A/N: I am so totally writing this at work right now. : )

Thank you so, so, so, so much for the amazingly, heartbreakingly wonderful reviews, guys. Seriously… I don't think anyone's ever been so nice to me before. It made me super-eager to update, too, so job well done.

I'm just going to jump into it. I don't own Twilight or its characters… but I do own a rather extensive DVD collection and a wide range of Ikea home furnishings… so there's that.

Chapter Twenty-One

Edward Cullen.

I laid next to him in my bed, staring off into space and thinking about everything and nothing at the same time. Last night, and yesterday… really, every day since I had met this boy has been an adventure.

Damn was that boy a roller-coaster ride.

We kept going from highs to lows and back again… up and down, back and forth, over and over. No two days were the same, no two conversations were similar, and for some reason I loved it.

My whole life had been relatively even, relatively vanilla. Renee had been a definite handful, but she had been my only real variable. My friends in Phoenix had all been pretty standard. Standard conversations, standard slumber parties, standard trips to the mall and mid-afternoon movies. Boys had been standard, too. Dinners, movies, holding hands in the hall between classes, akward goodnight kisses.

When I moved to Forks, my life was flipped upside down, and there was a rather large part of me that applauded the upset. All of the drama, the panic, the frustration, the excitement… it made life so much more interesting. I felt like I was actually living now, rather than eeking by, hoping not to be noticed. And I had Edward to thank.

Our talk yesterday had been intense. We'd made a nice pattern of talking, then kissing, then talking, then kissing. We even talked while kissing on occasion. I had never enjoyed kissing so much in my life. I had never enjoyed just being with someone in my life. Even when we were miserable, even when I was furious with him, I always felt better in his presence. It was as though he had been designed for me, and I for him. It was amazing.

And it was unsettling.

I am 17-years-old. I'm a junior in high school. I am not ready to be in love.

From the moment he told me how he felt, I knew I was in trouble. Unrequited love is one thing. It's so much easier to be in love with someone who doesn't love you back. The gravity of that reciprocation is what kills relationships. When you love someone who loves you back, well, it's scary.

Don't get me wrong. The fact that he reciprocates is amazing. It's incredible. He is the most beautiful creature I have ever laid eyes on, and I would never in a million years have imagined that someone as astounding as him would ever say those words to me. I feel honored and blessed and lucky and gracious. But it's still scary as hell.

I've been in "relationships" before. I've even had boys profess love for me before. But none of it was serious. I mean, it's high school. How serious can you get?

I always just thought of boys as convenient distractions. If I thought one was nice, I went out with him, and when it stopped being nice for me, we broke up. That was the end. It was more semantics than anything else. More a matter of classification than a state of being. I had "dated" and been "an item" and paired off, but I had never felt attached to the other person. As akward as things had been with Mike, I still probably would've gone out with him a few more times. At least, that's what the old Bella would've done. New Bella was an entirely different story.

I've said it before and I'll say it again. Edward Cullen has ruined me for all other men.

Now that I know how things can feel, I know that I can never go back. No more uncomfortable hand holding and tepid kisses. No more tolerating the presence of another. No more fake smiles and faker laughs. I'll never be able to do that again.

Kissing Edward is a religious experience. The way his lips feel against mine, the way electricity zings through my entire body just by touching him. The sounds he makes when he feels good. It's addictive. He's addictive. He's my personal brand of heroin. I'll never want anyone more. I'll never be satisfied with anyone but him. I am so totally fucked.

"Bella," I heard a soft voice say, pulling me away from my thoughts.

I turned my head towards the source of the noise, towards the beautiful boy who was lying next to me, his arms wrapped tightly around my waist. We had laid like this all night, talking quietly and reveling in the feeling of being together. But it was morning now and time to go to school, and I was suddenly terrified that this closeness would disappear when we returned to our normal routines.

Edward saw the fear in my eyes and smiled at me reassuringly.

"Bella, love, I'm going to run home and get changed," he said softly, kissing the tip of my nose before beginning to withdraw his arms from me. My body tensed when he wasn't touching me anymore, and he kissed me again before standing and walking to my window. "Get dressed, Bella. You'll need to leave soon."

One last smile and he vanished.

I felt the loss immediately, and cursed myself for becoming so attached to him so quickly. Still, he was right. I only had about 30 minutes before I had to leave. I sighed heavily before swinging myself out of bed and going about my morning routine.

I opted out of a shower given the late hour and yanked my hair into a pony tail, smoothing it down with some water from the sink to try and tame the frizz that had emerged as penance for Edward running his hands through my hair so much yesterday. I shrugged on a long-sleeve t-shirt and some jeans and hobbled downstairs to find that Charlie'd already left. This was not a good sign. I was definitely running late.

I was pulling on my jacket and halfway down the lawn in front of the house when I saw him. He was leaning on his Volvo, smiling at me in a way that should be illegal in most states. His hair was damp, his clothes were immaculate, and his eyes shone with happiness in spite of the dull grey of the morning. He was perfect. And I looked like hell. What a bastard.

"I was wondering if you'd like to ride with me today," Edward said, grinning like a fool. I wasn't used to seeing him this happy, and I decided to make it my mission to keep him this way.

I shrugged noncommitally as I altered my path, walking towards his car now. I was ecstatic that he was here, enthralled to see him so soon, but there was no way in hell I was going to let him know that. The boy had enough control over me already.

"Good morning, Ms. Swan," he murmered, leaning down to kiss my cheek. "And how was your weekend?"

"Eh," I shrugged again, following him around his car and dropping ungracefully into the passenger seat as he opened the door for me. "Not great. Nothing major happened."

His smile faltered and I felt guilty. He hadn't gotten the joke. He closed the door before I had a chance to say anything, and was in the driver's seat within seconds.

"Edward," I said gently, reaching over the center console to take his hand in mine, "if this is going to work between us, you're going to have to develop a sense of humor."

He looked at me for a moment before leaning towards me slowly, his lips parted, his eyes locked on my face.

"Bella," he breathed, in a voice too sexy to be allowed.

"Y-yes?" I stammered, willing my body to calm down, trying to force my hormones to behave.

"If this is going to work between us," he continued, taking my face between his hands and leaning closer still, "you're going to have to learn to be funny."

His face split into the widest grin I'd ever seen, and he leaned back, gripping the steering wheel and laughing at what had to be a look of pure frustration on my face.

"You are such an ass," I muttered, smacking his arm lightly as he pulled out of my driveway and into the road. He smiled wider, reaching over to hold my hand and humming to himself as he drove.

In what felt like moments, we were pulling into the school parking lot and parked in his usual space.

And then panic set in.

We were at school.

And we were a we now.

Wait… were we?

We hadn't discussed this.

I hadn't thought about it until just now.

We should have talked about this.

All that wasted time last night, talking about favorite songs and childhood aspirations… we should have taken the time to talk about what would happen today.

Fuck.

I sat frozen in the passenger seat, watching the students mill around the parking lot, walking reluctantly towards the school. Suddenly, dropping out of Forks High and convincing Charlie to homeschool me was very attractive.

I looked desperately at Edward, willing him to suggest we skip school or move to Australia. He just smiled knowingly at me before getting out of his car and walking around to open my door for me. It was funny how quickly I had gotten used to his speed when we were alone, because seeing him walk at human speed was somewhat unsettling.

Too soon, my door was open, and a pair of cool hands were helping me out of the car and wrapping themselves around my waist.

"Are you ready, love?" Edward murmered in my ear, pulling me close to him for a quick hug before taking a step back and surveying the people around us.

Needless to say, there was staring. A lot of staring.

My face went from ivory to pink to red in record time, while the adonis in front of me just smiled, reaching down to grab my bookbag and throwing it over his shoulder as he began walking with me to my first class.

"Just breathe, Bella. In and out. It's not that bad. You'll be fine."

He kept up the chant all the way to the doorway of my classroom, and stood with me outside for a moment, leaning against the wall and pushing a lock of hair from my face.

"Edward… what do I… people are going to ask questions. What do I say?"

"Say whatever you want, love."

"But, I mean… can you hear them? What they're… you know…" I didn't want to talk about his special 'gift' in front of the throng that was lingering a bit too closely to us in the hallway. He nodded at me, his lips turning up into a smirk. He was enjoying this too much. "So…?"

"Newton will not be talking to you this morning. He's fixated on what happened over the weekend. And he's lucky I don't walk into that classroom right now and break a desk over his skull for what could've happened to you…" his whisper went from calm to seething and I gently pulled his hand into mine hoping it would calm him down. It did. "Thank you. Anyway, Eric won't say anything either. You're safe for now. Be afraid of Jessica, though. She's going to interrogate you the first chance she gets."

"What will she ask?"

"Oh, no," he chuckled, shaking his head. "That's too much fun. It's all you."

He bent down to plant a quick kiss on my lips before handing me my backpack and walking away.

Life is so not fair.

A/N: I know that was a quickie, but my battery's dying and the idea of quitting mid-chapter is troublesome. I'll give you a longer one tomorrow. Scout's honor. Well, it you keep stroking my ego, that is…