready. So I'll sit and wait for a proper explanation.

But right now, the only thing I want to do is wipe the pain away. "To you, it might sound stupid. But you, are the person I live for now. You are my life. And I want to be dragged down, because as long as you are in hell with me, it'll be my heaven."

Yes, it was cheesy, but it worked. His grin reappeared and almost all traces of hurt in his eyes were gone. The waitress then chose to come over, handing us our food and we happily dug in. It was delicious. For now, we moved onto other subjects.

"I meant to thank you again for Alice's birthday present; It's all she's talked about since this morning. It doesn't matter that she has a hangover, she can still talk for America." He rolled his eyes.

I patted his cheek. "I'm sorry. I wouldn't have got her it if I knew it would cause you trouble."

"Nonsense, she is overjoyed with it. She was on the phone already with Rose asking what to pack and everything. What dress to wear, all that sort of thing. It's important so she told me."

I must have looked amused. "She's packing for this trip in October, and it's weeks and weeks away."

He nodded, a small smirk on his lips. "Yes."

I laughed, grabbing my glass of juice before taking a sip. "She certainly doesn't hand around. I swear she was a cheetah in the last life. So quick."

He chuckled. "You're telling me."

The waitress returned after we had finished asking us if we wanted desert. We declined, taking coffee instead. It arrived within minutes and then we were left again to continue with our conversations. I moved closer to him, tucking my feet under my legs and nestling into his side.

"How is your father, if you don't mind me asking?" I didn't mind at all. If anything I was happy he'd asked. It showed he wanted to get to know more about me, and my family. I felt as if he was already taking steps to reassure a future for us, even if we had only been together a day. Personally, I felt as if we'd been going out a long time before.

I smiled up at him. "He'd fine. I talked to him last night actually. He'd recovering well, and I'm glad he's remembering to take his medication. Actually, he knows about you now. He went all fatherly on me and wants to meet you at some point. But don't worry, I'll throw him off."

His expression changed. "But Bella, I'd love to meet him. He's a part of you, and I want to get to know all of you. It's important to me. Please."

I couldn't say no to anything. So I just nodded, "Soon."

He settled with that answer for now.

We simply cuddled as we drank our coffee. We didn't need to do anything. We were happy in our own company. It was peaceful for the most part; families with children arrived at some point and soon the restaurant was filled with giggles and childish squeals. We laughed as we watched the small human beings wander around this foreign land. It seemed like a different world entirely to them. Adorable smiles lit up their faces, and when I looked up I saw Edward smiling at me. We both thought the same thing: someday, we'd have children together. The thought made my heart burst with love for the man beside me. How could someone be so perfect?

He strokes my hair, before saying, "Bella, I hope you know that I'm going to do everything in my power to stop myself from hurting you again. The thought of hurting you again, it kills me. I'm going to try not to. I promise."

I nod, kissing his jaw. "I know. And I'm glad. I don't think I could go through that sort of pain again. It hurt so badly. And now that I have you, it would hurt so much worse."

His hold tightened once more. "It'll never happen."

I snuggled into his side even more. "Thank you."

We sat in relative silence again for a while, before the sound of my phone vibrating in my bag alerted us. I grabbed my bag, digging through it until I found my phone, lifting it out to see who was calling. I smiled, then looked at Edward, "Alice."

I pressed 'call' and answered. "Hi Alice, how are you?"

Her excited tone shot through into my ear. "I'm fine, how are you?"

"Amazing."

She laughed in her high pitched way. "I bet you are. I never got a real chance to thank you for what you've done to my brother. Seriously, it's only been a day but I can already see how much happier he is. You are making that change, and I can't thank you enough for bringing him back to life."

I felt tears prick my eyes at her heartfelt words. She was such a sweet person. I reached for Edward's hand, looking up at him while I replied to his sister. "Alice, you have no reason to thank me. Edward makes me happy. I hope I can do the same for him."

He squeezed my hand and I felt my heart pump faster. Alice's chirpy voice flowed through mine and Edward's silent conversation. "…you're already doing it. Where are you, by the way? I was going to pop over to yours, but when I phoned you were out."

I plopped myself over to Edward again, feeling as if this would be a longer conversation than I thought. I got comfy into his side before I answered. He was happy just playing with my strands of hair. "I'm actually out at lunch. With Edward."

"With Edward? I though that was still in the house. No wonder I couldn't find him at lunch time."

I chuckled down the phone. "Well, he's right here with me. Maybe he left in amongst your long phone calls to Rose about fashion week. Apparently you're packing already."

I heard he huff at the other end. "For your information Bella, it takes time and effort to get the correct outfit ready for fashion week. You can't just turn up in your jeans and trainers. It's a hard decision. You don't want to be mocked.' She paused, before replying in a smaller voice. 'Thank you so much for the tickets. It was too much, but I love them so much."

If we were in the same location I would have hugged her. "You're my best friend. I'm allowed to spoil you. And it was your birthday! So just enjoy them, with Rosalie."

I could see her smile at the other end. "I will, and so will she. We are so excited! Anyway, I cam to ask you what you are doing tonight."

I paused, before Edward's voice shot into the phone for me. "She's doing nothing, Alice." I slapped his face out the way, earning a small chuckle from him before he resumed his task with my hair. I coughed slightly. "What did you have planned?"

"The choir. You haven't been in ages. We haven't sounded as good since you haven't been there. Please come, we all count on you to bring as all together." She begged me.

Who was I to say no? "Sure, I'll come. Same time, same place?"

"Yep." She replied, happier now she had her answer.

I signed off. "I'll see you then, Alice."

"Okay, bye."

I snapped down my phone, ending our call, and then slipped my phone back into my back. I leaned back against Edward's chest to see him staring down at me, a smile playing on his lips. "What marvellous plans have you got for this evening then?"

"The choir. I haven't been in a while; it'll be nice to get back." He nodded in understanding, placing a comforting kiss on my hair. "Are you okay with me going?' I asked, suddenly worried. 'I mean, if you'd rather I was with you, I'll call and say I can't go." I felt as if I should be spending as much time with him as possible. I was determined to be the best girlfriend imaginable - I knew it was so I was comforted in the hope he wouldn't let me go.

He shook his head. "Bella, I don't mind what you do. Like you said, you haven't been in a while; it'll be nice to see the people again. And I can't keep you away from my sister for two long. I can share you, you know."

I giggled, before silencing him with my lips.

----

I spent the rest of the day with Edward, until he went away just before six. It was nice to finally spend time with him, with no-one else around. It was just him and me. Not that I didn't like it when we were together as a family, but it felt more personal just the two of us. Needless to say, I was looking forward to all the moments in the future when we would spend valuable time together.

As it neared seven, I quickly shrugged my coat on again, hung my bag off my shoulder and made my way out of the house to go to the church. I had to admit I was excited. The last couple of weeks had been bad for me, and I hadn't really sung, just written. It felt nice to know that I was going to welcomed back into the choir family and warm up my vocal chords again. Of course, now that me and Edward were on good terms again, my piano lessons would be continuing. We had discussed it this afternoon and he had told me that I was quite ahead of schedule. I just couldn't wait to compose music for my lyrics. The finished piece would be, I suspect, a very emotional thing for me to hear. It has been something I've wanted for so long, to finally reach it; it'll be something else entirely.

My thoughts had clouded my mind but I'd still managed to find my way to the church. I made my way up to the large doors, stepping inside. Turning around I was met with many smiling faces and lots of friendly waves. It was like coming home from a holiday. I'd missed this people. A lot.

Alice came running into my view, hugging my fiercely around the waist as soon as I entered. She held onto my arm as I put my coat and bag on a peg, then dragged me to sit down at the seats. Others came around us, eager to let me know that I was still welcome. I felt myself tear up at their friendly natures, feeling really accepted in this group.

Eventually people started to settle down, getting into their seats and taking out their music. Ben, the pianist and conductor - the leader of all of us - stood in the front.

"Hello everyone. I hope you had a fantastic week, and are ready to start singing again." Many pleased murmurs surfaces around our fairly large group. I smiled. "I'd like to personally welcome Bella back. We've all missed you and your glorious voice." I ducked my head as people around me started to stare. I few leaned forward and gave comforting pats on the back. "Now, let's get started."

Everyone started to get up and shuffle towards the piano. I took my place beside Alice. Ben reached over the crowd and gave me an extra music sheet. "We've learnt something new." He eyed me, then smiled. "But, we haven't found a lead yet. Think you're up to it?"

I didn't think I'd be thrown in at the deep end straight away. But I smiled, eager to sing once more. I smiled back at him; he was a nice man. "Fine. But let me hear everyone else first."

And that let him into the tune, with everyone's voices flowing into my ears. Which also lead to many tunes that night. And I was so glad I'd come; I felt another piece of the life I'd lost come back to me.

I felt like I was home.

A/N; Thank you for all the encouraging reviews for last chapter. I had some great ideas given to me, so thank you for that too. Someone asked about Emmett, and I'm actually surprised no-one had mentioned it before. Yes, he will be in this story, but he won't come in the way you might think. Why would I leave him out? Rosalie needs some love too. (:

Anyways, thanks again, and I hope you enjoy this. Please review!

PS. Sorry for any spelling errors. :D